Prelude to Destiny
by Selene Elven
Summary: You meet forever in the smallest of ways. Beca encounters destiny in the form of red hair and blue eyes, and finds that it's everything she's ever dreamed of. But is it enough to keep them together? Or does fate have something else in mind?
1. Day 1

**AN: This story is Beca-centric. It has small time jumps. It will have plenty of fluff, but also plenty of angst. It is inspired by someone's real-life story, mixed with my own experiences. However, this is its own thing, a Pitch Perfect interpretation with artistic liberties. If you don't like emotional extremes, this probably isn't the one for you.**

 **Please enjoy my first story.**

 **All my love,**

 **\- Selene**

 **Dedicated to the man upon which this tale was based, and to everyone that believes in a love more powerful than we can comprehend.**

 **Formatting Details:**

 _Memories_ in _Italics_ : _Flashbacks (self-explanatory)_

 **Emphasis** in **Bold** : ex. (She didn't think the jeans made her butt look **that** big...)

 ** _Beca's Personal Thoughts_** in ** _Bold Italics, Emphasis_ _underlined_** : ex. ( ** _I don't think these jeans make my butt look that big..._** _)_

* * *

Prelude to Destiny

A Waking Dream

* * *

Beca wakes up abruptly, the ringing of a fading dream sounding in her ears. Whatever it was she was dreaming about, it was loud.

She rubs her eyes, not surprised to find that she was sweating. After a couple of deep breaths, she notices that the lighting in the sky is a little brighter than it normally is when she wakes up. Picking up her phone and checking it, Beca swears as she notices that she's half an hour late for work.

She sees missed texts and calls from both Jesse and Cynthia Rose, asking if she's coming in to work today. She shoots a quick text off to Jesse telling him that she woke up late and will be heading over in a bit.

Beca rushes through her morning routine, grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge instead of the coffee she normally has. Since Jesse spent the night at Benji's, there was no pot warming for her to take advantage of.

As she rushes through the doors of the Los Angeles music shop, Cynthia Rose calls out a cheery greeting in her smoky voice. She leans on the counter and smirks at Beca.

"Hey Captain, I didn't think you'd make it!" CR notices the tired look on Beca's face. "Whoa, did you sleep at all?" Beca grimaces.

"Yeah, I just had a terrible dream right before I woke up. I'm okay though. What do we need to do today?" Beca asks as she walks to the back office to put her bag away.

"Just got some new instruments in, you can help Jesse with that."

Beca brightens up at the news. "Awesome! What did we get?" Cynthia Rose smiles.

"Some Gibson, Martin, and Taylor guitars, Pearl drum kits, and Stentor violins. " Beca's eyes go wide.

"Dude! No way!"

Cynthia Rose nods. "Way."

Jesse walks up. "There's my wayward rebel." He comes up behind Beca and messes up her hair. Beca grunts and pushes him away roughly.

"Yeah, hi to you too, ass." She bites out as she tries to fix her hair. He just laughs.

"I missed you so much. I thought you'd never return to us." Placing his hands over his heart, he furrows his brow at her. She scoffs and rolls her eyes.

"I swear, I'm an hour late and you guys think I'm never coming back." Having had enough teasing, she looks around for the new instruments. "Let's get to work. Where's the new gear?"

Jesse motions for her to follow and they head over to the guitars, where the instruments are waiting to be hung. He picks one up from its box and hands it to her as she steps up onto a step ladder.

Beca whistles. "This is a beautiful guitar." She runs her hand over the face of the Martin, imagining owning one. Working at a music shop is the next best thing, but she can't wait until she can call one her own. She hangs it up reverently and holds her hands out for the next one.

Jesse nods. "They use these pretty often when they record music for soundtracks. Hey, did you know that in-" Beca coughs loudly.

"Still don't care about movies, dude." Jesse looks personally offended and gears up for the traditional talk. Beca looks away from the Martin and across the room, completely missing his tirade.

She spots fiery red hair and the bluest eyes she swears she's ever seen. The woman is standing with a blonde as they chat by some sheet music. As her tunnel vision clears, she realizes that Jesse is still talking.

"-ca? Beca! Where did you just go?" Beca mumbles something about movies being painfully predictable as she looks back at the guitars and continues hanging.

Jesse gasps. "You seriously need another moviecation if you are still fighting the magic of cinema." She grumbles another bit about it not being magic if she knew what was going to happen.

"Girl meets guy, they have some trouble, maybe there's another girl. Still, heroine and prettyboy end up together. Luke has to fight his dad, whose name is father, but he's still surprised. Good always wins unless it's a horror movie." Jesse's eyes get wider the more she goes on.

"You, my friend, need help. We should go watch that new movie."

Beca puts on the fakest smile she's maybe ever smiled, including that time when her dad excitedly mentioned her studying Comparative Literature in front of some of his friends. Unlike her stint in college though, she's not going to even bother getting started on this 'education'. Humming, she replies, "Mmm, we should totally not do that and instead I'll just go home and fold laundry."

Jesse shakes his head sadly. "Beca... It's magic." As he's lamenting, Beca hears laughter ringing through the store. Looking away from Jesse, she sees it's the redhead again. Her head is thrown back in glee, music book clutched to her chest. The blonde rolls her eyes and walks off with an exasperated smile. A quiet whistle sounds from beside her.

"Wow, she's pretty, huh Becs?" Jesse is also looking at the redhead. Beca nods and steps away from the step ladder and boxes, all the guitars having been hung up.

"Yeah. I'm going to see if she needs anything." She puts her hand in her back pocket and jerks a thumb over her shoulder at the customer. "You got the clean-up on this?", nodding her head at the boxes beside them. Jesse smirks at her.

"Oh, I see how it is. Leave me to the slave labor while you go 'help the customer'" He puts his fingers up to make air quotations. "Okay Beca, I get it. I see what you really think of me." Beca just rolls her eyes at him.

"Thanks Jess."

Walking away, she notices that the redhead has moved from the sheet music. Beca glances toward the counter, where Cynthia Rose is organizing guitar string packages. Looking around, she spots her target by the ukuleles. She takes a subtle deep breath, shakes her hands out, and makes her way over.

"Hey, are you finding everything alright?" Her breath catches as the redhead turns around.

"Hi! Yeah, I'm good. I'm here with my friend. I'm thinking about picking up an instrument or something." The redhead nods, bouncing in place a little. Beca nods back.

"Okay, cool. Anything specific come to mind? Maybe we can get you something to try out. See if it feels right. I'm Beca, by the way." She sticks her hands back into her back pockets after she realizes that they're way too sweaty for a minute-long conversation.

"Oh yeah! Duh! My name's Chloe." Chloe shakes her head and giggles. "I don't know about playing anything right now, I only sing. Do you play any instruments?"

Beca nods. "I play a couple of things. I might be able to play an instrument for you, depending on what you're interested in. Maybe you'll like the way something sounds." She notices the blonde from earlier returning with a violin in her hands.

"Hey Chloe, what about the violin?" The blonde holds up the instrument in her hands. Chloe looks at Beca and gestures at her friend.

"Beca, this is my best friend Aubrey. Aubrey this is Beca. She works here." Aubrey nods at her and says hello. Beca waves and returns the greeting.

Chloe hums. "So, Beca, do you play the violin?" Aubrey raises her eyebrows at Chloe, but says nothing. Beca shrugs.

"Yeah, I play a little. Let me just get a spare bow from the back." She turns and heads towards the back, where the repair room is. Cynthia Rose winks at her as she passes.

"Hey Cap, looks like you're having a good time." She subtly leans her head in Chloe's direction. Beca sighs and rolls her eyes as she passes.

"You guys... do you always have to tease me?" Beca doesn't wait for a verbal response, letting Cynthia Rose's laughter suffice.

She returns to Chloe and Aubrey after digging out a recently repaired violin bow she found dumped by a book donation box. Tapping the spine on her other hand, she asks, "Ready to see if violin is for you?" Chloe's answering squeal pulls at something inside of Beca. She coughs a little to recenter herself and takes the violin from Aubrey.

"Okay, here goes nothing. Just let me know if it makes your ears bleed." She laughs shortly and places the instrument under her chin. Closing her eyes, she takes a deep breath and places the bow over the violin.

As she plays, she thinks of the emotions the music convey, what they invoke, memories that bring up those feelings. Winter in Maine with her mother, building snowmen and enjoying the sunshine. Summers in Georgia by the lake with her dad and stepmother after they finally learned to get along. That one kid who always dared her to jump from the rope swing.

The song is bright and clear, like the first melt of snow on a cloudless day in March. It sounds like new life and it's refreshing. She briefly glances at the redhead, and it's a miracle she doesn't miss a note.

Chloe is staring at her with eyes as bright as the song she's playing. She's clutching the sheet music book to her chest tightly, her bottom lip trapped under her teeth. The sight is so breathtaking that Beca feels like fresh mountain water has just been dumped on her. She glances down to focus on her playing, a warmth rolling through her like a summer wave.

When the last of the song drifts from the violin, Jesse's voice fills the silence left behind. "Is this real? Do my ears deceive me? It sounds like you're a music girl, and I'm a music guy. It must be destiny. We must be destined to have musical chi..." Beca looks away from where her eyes have been caught in Chloe's, pulled in by their gravity. Curious about why Jesse has stopped talking, she turns to look at him.

His mouth is open, and he's staring at Aubrey unblinkingly. The blonde seems perturbed and leans away from him. "Umm, are you okay?" She hesitantly waves her hand into his line of sight. He sputters.

"Uh, hi, yeah, I'm Jesse, welcome to The Music Emporium." He shuffles around and scratches his head. Beca grins at him. This was gold.

"Swanson, are you okay? You look nervous. Also a little pale. Do you need to take a dump? Because you kinda look like you need to take a dump. You're sweating a bit too." Jesse's eyes get impossibly wide and he makes a weird choking noise before quickly shaking his head.

"No, I'm good. So, um, what are you guys up to? Do you need help with anything?" He sticks a hand into his front pocket and runs the other hand through his hair, eyes quickly darting to the blonde before looking back at Beca. Her smile only gets wider. _**I can't freaking believe this. Swanson likes the blonde** , _she thinks. Her eyes wander over to Chloe, who is glancing between her friend and Jesse with a thoughtful expression on her face.

"I was just helping Chloe find an instrument she might like." Beca nods her head in Chloe's direction. Chloe stares at Jesse as he shifts from foot to foot. Suddenly, her eyes glint and she smirks. Shifting over to Beca, Chloe loops an arm through hers and gently tugs her closer.

"Yeah, I think Beca is going to help me look at some guitars next. Aubrey could use some help looking at something else though." Turning to look at Aubrey, whose expression seems like she's about to vomit, Chloe asks, "Aubs, why don't you tell Jesse here all about what you were looking for?" With that, she tugs Beca away.

Leaving the two behind to sputter awkwardly at each other, Chloe giggles quietly. Beca shakes her head. "Jesse isn't too bad, I promise. He's just weird."

Chloe huffs. "Aubrey has been trying to set me up on blind dates forever, even though I tell her I'm not interested. This is just payback with the possibility of it ending positively for everyone." Beca laughs.

"Oh trust me, I get it. Swanson teases me whenever a woman asks for my help in here." She subtly exhales when Chloe doesn't react other than a slight raising of her eyebrows and a little nod.

"No lucky person in your life then, Beca?" Beca shakes her head.

"Nah, I just haven't found someone that feels right. I'm not interested in casual dating, y'know? I'd rather have fun and fool around with my forever person. More good memories." Chloe's eyes are bright.

"But how will you know if you don't do a trial run?", Chloe asks.

Beca studies the guitars in front of them, looking for a good balance between starter and quality. "I think, you don't know right away, but something always pulls you to them. The things that are meant to be, happen no matter how hard we try to fight it." She spots a decent one and reaches down to pull it from the rack.

Turning to Chloe, she offers it to her. "Wanna try?"

Chloe backs away with a small laugh. "I have no musical talent outside of singing, Beca." Beca lets out an echoing laugh.

"How are you ever going to learn if you aren't going to pick one up?" She teases the redhead before relenting. "Okay, how about I play for you, and you can join me in singing? That way you'll hear how awesome it'd be if you had guitar accompaniment."

Chloe nods. "Yeah, that sounds good."

"Cool. Do you know 'Titanium', by David Guetta?", Beca asks. Chloe scoffs in response.

"Have I been living under a rock? Yeah, that song is my jam." Chloe winks at her. "My lady jam." Beca blushes as Chloe throws her head back and laughs.

Beca shakes her head. "Dude, that's nice, but I _so_ didn't need to know that." She pulls up a stool for them each. "Let's do this. Ready?" The redhead smiles and hums at her, also sitting. Beca plucks the strings, gently adding her voice into the stripped down version of the song. She looks up at Chloe, nodding for her to join in.

This time, as Beca's eye connect with Chloe, she actually does miss a note. She recovers quickly, but the sound of Chloe's voice has a firestorm erupting in her belly. The goosebumps that cover her arms must be painfully noticeable, but she can't perceive anything beyond Chloe and the way her singing is manipulating her.

They don't even get through the song, instead just staring at each other. At some point, they've drifted closer. Beca is leaning over the guitar, one foot on a rung and the other on the floor. Chloe has her hands pressed onto her thighs, at the edge of her seat. Beca notices her eyes dart down before coming back up. Without thinking, she moves the guitar off of her lap and leans forward.

Before they can get any further, Beca's phone chimes loudly, startling them both. Chloe blushes lightly and clears her throat while Beca laughs in what she feels like is a terribly awkward manner, as much as she tries to tone it down to just 'kinda-barely' awkward.

"So uh, yeah, that's what it'd sound like if you played the guitar and sang. Pretty nice, I think. You've got an okay voice. A nice voice. A lovely voice, I mean." Chloe giggles.

"Totes. It was great. You've got an amazing voice as well, Beca." Beca rubs the back of her head. "Thanks. Um. Are you- do you- d'you want to see about any other instruments?" She bites her tongue to keep from stuttering out more awkwardness.

Chloe shakes her head. "I need to think it over a little, but guitar feels like what I might decide on. You should tutor, by the way. You're really good." Beca laughs.

"I'm alright, but I'll tutor you if you want. Just let me know when you're free."

The redhead smiles at her. "Is that your way of asking for my number?" Beca shrugs. "Maybe, but I think everybody wins. If it goes well, we get to know each other better. If it fails, then you still pay me." Chloe's resounding laughter brings a smile to the brunette's face.

"Fair enough." Chloe smirks and pulls out her phone.

After they exchange numbers, they walk up to the counter, where Jesse and Aubrey are talking with Cynthia Rose. The trio look at them as they approach. Aubrey has an eyebrow quirked, studying them, and Cynthia Rose can't hide the smirkiest of all smirks she's ever smirked. Jesse looks lost but hopeful. Beca claps her hands together to break them out of whatever thoughts they might be individually having.

"Alright, so, just come back if you decide to get a guitar, and we'll set you up with a good one. All guitars come with replacement strings, since a lot of people touch them before they're actually bought." She smiles at Chloe, pointedly ignoring everyone else.

Chloe purchases the music book, and mentions possibly taking guitar lessons from her soon. After a promise to buy musical instruments from only them, she leaves with Aubrey. Beca sighs and clicks her fingers on the counter, tapping out a private beat. A low hum from Cynthia Rose draws her attention.

"So, I didn't know you were offering guitar lessons now, Beca. How much are you charging? Or is the price something only a certain redhead can pay?" Cynthia Rose rasps out around the gigantic smirk that has made its way back onto her face. Beca grits her teeth at her, the responding smile looking borderline painful. A quick glance at Jesse only promises more annoyance.

"I'm so proud of you, Becs. You're growing up so fast." He places a hand on her shoulder, acting like she's just won an award. She shrugs his hand off, rolling her eyes. Trying to change the subject, she pulls out her phone.

"Whatever guys. You're all jealous. Anyways, I just got a text from Ashley. She says she needs someone to fill in for music at the bar. What are you guys doing later?"

Cynthia Rose shakes her head. "I'm down. Not doing anything else later." She looks at Jesse, who nods at her before turning to Beca.

"Same here. I'll even scream your name so you can get used to being a celebrity. He tucks his hands into his armpits and mimics a chicken. "Be-CAW!"

Everyone laughs as Beca lightly punches his arm. She texts Ashley back to let her know that she'd perform that night, thoughts of a certain redhead on her mind.

* * *

Beca sits at the end of the bar with Jesse and Cynthia Rose, watching the hustle and bustle around her. The house band is playing something jazzy in nature. It's lively but relaxed.

At a nearby table, Flo is serving drinks, laughing with the patrons. A well-dressed man tries obviously to flirt with her while his friends giggle at the interaction. She politely puts her hand onto his shoulder and shakes her head, to which he places his hands over his heart like he's been shot. The raucous laughter draws the attention of some surrounding tables.

"Flo's as popular as ever, I see.", Jesse mentions as he takes a sip of his beer. Cynthia Rose holds up her tall glass. "I'll say. She's as popular as Stacie, but without the intimidating raw sex appeal." Beca nods.

Flo makes her way over, casually greeting people at the other tables. Upon reaching the bar, she places her things on the bar top and wipes it down with her rag. "That guy always asks for my number. I think I've said no ten times now. Back in my country, asking more than three times would be a death sentence. My brothers would have unleashed vipers on his house." She continues wiping the counter as Beca chokes on her beer. Jesse nods like the response was normal and mutters something about keeping reptiles off of airplanes.

Just as Beca's recovering from inhaling liquids, arms encircle her head and force it into rather generous cleavage. She flails as Cynthia Rose laughs in the background. Beca's cry for assistance is muffled in bosom. "Don't just laugh, CR! Help me!" She reaches out, but is only met with air.

After she frees herself, she comes face to face with the owner of her would-be suffocaters. Stacie's brilliant smile does little to dull the trauma. As Stacie opens her mouth, a loud and exuberant Tasmanian accent cuts in. "Hey Shawshank! Are you ready for round two for wrestlin' with lady parts?" Fat Amy opens her arms wide and shakes her chest at Beca. Leaning against the bar top roughly, Beca's eyes go wide and she puts her hands up in self-defense.

"Dude! No!" The group laughs.

"Eh, shame, that. You're missing out on the good stuff. Legs has got nothing on this. Sorry Legs." Amy waggles her eyebrows and Stacie shrugs good-naturedly. Jesse laughs and Stacie speaks again now that Beca has been suitably harassed.

"Becs, I hear you're performing tonight!" A round of low cheers passes through the group and Beca nods but rolls her eyes.

"I'm just playing the guitar and singing a couple of songs, no big deal. Ashley needed a fill-in last minute because the entertainment that she had to support the house band ducked out." She sips her beer and continues. "Though I hear that good things are happening for you. Tell us about it." Stacie looks at her, knowing she's changing the subject, but answers anyway.

"Yeah, it looks like we've gotten enough funding to take on the next project. I think that this will definitely take the research lab to the next level in terms of renown." Fat Amy returns with an obnoxiously pink drink with a fuzzy umbrella.

"What is it that you do exactly, Legs? 'Cause I know your brain is bigger than your jugs, and your jugs are big." She hums contentedly as she sips what Beca assumes must be a fruity drink, judging from the umbrella and the color.

"We do research and engineering on medical and biochemical technologies. Last year we were working on more resilient bionic arms and incorporating natural electricity. We hit a couple of snags as far as receptive materials, but are positive that with continued experimentation, we'll be able to develop a machine that nobody has seen before." Several pairs of eyes widen, not quite used to Stacie speaking seriously. Beca grins.

"Careful Stace, you might break some people with your brain power. I already smell some short circuiting going on." She and Stacie laugh. Fat Amy speaks up from around her drink.

"Oi, you're the only one that's short, Shawshank. Stop trying to lump us in together, yeah?"

In the middle of more teasing, Ashley slides over from behind the bar and taps Beca. Everyone greets her as Beca turns. "Hey Ash."

"Becs, you're on about 15 minutes after this last song." Beca nods and smiles at Ashley. Stacie leans over her shoulder to address Ashley.

"You're looking hot tonight. Waiting for something spicy to walk by?" She grins as the brunette blushes prettily, shrugging a shoulder. "Maybe."

The group erupts with excitement. Stacie pushes Beca aside to place both of her hands on the bar top and speaks over Beca's protests. "Whaaaat? Spill, girl. Give Mama Stace all of the deets."

"Just a friend, but I think maybe it could be more. Her name's Jessica." Fat Amy polishes off her drink and places it on the counter.

"What's she look like, eh? Is she as hot as this Tasmanian Lightning?" Ashley laughs fully and shakes her head.

"Nobody is as hot as you, Amy, but she's really pretty. She's blonde, little shorter than I am." A loud group to their side interrupts with cheers as a duo drains their glasses with gusto. They wave Flo over for more drinks. With that, Ashley departs to go check on the band and manage the bar. Stacie mentions hunting and stalks after a tall brunet, disappearing into the crowd.

Jesse sighs and holds his beer like a microphone, crooning into it. " _Loove is in the air, toniggghhhtttt. The peace the eveeening bringggsss._ " Cynthia Rose Joins in with instrumental vocals as Fat Amy takes some lyrics. Beca's sigh just adds to the mood of the song, as much as she tries to kill it.

Before long, they have a little group of patrons surrounding their impromptu karaoke sesh, and since the band has finished playing, they serve as the entertainment, drawing more people to the bar. When the songs are done, Jesse nudges her towards the raised stage and everyone bolsters her with cheers.

"Hahaha, hi everyone. So I guess I'm doing introductions a little late since I've already started performing." A few people cheer and she winks into the crowd at them. She feels relaxed as the couple of drinks she's had loosen her up. "Thanks guys, you're not so bad either." She chuckles at the wolf whistles.

Beca grabs an acoustic-electric guitar and settles herself in front of the mic. As she's adjusting things and checking the sound, she says, "So, I'm Beca, and I'm gonna give the awesome house band a little break. If you recognize any of these songs, feel free to sing along. Or don't. You can just keep drinking." Some laughter rifles through the crowd, and Stacie catcalls loudly. Beca smirks, then it turns into a bit of a grimace as Jesse screeches out a "BECAW!" from the back. She leans into the microphone, looking in his direction. "Yeah, fuck you too." He shrieks a scream of adoration in response.

She takes a deep breath, adjusts herself slightly, and launches into a song. It's a country pop piece, and immediately there are a few takers on the singing offer. For the most part though, it's as quiet as a bar on a Friday night can get.

Beca rolls through a few more songs, performing for about an hour after several shouts for encores rope her back in. Finally though, she bows out as the saxophonist for the band jumps in to save her, blasting out 'Careless Whisper' and taking the crowd's attention away.

The brunette retreats to the bathroom. As she's making her way back, she's ensnared by a familiar pair of blue eyes and what Beca can only describe as perfectly tousled red hair. Her sight is drawn down to red lips. They pull into a smirk, alerting her that she's been caught out.

"Like something you see?" Chloe's black dress hugs in all the right places, pushing her cleavage up. Her heels put her a good six inches taller since Beca's in her Chucks. She sidles up and leans against the wall.

If she was fresh out of high school, she'd be incredibly awkward and probably choke on air before making a weirdly flirtatious insult. But she's older now, a reasonably mature adult-like person, who's comfortable with herself, kinda. So this evolved Beca just mirrors Chloe's stance and glances back down at a bottom lip that's nestled under white teeth. "Maybe I do. What are you gonna do about it?"

She can tell Chloe is pleasantly surprised from the light blush she can just barely spot in the lighting from the hallway leading to the bathrooms. Flustered, Chloe replies, "I'll demand free guitar lessons from you." Beca laughs and straightens up.

"Join me for a drink?" She jerks her thumb in the direction of the bar. Chloe nods and they settle in a booth. After insisting that Beca try something that she'll surely love, the redhead orders something that sounds like a vacation getaway package. "I bet this will have an umbrella in it."

Chloe shrugs. "Probably. What are the stakes?" Beca eyes her.

"If I'm right, you come in tomorrow for some music lessons, free of charge. I really want you to try out the guitar for yourself," she says as Chloe rests her head on her fist.

"And if I win?" The brunette shrugs at that.

"I dunno. Didn't you want free guitar lessons anyways? What do you want?" She pulls out a candy wrapper, a dollar bill, and some pocket lint and puts it on the table between them. "You can have this stuff. I'll be famous someday, apparently. This might be worth something." Chloe laughs and Beca grins cheesily. "Hey, Beca Mitchell's pocket lint will rival Elvis's used gum." The laughter gets louder.

"No thanks, I'm not weird enough to think such mundane things will be worth much. Besides, fame isn't all it's cracked up to be." Beca arches an eyebrow.

"Am I talking with a secret celebrity?" Chloe shakes her head.

"No, but my college a capella group won the national title my senior year." Beca leans forward, excitement written all over her face.

"I would never have pegged you for such a nerd. This is awesome. You're not cool at all. I feel so mislead." Her grin widens as the redhead smacks her arm.

"I, Chloe Beale, am not a nerd. Aubrey and I are cool and talented. Don't be jealous." Beca barks out a laugh. "Your friend from the music store was in the a capella group too?" At Chloe's nod, she laughs again.

"So what are your redeeming qualities? Because that kind of group singing takes away a ton of cool points. I don't know if you can come back from that kind of embarrassment."

Chloe shrugs. "Hey, I saw the tail end of your karaoke at the bar with your friends from work. That's basically what the Barden Bellas did, y'know." Beca goes quiet as she processes this information.

"Whatever, I'll bet you guys wore flight attendant outfits or something," she mumbles. Thankfully, their drinks arrive to save Beca from facing the reality of the trap she set up for herself. There's no umbrella in it.

"So, about that bet... can I get a raincheck?" Beca takes a sip and is pleasantly surprised that, even though it's fruity, it isn't cloying. Chloe hums in response around her own drink.

"Nope. But I haven't thought of anything yet, so we'll see what you have to do." The brunette groans at her.

"Anyways, what redeeming qualities do you have? I'm still not convinced." Beca is curious about what Chloe will say.

"Well, I speak Russian, and you already know I sing pretty well. I actually offer vocal lessons." She winks at Beca, who blushes around a nod. "Aubrey sings really well too. She can shoot a gun, and is a good enough lawyer that she can probably get herself out of any crime she might cause with that skill." She shrugs. "I also know my way around a car and a paintbrush. I'll let you know if I think of any other ways that I'm awesome." Beca chuckles and shakes her head.

"You're so humble, Beale."

As they trade stories and information, Beca tells Chloe that she shares an apartment with Jesse, but he spends a lot of time at Benji's house. The knowledge that she hates movies isn't met with the usual exaggerated disbelief but she still gets a surprised laugh.

"Are there no movies you like? What about _The Notebook_?" Beca rolls her eyes.

"I cried, but only because everybody who has ever seen that movie cries. I'm pretty sure even rocks cry if you put them in front of it. That doesn't mean I liked it, though. Just that I was forced to cry by some universal law." The redhead laughs at that, promising to find a movie that she likes.

"So tell me about all of your friends. How did you meet them?" Chloe's eyes are bright, but her posture is a little more relaxed than when they first sat down. She's on her second fruity mystery. Beca is just over halfway through hers, trying to pace herself after her other drinks.

"Jesse and I grew up with Stacie, who is somewhere in here but disappeared to go find a flavor for the night, or something." Chloe raises her eyebrows but remains silent, knowing Beca is still talking. Beca just smirks at her and continues.

"Anyways, she went to Stanford for engineering and runs a research lab a little ways outside of L.A.. Jesse and I went to college in New York for about a minute, then we decided to come cut our teeth on life out here. We both did random jobs, then ended up at The Music Emporium, where we met Cynthia Rose. We met Ashley through her, who owns this bar, and Flo is one of her bartenders and Cynthia's best friend." Beca pauses as she tries to think of a way to describe Amy. "And Amy, everyone calls her 'Fat' Amy, well... Let's just say she came in like a wrecking ball, and never left. She's great though." Chloe laughs suddenly in disbelief. "She got me arrested once." At Chloe's look, the brunette decides to take a sip of her drink and change the subject.

"Now your turn. Tell me about your sordid past and which one of your friends is a criminal. I'll bet Aubrey was a drill sergeant. She gives off that vibe. Plus she's a lawyer." She smirks at Chloe, who bites her lip in response. Butterflies start swirling low in her belly at the sight.

"Well, I grew up in Miami, and went to Barden University with Aubrey. I studied Russian and Russian Lit, we were in the Bellas all four years and our senior year, we won the ICCAs. After that, we moved out here to L.A.. Aubrey and I room together. We met our friend Jessica here in California after Aubrey stress vomited on her car after an accident." Beca makes a 'yikes' face at the mention of vomit. "The rest, as they say, is history. Jess actually wanted us to come out tonight to meet someone she's interested in. She wasn't really specific about it though."

That gets Beca's attention. "Wait, is Jessica blonde?" Chloe nods, brow furrowed.

"Yeah, how did you know?" The brunette leans forward.

"Because my friend Ashley mentioned a pretty blonde that she was interested in by the same name, who was supposed to be coming by tonight. What are the chances?" They both grin at the revelation and head towards the bar in search of their friends.

They're all seated at the corner of the bar and the nearest high table, keeping them grouped in a rough circle. Beca spots Ashley leaning over the bar top, talking closely with a blonde woman. Turning slightly towards Chloe who's walking behind her, she steps closer to speak in her ear. "Is that Jessica?"

Chloe's subtle inhale surprises Beca, who was focused intently on her friend's potential love life. She leans back a bit to assess her drinking buddy. She ends up swallowing loudly and biting her lip at the vision in front of her.

Chloe's hair is a little more tousled than before, but it only adds to the attraction. Her icy blue eyes contrast the red, looking like lighthouses in the dark. She follows the line of Chloe's throat after briefly stopping to admire red lips and is drawn downwards. She clears her throat and looks up, noticing that Chloe's been pointedly looking at her friend while chewing her lip.

"Don't stare so hard," she mutters, "Or I might do something impulsive." Beca's heart jumps into her throat at the same time that her stomach drops to her feet. She decides to be bold.

"Oh yeah? I dare you." Chloe's quick to snap her head back, eyes bright and sharp.

They're already so close, they can't get much closer without it being physical contact. Beca mutters, "Call me crazy, but I feel like you want to do something. And I know we just met, but I feel like I'm thinking the same thing." Her eyes flicker from Chloe's to her lips. Chloe nods just a bit, already tilting her head down.

"SHAWSHANK! WE NEED YOU. HURRY!" Amy's voice pierces through the haze that has surrounded them, and Beca growls throatily and she shuts her eyes in frustration.

"Damn it, that's twice now. I need new friends." Chloe chuckles breathily and runs a hand through her locks, the dusting of a blush evident in the low lighting.

"They've got great timing." Beca rolls her eyes at Chloe's words.

"If by great, you mean 'terribly inconvenient and only made worse by the fact that they constantly tease me over every aspect of my life', then yes. Great." The brunette starts walking over to the group, muttering about going before she's kidnapped.

"Okay you heathens, what do you want? This had better be good." Flo laughs and pats her shoulder while Jesse smiles widely. It's Amy who leans across the table and answers though.

"Weeeee... need you to play that song for us. It's important. Matter of national importance, that." The blonde is intoxicated, and sways slightly. Beca stares in confusion until Cynthia Rose pushes a yellow plastic cup towards her. It's the one Ashley kept her pens in before she switched to something more official. Among the usual group, there are also Chloe's friends Aubrey and Jessica, who is listening in but keeping an eye out for Ashley as she works the bar. Beca's eyes widen and she sucks her lips into her mouth.

"Must you bring this up again? How many different ways can I say no? Will it work if I put a resounding 'hell' in front of it? Maybe a 'fuck'?" There are several boos from the group. Surprisingly, Aubrey is the one to goad her.

"C'mon Beca, I've been hearing about this 'cup song' for the last thirty minutes. Everyone is saying it's amazing, but how good of an instrument can a cup be?" She smirks, knowing that it'll bother Beca.

"Just as good as making music only with your mouths. I'll show you." She snatches the cup off of the table, glaring. "I know you're just manipulating me into performing for you like a trained monkey, but it's working. I'm still going to resent it though." She positions the cup and starts clapping, effectively cutting everyone off as they listen.

Like every other time she's noticed Chloe while singing, her eyes are drawn over. Try as she might to resist, she can't. She finds that she doesn't want to fight it as much as she feels like she should. Her body is flooded with a warmth, and she notices that it adds a pleasant mellowness to her song.

When she finishes singing, she slams the cup back on the table before swatting it at Amy, who makes a whale sound as she tries in vain to dodge it. She goes down with a yell about being shot, reaching up from under the table to grab her drink. Cheers surround her and Stacie comes up from wherever she was to put an arm on her shoulder.

"Damn, Becs, that brings back memories. That was almost as good as you rapping." Beca scoffs, but out of the corner of her eye, she notices how intensely Chloe is staring at her.

"Okay, okay, enough performing. Somebody's buying me a drink, and then I'm going back to my corner. I'm sick of you guys." Beca's smile belies her words. Jesse brings over a couple of beers for her and Chloe. After she thanks him, Beca holds her hand out and pulls Chloe away from the group, amidst childish catcalls.

As they resettle at a small table, the brunette looks up at Chloe. "You've been kinda quiet. You okay?" Chloe nods.

"I think I found what I want as my prize, Beca." Beca hums curiously.

"What is it?"

"Rap for me." Beca spits her beer back into the bottle mid-sip, muttering about how gross backwash is.

"All of the things you could pick in this world, Beale, and you pick that?" The redhead smirks.

"Totes. I plan to collect before the night is over, or my prize doubles."

Beca sighs exasperatedly. "I could totally just ignore you for the rest of my life, you know. I'll just get a different job." Chloe laughs and then whines.

"That's no fun! C'mon Beca, don't be a wimp." Beca's look leaves no doubt that she can see through Chloe's plan.

They talk for a few more hours before they notice the group has dissipated. Only a few are left. Jessica is sitting at the bar with Ashley, Flo is picking up discarded cups and bottles. Amy departed an hour ago, mentioning snagging a dingo. Beca asks Chloe about how she's getting home if Aubrey left already. Jesse is napping with a half-empty beer bottle.

"I'll just call a cab. You're seriously running out of time to rap for me, by the way. Don't think I won't hunt you down and get double," she laughs as they walk outside. Beca waves to their friends and chuckles quietly. "You asked for it, Beale."

Gearing up, she starts rapping the lyrics to 'No Diggity _'_. Her courage being fueled by the alcohol she's had throughout the night, Beca gets a little sassy with it and flicks a strand of Chloe's hair. The redhead crinkles her nose and laughs at the antics.

When she drops into the singing, Chloe chews on her lip and leans against the building. Beca sees the cab approaching and decides to bring the song to a close. They start to head over to the cab, Beca grabbing Chloe's hand and swinging it between them. Chloe speaks.

"I had fun tonight. I wasn't expecting to see you again so soon. I thought I'd have to buy a guitar first." Beca laughs at that.

"Yeah, me neither. Must be fate though. What are the chances that your friend and my friend met earlier and were interested in each other? They really seemed to hit it off, by the way," Beca observes. Chloe agrees.

"Maybe some things are just meant to happen?" Icy blue eyes connect with dark ones.

"It seems to be that way. Maybe more than one thing was destined tonight." Beca winks. "Like my awesome rapping. Which, I totally deserve a reward for, by the way." The redhead laughs and leans down.

As they stand in front of Chloe's cab, the air around them thickens. "You totes deserve a reward. What do you want?" Chloe's eyes are on her lips, and she's completely unsubtle about it. Beca hums quietly.

"I think, I really want to kiss you." Chloe nods and closes the distance between them.

Beca has never been on fire before, but she guesses that what she's feeling now is pretty close. There's a wild heat, liquid and roaring, pouring down and rushing around. Suddenly there's no air and too much air and she feels lightheaded. Unthinkingly, she places her hand on Chloe's hip as Chloe threads a hand through her hair, anchoring them.

She believes in fate and destiny, soulmates and twin flames, but she didn't think that she would really be a part of such magic. What she's experiencing right now though? It definitely feels like all of the corny stuff she would have gagged at in high school. It definitely feels like magic.

Just as she's about to swipe her tongue across Chloe's lips, they hear a cough from inside the cab.

"Uh... guys, are you going to get in, or what?" The cab driver, an older gentleman in his 50's, seems slightly uncomfortable at being made an unwilling participant in this moment.

Chloe sighs breathily, a dreamy "Yeah, I'll be right there..." floating out. Beca groans at how cute the redhead looks. "Was that a good enough reward?" Beca's smile turns into a smirk.

"I don't know, I might have to think it over. We might possibly even have to have a redo." Chloe grins blindingly.

As she gets settled into the cab, she turns back to look through the open window. "Call me, Beca. We're definitely going to have to redo it. If you aren't a hundred percent sure, then we'll just need to work on it until it's perfect." Beca has to bite her cheek to stifle the grin that threatens to take over her entire face.

Making a completely cheesy 'I'll call you' motion with her hand and pointing at Chloe, she backs away and waves as the cab pulls from the curb.

While she's daydreaming, Jesse sidles up to her. Stumbling a bit, he plops his elbow onto her shoulder. "You liiiikkeee herrrr." He starts humming 'Can You Feel The Love Tonight' again. Beca rolls her eyes.

"Dude, you're drunk." He nods, then shakes his head.

"I'm not drunk, you're just blurry."

Beca laughs and starts dragging him along, complaining about how fat he's gotten. He makes some remarks about her being unnaturally tiny.

Beca doesn't know exactly how destiny works, but she thinks that maybe she's stumbled upon something promising.

* * *

 **AN: The Lion King - Can You Feel The Love Tonight (Lyrics are slightly different from Elton John's version)**


	2. Day 4

Beca wakes up with a ringing in her ears again, but she's much calmer and not sweating. She checks the time, relieved to find that she isn't going to be late today.

She has the time to make her bed and shower, humming 'Hakuna Matata' from _The Lion King_. After the night in the bar, she's had Disney songs stuck in her head for the last three days. She spits out some suds that have drifted down her face and moves onto another song.

Coming into the kitchen in a red and black plaid shirt and jeans, she spots Jesse sitting at the counter with Benji, digging into some bacon and coffee. She nods at them and makes herself a cup, inhaling the rich scent and letting the warmth seep into her bones. Say what she might about Jesse, he sure knew how to get good coffee and coax the best flavor from it.

"What are you guys up to today? I know we're closing early and you aren't even coming in, Jesse." He nods at that, taking a large drink of his coffee to wash down the eggs and bacon stuffed in his mouth. Beca notices that Benji has a pancake, but sees no evidence of pancakes having been made.

"Benji and I are just gonna go catch that movie that you refuse to see with us. Since my childhood friend has forsaken me, y'know." Beca laughs and agrees. "Yeah dude, you're pretty boring. I might have to get a houseplant to liven this party up." She begins to pile food onto her plate, digging into the fridge for some fruit to add to it. At Jesse's look of disbelief, she smirks.

"Yeah, we can't all live off of coffee and popcorn like you." Jesse maintains a serious expression as he adds, "and sarcasm. Don't forget the most important part." She rolls her eyes and nods.

Benji sits up. "What time does the store close, Beca?" Beca hums. She shovels food into her mouth, mumbling about a few things at work she wants to get done.

"Like 2 PM. I might leave earlier if it's not too busy. Anyways, I'll see you guys later after you go do boring and regrettable things. I'd say 'make good choices' but you're going to watch a movie, so..." Beca finishes off her plate and rinses it in the sink. With a couple of fist bumps, she's out the door.

It's only a short distance to the store, so she decides to walk slowly and enjoy the California sunshine. Her phone vibrates in her pocket. She pulls it out and sees it's a text from Chloe asking about her schedule for the day. Beca sends a morning greeting, following it up with the fact that the shop is closing early.

Beca strolls into work, her head in her phone. She and Chloe have been texting almost constantly, even while she's working, when she can get away with it. Upon noticing that it's strangely quiet, she looks up, searching for Cynthia Rose. A shadow passes to her left and she shrieks before reaching out to left hook it as it goes by. Preparing to launch something else, she's immensely relieved to see that it's only Lilly.

"Geez Lilly. Give a girl a heart attack, why don't you..." Lilly whispers about the weak not surviving and Beca can only nod in response, not entirely sure what was said.

She decides to spend the day setting up the rest of the new inventory. They're not too busy so it's more relaxed than usual. As Beca disposes of the boxes, she receives another text from Chloe asking if she's still at work. Beca responds in the affirmative, and when she walks out from the storage room, she spots the redhead standing just inside the entrance scanning the store for her. The immediate smile that lights up her face upon spotting Beca makes her giggle. She coughs to cover it even though she's alone.

"Fancy meeting you here." She walks up to Chloe and sticks her hands into her back pockets, scuffing the carpet. The redhead beams and leans into her.

"Yeah, there's a pretty cool chick that said she'd teach me how to play the guitar." Beca hums.

"Do I know her? She sounds awesome."

Chloe nods. "Totes."

They lightly flirt their way over the guitars. Beca grabs an acoustic guitar and then leads Chloe to a small raised alcove used for playing. There's a couch and some stools. Chloe sits down on the couch and Beca pulls a stool over so that she can see better.

"Okay, so the way you hold it is relative to your dominant hand for most people." The redhead nods and gets positioned. Beca moves the guitar around to settle it properly, then leans back. "How does that feel? Awkward? Too big?"

Chloe winks. "That's what he said." Beca groans.

"Focus, Beale. I'm trying to teach you something here." Chloe's cute little smirk only widens.

"I could teach you something else." The brunette blushes hard.

Rubbing her knuckle across her nose, she sighs. "You're bad."

"Wanna see how bad I can get?" Chloe's laughter drowns out Beca's growl. Burying her head in her hands, Beca says, "We just met! Do you flirt with everybody like this?!"

The redhead tilts her head, plucking a string on the guitar. "Not quite like this. It's much more fun with you. I feel like a lot of things would be more fun with you." Another wink, and Beca's had it.

She surges forward, placing a hand on Chloe's knee, and presses their lips together. Chloe lets out a surprised squeak but moves the guitar out of the way, allowing Beca to move closer. She ends up settling into the couch as Beca moves to straddle her.

The brunette doesn't wait for a friend to interrupt, she doesn't wait for a middle-aged cab driver to ask another poorly timed question. When her tongue meets Chloe's lips, she's granted entrance immediately. Hands squeeze her thighs before moving up to her waist and the fire and electricity are more than she can handle. As she tastes Chloe's mouth, she's reminded of the fruity drink that ended with her rapping. The drink that won her a kiss with the same woman she's kissing now. The way that Chloe's making her feel makes her hands itch and she buries them in the redhead's hair. When she scratches her scalp, Chloe breaks away, leaning down to bite Beca's neck and stifle a little moan.

Beca feels the moan ripple through her, intensifying the ache that's been steadily building. A voice in her head tells her it's a little too soon to be going this far, she hasn't even asked Chloe out on a date yet, but for some reason the rest of her isn't listening. She yanks Chloe's head back up from its survey of her neck to reconnect their lips.

The burning is a wildfire, and the haze it's creating is thick and sticky. It feels like heated molasses, darker than honey and sweeter than sin. After a particularly hard pull on her hair, Chloe retaliates by biting the lip in front of her. Beca whimpers and mindlessly grinds down once. The redhead gasps.

"Be.. Beca." She doesn't respond, instead dropping down to Chloe's neck. The hands at her waist squeeze hard, before opening completely. "Becs." She looks up at that.

"Say it again." Chloe gives her a confused look.

"Say what? Your name? Becs-mmph!" Beca kisses her again, dropping her hands to search for the bottom of the redhead's shirt. Before she can get too far though, Chloe is firmer this time in stopping. Beca whines, but Chloe remains steadfast.

"We're in the middle of your work, Beca. And we met less than a week ago. I don't think we've known each other long enough for me to get you fired." That clears some of the lust clouding her mind. She nods, blowing out a breath and closing her eyes to calm herself down. Gritting her teeth, she rubs her hands over her face.

"Yeah, you're right. I have no idea what came over me." Chloe winks at that.

"Well, I don't know what came over **you** , but I know that **you** almost came over **me**."

Beca barks a laugh. "I wish, but no dice. Maybe after we've gone on a date, hmm?" The redhead tilts her head, a question on her face. Beca shakes her head. "The night at the bar didn't count. We met up on accident, and there were friends there."

"Okay, so, what about right now? This isn't a date?" Beca shakes her head again.

"No, this was a fortunate meeting. Dates are supposed to be kind of romantic. This is just hot." Chloe laughs.

"Then let's go on a date so that I can kiss you again. Maybe not at your work." The brunette nods.

Getting off of Chloe's lap, they try to resume the guitar lesson. Beca runs through some chords and warm-ups, stressing the importance of the latter and showing the finger placement for the former.

After about 45 minutes of practicing, Beca claps her hands. "I think that's good enough for today. I don't want you to get blisters. We'll let the callouses form naturally." Chloe nods and puts the guitar to the side.

"How much do I owe you?" She reaches for her purse, but Beca's scoff stops her.

"I think you owe me another guitar lesson. For every lesson I give you, you have to come in for another one." Chloe beams at her and bites her lip.

"Anybody ever tell you you're unbelievably cute?" Beca blushes but crosses her arms.

"I am **not** cute. I'm badass," she quips, turning her nose up at the accusation. The redhead lets loose a full laugh. "Okay, Mitchell." She gets up and presses a quick but solid kiss to Beca's lips, pulling away and tapping her nose.

"I don't know what it is about you, but you give me a good feeling." She turns to pick up her purse, missing the way Beca beams. "Show me around the store. Also, I saw this girl at the counter, but I'm not completely sure she wasn't a ghost, so will you tell me about that?"

* * *

Beca introduces Chloe to Lilly. It goes about as well as she had expected it to. Lilly rubs her hand instead of shaking it, whispering to Chloe. The redhead leans in. "I'm sorry, what?" She whispers again. This time, Chloe shakes her head.

"No, I'm not using any hairspray. Why do you ask?"

Lilly looks annoyed, and whispers frustratedly. Chloe glances at Beca, pleading for clarification. Beca feels like she's trying to read the Terms and Conditions and so she just says, "bye," loudly, tugging Chloe away. When she looks back, Lilly is gone. Beca wonders if maybe the woman really is a ghost.

* * *

Chloe hangs around until the store closes, even helping with putting things back in place that customers have relocated. Cynthia Rose stops by. "Should we be paying you, since you're working here now?" Chloe chuckles.

"I'm just helping so Beca can leave faster." She winks at Cynthia Rose, who smirks back.

"You're just trying to feel up my friend. Okay." They both laugh as the redhead pleads guilty.

As Cynthia Rose locks up, she tells them to use protection. Beca flips her off, and they get into a battle of the most creative ways to flip the bird before parting ways. Chloe suggests they go get a late lunch.

"It looks like you two get along well," Chloe says as they stand in line at a cozy café down the street. Beca nods.

"Yeah, CR is pretty cool. It might not seem like it, but she's my boss." The redhead looks slightly surprised.

"She's really chill. Awes." They move up to order. Beca stares at Chloe, who looks hesitant. "What? Is there something on my face?"

"You're ordering such hippie things. Tea and a veggie hummus wrap? Do you do yoga too?" She's expecting it, but she's still finds it in herself to be a little surprised that Chloe says yes. However, before she can launch into the teasing, images of Chloe bent in different yoga positions pummel her thoughts. She's lost in the daydream, forgetting to say something. The redhead clears her throat, looking pointedly at her.

"Uh, Becs, you gonna order something?" She leans in to whisper in Beca's ear. "Or do you want something that's not on the menu, hmm?" The brunette's sharp inhale has Chloe grinning from ear to ear. Beca growls but decides to cut her losses since the cashier is now eyeing them a little too closely.

"Right. I'll just take a coffee with a turkey BLT." She nods that, yes, she does indeed want chips and everything on the sandwich. Of course it needs extra bacon. Chloe just laughs.

They get settled at a table on the patio to wait for their food. Beca takes her phone and keys out of her pockets and set them off to the side, opposite her coffee. She notices the redhead staring at her with her bottom lip tucked under her teeth. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"That guy was totes checking you out, Becs." At Beca's firm head shake, she insists. "He so was! I thought his eyes were going to fall out of his head after I was done whispering in your ear."

"Well then, it's your fault. Don't say things like that when other people are around." She doesn't look the least bit repentant, so Beca leans forward a bit and puts a hand on the table between them. "If I can't act on it, don't offer it." Her tone has Chloe blushing lightly.

"Boo, teasing is so much fun though. I find that it really... heightens the experience." The accompanying wink has Beca's insides twisting. A waitress puts the food down, cutting off Beca's remark. They decide to cool off and focus on eating. The silence is companionable.

Halfway through, as Beca is chasing a bite of her sandwich with some coffee, she catches sight of Chloe. The redhead has a bit of avocado on the side of her finger, and she raises her hand to her mouth to lick it off. As she's doing so, she notices Beca staring. She winks, going from simply licking the side of her finger to curling her tongue around it briefly, sucking on the tip. Beca groans and faceplants on the edge of the table. Chloe's laughter rings in her ears.

"What's wrong, Becs?" Beca picks her head up to glare and bark out a retort, but blanks as she notices Chloe is still lightly biting her finger, attempting to kill her with another wink.

"You're terrible, woman." The redhead hums.

"Mmm, I don't think that's true." Beca disagrees.

"It is definitely true. You're terrible. And gross." Chloe stares, an eyebrow arched. The brunette picks up her coffee, attempting to stay committed to her BS.

"I think you're just upset that it wasn't you I was sucking on." Beca turns to the side just in time to avoid spitting out her coffee on table, instead spraying the ground. She wipes her mouth as Chloe leans back in her chair, holding her stomach while she laughs throatily. Her breath catches at the way the sun glints off of Chloe's hair. The redhead wipes her eyes, looking back up at Beca, the remnants of a beaming smile lingering on her lips. She tilts her head at the brunette. "Hi there." Beca smiles softly.

"You're something else." Chloe wrinkles her nose.

"Something good?" The brunette nods.

"Yeah. Definitely."

* * *

It's about 6 in the afternoon, and Beca isn't ready to end the day just yet, even if they've spent roughly seven hours together already. They're walking along the beach now, just enjoying the ocean breeze. She turns to Chloe, who is gazing off at the horizon. Beca nudges her.

"Hey, so, I don't know if you've gotten tired of me yet, we've been hanging out all day." Chloe turns, and Beca is severely unprepared for the sight.

The wind off the ocean is blowing Chloe's hair to the side, and some of the strands dance across her face. The late day sun makes her hair glow and the ocean behind her seems dull in comparison to the blue of her eyes. She exhales, realizing that at some point, she'd stopped breathing. This also alerts her to the fact that she hadn't even noticed that the redhead was speaking. She clears her throat. "Um. Sorry, can you say that again? I had, like, tunnel vision or something." She scratches the back of her head.

"I said, 'no, I'm not tired of you,' silly. Where'd you go just now?" Chloe curls some of the wayward hair behind her ear. **_I went to heaven_** , the brunette thinks cheesily. Chloe smirks. "You're kinda zoning out again." Beca shakes her head.

"You're really distracting. If you don't mind hanging out at the bar, I sometimes help Ashley set up. Do you want to come with? You get a free drink." Chloe laughs.

"I won't say no to a free drink. You've already gotten my number though. I think we might be working backwards." The brunette grunts.

"No, we're definitely not. We didn't start out in bed, so... nope." She pops the 'P', looking down at her phone to avoid Chloe's heated perusal of her body. When it gets a little too warm, she glances back up quickly.

"Your eyes are laser beaming me, dude." The redhead's stare lessens, but she redirects the energy into a smirk.

"I don't think you really mind. You weren't complaining earlier when I had my to-" Beca coughs loudly, looking around to see if anyone was listening in. Chloe rolls her eyes and strolls ahead of her, singing loudly about feeling like a virgin, while Beca tries to follow without making it look like they knew each other.

* * *

They slowly make their way to Ashley's bar, debating different songs and the merits of each genre. It feels a little like discussing why movies suck with Jesse, but Chloe actually has good points. Along the way, their hands have drifted together. Beca doesn't point it out because she doesn't want to acknowledge that she's enjoying it, knowing the redhead will tease her into possibly doing something that she isn't entirely comfortable with getting up to in public.

Upon entering the bar, she notices that there are already some patrons inside, signaling that she's a little late to help out. Still, she goes over to the counter with Chloe, who spots Jessica at the edge. The blonde has her head cradled in her hand, nursing a drink as she stares longingly at Ashley. She is unaware of the duo. Beca leans in to whisper in Chloe's ear as they wait for a bartender.

"She looks so smitten, dude." Chloe nods, lips pulling into a small smile.

"It's totes cute. I've never seen her like this before." A bartender comes over, recognizing Beca. They get a couple of margaritas. Even though he tells her it's on the house, she still pulls out some bills and forces him to take it. He smiles in gratitude.

Beca sips her drink. "I wonder how long it will be before she notices us. Especially you, what with your ginger hair and everything." She stares at the salt crystals on the edge of her glass, ignoring the look Chloe is giving her. Instead of taking the bait, the redhead merely comments on Jessica.

"I don't know if you want to stay here all night, because I don't think she's going to see anything else."

The brunette agrees. "You're right. So now, we have a choice. Do we go tease your friend, or do we hang back and just talk?" Chloe stands up, tilting her head in Jessica's direction.

"I haven't properly introduced you, aside from briefly the other night. Come on."

They walk up to the blonde, who is still obliviously staring at Ashley. Beca looks toward the other end of the bar, where she's mixing a drink and laughing with a customer. Turning back, she sees Chloe shift into Jessica's line of sight and wave. It's hard to stop the little laugh that bubbles up as the blonde jumps in surprise.

"Oh! Hi, Chloe! I didn't see you! Hi, Beca! When did you guys get here?" Chloe laughs and points out the blush on her face.

"We've been here for a while, watching you watching Ashley. You totes have a super cute blush, bee tee dubs." Amidst the denial, Beca smirks and pipes up.

"Dude, you had sparkles and hearts floating around you." They laugh harder as Jessica's blush deepens. "It's cool, I get it. Ash is quite the catch. If it helps, she acts the same way about you." Chloe gives her a look. Beca looks back, unsure of the reason. "What?"

"You think she's quite the catch, hmm? You think she's pretty?" She can tell Chloe's teasing, but also a little jealous. Beca rolls her eyes.

"She's my friend, of course I think she's pretty. I'm not interested in her though. There's a really annoying redhead that won't stop stalking me." At Chloe's shout of indignation, Jessica laughs. Ashley comes over, having finished serving the patrons for now.

"Hey Beca! Chloe, right? Nice to see you again!" As soon as she's done greeting them, Ashley turns to Jessica.

They spend a minute just staring at each other, getting all googly-eyed and other icky stuff that makes Beca think of how snarky she would have been four years ago. Old habits die hard, however, and so she has to be at least a little prickly. "You guys are so gross. Go be cute somewhere else." Ashley waves her hand dismissively, moving to use it to push Beca's face away, maintaining eye contact with the blonde.

"Pff-hey! Hands off-mmph! Dude! I'm going to bite your hand." With a squawk, Beca's pushed off her stool and Chloe reaches back to catch her, laughing at the interaction.

"Whatever, Mitchell. This is my bar. You can leave if you want." Beca doesn't have a response to that, so instead she mutters grumpily into her margarita.

Beca and Chloe hang around for a little bit longer, talking to what seems to be quickly becoming a couple. They decide to head out just as the sun finishes setting. Beca wonders about continuing the night. "So, don't take this to mean I'm trying to jump into your pants, but do you want to come over to my place?" The redhead giggles.

"Is that what you say to all the girls to get them to trust you? Does that disclaimer work?" Beca scoffs. "I don't invite everybody over, Beale. Besides, you're hot and all that, but I still think it's way too soon to just jump in bed. Even though you're really pretty. Don't flatter yourself."

Chloe winks. "I don't need to, you're flattering me plenty." Beca sucks her lips into her mouth, nodding shortly.

"Right. Okay. Sorry I asked then." She turns to quickly stride away, Chloe laughing and hurrying to catch up. The redhead loops their arms, reaching down to link their hands. Leaning her head down, she asks, "You don't want to take me home anymore?" The glare that Beca levels at her couldn't melt an ice cube.

"No. Go home by yourself. I'm taking my offer back. I don't want you to meet my toaster anyways." Beca's loathe to give up the act. Chloe hums at the news.

"Y'know, you might have been right. Maybe we _are_ moving a little too fast. Toasters? That's a big deal." Beca groans.

"I'm not asking you to move in, geez."

Remembering that she has a roommate, she pulls her phone out to text him. "Actually, let me see if Jesse is home. He might be out with Benji." Beca shudders. "Or, they could be watching a movie in the living room and try to rope us in." She fakes a gag, much to Chloe's amusement.

"I still have to find a movie you'll enjoy. But I'm stumped, since you don't like any. I'm not sure what genre I should go with. Do you like being scared?" Beca side-eyes her.

"Yes. I enjoy being scared almost as much as I would enjoy a heart attack in the middle of a cactus field. With sharks." Chloe snorts.

"Sharks and cacti live in completely different places, Beca. The sharks wouldn't survive on land." Rolling with it, Beca stays serious. "Obviously they're zombie sharks, Beale. Keep up."

"Oh, right, my bad. That's totes a logical assumption to make, that any sharks on land in a field of cacti would be reanimated. Please excuse my failure in my ability to deduce that." Her sarcasm is almost as biting as Beca's, and the thought makes the brunette smile.

"Of course. We can't all be as brilliant as I am." Chloe's scoff only makes her smile wider. Chloe mutters, griping her hand tighter.

"I can't believe I can stand next to you, with how big your head is." Beca leans in to whisper, "You should see how big my dick is."

Chloe looks properly scandalized, before bursting out in laughter. "Oh my god! I can't believe you just said that. That was **so** teenaged boy."

Upon reaching her apartment, Beca begins to slow down. Jesse hasn't responded yet, and she wasn't kidding about her lack of enthusiasm for being roped into a movie. She has a feeling that Chloe would want to "bond with your friends, Beca", and since she hasn't met Benji yet, Beca knows that she would be forced to watch the movie. As they're walking up the stairs, her phone finally pings.

"Oh thank god, they aren't watching a movie. They're in though, so you get to meet Benji," Beca states around no small amount of relief. She'd been dreading popcorn and Jesse's breathy whispers about cinema magic, and "the scoring is superb" and other things. The music would probably be the only thing she enjoys, but she never stays alert enough to appreciate it.

Unlocking the door to her apartment, she braces for an unnecessarily enthusiastic greeting from her childhood best friend. She really isn't disappointed.

"Be-CAW! You've come home to us at last! You know your schoolnight curfew is at 8 PM. And what time is it, hmm? THIRTY minutes late? Don't make us have to ground you." Beca rolls her eyes, pulling Chloe to her.

"Yeah whatever. I think you're more of a child than I am, Jesse." Ignoring his protests, she turns to Benji. "Hey Benji, this is Chloe. Chloe, Benji." She keeps the introduction short. "What are you nerds doing?"

They all decide to sit down and watch Benji's magic tricks, Chloe squealing delightedly. Beca watches her, caught up in the sparkling of her eyes. When she realizes she's been staring too long, she blinks and looks away. In the middle of it, she notices Jesse staring at her.

She furrows her brow as he shakes his head with a small smile and turns to focus back on Benji.

When the inevitable movie offer comes up, Beca's quick to shut down the idea of participating, citing the earlier hour of magic and shenanigans as enough bonding. She denies all other attempts to hang out as a group. The brunette drags Chloe off to her room, flipping Jesse off as he sings about being locked out of heaven, Benji hooting in the background.

"So yeah, traditional warning about mess. Excuse it and junk." Beca kicks a couple of things under the bed, settling onto it and telling Chloe to sit wherever. She's a little bit disappointed when Chloe picks the computer chair instead of sitting next to her. Chloe smiles gently. "It was nice hanging out with your friends. You'll have to meet Aubrey sometime." Beca nods.

"Yeah, we should all hang out as a group. Aubrey won't make us do any weird bonding exercises or anything, right? Like, nothing death-defying?" Chloe laughs.

"Why do you think she's so crazy? You barely know her." Beca shrugs. "I just have this nagging feeling. Am I wrong?" Chloe shakes her head.

"Well, not completely, but that's not the point." Beca chuckles at the admission.

"In fact, I bet she's said something about me that will only further prove me right. Go on, admit it." By now, Chloe's giggling with her.

"Okay, so she may have called your ear piercings 'monstrosities', but I promise she's nice." Beca can only laugh more. Chloe leans forward, bracing her hands on the armrests.

"Oh, come on! If someone was talking shit about Jesse, you'd defend him, wouldn't you?" Beca leans back on her hands, grinning at Chloe.

"First of all, I wasn't talking shit. Secondly, maybe. Honestly, it depends. I talk a lot of shit about Jesse myself. Really only to his face though. So, yeah, probably. But that reminds me. How does Aubrey feel about him?"

"She thinks he's got a nice face, but kinda weird. The other night at the bar, he stuttered a lot and quoted a bunch of movies. I think he's funny though. Definitely some potential, if he can calm down a bit. What are you thinking?" Chloe's leaning back in the chair, tapping a beat with her palms on her thighs. Beca looks up at the ceiling.

"I have never seen him as nervous as when he was around her. It's hilarious, but he's still my friend so I want to know if you think it could work. He may never sack up and talk to her. We'll have to intervene." Chloe nods.

"Yeah, maybe we can 'accidentally' meet up somewhere, get them used to each other, and then see about ditching them." Beca grins at that. "Sounds like a good plan."

* * *

Somehow, they end up playing Rock, Paper, Scissors, and Beca swears that Chloe is cheating.

"There's no way you can win every single time, Beale. Are you reading my mind?" Chloe laughs, wiping her eyes at Beca's stream of complaints.

"It's not my fault you're just bad at this game. And you're also really unlucky." Beca's scoff is quick and loud.

"Whatever. I _am_ lucky. This game is just rigged. You're rigging it." Chloe beams at her.

"Mhmm. And how on earth would I be rigging this?" Beca shrugs.

"It's probably like counting cards or something." The redhead arches an eyebrow in disbelief.

"So what? I'm counting hands? Fingers?" Beca nods firmly, calling her a cheater again.

Chloe flips her off. "How about you count this finger then, hmm Becs?" When the brunette tells her to stop, Chloe giggles confidently and flips her off again, daring her to make her stop. Beca wrinkles her nose to fight the smile and gets off the bed, going over to wrestle Chloe's hands down. Chloe shrieks, pulling her hands to her chest but maintaining her middle finger.

Beca ends up putting a knee on the chair to stabilize herself as they continue to grapple. Finally, Chloe gives up, tired from the struggle. She looks up at the brunette, finally noticing how close they are. Beca puts a hand on the back of the chair, the other going to run along Chloe's cheek and push some hair behind an ear. The redhead bites her lip as Beca is drawn in, sinking her hand into soft red locks, lightly gripping and connecting their lips.

She brings her other leg up to straddle Chloe as the redhead's hands move from being trapped between them to run up her back. Angling her head, she gains entrance. Chloe tastes like the strawberry candy that Benji kept materializing out of thin air. She hums her approval, pulling back to bite on a plump bottom lip. The redhead inhales sharply, whining as Beca leans back further. Hands settle on her hips.

Chloe remains otherwise silent as the brunette studies her, settling for replacing Beca's teeth with her own. Her eyes zero in on the action. Her heart is hammering loudly. There's a weird fluttering going on in her chest, and she shifts a little, feeling like she has to burp or something. The redhead, however, completely misreads her movement and squeezes her hips, tilting her head up to capture lips and they're off once again.

They're caught in a whirlwind of passion, an electric blast that feels way too deep for having just met. There's pushing and pulling, grasping and gripping. A moan rumbles low in Chloe's throat, bubbling up from her chest, mixing and ending with a gasp as Beca runs her tongue along the redhead's throat, biting the side of her neck. She presses herself closer, encouraged by Chloe's hands, and nips at her ear. Before they know it, they're tumbling over. Literally.

Lost in each other, they take no notice of how precariously the chair had been leaning back, bowed by the weight of both women pushing into it. The brunette's enthusiasm proves to be the thing that sends the chair toppling backwards.

Chloe screams, falling down as Beca goes flying over her with a wild yell and tumbling across the carpet behind them. Beca's upside down, propped against her closet door. She tilts her head along the floor to look at Chloe, who stares back from a similar position, her legs draped over the chair. Silence settles around them for a minute.

They both burst out laughing, the brunette sliding down to the side as Chloe clutches her ribs. There are tears streaming and fighting for air between the both of them. Beca eventually crawls over to Chloe, who is still lying in the same position, watching her approach with a wide smile. The redhead bites her tongue, failing to control the silly grin. "I guess you really fell for me, huh?"

Beca notices that Chloe misses the chance to wink, and so she decides to take it. She leans down to press a soft kiss to her nose, saying, "Yeah, I think I really am, Beale."


	3. Day 63

"Thank you for shopping at The Music Emporium, please stop by again!" Cynthia Rose bags a new set of headphones for a customer as Beca hangs off to the side, looking at some spreadsheets on a clipboard. She's trying to work, but between the nagging pull of a cheeseburger calling to her from somewhere and thoughts of Chloe, all of the numbers and words keep blurring. As the customer leaves, Beca sighs heavily and wanders over to slump on Cynthia Rose's shoulder.

"CR... I'm hungry." Cynthia Rose scoffs. "Cap, I told you to go eat an hour ago. Why are you still here pretending to work? I know for a fact you haven't done anything with that spreadsheet." She snatches the clipboard, mumbling to herself as she reads over the business numbers.

Jesse walks by, a mustache drawn on his face as he helps a teenager with finding a drum kit. Their hands mimic each other's as they air drum. Beca grins and snaps a quick photo, sending it off to Chloe for Aubrey.

"Sending a love letter to your girl?" Cynthia Rose teases. Beca doesn't look up, busy texting.

"I would say no, because we haven't discussed any of that yet, but also kinda yes because she's hot and I totally get to kiss her." She gets up to go help a customer waving them over, Cynthia Rose's words on her mind. As she approaches, the young woman looks up and smiles. Beca nods. "Hi, I'm Beca. What can I help you with?" The look she's getting makes her cock her eyebrow slightly.

The woman has sandy blonde hair, just past her shoulders, and gray eyes. The brunette notices her eyes darting down every now and again, but she ignores it and instead steps back a bit. She looks around to see if she can find someone else to help the blonde so that she can pretend to go work in storage until the woman leaves. Jesse is still goofing with the teenager, Cynthia Rose is with another customer, and she can't find Lilly because she might be ethereal. She has no choice but to work through it. She clears her throat, which seems to snap the blonde back to attention.

"Oh! Um, yes, I was wondering if you could help me find a good ukulele?" Her voice is pitched a tad higher than Beca believes it normally would be, and she's swaying a bit. The brunette can't help but think that this situation is a little bit like how she met Chloe, but unlike that time, she has absolutely no interest in this woman. However, she can't be rude.

"Yeah, sure. Do you play?" The blonde shakes her head. Beca nods and pulls a pen out of her pocket to rap it across her knuckles to release some nervous energy. She turns to look at where they're standing. She notices the ukuleles are the larger tenor versions. "Right. Um. Since your hands are kinda on the smaller side, I'd recommend a soprano or concert uke."

For some reason, that makes the blonde giggle. Beca subtly grits her teeth, glancing for any help. "I'm Angela, by the way. But you can call me Angie." The brunette nods at that.

"Okay Angela. So, would you like to try a ukulele?" She's praying that **Angie** will decide she doesn't want to and just leave, but **of course** she wants to.

"Yes, but would you play it for me? I'd like to hear the difference between the two you recommended." She nudges the brunette with her shoulder. Beca's afraid that if she clenches her jaw any harder, her teeth will crack.

There's nothing wrong with the blonde, but Beca is only interested in a certain redheaded stalker with a cute laugh and gorgeous smile and my god that red hair and how can freckles even be sexy but somehow Chloe manages to do that and- "Hello? Beca?" Her head snaps up at the blonde's call.

"Oh uh, sorry. Right. Um, why don't you try it first? Here." Without waiting, Beca takes the smaller soprano uke and puts in the blonde's hands, nodding for her to strum.

Immediately, Beca can tell that the blonde was lying about never having played. She holds the instrument like she was born with it in her hands. Her eyes narrow at the observation. "So, what do you think of this one?" The blonde hums.

"It feels a little small. Which one do you play? I think our hands are the same size. Let's compare them." **Angie** holds her hand out for Beca to match, but she just laughs it off and turns to reach for the next size up, pretending not to notice.

"How about this one then. This will probably be just right." She tries really hard not to shove it at the blonde.

She knows that this is the appropriate size for the blonde, but that she's trying to think of a way to prolong the interaction. She ends up strumming like the bones in her arm are made of sausages and it makes Beca visibly cringe. The blonde is also bothered by the sound, which is probably a far cry from her usual abilities. Looking back up at Beca, she hands the instrument to her. "Will you please just play something for me?" Not wanting to flat-out say no, she sighs.

Beca doesn't say anything, instead playing a simple light-hearted song, humming in place of lyrics. The blonde keeps inching closer, and Beca has nowhere else to go without climbing ukuleles. She tries to persevere. When she's done with the song, she asks, "Why are you pretending that you don't know how to play?"

The blonde's surprise is evident on her face. After some hesitation, she replies, "I wanted to hear you play, but you were being so damn difficult about it." Beca barks out a laugh, shaking her head. Then, she turns as she feels the energy in the store shift.

The air seems to settle, then swirl when her eyes connect with Chloe's. She sees a storm brewing in them, even from this distance. It feels like a hurricane on the horizon, mother nature full of fury. Beca swallows nervously as the redhead takes long strides towards her with a barely hidden scowl on her face.

Chloe stalks towards her like a lioness, wild and sleek. Upon reaching the brunette, she smoothly slides her arm along Beca's waist, leaning down to place a firm but chaste kiss to frozen lips. "Hey, baby." Her voice sounds heavy and molten, full of bedroom energy and definitely not for use in public. It pours through Beca like molten steel. It's hot and bright and blinding. Beca squeaks out a greeting, not quite sure why she feels so guilty especially since she didn't want to be there. The redhead turns to greet the customer, all that fire turning into ice and sliding over the blonde like a glacier. She looks suitably flattened.

"Hi! Welcome to The Music Emporium. I see that Beca's helping you find a ukulele. Is that one good?" At Angela's unsure nod, Chloe smiles.

"That's great! Glad to see she's doing her **job** by helping you. If that's all, she was supposed to go on a lunch break a while ago, and if she doesn't clock out soon, she's going to get penalized and we'll never hear the end of it. Have a good day!" The redhead's voice subtly increases in pitch and volume the further into the sentence she goes. Her words are as sharp and quick as they can get while staying polite.

She doesn't wait for a response, instead dragging Beca away. As she struggles to explain, Chloe keeps dragging her, passed Cynthia Rose, who is given a hasty goodbye from the redhead, through the doors of the store, and out to Chloe's white Honda Civic. The brunette takes a second to wonder if Chloe was secretly psychotic this entire time and now she was going to die.

Mid-thought, Chloe unlocks the car and, to her surprise, pushes Beca into the backseat. Chloe climbs in after, locking the doors and staring at Beca with her arms crossed. "Explain. Why was that woman looking at you like she was going to jump you at any minute?" Her eyebrow arches, daring the brunette to come with anything other than the truth.

Beca swears that she tries to answer, but concentrating became nearly impossible once she overcame her nerves long enough to really _see_ Chloe. A jealous Chloe, full of fire, eyes ablaze and demeanor so terribly prickly, was hot. She blames it on Chloe when she jumps forward and capture's the redhead's lips. Chloe lets out a muffled sound of surprise and tries to push Beca back. "Beca, I asked you a question!" She grabs Chloe and pulls the woman on top of her lap to straddle her.

"Shut up and kiss me, Beale." The redhead doesn't budge.

"Not until you answer me. Why was that, that **harlot** , looking at you that way? Why were you so close to her and laughing? Do you think she's pretty?" Beca stares.

"Did you just say harlot? What era are we in?" She laughs at the face Chloe makes at her.

"Chlo, she was just a customer, and I'm _totes_ thankful that you came and rescued me when you did because I'm yours and I don't want to flirt with anyone but you. I don't care if she's pretty or not because I like you. You were totally hot, by the way, for putting her in her place." She started off lightly, but the longer Chloe remained silent, the more nervous Beca became, until she was rambling. "Anyways, Cynthia Rose was teasing me earlier about you being mine and I figured since I just said that I'm yours, will you be mine?" She tries to fidget, but the redhead is still on top of her. "Chlo? Hello?"

It seems like Chloe's righteous fury has lessened, but the energy in the car is no dimmer. She still feels a charge building in the atmosphere around them. Beca clears her throat, brushing her nose with her knuckle. Chloe looks at her. "She said that? That I'm yours?" Beca nods.

"It was just a joke, but I wanted to talk to you about it anyways. So um, like, I really like you, and junk. Wanna go steady?" she smirks, trying to play off her nerves by putting it casually. "C'mon, Beale. I'll be yours if you'll be mine." Beca winks, feeling like there's an ocean rolling in her stomach.

Just as she's about to crack a terribly unfunny joke, Chloe puts her hand on the side of Beca's face, caressing it. The brunette leans into the touch, sensing that Chloe is having some deep feelings at the moment. Chloe rests her forehead on Beca's, chewing on her lip and moving her hand from the brunette's face to cradle her neck. Rubbing noses, she mutters, "You make me feel way too much, Mitchell."

Beca laughs softly. "Back at you, Beale." They share a kiss before Chloe pulls back, her eyes bright and glossy.

"Yes, I'll be your girlfriend." The brunette laughs.

"What? I just meant like, you want to be my steady bedtime buddy." Chloe smacks her arm.

"I'm kidding! Geez!"

The redhead huffs. "You'd better be, or I'm tossing you out of this car." Beca bites the finger that Chloe is poking her with. "Besides, you've never had any of **this** in your bed before."

Chloe presses her chest into Beca's, pulling her closer by her shirt. Beca inhales quickly, her hands going instinctively to grip low on Chloe's waist. Groaning, she drops her head back onto the headrest. "You're killing me." There's some low laughter before she feels the wet heat of a tongue tracing the shell of her ear.

"Just wait 'til you see what I can do, Becs. This is nothing."

It becomes apparent to Beca in that moment that they're feeling each other up in the backseat of Chloe's car, even though they're in their mid-20's. At the thought, she laughs. Chloe shifts back, a confused smile on her face. "What's so funny, you?" Beca shakes her head.

"We're like teenagers, sneaking around and touching each other in your car. Like, we have apartments." The redhead hums.

"Yeah, but I haven't really gotten to... **touch you** , yet." Before the brunette can say anything further, Chloe's pulled her up, tilting her head to kiss her.

She really can't complain, not many people ever get to be so intimate with someone as hot as her **girlfriend**! Beca giggles at the thought, momentarily distracting Chloe. She lightly shakes her head. Chloe leans down to connect their lips again, trailing her hands down.

They've fooled around plenty in the few weeks that they've known each other, but a part of Beca still feels the hesitation of wondering if it's too soon to go further. **_Is there some sort of time limit or something? Is it like, immediately or wait until marriage?_** , she muses. Chloe smells like vanilla and citrus, warm and bright. It's very much like her personality. Hands on her chest snap her back into the moment.

Chloe rubs over her breasts with her thumbs, biting her lip and muttering about how thankful she is. Beca smirks. "Thankful for me, or my breasts?"

Chloe laughs. "Can't it be both? Besides, **all** of you is mine." She winks at the brunette.

The fire in her belly explodes. Her hands, which had thus far been resting on Chloe's hips, suddenly come to life, rushing underneath the redhead's shirt. She roughly scratches down her back, causing Chloe to arch into her with a loud moan. Her skin feels smooth and hot, like marble and the surface of the sun. The moan turns into an airy whimper when Beca runs her hands up Chloe's front, pushing underneath her bra and cupping her breasts.

"Jesus Becs," she breathes out as Beca massages her. She smirks into the redhead's neck, biting down to keep the smile from getting too big and ruining everything. She doesn't really have much trouble after that though when her fondling has Chloe grinding down on her.

For a minute, Beca's lost in a mindless exploration of Chloe's body, sensing everything through her hands as she feels the fullness of the redhead's chest pressed into them. She's never seen Chloe **this** ardent before, biting her lip like she's holding on for dear life, eyes closed like she's afraid this experience will cease to be if she sees it, like Beca's her Cupid and she's Psyche, so blessed but unable to gaze upon her love.

There's always been this thing about Chloe that has drawn Beca in.

From the moment she spotted the redhead at work, she's been twisted about, consumed by thoughts of and flailing around in the feelings that Chloe evokes in her. How just a look, a guileless little glance or a salacious wink, can flatten her so thoroughly that she's still picking bits of herself up off the floor later, a couple of hours after she's seen the redhead. There's the flirting, which is probably the most dangerous part about Chloe Beale, who wields her words like weapons and slays with artfully crafted lines, lines so precise that it makes other people combust.

Then there are other talents Chloe has involving her voice. The singing, like a siren call, pulling Beca in like a hapless sailor every single time, sinking in an unending ocean. And the sounds. The noises that are wordless expressions of everything Chloe is.

All of the sounds that Chloe is making has her feeling uncomfortably hot everywhere, like someone's poured lava down her spine and it's flowing through her nerves, setting her skin on fire. And they're intensifying. The whimpers are longer, turning into desperate whines. The moans are deeper, fuller, yet at the same time, lighter when they blend into wild gasps. The redhead has been chewing on her lip to stifle them all. That somehow turns into a challenge for Beca, who wants to break Chloe's self-control, fueled by a lust that burns too hot and not hot enough.

The brunette shifts, grabbing Chloe by the ass and insistently pulling until the redhead is up on her knees. Beca spreads her legs enough to maneuver one of Chloe's in between her own, shifting to brace enough for the redhead to ride her. Chloe's eyes snap open wide, looking at her with a bit of incredulity, like she can't believe that this is happening.

They've fooled around, yeah, but they've never... **taken care** of each other before. Sure, it makes for some intense sexual frustration, because c'mon, Beca has eyes and even if she didn't, the redhead really is just that damn hot. So where they are right now is going into new territory. But she just can't remember why she wanted to stop. So she doesn't.

Wrapping a firm arm around the redhead's waist, she pulls Chloe's lower half against her and pushes her leg up at the same time. Chloe emits a quiet whine, a soft "ooh" that makes everything inside of the brunette ache. They fall into a rhythm, heated and new but so familiar. Beca turns her head back up to kiss her, but she's swept up in the current of Chloe's beauty.

Chloe, who, for the last two months, has both tried really hard and yet was so effortless in the way she presents herself to Beca. Chloe, whose hair seems to have a permanently windswept quality that makes her look like a woodland nymph or a mermaid, all mythical and imbued with a hypnotic magic as she flips it out of her face. Whose eyes are the brightest and purest blue she's ever seen, who shocks the brunette with her ability to put the seven seas to shame. Who treats her body like a temple and it shows in every damn inch, every curve and dip. Lost in her awe, Beca pauses.

Chloe looses a little whine, murmuring Beca's name like she really needs an answer but is slightly anxious about it being unfavorable. "Bec, please." She's nosing the side of Beca's face, encouraging her to return. To her frustration, the brunette tilts her head back. Those baby blues pop open to observe her. "Becs? Are you okay?" Beca's smile is soft and full of the adoration she's been filling herself with.

"Yeah. I was just... I mean, I've known you're ridiculously gorgeous, from the second I saw you. But right now, you're even more breathtaking than usual, and I really wasn't prepared to be hit with it so hard. Like, do you have **any** idea how fucking beautiful you are?" And Chloe's eyes are glassy, full of unshed tears. Beca's heart feels full and it's thumping around in her chest.

"Beca..." She grabs the brunette's cheeks, pulling her up into a passionate kiss, splaying her fingers and brushing them down, across her jaw and her neck.

The height of what feels like unspoken emotions and intense physical attraction causes a dam to break. Chloe's grinding against her more fervently, pouring her words and sounds into Beca's mouth. She rolls on Beca's thigh like a wave, undulating, cresting and falling like a stormy ocean, bursting with raw energy. The brunette has never been a religious person, but she feels like worshipping the woman above her. Anything else feels like it would be an injustice. Because really, how do you not offer all of yourself to someone like Chloe Beale, who is an angel on earth, in the way she looks and how she acts?

Suddenly, Chloe drops her head down to bite down on Beca's neck, a wet cry finding its way out from between her teeth. The sound runs through the brunette like a lightning strike. The redhead's body shudders, her panting making Beca's neck damp. She really has no idea how she feels, so grateful and like she's experienced something holy. _**Happy** ,_ she thinks. Unbelievably **happy**. She gently rubs Chloe's thighs, kissing a shoulder misted in sweat, coaxing her back from her high. With a deep kiss to the the hollow of her throat, pressing a full and sweet hum into it, Chloe sits up and runs a hand through her own hair, moist from exertion. The brunette is reminded briefly of a vision of Aphrodite, fiery desire straddling her. She blows an errant strand away. "Wow."

Beca beams."I'll take that."

Chloe smirks. "You should totes be pleased. I don't say that in bed often." Beca grins cheekily.

"We're not in bed, so..."

Chloe laughs. "You know what I mean." She leans in to kiss Beca, who hums.

"Mmm, as much as I'd love for you to return the favor, I actually think my 'lunch break' ended." She recalls having left her phone behind the counter and so has no idea what time it is, but her Spidey sense is telling her she might be late. Chloe looks unhappy at the news, but after a promise to pick up where they left off later, she relents.

As they exit the car, Chloe stretches and twirls in a circle. Beca bites her lip, still turned on and feeling a wide array of emotions brought on by being with the redhead. When Chloe turns to look at her, Beca smiles and shakes her head at the questioning look.

"It's nothing. Just, you're just... really beautiful, and I really feel really lucky. Really." She rolls her eyes at her word choice, but Chloe's still beaming at her with her sunshine smile.

"Really really?" Beca laughs shortly.

"Yeah Chlo, really really." She reaches down and pulls the redhead's hand into hers, pressing a kiss to the back. Chloe bites her lip to try and control her smile, but it's too wide. She turns away with a blush and a giggle, before groaning.

"God, you make me feel like I'm sixteen again." Beca nods.

"That's a pretty high compliment. Thank you."

The redhead pulls her closer, catching her lips in a sweet kiss. She murmurs against Beca's lips, "Your hair is a little mussed from earlier. Sorry babe." Beca laughs and tries to fix it.

Chloe gives the brunette an embarrassed chuckle when asked if she wants to come hang out in the shop with her. She declines the offer, stating that she feels like Cynthia Rose and Jesse will be able to sense what they just did and that she's not ready to hang around for another three hours with the teasing. Beca understands and after a kiss at the door, the brunette returns to work. When she retrieves her phone from behind the counter, she sees a text from Chloe stating that she actually came to take Beca to lunch, but completely forgot after flying into 'a blind rage', as she calls it. Beca laughs because so much good came from that.

While she's busy grinning like she has the winning lottery numbers, a now mustache-free Jesse comes up to the counter. "Hey Becs, did you go get lunch without me?" She presses her lips together and shakes her head, mulling over her answer. Before she can think of a way to explain her disappearance and also actually get some food, Cynthia Rose comes up. She's got a smarmy smile, and it makes Beca itchy.

"Becs, I saw Chloe pulling you out of here like something was on fire. Did you guys... go out to eat?" She doesn't like to really hit people she cares about, but for a hot second, she's overcome with the urge to wipe the grin off of Cynthia Rose's face, knowing that her words are only making things worse. She darkly mutters something about setting CR's hair on fire. Jesse leans on the counter, looking between the two, before settling his gaze on Beca.

"Chloe came by? Why didn't she stay? Did you guys get lun-" He cuts himself off as his eyes widen in surprise, before leering at her with a Cheshire grin. "Ooohhh." Beca rolls her eyes.

"Yeah, we're all adults here, so can we like, not do this?" She turns to walk away, but bumps into Lilly, who for maybe the first time ever, speaks at an audible volume.

"You smell like sex, Beca."

The brunette blushes deeply and flips everyone off, ignoring their boisterous laughter to go find something to do. As she's leaving, Cynthia Rose starts rapping, " _my hips rockin' as we keep lip lockin'._ " The other two join in, singing loudly enough for her to hear from the end of the store.

Yeah, there's thing about Chloe. It causes her to experience a lot more than she ever has. Beca thinks it's a little bit of magic.

* * *

Thankfully, the teasing dies down by the time they close up, with minimal irritation for the brunette. As Beca turns to walk home, dreams of a cheeseburger on her mind, she spots her redhead in the lot, leaning against her car and tapping on her phone. Deciding to be sneaky, she slinks up, careful to stay out of sight. When she's close enough, she goes in to scare Chloe. There's a brief rush of air that has Beca's hair standing. The brunette ends up ducking just in time to avoid the elbow that was aimed at her face.

With a shriek, she drops into a squat, head in her hands. As she falls back against the side of Chloe's car, a loud ringing starts sounding in her ears. It evolves into a rushing, like a river. Distantly, she can hear Chloe calling her, but her vision narrows into a tiny pinprick of light. She's overcome with a huge sense of vertigo and groans. When Chloe puts her hand on her shoulder, she tries to focus on calming enough not to vomit.

Eventually, everything clears up. She can sense how concerned Chloe is and truthfully, she's a little bothered as well. However, now that it's over it's like it never happened, and she goes back to being hungry. Beca doesn't want to focus on it right this minute. "I'm okay now, I swear. Whatever weird thing that was, it passed. I'm still starving though, since I ended up doing something else for lunch." She winks, hoping to assuage Chloe's fears. The redhead still seems unsettled, but decides to move on.

"I actually came to pick you up for dinner, Becs. Do you want to hang out at my place? Aubrey's at her parents' for the weekend." Beca snickers.

"Now look who's trying to take who home." She can tell that the redhead is amused, but also still thinking about what just transpired. She shakes her head.

"Also, what was with that almost assassination there, Beale? I barely dodged that elbow of yours." Chloe wrinkles her nose, twisting her lips to the side.

"Yeah, sorry about that. I study Bajiquan. Kinda reflexive."

"Bungee-what?" The redhead laughs.

"Bajiquan. It's a martial art. It means 'art of the eight extremities'." She turns to get in her car, leaving Beca gaping like a fish. Beca goes around to plop in the passenger side.

"Woah. Wait. You can't just say something like that all like, 'oh yeah Becs, I'm totes a badass, let's go get ice cream now,' like it's no big deal. That's not how this works!", the brunette says, her voice higher and kinda pitchy. Chloe is scrolling through her music like it's **really no big deal that her head was almost taken off** _._ The brunette slaps her thighs, fixing Chloe with an incredulous stare.

"What? It's really not. Lots of people study martial arts. My dad wanted me to learn something for self-defense. I wanted to be unique so I skipped the karate and tae kwon do." The redhead grimaces like she's embarrassed. Beca's really amused, because if she knew how to do something that cool, she'd be jumping around like a vigilante ninja. Surly and scowly during the day, sweeping legs and saving damsels at night. It was perfect.

The brunette leans against the door, twisted to examine Chloe. She's being so quiet about her **freaking superpower** , humming while she tries to find a song that she wants to sing along to. It's so opposite to how she normally is that it makes Beca want to pursue it.

"Why are you being so tight-lipped about this? You're normally so... verbose." The quick laugh she receives makes her arch an eyebrow. "I know words too, Beale. Answer the question."

Chloe nibbles on her lower lip, watching Beca watch her. It **almost** works in distracting her. But no. She's strong. She's a strong, independent wo- She shakes her head when she realizes that she'd been leaning forward, too focused on the redhead's face. The brunette clears her throat.

"When you take up a martial art, one of the first things you learn is that it's not for your ego. It's a lifestyle, for self-defense and self-discipline." The redhead shrugs a shoulder, looking out the window. "So, yeah, I could totes kick some butt, and yeah, I **kinda** almost caused you serious harm because I thought you were some big bad burglar. But maybe I'll just use this to sweep you off your feet, huh? You sound pretty obsessed with this." With a wink, Chloe's back to her usual self.

Beca huffs because she really wants to deny it but now that the threat of decapitation is gone, her memory of the event is focused on how attractive Chloe is. She grumbles about how the redhead is gross and full of cooties, turning away to look out the passenger side window. Suddenly, she's enveloped in Chloe, in her scent and her hair, flowing over Beca's shoulder. The redhead bites down on her ear, murmuring, "Baby, girls don't have cooties."

She's blushing, she knows it. She can feel the burn, unless it's because Chloe is so damn hot that she's literally setting things around her on fire. Which, probably possible. She can't help but lean in, resting the side of her head against Chloe's. She takes a deep breath of Chloe's perfume and mumbles back.

"Yeah, I know. You're alright, Chlo." She knows that the redhead is getting ready to tease her for her less-than-stellar descriptor, so she speaks up again. "You're pretty awesome. Still a nerd, but an awesome one. And I like you. Like a lot." Chloe pulls away a little so that she can see Beca.

"I... Beca, you-" She sighs a little, looking down at Beca's lips. Chloe presses a quick kiss then breaks away to whisper, "I think you're alright too. Really really alright." The brunette laughs in surprise, but an uncontrollable smile is taking over her face.

"Thanks for throwing my words back at me, Beale."

"You started it."

They share another kiss before Chloe pats her thigh and leans back. "Okay, so, you must be starving. What are you in the mood for?" Beca eyes the redhead, being rewarded with a sultry smirk and a, "besides me, of course."

"Cheeseburger." Beca crosses her arms at the laughter. "What?" Chloe shakes her head in amusement.

"You just really sounded like a toddler there, for a second. All grumpy and demanding a cheeseburger. I felt like I was a mom or something." The brunette's scoff is like the crack of a whip. She shrugs.

"Whatever. I'm hungry. I haven't eaten all day. I get to be a little moody." She tilts her head to the side as she considers the woman in the driver's seat. "Y'know, you'd be a good mom."

Chloe fixes her with a watery look, like Beca's just paid her a huge compliment.

"Come on, let's go get you that cheeseburger."

* * *

 **AN: Cynthia Rose sings a line from Natalia Kill's 'Problem'. The song is sampled in Pitch Perfect 2's Convention mix, the infamous 'gold tracksuit' number.**


	4. Day 63 & 70

"Beca, calm down. Your food isn't going anywhere."

Chloe's got a tiny amused quirk to her lips, watching as Beca scarfs down her second cheeseburger like it really might get up and run. Squinting her eyes at the redhead, she just takes an exaggeratedly large bite, maintaining eye contact even as she internally realizes it's a little too much. But she's already here; she can't back out. Desperately chewing, she ignores the cackle as Chloe goes back to her stupid salad.

They're seated on Chloe's couch in her shared apartment. The TV is on, turned to a jazz station because the brunette doesn't want to watch anything and Chloe wanted **something**. Music is a good middle ground. There are no pictures playing, but the redhead seemed delighted when Beca would imitate one of the instruments, gleefully informing her she would have fit in perfectly in the Bellas. Blinking away some tears from the struggle of dealing with the consequences of her actions, Beca takes a sip of her soda.

"So, how can you just eat like, grass all of the time?" Chloe scrunches her nose.

"It's not grass, Becs. These, these are called vegetables." She points to the lettuce with her fork. "And this here?" She holds up a speared tomato. "This is a fruit." The brunette rolls her eyes.

"I know what those things are, Chlo. I do try to eat something healthy. Like, once in a while. But you **always** eat grass." There's a huff.

"Vegetables! And I'm not like, raw vegan or anything. Besides, you could definitely benefit from going vegetarian for a while. Or maybe come running with me sometime, y'know?" She picks up her water bottle, giving Beca such a heated sidelong glance that she imagines herself being dropped into a dry sauna. "Being healthier does wonders for your stamina." That suggestive wink punctuates the end of the statement, sitting in the silence like a promise. Beca coughs.

"Uh, I'm good. I don't like exercise." She picks up a french fry to give herself something to do.

Chloe shakes her head. "You're so lucky that you can just do whatever you want and look the way you do, Beca."

"Well, maybe you should stop taking such great care of yourself, because you're so pretty it's kinda unfair to the mortals you're surrounded by." She rolls her eyes and stuffs the french fry in her mouth, avoiding eye contact. Chloe's tinkling laughter is musical, like everything else she does. The redhead sets her food on the coffee table and fixes her sparkling eyes at her. Chloe props her elbow on the back of the couch and rests her head in her hand. It's really something, how you can hear a smile in a person's voice.

"Do you **really** want me to stop looking so good?" Beca's full of shit.

"Yeah, but I somehow think it's probably impossible. It sounds like something that can only backfire. Like if destroying Dorian Gray's painting opened Pandora's Box."

A manicured hand drifts onto her lap, nails skating along her jeans, dancing towards her inner thigh. Chloe leans in, sighing into her ear, "We need to finish what we started, by the way. I think you'll be thankful that I'm in such great shape, babe."

Beca shifts restlessly, a canary caught between a cat's jaws. She stares at a spot on the wall as the redhead pulls at her ear with her teeth, soothing with a light flick of her tongue. She feels the coiling, low in her gut, winding tighter as she's suddenly reminded how turned on she was earlier in the day.

"You're right, what was I thinking?", Beca mutters as she turns to meet Chloe. She barely registers the smirk gracing red lips before she's sinking into the kiss.

It's hot and heavy from the start, the static that's been building all day finally sparking and setting the room on fire like it's been filled with gasoline. Chloe nudges the brunette down so she can lie on top of her as their legs tangle. Smooth hands run up her sides, brushing her ribs like Chloe's an archaeologist dusting off precious artifacts. Beca grunts as the redhead uses those perfectly manicured nails to scratch down with a low chuckle against her mouth.

The brunette surges up, pushing into the kiss and licking into Chloe's mouth. She can tell how well-received her actions are by how deeply the redhead moans, gripping at her hip and rolling into it. It feels like a lava flow, slow and steady and fiery. She's suffused in Chloe again, tasting her in the air and on her tongue. Beca lets her head fall back as her hips are pulled against a knee, shutting her eyes and running her hands through her hair.

As she looks at Chloe, she sees that the redhead has her head bowed, resting her forehead on Beca's collar bone, focusing on rocking her knee into the brunette. She reaches down to pull swollen lips back to hers and raises her own knee to give Chloe some relief. It draws out a light whimper, pushed out on the end of a whine.

They move against each other, and Beca's one half of a whirling tornado, stirring and pulsing with all of everything that's between her and Chloe. She can't seem to get close enough, grabbing at the redhead's shirt like a lifeline. She keeps pulling, but they're still too far away. Beca considers just tearing her shirt off. Chloe breathes out against her lips, clicking her teeth like she finds something funny and wants to bite. Licking the brunette's bottom lip, she purrs, "Baby, I really like this shirt. Please don't rip it."

Beca's hands feel like they're going to be sore from how tensely she's holding onto the fabric. She spreads her hands wide and lets go, giving the redhead a searing glare.

"Then take it off, or I will tear it off." And she really didn't mean to, but it comes out in a growl. Fortunately, Chloe's eyes darken and she accepts the command.

Laying beneath Chloe like this, with the redhead shirtless, she thinks about how glad she is that Chloe is so dedicated to her body. The brunette reaches out and runs a palm up Chloe's abdomen, feeling the muscle tense under soft skin. She hears Chloe's breath hitch, sees her hands fist on her thighs. She can practically feel how much the woman is holding herself back, giving Beca the time she needs to examine Aphrodite's temple. Not that Chloe would ever call herself that, but the brunette really can't help but make the comparison.

Beca sits up, surprising her, and buries her face in the redhead's neck. Chloe's hands come around to rest over her shoulders, idly running fingers through dark locks. The brunette takes the time to breathe deeply, just reveling in the moment. "I'm so glad that I met you."

She can feel the gentle smile in the way Chloe combs through her hair. Feel it in how softly the redhead rests her head against Beca's, nuzzling and pressing a barely there kiss to it like a whisper in the wind. With a cute little breath of a laugh, Chloe says, "I thought you were a badass." She tries to lessen the blow with another kiss, but it's too late.

The brunette tilts back towards the arm of the couch, biting out a, "I **am**. I'm tough and totally bad news. Don't you see my tattoos and piercings?" And yeah, it's more BS because her tattoos are deep and not skulls or spikes and even **she** knows she's not that tough (her girlfriend is actually more of a badass), but she's come 24 years with this. Beca scoffs. "I swear, it's like we don't even know each other." Chloe doesn't seem the least bit convinced, instead looking like she's the big wolf in a story where little furry things are eaten. Beca feels like she's giving off 'delicious forest critter' vibes.

Her redheaded wolf leans in, gripping Beca's thighs in a vice, crooning into her ear, an angel sound all sultry and salacious. " _Baby you're no gooood, 'cause they warned me 'bout your type girl_." Her reaction is immediate. It's a wet fire glissading down, dripping and melting everything. It's wild and hot and sucks all of the air out of the room.

" _Baby you're no gooood. Think I fell for you, I fell for you, I fell for you._ " She resettles on Beca's lap, hands massaging the brunette's shoulders, serenading Beca with a voice like liquid sex. She's grinding in time to the lyrics of The Weeknd's 'Acquainted' like she wrote the song herself, just for this moment.

" _You got me puttin' time in, time in. Nobody got me feelin' this wayy_." And Beca has no idea how she hasn't just completely been absorbed by the couch, feeling like a puddle, the remnants of an ice block under the scorching heat of her personal sun. She can feel Chloe's chest brushing against her with every roll of redhead's hips, dark blue lace straining around ample breasts.

Chloe skips over a couple of lines, instead simply humming as she works Beca over. The brunette's hands are clamped over Chloe's waist and her mouth feels like a desert. She figures it's probably because all of the moisture in her body has moved south. She reaches behind to unclasp Chloe's bra, exhaling in admiration. The redhead is still moving on top of her, winking and piercing Beca with a hooded gaze as she purrs out, " _girl, I'm so glad we're acquainted._ "

The brunette dips her head down to kiss along Chloe's collarbone, dropping to the swell of a breast. The lyrics are interspersed with sighs that are coming more frequently. When she takes the redhead's nipple into her mouth, Chloe's singing cuts off, replaced with a cry and a breathy, "oh god." She throws her head back and runs a hand through her hair, grinding down harder.

Beca licks up to her ear, singing a line from the song, " _You got me touchin' on your bodyy._ " And it seems like it's the right thing to do, because the redhead jerks her up roughly by the collar of her shirt, locking her in a bruising kiss that takes the air out of her lungs.

Beca's never really experienced the kind of all-consuming obsession that she's heard others use to describe people they liked. She's always been a careful kind of girlfriend, dating but not getting so invested or reliant. Jesse once described her as a "bottomless pit of emotionless sarcasm" jokingly. People have thought of her as uncaring because of her issues, and rightfully so. It's taken a lot of work to get to the point where she doesn't feel the need to kick in place of a hug, or to hightail it when someone admits to liking her in any way.

Everything that she feels with Chloe is new. It's a new experience, to think about someone from the moment she wakes up until she goes to sleep. It's new, feeling such an intense fluttering of butterflies that it's more like a sandstorm. It's new to look at someone and feel like you just **can't** see enough, that you can't be close enough, that nothing short of coalescence is sufficient. She's never felt this way about anything, the way she feels about Chloe.

So when she moves her hand to the button of Chloe's shorts, it's with this revelation in mind. The redhead sucks in a breath, snapping her eyes to Beca's face, searching. "Becs?"

The look that Chloe is giving her is supercharged and swirling with emotion. Beca nods. "I'm sure. I... I lo-" Chloe's eyes widen.

Like a blast from the past, an interruption arrives. This time, it's in the form of Aubrey opening the front door, some old song falling from her lips as she strides in, perfectly calm and unaware. Beca's noise of shock draws attention to them, something like a mouse being stepped on. Everything freezes as the three process the situation. Then, Aubrey drops her keys on the floor and screams.

That prompts Chloe to scream as well, and she ducks down into the brunette's chest. At the same time that Beca instinctively begins to roll off the couch, her arms wrap around the redhead. There's a solid thump from between the couch and coffee table.

Chloe sits up, grabbing her shirt from the floor and covering herself with it.

"Aubrey! What are you doing here!? I thought you were spending the weekend at your parents'!", she screeches out around a blush. The blonde stomps her foot and puts her hands on her hips.

"God, Chloe! I told you I WASN'T! Is this what you do when I'm not home?!" Beca winces as the yelling gets louder. She wants to de-escalate the situation, but she's not sure how to. She's pretty sure a joke would only make everything worse.

As Chloe gets dressed, the two bicker back and forth. Aubrey demands they get the couch steam cleaned, to which the redhead angrily replies that they didn't get far enough to warrant that kind of intensive cleaning. Beca decides to quietly eat the rest of her fries.

* * *

"So, that was fun. I'm super glad the drill sergeant came home. I haven't been yelled at like that since I was a teenager." Chloe's remorseful puppy eyes tug at Beca's heart strings. "I'm really sorry, Becs. I should've listened harder."

"It's fine, we should have been in here anyways." The brunette muses whether it would have been worse if it was Jesse. Probably.

They've relocated to Chloe's bedroom, lying side by side. The redhead has her head resting on her elbow, in between Beca and the wall. The brunette is staring at the ceiling, sorting through her feelings in the background as they converse. Chloe sighs, wriggling a bit as she stretches. "She's crazy if she thinks I'm getting that couch steam cleaned. We were dressed."

At the arcing of Beca's eyebrow, the redhead shrugs a shoulder, a flirty smirk on her lips. "Well, mostly dressed. Point is, I wasn't rolling around butt naked on it."

It's said casually, but it has a big impact. Beca is assailed with images of a fully naked Chloe, writhing beneath her, heated and wild, letting loose wanton noises. It's insane, how intensely things concerning Chloe make her feel. Beneath her daydream, she can hear the redhead saying something. Refocusing her eyes, she sees the woman watching her, the embodiment of a firecracker, waiting for a spark to set her off. Before Chloe can say anything, Beca opens her mouth.

"Yes, I was thinking about you naked. Yes, it was hot. Yes, I'm bothered." And she just rolls her eyes at the tremendous solar blast of a grin her words evoke. The redhead looks like she just got all of the good Halloween candy and Christmas presents on her birthday. It kind of illuminates the whole room and Beca fights the urge to squint her eyes. Turning her body to face Chloe, she pushes a fiery lock behind her ear, tracing the shell of it.

"I know I almost said something, and I know you probably know what I was going to say. I still..." Beca drifts off. "Like, I think-" she stops and forcefully pushes a breath out, trying to find a way to say what she means without making it seem like she was unsure or regretful. The silence stretches for a few minutes, with only their breathing between them. Worry begins to collect on the redhead's brow, beading in small amounts and gathering in between her eyebrows and at the corners of her mouth, pulling them down. Beca kisses her forehead, tapping Chloe's chin with her index finger to bring their lips together, establishing a physical connection that will soothe them both.

"I'm just being dumb. Everything with you feels so crazy and new and amazing and I just, I need time to process it. Is that okay?" And now she's the one with the furrowed brow, the one with the worry and the anxiety. But she's forgotten who she's talking to, because it's Chloe.

The woman who, after only two weeks of knowing each other, showed up to her apartment when Beca was sick carrying chicken soup and spewing a corny song like she was a singing gram. Who delivered the most ridiculous one-liners between spoonfuls that she **had** to feed Beca. Chloe is the woman who admitted to usually falling into relationships quickly, jumping into bed, who nodded like it was no big deal when Beca wanted to take it slowly even though the brunette could **see** how badly her arousal messed with her. This is Chloe that she's talking to, who's been looking at Beca like she could fly. She exhales deeply, staring into eyes that seemed like they never stopped sparkling.

Chloe reaches out, tracing the line of Beca's jaw delicately, brushing her fingers across with such an aching tenderness that the brunette feels her eyes water. They dance briefly over her lips and then continue their trek. Her eyes close of their own volition, spurred by the magnitude of the emotion pouring through Chloe's touch.

"Beca, of course it's okay. I'm not going anywhere." A patient smile, like there's absolutely no rush in the world.

Aubrey walks by, knocking loudly on the door as she passes. "You'd better steam that couch, Chlo!" The redhead sits up, yelling at the door. "If you hassle me about the couch ONE more time, Aubrey, I'm going to burn it!"

And yeah, of course it's okay, it's Chloe.

* * *

Beca changed her mind. It's not okay. Nothing is okay.

"I regret this so much. Why did I believe you?" There's a grunt from behind her.

"Don't be such a sourpuss, babe. This is fun! We're bonding!" She turns to glower at the redhead, covered in mud and still looking like sunshine.

"Yeah, _babe._ Great idea. Thanks for convincing us to come _bond_." Cynthia Rose snarks over Chloe's shoulder, just as muddy as the rest of them.

They're at Aubrey's _other job_ , as an _actual_ drill sergeant, being yelled at by the blonde to "buckle up! Work together ladies!", with her trained singing voice, bellowing from her diaphragm. Beca knew it. She _knew_ that the niggling in the back of her mind was warning her about something.

But no. She had to be weak. She had to be swayed by a beautiful redhead with her winsome smile and adorable little pout, pulling on Beca's shirt and saying, "Please, baby? For me?" with her tone a mix between begging and whining. And now here she was, paying the price by crawling through the muck and _bonding_. Her contempt for the situation causes her internal scoff to materialize.

"Shawshank, you're a terrible person, and I just wanted to be a good friend and let you know that, yeah." Fat Amy lies on the other side of the mud pit, looking very much like a mound of wet dirt. Her eyes are closed.

Directly in front of her, Stacie is slumped over, half in and half out of the mud, exhausted from trying to help Amy out. She laughs with her head on her forearms, face turned into the ground.

"We can't be too mad. If I had someone like _Chloe_ to sleep with, I'd agree to stupid things, too." There's a lot of sputtering from Beca, from the comment and from the mud that she's battling. Whose idea of bonding is this?

"We're not-!.. No. You know what? Green isn't flattering on any of you." She climbs over the last log with a grunt, pushing Chloe back into the wet slush when she comes up behind, gearing up to join the teasing. Her high-pitched shriek is worth it.

"Beca!" As the brunette sits on the edge of the pit, she grins at the sight before her.

Chloe's one big stick of mud, luminous blue eyes the only thing any color other than a murky tan. And she's frowning, hands on her hips, still one log between them. "You jerk!"

She can't help but throw her head back and laugh fully, because okay, guilty. She was a little bit of an ass. Through her tears she sees the redhead approaching with a face like thunder. Beca scrambles up and away, dodging Chloe as she lunges. "Get back here!"

The brunette maneuvers back passed the rest of the group, passed Jessica who was helping Ashley through the mud pit. She jumped over Lilly, lying on the ground making a mud angel while Flo scraped mud chunks out of her hair next to her. Hot on her heels, like a hellion in the night, was one Chloe Beale.

She must have run track in high school.

Ignoring Aubrey's shouts, the brunette makes for the woods, intent on hiding out until Chloe cooled off. She quickly makes her way past the first few lines of trees. Before she knows what's going on, she's in the air, suspended in a net. "Whoa!"

Caught between the exhilaration of running for her life and the adrenaline of being trapped in a net, she goes silent. Underneath her, Chloe races by and further into the woods. The brunette takes a second to admire her form and speed. Because yeah, that's still a thing.

After she's done smirking about evading her girlfriend, it dawns on her that Chloe was the only person who saw her this far out. "Oh my god, what if I die out here? Oh no. I still need to learn how to juggle! I-"

In the middle of her panic and wondering if she should have replied to that post card Sheila sent her from their trip to Florida, Beca hears a creaking from above her. Fearing that the branch she's suspended on is cracking, she twists her head up, already praying in advance.

From among the leaves, Lilly is hanging upside down, staring at the brunette with eyes wide open. Air leaves the brunette's lung in a loud whoosh, expelled with all of the rush of a flash flood. Relief about not dying out here fills her.

"Lilly! Help me!"

The Asian woman descends on the anchoring rope, climbing downwards like Spiderman. Once she reaches Beca, Lilly licks the side of her face and gently pats it. It's weird, but it's Lilly. With a strangely intense whispering, she produces a kunai and saws into the rope, allowing Beca to fall through the hole and into the leaves.

"Oof!"

Lilly lands beside her, completely silent, even in the crunchy leaf litter. Beca groans.

"Ow. Thanks for saving my life, Lilly." Her ghostly friend opens her mouth to speak, but stops when she hears rustling from far off. She instead squats down to pat Beca a couple of times on the head succinctly, a one-two flat-palmed little thing, before springing away like a deer. The brunette briefly considers calling after her, but rethinks her decision. Just as she's getting up and peeling leaves off of herself, she feels a burning sensation on the back of her head. She doesn't even have to turn around to know.

"There you are, you little sneak." The tone is low.

Beca spins around, ready to wink her way out of trouble, but before she's even finished turning, Chloe has her pinned against the tree by her shoulders. For all of that sprinting, she's not even remotely winded. The brunette swallows nervously and blows out a tiny laugh that cracks in the middle like a ship about to sink. "H-hey Chlo, so, you're looking really pret-wah! Okay!"

Chloe hikes Beca's legs up with her 'bungee-con' arms and steps in to support her weight. It's a pretty provocative situation, admittedly. The brunette's arms fly to Chloe's shoulders reflexively. She wants to ask a question, about what's going on or if she's going to die out here, but her words die in her throat.

The redhead's stare bores into her, eyes like a roaring flame. Beca briefly remembers comparing Chloe to a wolf, and sees the humor in being pinned against a tree in the woods by the very same woman. She feels a lot like lunch.

"So, uh... about earlier..." Beca has never really seen eyes actually flash in any way, but right now it seems it would be the first time she experiences it. Chloe's hands slide from the backs of her thighs to squeeze her ass. As her eyebrows fly off of her face, the redhead smirks.

"You're such a jerk, Beca Mitchell. You didn't even make sure that I was okay." And she doesn't sound as upset, instead kinda like she's already gotten her revenge. Considering their positions, Beca would agree.

"But you're totally okay. It's just mud. Did you get hurt?" The redhead nods.

"I've got a little boo boo. Kiss it better?" The pout on her face is ridiculous, but the brunette feels herself falling for it anyways.

"You're just as pretty covered in mud, Beale. It's really not fair," she sighs, wrapping a hand around Chloe's neck to pull her in. As their lips connect, Beca idly notices how long the redhead's lashes are.

It's never been a secret that Chloe's coquettish. She's as slyly flirtatious as they come, especially where Beca's concerned. She uses her skill in that area to manipulate the brunette and it's pretty much a fact. Stacie was right, Chloe convinces her to do a lot that she would normally say no to.

It's not so bad though, because she's experienced so many new and sometimes wonderful things with the redhead's encouragement. As Beca thinks about how all of the struggling through the obstacle courses and the mud pit lead to this moment - after the almost dying in the bear trap, that is - she's grateful for how easily she's swayed by Chloe.

* * *

"Are you really saying that those bear traps are for our safety? Because I didn't feel so safe when I almost died." Aubrey seems to have a bit of a smug smirk.

"Yes, Beca. They not only encourage camp-goers to stay on the trails, but keep bears from coming too far into camp." The brunette scoffs and gathers her shower items. She can feel the blonde watching her, and wonders where Chloe went.

"What are your intentions with my best friend, Beca?" She sighs, knowing that this conversation was going to come up sooner or later.

The brunette throws a towel over her shoulder and turns around. This isn't really a conversation she wants to have standing outside the tent that she's going to have to share with a bunch of other women in the middle of the woods. Tilting her head towards the showers, she makes her way over as Aubrey follows.

"I really like Chloe. She's special." The blonde hums beside her, but remains silent. Beca squints up at the sky for a second, figuring out her words.

"I've never like... I'm not just playing around." She doesn't know if it's enough, but the brunette doesn't want to say too much, admitting feelings to the blonde that she hasn't even told Chloe yet. Thankfully, Aubrey seems to understand enough about Beca to know that she can be hard to pry specificity from.

"Do you see yourself with Chloe five years from now?" Beca raises her eyebrows and turns to stare at Aubrey, stumbling a bit as they walk.

"You do know we've only been together for like, a couple of months, right?" She hears her own voice mocking her in the back of her mind, reliving her near-confession the day Chloe almost burned her couch. Aubrey shrugs.

"If you can't even imagine it vaguely at this point, Beca, with how much time you two spend together, then you have no business being with her. I don't want her falling for you more before you decide that you really don't want to be with her. It would break her heart, and I can't let that happen again if I have a chance to protect her." And Beca's ready to bite back, to put Aubrey in her place, but she realizes that the blonde is right. Her throat burns harshly, and it pulls her back to a memory from a month ago.

 _Beca's sitting at her desk, playing around on a mixing program Jesse got for her. She likes the challenge of putting songs together, to make things that would otherwise never work fit seamlessly. She pulls the bottom of her skirt down a little to adjust it._

 _Behind her, Chloe stretches on the brunette's bed, rustling around after a quick cat nap she had no intention of taking. She hums into her stretch. "Mmm, why did you let me fall asleep, Becs?" And she has to turn away when the redhead rubs her eyes, because she's so cute that Beca's heart squeezes painfully. Chair turned back towards the laptop, she shrugs._

 _"You seemed tired. It's fine, I don't mind a relaxing day. Should we order in?" Beca picks her phone up from beside her. "What do you want?" She feels the redhead drape herself over the back of the chair. A hand burrows into her locks, combing through them. The other hand runs down Beca's arm to toy with her fingers._

 _"Aside from you?" Like it's nothing. "Maybe like, Thai or something. What are you feeling?" Over the last month, the brunette has come to realize just how touchy and flirtatious the redhead is. Beca supposes that to her, a question like that is just a statement of fact. Chloe rests her head on Beca's shoulder, nudging it with hers._

 _Turning her head, she mumbles, "I'm feeling you, I think." And there's this minuscule curving of lips, a small twist that indicates that Chloe's charmed by the response but won't make it a huge moment. She presses a kiss to the brunette's lips, withdrawing to let the smile grow._

 _They decide to get Thai food after playing 'Indecision Ping Pong', where they keep passing the choice to the other. As Beca puts the phone down, Chloe returns from the bathroom, pressing a towel to her face. Instead of letting her go back to sitting on the bed by herself, Beca gets up to tackle her. With a giggle and a shriek, they go down in a heap on the duvet._

 _She's covered in piles of Chloe's hair as they lie next to each other, all of these fiery waves. She's breathless, for no other reason than the redhead. "You took forever in the bathroom, dude." Another giggle, another wink, another painful heart squeeze._

 _"Aw, did 'Badass Beca' miss her lil' ol' redhead?" And she doesn't wait for Beca to say anything, just laughing like she knows exactly how the denial will go._

 _"Yeah, actually, I did." The brunette sees she's caught Chloe by surprise from the way her eyebrows lift. She's pleased, though. Chloe slowly rolls them over, curtaining them with her hair._

 _"Well, are you going to show me how much you missed me?" A self-satisfied smirk. Beca leans up, pressing a kiss at the same time that she slides her hand over a hip and into the back pocket of Chloe's jeans._

 _As with every other time they're this close, things get heated pretty quickly. Chloe seems especially appreciative of the skirt that she chose to wear today, running eager hands up and down her thighs. "Thank God for skirts." What else can she do but huff a laugh in response? Because yeah, thank God, indeed._

 _"I'm glad you like it, Chlo."_

 _In lieu of words, the redhead puts her hand on Beca's ass, grinning like a bandit at her when she pulls away. She's about to spout off a flirty remark when Chloe squeezes hard. "Oh yeah, I definitely like it, Beca. You should wear more skirts." Shutting her eyes, she nods in response, biting her lip as she fights the urge to seek relief against the body above her._

 _Distantly, she notes that Chloe is beginning to slide down, but it's only when the hand moves away to lift her shirt that she really pays any attention. From between her legs, Chloe's sliding her shirt up. The redhead rests her head on Beca's bare stomach, looking as content as a tiger in the sun. The air is full of honey, so sweet it's heavy, but this moment that they're in is soft as a feather, so light it only needs the slightest draft to float up, twirling._

 _"Y'know, Aubrey is jealous of you." That pops the bubble they've been sitting in, and Beca bunches her eyebrows together._

 _"What do you mean? Does she- does she like you or something?" Chloe wrinkles her nose and shakes her head, relaxed._

 _"No, just that, I've been spending all of my free time with you and she's upset that she only sees me as I'm leaving in the morning and sometimes when I get back at night. I feel bad because I was just thinking about how I could do this forever with you." And still so casual, still just a statement of facts. Beca opens her mouth, but nothing comes out._

 _It's like her throat has been filled with hot lead and she's afraid to try speaking again. She's afraid that if she opens her mouth, she might cry instead. Chloe's just there, laying her head on her stomach, hands laced together under her chin, not rushing, not hurrying to do anything. Just happy to be where they are, hanging out in a bedroom. Beca shakes her head._

 _"I've never met anyone like you, Chloe." The tiger stretches, a little mewl sneaking out._

 _"Yeah, I've been told I'm one of a kind. Usually it's in a bad way, because I'm pretty outgoing and it makes people uncomfortable." She laughs at herself, agreeing with that assessment. And that's just wrong, because Chloe shouldn't feel that way about herself, that she ever makes anyone feel bad just by being how she is._

 _"No, you're one of a kind, in the best way possible. I'll say it however much and in whatever way I need to." Beca **needs** Chloe to understand it. She pulls one of the redhead's hands to her mouth, kissing her knuckles, staring into sky blue eyes. Chloe nibbles on her lip, a blush forming. She takes her hand back to crawl up and kiss Beca. _

_"I don't know how this isn't a dream, Beca. Sometimes it feels like you're too good to be true." The doorbell rings, and Chloe slides away. She squeezes Beca's knee affectionately, pressing a long kiss to it, closing her eyes and inhaling, before getting up completely and going to get the door._

 _Beca covers her face with her hands, struggling to put her heart back into her chest. She feels like she's just been electrocuted. The tears she was trying to push away spring up, a couple of them escaping before she takes a deep inhale to settle herself. There's a small knock, and Beca looks up. It's Chloe, leaning against the doorframe, head rested against it. "You okay, Becs?"_

 _Beca nods, the beginnings of a smile making its way out from underneath her feelings._

 _"Yeah. I'm great. I'm just happy."_

When she turns back to look at Aubrey, she wonders what her face looks like. She feels like someone's been trying to strangle her while she was reminiscing, and her eyes burn like she'd put onions in them. As she tries to clear her throat, she can definitely hear how wet the sound is.

"I don't know what else to tell you, Aubrey, other than that nobody has ever made me feel this way. I'll be with Chloe for as long as she wants me." And it's not quite a confession of love, but it's as close as one can get without saying the words, because Beca pretty much just promised forever. The blonde studies her.

"You're good for Chloe. You keep her grounded. You help her in a way that I can't. So for that, thank you." Beca nods, and Aubrey keeps talking. "But if you hurt her, if you break her heart because you don't want to do this, I swear that I will do everything that I can to break you back. Chloe feels everything with her whole heart. When it breaks, it breaks fully too."

"We both know how special Chloe is, Aubrey." She rubs her knuckle over the bridge of her nose. "We both know she's too good for this world."

And like fate, like destiny, like magic, Beca's eyes are drawn to the redhead. Through the trees, passed the cabins, across the distance. Chloe is standing by the lake, trying to skip rocks with Amy and Flo. Amy's cast goes horribly wrong, flying off to the side and into the grass. The blonde gesticulates wildly, spitting out what Beca assumes are colorful insults. Chloe throws her head back, arms around her stomach, laughing so loudly that Beca can hear it from where she stands.

She really has no idea how long she stares, but when she remembers Aubrey, she notices the soft smile the blonde has.

"Maybe you're okay after all, Beca."


	5. 6 Months

"Beca, you don't work today. Please go home. **Please** _._ "

"But how about I just organi-"

"BECA. GO HOME."

Okay so, maybe she's getting in everyone's hair. But that doesn't mean Cynthia Rose needs to be so harsh! She just doesn't want to be home alone.

It seems like she's impervious to Beca's pouting and pleading, though. The brunette wishes Chloe was here, because she would totally cave.

And that brings them to the heart of the problem.

Chloe has been incredibly busy the last two weeks with tutoring. Beca had absolutely no idea just **how** popular her girlfriend was, but she figures that she really should have known better. Chloe Beale was a living, breathing, teacher fantasy. Even if she had no interest in Russian or singing, she would pay to have Chloe teach her. Because hello?

A glasses-clad Ms. Beale (even though she's got excellent vision), with the pencil skirt and button-up white blouse tucked in (top buttons undone, of course), casually leaning against a table to give her feet some relief from her heels, talking to you about something she knows like the back of her hand. That sparkly thing her eyes do. Beca imagines being a rowdy teenager just trying to get her attention. Honestly speaking, she is kinda that way **now**.

Running around Chloe like an occasionally grouchy puppy, bouncing about and bringing all manner of dog-related items over, like sticks, chewed up tennis balls, and someone's shoes. She's had to endure a veritable mountain of tomfoolery from her friends in the last six months, in what seems to be some sort of compounding scale. For every single week that passed, the sappier she became, turning quickly into someone she would barely have recognized. In a good way. In a 'totally smitten' way.

Drawn in like a moth to the flame, she fluttered about Chloe's magical allure. And just like a fire, the closer she got, the hotter everything became, until she was burning up in her fire's atmosphere. That was probably the best way to describe interactions with the redhead: really, really bright, and really, really hot.

It had gotten to the point where Jesse had seemed shocked when Beca mentioned hanging out with him and Benji, sans Chloe. And so it was a bit of fortunate timing, that Chloe had been so swamped. She'd gotten to reconnect with her friends plenty in the last couple of weeks. They'd even made solid plans to hang out more.

But that didn't mean that she missed her redhead any less.

Jesse slides over from behind the counter, hugging Beca by the shoulders. His face holds all of the amusement that he's debating on unleashing.

"Becs, you'll be okay. Chloe will be back soon. Just go relax." She rolls her eyes and pushes away from him.

"Let me be a productive member of society, dude." She tries to slide by, but in a move that is very martial-artist-Chloe-esque, Jesse guides her with his outstretched arm, sweeping her back the way she came and towards the door. Beca suddenly understands how sheep feel when they're being herded.

"Okay, okay! Jesus!", she grumbles.

Amidst cheery farewells from Cynthia Rose and Jesse, she walks out into the bright California sun. The brunettes expels a pained sigh, digging for her phone. A quick check reveals no new messages.

Not that she really expected Chloe to have texted back in the last half hour. She was with a student, after all. Beca just **missed** her. Slipping her sunglasses on, she decides to go get coffee.

She's in the middle of typing out a really sappy text message to Chloe when she hears a car crash. It's a lot louder than she thought it would be, the sound of scratching metal screeching harshly. It raises the hair on the back of her neck.

Jogging over, she sees that an SUV has bitten into the side of a sedan, taking some paint with it. Emerging from the passenger side, a tall brunette stumbles over to the sidewalk and sits down. Beca goes to check, already spotting a store owner on the phone nearby, ignoring the headache that seems to have come from the sound of metal on metal.

"Hey, are you okay?" The tall brunette, a young woman, rubs her temple and nods unsurely.

"Um, yeah, I barely moved when we got hit. Just a little bump." Beca shakes her head. The headache paves the way for an annoying ringing to buzz in her ears.

"We should still get you checked out, dude. You might have a concussion or something." She sits down next to the taller woman. "So, I'm Beca. What's your name?" Buzz, buzzing.

"I'm Emily. You don't have to wait with me, I'll be okay." Beca shrugs. Now the headache is tapping out a beat, thumping against her temples.

"I wasn't doing anything else. I was just going to go be bored by myself. I might as well do a good deed. So, tell me about yourself while we wait. Otherwise we'll both end up being really awkward and talk about the weather. Which, yikes." The ringing turns into a beeping.

The more Beca learns about Emily, the more she finds the young woman (girl, basically) amusing. The best part is that she's even more awkward than Beca. "So, your last name really is Junk? That's perfect." Thankfully, the humor causes the headache and noise to subside.

Emily laughs. "Yeah, I've heard a lot of 'junk' and 'hard-on' jokes." She hugs her knees. "I'm really okay, my head doesn't even hurt anymore." The driver comes over, finally done talking to the man that was in the SUV. She looks like an older version of Emily. The girl stands up.

"Beca, this is my mom, Katherine. Mom, this is Beca." Katherine Junk looks like a regal woman, with good posture and an air of poise. Beca stands up and shakes her hand.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Katherine. I was just sitting with Emily and making sure she didn't pass out or anything." Emily whines.

"I'm okay! Barely even a bump! Like, a nudge or something!" Her mother comes over, holding Emily's head by her cheeks, turning it this way and that to inspect it.

"Well, we should still get it checked, and you can go check out that music store later." In the middle of more whining, Beca speaks up.

"Music store? Do you mean The Music Emporium?" Emily's eyes light up.

"Yeah! I wanted to see about getting a job there. Mom doesn't want me to move here unless I have something." Beca's nodding before the taller brunette even finishes.

"That's cool. I work there. We can stop by after we make sure you're all good, dude." Emily squeals. She can hear Chloe in her mind's ear, echoing the squeal and cooing over the girl.

"Awesome! That's so, that's so awesome! Like, super awesome!" Both Beca and Katherine laugh at Emily's enthusiasm.

"Alright dear, I'm glad you're so happy, but maybe calm down a little?" And it's like the leggy brunette just realized how much of a puppy she was resembling. A really tall puppy.

After a brief check from the police officer, Emily's given the all-clear. She practically leaps to Beca's side. "Let's go, let's go! Oh, wait! Bye mom!" She bounces over to her mom to give her the biggest hug possible, managing to pick Katherine up, and then zips back. Beca grins. It reminds her of Chloe.

"Okay, so, you're really peppy. Not a bad thing or anything." Emily nods her head vigorously.

"I like being happy. But also, like, I'm pretty awkward. Sometimes I say weird things. My mom's my best friend." Beca really wants to laugh, because if there was ever an over-the-top mix of herself and Chloe, she imagines that she's looking at it right now. Super happy and super awkward. Minus her signature snark though. She briefly imagines what it'd be like to have little Chloes running around. Little boys and girls, with the bright blue eyes, or maybe her darker blues... Gotta have the hair though...

"Um, so, Beca, which direction do we walk in? Unless you just want to stand here for a while. That's totally cool, too. I like standing, and it's sunny. I like the sun." **_Oops, daydreaming_.** She clears her throat.

"Sorry. This way." She tilts her head back in the direction of the shop.

* * *

It's only about a five minute walk back to the place she was banished from, but Emily managed to trip twice, over what can only be explained as either thin air, or a spirit. As they're walking in, Emily trips this time on the threshold, bowling them both over. Beca lets out what she decides is the most undignified squawk to ever pass her lips.

While they try to untangle themselves, Beca hears Jesse and Cynthia Rose cackling. She had originally admired Emily's legs, but now they seemed like a curse. By the time they figure things out, Jesse has stumbled over, tears in his eyes. "That was beautiful, Becs." She flips him off.

"Whatever, dude." Patting herself down, she looks at Emily. "You okay?" Another enthusiastic nod.

"Yeah! I'm good. I'm totally good. Hi, I'm Emily." She gives a small wave to Jesse, bouncing up and down in place. Jesse grins at her.

"You're my hero." Beca rolls her eyes.

"Right. So, if you're done laughing at me, Emily is here because she needs a job. CR!" She leans by Jesse to look for her. Noticing she's ringing up a customer, Beca motions for the taller brunette to follow. Jesse goes off to do something else, wishing her luck.

Beca leans against the counter as the customer leaves, bidding her a good day.

"So what's going on, Beca? You falling for someone else now?" And she's pretty sure she can't roll her eyes any harder. She's never seen inside her skull before, so this is interesting.

"No," she grits out. "I found Bambi over here. She's looking for a job and since Lilly is as reliable as the ghost in storage," Beca pauses as she considers that maybe Lilly **is** the ghost in storage. "Anyways, Emily would be cool. She knows stuff about music. Her mom is a professional singer in a choir or something." Cynthia Rose bobs her head. Emily's nodding the whole time, silently bubbling with excitement.

"Yeah, I think I saw Lilly floating earlier," she mentions casually, and Beca isn't even surprised. The group turns around as the door opens, the little bell dinging to alert everyone to the presence of a customer. Only, it's Fat Amy.

"Hey everybody, I know you guys missed me, so I brought donuts, but I ate most of them." She comes up and places a nearly-empty box on the counter. "I didn't think you twig bitches would want more than one." And Emily's still nodding. Amy turns to look, craning her head up.

"We got a new Legs? Should I call the old Legs 'Jugs' now? 'Cause this one's kinda like a giraffe, yeah." The tall brunette smiles, awkward but genuine.

"How 'bout, 'Leggy Legs' and 'Leggy Jugs'? That sound good, yeah?" Beca's already shaking her head before Amy's finished talking.

"Let's focus here."

"What are we focusing on, Beca?" And it sounds almost weird, because Amy's sentences are usually wild, regardless of what's being discussed. She clears her throat.

"Emily's here for a job." A big smile from Bambi, a nod from Fat Amy.

"Good, good, but let's haze her first." Amy pounds her fist into an open palm. "I'll get the blindfold. CR, get your car." Beca groans.

"No, guys. Just, like, can we just do something normally for once?" Of course everybody is disagreeing. Jesse appears with some drumsticks.

"How about an audition?"

Beca opens her mouth to disagree, but Emily's already getting ready.

"Yeah, okay, I can do that. I'm writing something. So, it's not finished, but I got this." She shakes out her shoulders, takes a deep breath, and starts her song. A few seconds in, Jesse decides to add a beat, rapping his drumsticks against the counter. Cynthia Rose mumbles out an impressed, "Okay!" and adds some harmony, laying a lower vocal base for Emily's melody to build on.

As Emily's singing, Amy leans in to whisper, "She's singing about a flashlight, eh." Beca nods, but she's already hearing the potential of the song. She doesn't verbally reply, caught up in adding instrumentals in her head. Amy's muttering to herself, "I wonder if it's a sexy flashlight."

When Emily's done singing, she claps her hands together and smiles widely. "So, how did I do? Did I get in?" Beca can already see that Amy's getting ready to say something crazy, so she speaks over her.

"Yeah dude, I think you're good. But I didn't think you needed to do anything in the first place."

Jesse flips a drumstick. "You've got my vote too, but, Cynthia? What do you think?"

Cynthia Rose smiles. "Yo girl, you've got a nice voice!" Emily beams.

"Thanks. My mom and I sing together a lot."

After a celebratory five-way split of the last doughnut, Jesse shows Emily around the store, giving her the rundown of how everything works and where it is.

Beca checks her phone. Still no message from Chloe.

* * *

It's the next evening, and she's only received a few text messages from Chloe, mostly apologetic ones promising to make it up to her, briefly mentioning her day and why she's so tired.

She understands, because the redhead lead an active life before they ever stumbled into each other. Chloe had a life full of tutoring sessions, workouts, and lessons of her own, but the irrational and emotionally needy part of Beca is moping to high heaven. It's making her moody and she's already called Jesse 'fat' twice, so she's trying really hard to keep a lid on her crabbiness.

Putting on a purple plaid shirt over the gray tank Amy got her last year that has an elephant print on it (" _Because you're as delicate as one, yeah?_ "), she sends a short text to Chloe, figuring that it was best not to say too much and let her sullenness leak through. Beca sighs heavily, telling herself to stop.

The gang, including the rare appearance from Ashley, who brought Jessica, are at her and Jesse's apartment. There's music and Benji's magic tricks, which happen to occasionally turn into a mini-horror show when he even remotely turns in Emily's direction. Beca didn't think there could be more awkwardness, but somehow it's kinda cute between them. **_Where does he hide all of those quarters?_**

Watching them stutter to each other and accidentally release pigeons, Beca pops open a few beers in the kitchen. As she heads around to pass them out, the doorbell rings.

"Here Jess, take these. I'll go see who it is." Beca hands off the beers, keeping one for herself when she goes to get the door. She's just barely opened it when it's pushed aside firmly. The brunette quickly scoots back to avoid being hit.

"Whoa, Chloe! What are yo-" And Chloe's kissing her thoroughly before she can finish. It's a small miracle that she holds onto her beer.

Beca hears catcalls as Chloe kicks the door closed. She doesn't really have the presence of mind to do much else other than remain upright, which becomes harder as the redhead starts walking Beca backwards confidently, squeezing her hips. She's directing them like she's the one who lives here, knowing the pathway to Beca's room like it's ingrained. Chloe's definitely not being timid, licking into her mouth with firm, sure strokes.

They make it into the hallway before Beca remembers that there is a large group of people in the living room, and that they actually passed in plain sight of said group, comprised entirely of people that she has to see again. She's already hearing Fat Amy's teasing sex music sounds, "bow chicka wow wow, eh, Shawshank?" blaring on repeat. As they separate to take a breath, Beca tries to speak, but Chloe shakes her head. Her eyes are still closed, breathing heavily against the brunette's lips. "No. I've seen you once this week, Beca. We are **not** stopping."

"Wait, what happened to my beer?" She was sure she was just holding it. Instead of answering, Chloe just scowls at her and slowly backs her into the wall. Beca's eyes widen. "Chlo, we're still in the hallway." She's pretty sure that her anxious tone is just soaring over Chloe's head.

In fact, maybe she's not even listening, because she's getting closer, and humming something familiar that Beca can't place. Leaning in, she sings into Beca's ear.

" _Baby you got me like oooh_ " Oh. **Oh**. Now Chloe's pressing her body against hers, and they're standing flush. She's singing Rihanna's 'Love On the Brain', and it's _kinda_ really effective and totally distracting. Beca notices how intensely blue the redhead's eyes are as she moves back a bit. She winks and grabs Beca by her shirt, completely mesmerizing with that voice of hers.

" _And throw me against the wall._ " And Chloe's up against the wall now, pulling Beca to her, hiking a leg up to wrap around the brunette's thigh. It's the first time that Beca notices that the redhead is wearing everything from her little teacher fantasy, minus the glasses. Her throat suddenly feels really dry. She imagines there's a tumbleweed hanging out in there. **And she's still singing**.

" _Baby you got me like aaah, aah._ " Jesus, did Jesse forget to turn the air on? Beca's not sure if the thermostat is broken, because she feels like she's sweating. From the entrance of the hallway, Stacie pops her head in.

"Get it, Becs!" Her whistling and everyone's cheering snaps her out of it. She ignores Chloe's dangerous smirk.

"We- we uh, Chloe. People." Chloe nods, sliding her leg down and moving Beca off of her, but her hips are swaying, and so Beca knows that she's still not listening.

"Seriously, Chlo. Everybody is _right there_. Like twenty feet away." Stacie skirts by to get to the bathroom, her gigantic grin lighting up the hallway as she passes, like a boat in the fog. Her little whispered encouragement is not appreciated. She blocks Chloe's wandering hands, but it only seems to spur Chloe on.

" _Oh, and babe I'm fist-fighting with fire, just to get close to you._ " Oh, because Beca's accidentally playing out the song. She rolls her eyes.

"Chlo, maybe let's just go hang out in my room until everyone leaves."

Chloe's slinking backwards, finger hooked into a belt loop of Beca's shorts. " _Can we burn somethin', babe?_ " Beca's smiling, but she mutters about maybe burning the apartment down, because she knows she's going to be hearing about this for the next month. As she pushes the door to the brunette's room open, she croons, " _And I run for miles just to get a taste,_ " with **that wink** that makes Beca's heart flutter. She just manages to close the door, being pulled further into the room by a sultry, hypnotic redhead with eyes full of promise.

And she really should have seen it coming, because she's heard this song before, but as she's being shoved onto her bed, with the redhead climbing on top of her, she has the brilliant idea to ask, "Seriously, Chlo, what were you thinking?"

Chloe, being Chloe, takes the wonderful opportunity. She opens her mouth, belting out, " _Muust be loove on the brain._ " It's definitely loud enough to be heard throughout the entire apartment, and it's **definitely** sung completely accurate to the mood of the song. Beca honestly can't help the way her body reacts.

She squeezes the redhead's thighs, finally giving in to the megawatt smile now that they're (relatively) alone. Chloe bends forward, peppering her jaw with light kisses, giggling into her cheek, before singing quietly into her ear, " _yeah, muust be loove on the brain._ " Beca's heart can't take this kind of intense beating. She feels like she's being pulled out of her body by a string, twirled around the redhead's finger. Chloe sits up a little, looking down into the brunette's eyes and biting her lip.

"I'm sorry I've been so busy, Becs. Are you mad at me?" She looks a bit worried. Beca lets out a puff of air.

"No, I'm not mad. I just really missed you, dude." The redhead nods.

"I missed you, too. It was totes weird going from seeing you nearly everyday to once a week."

Beca knows that this is a serious kind of moment, because they're clearing the air and all, but she still has Chloe's singing on her mind, and the woman is still wearing the same outfit that she walked into the apartment in, and "it's insane how attractive you are."

"Hmm?" A giggle. "Thanks, babe." A wink.

Oops, she didn't mean to say it out loud. Oh well.

It's feeling like a 'Rihanna' kind of night, and so Beca's just going with the flow when she opens her mouth.

" _I've been everywhere, man, lookin' for someone,_ " and Chloe's elated surprise makes this moment worth every single second of teasing she'll have to face in the future, " _Someone who can please me, love me all night long._ " It's slower than the actual song, but the intimate way she's singing seems to be working for the redhead, whose eyes have darkened. Beca skates her palms up from Chloe's thighs to pull her blouse out of her skirt, meeting in the middle to pick at the buttons from the bottom up.

" _I've been everywhere, man, lookin' for you babe._ " She winks at Chloe as she makes her way up. " _Searchin' for you babe._ " She pushes the shirt off of Chloe's shoulders to grip her upper arms and pull her down. Biting the redhead's ear, she skips over to sing a different line.

" _Where have you been, all my life?_ " And Chloe's gasp is heated, a lovely side-effect of Beca's singing. As bright as the redhead's eyes were earlier, her eyes are positively burning now, windows to a raging fire, scorching Beca's skin where they land.

Sitting up quickly, she yanks her blouse the rest of the way off, tossing it aside carelessly, before crashing back into Beca like a wave. The moan that makes its way out of Chloe's throat is high, like she's been in pain and finally getting relief. The kiss is desperate and needy, two lost pieces finally reuniting.

The brunette runs her hands up to firm shoulders before twisting her wrists and scratching down. When Chloe gasps, Beca winds both arms around Chloe's waist to pull her in, wrapping her tongue around the redhead's. She feels the whimper in the pit of her stomach, tossing her about like a raft in a storm.

As she's getting ready to flip Chloe over, the redhead grabs Beca's hands and pins them above her. "My turn." A heated stare like a wildfire. She nods.

"Yes ma'am." A wet tongue down her neck, like an electric current.

"Good." Teeth nipping and biting down, like an earthquake.

There **really** isn't anyone like Chloe.

The redhead lets go to yank her up, kissing her like her life depends on it, pulling her clothes off like they're covered in ants, running her hands over her like she can't see. Her bra is off before she's finished blinking, and Chloe's got her hands full, her mouth full. And Beca's lungs can't feel full enough.

"God." She has to bite down to keep the moans from getting too loud, because she's suddenly aware of how quiet it seems to be outside of the room.

"I prefer Chloe, babe." Of course she'd say something like that. She tries to roll her eyes, but it's not quite working. They keep fluttering.

"You're my Aphrodite, so..." A whimper slips out as Chloe bites down on her shoulder. She sinks her hands into the fiery tendrils in front of her, tangling her fingers in them, trying to gasp as quietly as possible. The redhead looks up. Her eyes are like stars in the night, guiding Beca along.

"You think so highly of me." A hand runs down to dance along the top of her shorts. Chloe plucks at it with her finger, slipping in and running under. Beca presses the back of a hand into her eyes, murmuring, "Of course I do, I love you." And Beca isn't making any noise anymore, so she hears the unmistakable sound of Chloe gasping. Not that she would miss it anyways; it's pretty loud.

They both stop for a moment, two intertwined statues, a sculpture of disbelief. When the brunette dares to peek, she's nearly blinded by Chloe.

The sight before her reminds her of Christmas. So many sparkling lights, shining, everywhere. Snow falling, catching in the light, little bright dots. Families together. Roaring fires. Everything is so warm. And that's how she makes Beca feel. **Warm. Happy. Loved**. Beca feels like she's **home**. She reaches out to push some hair back from Chloe's face, gently running her fingers over the redhead's ear. Her soft smile seems to settle something within Chloe, who comes to life and moves forward like she's being propelled.

This kiss is new, filled with everything that makes their chemistry so explosive, filled with a stronger magic than before. Somehow, impossibly, it's a hotter burn, a searing white fire, pure plasma pouring thick and full over her.

"Say it again," Chloe whispers urgently in between solid caresses of her tongue.

She stutters out an "I love you," as the redhead kisses her neck, biting and soothing at a frantic pace as she works her way down her body, like she can't do it fast enough.

"I've waited so long to hear you to say that." Chloe pauses at her ribs, eyes closed like she's praying, brow furrowed like she's in pain, breathing Beca in like she's air. " **God** , **Beca**. I love you. I love you so much."

Her heart is pounding, thumping so strongly she feels it in her throat. The way Chloe said it, it sounded desperate. Like she's been holding it in forever. Beca traces her fingers along the redhead's cheeks, taking hold and bringing her in to connect their lips; to connect **them**.

Because this thing between them has felt this way from the start, a superstorm of feelings, an undeniable attraction, emotions so potent that she's been drunk since they met.

Chloe's been so patient, never seeming dissatisfied, always just so thankful that she gets to spend time with Beca, when it should be the other way around, because who in this world is this amazing?

Who is this smart, this funny, this beautiful, this silly? Who could possibly hold a candle to the passionate woman before her? She guides Chloe's hand back to her hips, nodding easily when their eyes lock. "I love you, Chloe." And there's that smile that she fell for.

Chloe's taking her time. Every movement is careful, unfaltering and dedicated. The redhead leaves small kisses, from her stomach to her ankles, as she undresses Beca. She stands up to shed her skirt, watching the brunette with gentle eyes. It's a look that Beca realizes Chloe has been giving her for a long time now.

As she returns to the bed, Chloe runs a hand up Beca's thigh reverently, leaving it resting on her hip bone, stroking with a barely-there touch. "I don't think I'll ever get tired of hearing you say that." Beca snorts.

"Good, 'cause I literally just started. I'll be saying it for a while." The redhead beams.

"Yeah?" An eyeroll.

"Yeah, Chlo." A giggle.

"How long?" Beca shrugs.

"I dunno. Maybe all of eternity? A long time, at any rate." And she's just being her usual self, but the redhead's not deterred in the slightest, smiling at her like she's a schoolgirl being flirted with by her crush.

"You're the cutest little badass, did you know that?" Beca tries to fight the smile, but it's already taken over.

"Whatever, just kiss me." Her girlfriend is chuckling, but they sink into each other.

Chloe's burying her fingers in Beca's hair, stroking through at a pace that matches her tongue; it's slow, languid like a lazy fire. She feels it winding her up, coiling in her belly. Her body, somewhat disconnected from her mind, drives her hands down Chloe's back to the swell of her backside. She toys with the lace there.

"I like you in red, Red." Chloe laughs.

"Red?" Baby blue eyes twinkle in amusement.

"Yeah. For obvious reasons." She runs her finger underneath the panties, stroking Chloe's hip.

"You sure have a lot of nicknames for me." The redhead nips at her neck, hands rubbing from Beca's chest down to pull a thigh up and wrap around her waist. Beca catches the tiny whimper just in time, chewing on her lip.

Not to be denied, Chloe tightens her grip on Beca's thigh and rolls her hips purposefully, jerking at the end, pushing the brunette up the bed a little. A hot gasp escapes, followed by a muted cry when she repeats the motion roughly. "Let me hear you, baby."

She picks up speed, fueled by Beca's fraying self-control. Chloe's yanking on her underwear like she's going to pull it off sideways, and the brunette decides she really doesn't care because she wants Chloe **now**. Around a moan, she breathes out, "Off. Take it off. I want you." And Chloe heeds the call.

Everything is heated and hazy, and the air is thick. She feels like she can barely see, with the atmosphere full of charged emotion. Chloe's gentle eyes are sharper now, focused. They stare at each other as she strips down then crawls onto the bed beside Beca. In perfect contrast to how heavy the room feels, their kiss is light and soft. Looking into Chloe's eyes, she's struck once again by how lucky she is.

"You're so beautiful, inside and out. I couldn't imagine my life without you." As she trails her fingers down the side of Chloe's face, the redhead turns to kiss her palm.

"I've never loved anyone as much as I've loved you. Please, don't leave me. I don't think I could take it." And Beca feels her eyes filling with tears, hot and ready to spill over. She pulls Chloe into her, to her lips and further into her heart.

"I love you." The redhead's hand drifts down between them.

Beca's no stranger to sex. She's had it before. Not in excess, but enough when the person she was with seemed to be a good match. So, she gets it. She understands the allure of the act, why people want it. She wants it, too. But she's never wanted it the way she's wanted anything with Chloe.

They've been burning up together since that day in Chloe's car four months ago, but they've never gotten this far, this naked, this vulnerable. Because Beca's still battling what she deems to be stupidity, telling her not to rush even though something floating in the universe is telling her that this thing with Chloe is meant to happen, and in no small measure.

There must be something about today, something in the air or in the water, that finally gives her the push she needs to admit to Chloe how she feels, a truth she's known for a while. And she's wonderfully rewarded with the kind of desperate desire that the redhead's been fighting since they met.

Chloe's fingers slip along her, dipping into wetness. As they softly stroke, Beca opens her legs wider to accommodate the redhead, whimpering when she takes advantage of the space and increases the pressure. "That's it. You're so beautiful, Becs." She pushes her hips into Chloe's hand in response.

Beca bites on the heel of her of her hand, flexing to press her open palm against her mouth when the redhead teases at her entrance, slipping in briefly. Nobody's asking any questions, but she's nodding and begging for Chloe. "Baby, please." And again, Chloe, always so kind and caring, acquiesces.

The sound she makes it a bit of a sigh of relief and a deep moan, fisting the duvet and gripping her hair. Chloe licks up the valley of her breasts, biting into her neck as her thrusts become harder. And Beca feels it, feels the tensing, the fire that's building around them, getting ready to burn everything down. She knows she isn't going to be able to stifle this one properly, so she submerges her fingers in Chloe's hair, bringing them together. Their mouths meet just in time.

So, yeah, Beca's had sex before. She's had orgasms before. She gets it. But as she climaxes now, with Chloe's fingers buried in her, accepting all of the sounds that the brunette's crying into her mouth, rolling with each moan and whimper and calling softly to Beca, she knows that she's never experienced it like this.

There's this bright explosion behind her eyes and an intense warmth settling in her chest. Something in this moment feels so **right** that it's almost intolerable. It feels like her soul is leaving her body, and for a minute, she's scared. But then she can see again, and there in front of her, like a lighthouse, like the stars, like the sun and like **home** , Chloe's eyes are watching her. Watching her with a look that's been unwavering, unchanging, nearly indestructible. Constant. Chloe, for the longest time, has been watching Beca with **love**. And she **finally** gets it.

Lacing their fingers together, Beca sighs. "I love you, Chloe Beale." And the smile that she fell for is the brightest thing she's ever seen.

* * *

 **AN: Songs: Rihanna - Love On the Brain & Where Have You Been**


	6. 6-7 Months

**Pat pat pat pat** _._ Beca ducks down behind a concrete barrier, watching as bright splotches of paint bloom on the wall opposite her. Taking a deep breath to calm herself, she runs in a crouch along the barrier, checking for signs of the enemy before making a dash to a nearby car. As she listens, Cynthia Rose sneaks over, a little dusty but no worse for wear.

"So, Cap', what's the plan?", she asks as she checks her ammo. Beca lifts the visor of her helmet to wipe the amassed sweat. She gestures with her whole hand, motioning towards a building covered in different colors of paint.

"Meet up with Benji. I'm going to go find Ashley." Cynthia Rose nods.

They both freeze for a minute as a flurry of paintballs goes off, splattering a mountain of water drums. Jesse hides on the other side, a strip of red cloth tied around his forehead like Rambo. She and CR make eye contact with him. Beca holds up three fingers, counting down.

As they provide cover fire, Jesse wildly shoots in the direction of the incoming fire, sprinting towards them with a guttural yell. He makes a crazed dive as he nears the car, leaping with his arms out and legs straightened. Beca barely manages to squeeze herself against the vehicle in time to avoid being tackled.

"Dude! I'm on **your** team!" Jesse pats himself, feeling for wounds as Beca huffs.

"I'm alive! I'm really alive!"

"I'm considering culling you from the team myself, Swanson," Beca grumbles. Shaking her head, she twirls her finger in a circle.

"Regroup at base." The others nod. From across the field, there's a very lively taunting.

"Your days are numbered, Mitchell!" It's Stacie. The **traitor**.

Okay, so maybe they had to split the teams equally. But for her to pick **Aubrey's** team? She was on the hit list. Just like her girlfriend, and the Tasmanian.

Beca's team consisted of Jesse, Cynthia Rose, Lilly, Ashley, and Benji. Aubrey had Chloe, Emily, Jessica, Stacie, and Amy. The brunette briefly pouts as she thinks about the redhead being on the opposite team, but then she remembers last week's betrayal.

 _She doesn't want to. She really doesn't want to. Maybe she can just stay here for a month. In her bedroom. She'll go into the rest of the apartment when Jesse goes to work._

 _"Beca, stop being a big baby. Come on." Chloe finishes buttoning up her shirt and tugs on Beca's arm. She decides to slump over onto the redhead's lap._

 _"I don't wanna!" She knows she sounds like a child, but her friends are so annoying. Chloe sighs, running her fingers through the brunette's hair. "It won't be that bad. They'll tease you, you tell them you just got laid, show me off, the end." Beca eyes her._

 _"That's like describing the Plague as 'a little sickness', Chloe." Chloe rolls her eyes and gets up, ignoring Beca's protests when her head is unceremoniously dumped back onto the bed._

 _"I hope you're not comparing getting laid to the Plague." Turning around at the door, she looks at the brunette with her bedroom eyes._

 _"The sooner we get out there, the sooner we can come back, Mitchell." And Beca can feel how hotly Chloe says her surname, loading it with heated intentions. There's a light knock on the door. The redhead opens it to find Jessica standing there with a blush, carefully avoiding looking into the room._

 _"Uh, guys, Amy is about to come barging in here, so um, do you want to come join us?" She can hear the death knell, slowly chiming its deep, dark sound. Beca exhales noisily, slapping her hands on her thighs, and stands up._

 _"Okay. Thanks Jessica." Chloe pats her friend on the shoulder, an amused smile on her face._

 _"You don't need to look so dang gloomy, Becs." The redhead just giggles at the deadpan expression she receives._

 _The hallway really isn't that long, barely long enough for an internal monologue, but as she's making her way out - being dragged, practically - to the living room, she's already hearing the responses from her friends. Amy is the first to speak._

 _"Boom chicka wow wow, eh, Shawshank?" And maybe she should play the lottery, because she's good at guessing, apparently._

 _"Beca, I didn't know you could hit notes that high. You've got some nice pipes, girl," Cynthia Rose says. Beca isn't even finished sighing before someone else opens their mouth._

 _"I'm more impressed with Chloe. You have to tell me your secrets, because from what I heard, you did a very good job." Stacie's wolfish smile matches Chloe's pleased wink perfectly. Beca feels her face flush. She crosses her arms._

 _Noticing her getting grumpy, the redhead leans in, giving her a peck. She whispers into Beca's ear. "Becs, you getting all sulky and embarrassed is turning me on." She goes in for a kiss. The brunette flies back out of shock, but Chloe is too busy laughing to really care. Beca narrows her eyes._

 _"I'm so going to get you back for that, Beale." The challenging wink she gets in return makes her want to smile, but she can't. It's war._

 _"I'll be waiting, honey."_

And so war it is. They make their way into the building, checking for Aubrey's team as they go. Benji is on the second floor, looking through his rifle's scope. He holds up his thumb, signaling that he doesn't see anyone. Beca glances around the room, finding Lilly missing. She's not really surprised though. Lilly had whispered into Beca's ear at the very beginning, promising that she would "take out the trash", before essentially dematerializing in front of her eyes.

"Benji. Status?", the brunette asks as she moves to stand next to him. He doesn't turn, instead speaking as he slowly pans his gun from side to side.

"All clear currently. Chloe was last spotted going towards the junk yard about 4 minutes ago, I lost track of her after that." He points at an area that is full of junked cars. "Stacie went in that direction as well. Aubrey hasn't been seen. Jessica is in the windowless building." Beca looks at the building in the distance. The upper floor is exposed. Beca hums.

"And Amy?"

"I saw Amy being tailed by Lilly, but haven't seen her since. That was right after I set up, Captain." She nods.

"Good. Lilly will take care of her. Any shots fired?" He answers affirmatively. She turns around to address the other two.

"Alright guys. Cynthia Rose, I have a feeling someone will be coming to check this place out, so stay here with Benji. I'm guessing it'll be about five to ten minutes." She points at Jesse. "You're with me, Swanson. We're going to find Ashley." He smiles creepily, causing Beca to cock an eyebrow.

"What's wrong with your face, dude?" His smile gets wider.

"You're so cool with your 'captain voice', Beca."

"My what? This is my regular voice." Jesse shakes his head.

"No no, this has less sarcasm in it. I like it." Cynthia Rose agrees wholeheartedly.

"I'm glad we made you the leader, Becs." The brunette groans.

"Not you too, CR." Rolling her eyes, she strides from the room, motioning for her partner to follow.

They head east, running quickly but quietly, on the lookout for the other team. Out of the corner of her eye, she spots Stacie's tall form slink by, followed by Chloe. They're unaware of the duo. Just as she's about to tell Jesse, he uses two fingers to point to his eyes, then over to a dumpster, where Ashley is hiding. She's peeking around it and into the windowless building. Ash falls back onto her backside just as a splotch of paint hits the dust in front of her. From inside the building, Beca can hear Emily's voice.

"Sorry! I mean, I meant to hit you, but still! Sorry!" They can hear Jessica's quiet laughter and then her shushing Emily. There's a softer apology after.

Rolling her eyes with a smile, she motions for Jesse to join Ashley and infiltrate.

"You guys take the building and then regroup. I'm gonna go do some recon." Quickly waving to Ashley and bumping fists with Jesse, she turns back the way she came.

Beca tucks her gun into her chest as she darts between buildings. She curses under her breath as she realizes she's lost sight of the traitors. Just as she's about to go in a different direction, she hears some scuttling nearby. Thinking on her toes, she crawls under a car just in time to see Stacie's boots pass. Beca internally commends the tall brunette on her choice of footwear.

After enough time has passed, Beca wriggles out from beneath the car and stalks after her victim. She spots her crouched behind a stack of old tires. Stacie has a pistol clutched to her chest, another strapped to her thigh. Her hair is braided, and she's basically Angelina Jolie in _Tomb Raider_. She's so focused in front of her that she doesn't notice Beca coming up until it's too late.

With a bright green splat to the chest, Stacie's out for the count.

"Damn it, Short Stack. I guess being tiny has its advantages, huh. I didn't hear you at all. You have tiny feet. Like a mouse. Tiny, tiny, mouse feet," she grouses with a smile. Beca rolls her eyes.

"My height has nothing to do with you sucking, dude. Maybe listen out better next time. I probably could have been banging on a trash can and you wouldn't have noticed." Stacie bats her hand dismissively at Beca as she gets up, commenting on how good her breasts look with green paint on them.

"Stace, uh... You're wearing a vest." Stacie shrugs and maintains her opinion.

As she calls out that she's been shot, Beca fades into the shadow of an alley, watching for Chloe. The hairs on the back of her neck rise, but it's too late.

"You got lucky with Stacie, but I'm always watching you, Becs." It's both romantic and a threat, and Beca grins at the way her heart races.

"Yeah, I don't really know if I'm scared or turned on here, Beale." She can practically feel Chloe's body heat behind her. She stays still, not wanting to get shot. Beca can't help the laugh that comes out, though. Chloe hums.

"Well, either way, you're getting wet, Mitchell." Beca thinks she kinda digs this dangerous flirting they're engaging in. Sensing an opportunity, she plays into it, knowing how much the redhead enjoys banter of this kind. She impresses herself with an authentic-sounding sexual whine.

"You're really good at making me wet, Chlo. Are you going to take me from behind?", she coos. And as she hears the way Chloe's breath hitches behind her mask, Beca rolls to the side, turning to knock Chloe's sub-machine gun out of her hand with the butt of her rifle. The redhead sits back out of shock, inciting Beca to sit astride Chloe and trap her upper arms under her knees. She brings her rifle to Chloe's vest and fires in the middle.

"Oops, I guess you're the one that's all wet, huh?" Beca smirks as she pulls her helmet off. With a wink, she puts her rifle off to the side to plant a sweaty kiss on the bewildered redhead's mask.

"You really **are** a badass," Chloe breathes out as she takes her mask off. Little wisps of hair curl and cling to her forehead, moist from sweating. Beca mutters a "damn right," as she moves to get up, but the redhead pulls her back down by the shoulders, connecting their lips more firmly. Beca lets out a squeak of surprise, but she doesn't deny the tongue demanding entrance. She does jump a little at the determined hands squeezing inside the back pockets of her jeans, though.

"I didn't know you liked being a loser so much, Chloe." She receives a quick smack on the behind for her comment, but it's followed by a rather thorough kiss and a sharp thrust of hips. In the space of Beca's gasping, Chloe kisses down the side of her neck, roughly gripping low on her waist as she pushes her hips up into Beca.

"I am perfectly okay with losing, because that was hot." Beca can definitely see how much Chloe enjoyed it. She clears her throat as Chloe kisses her shoulder.

"So, um, I thought you were all like, uh, a... a martial art-artist." And **wow** , Chloe really liked it. Even her responding hum sounds sexual.

"Yeah. I totes wasn't expecting you to flirt back so well, you little minx," the redhead mumbles, distracted with running her hands up and down Beca's torso under her shirt. With a nip to her ear, Chloe leans her head back onto the ground, staring into the brunette's eyes heatedly. "And I had no idea you could disarm me like that." Beca smiles, pleased as punch.

They get up, dusting off and making themselves presentable. Chloe calls out, heading towards the entrance. Beca checks her ammo and returns to the fray, determined. Hot girlfriend or not, there was a battle to win.

* * *

As the day wears on, the numbers dwindle. An hour later, there are only four people left: Beca, Aubrey, Lilly, and, surprisingly, Emily.

Beca takes a deep breath. She's been at a standstill with the blonde for about 15 minutes now, and she needs to pee. The brunette isn't surprised that Aubrey made it this far. She remembers Chloe telling her about the blonde's firearms prowess.

"C'mon, Posen, let's get this over with. I'm hungry after all the ass I've kicked today." A paintball whizzes by.

"I won't take anything less than excellence, Beca. I won't quit, and I won't accept you throwing the match because you can't handle your burning need to eat like that best friend of yours." Beca laughs.

"You mean Jesse? The one you totally have a, what was it you said that I have for Chloe? A 'toner'?" She snorts at the term. Aubrey makes a noise, and it's kinda maybe a shriek.

" **I do not**!" It's a little vehement, a little quick, a little too guilty. Beca hums.

"Yeah, I don't think I believe you there, Blondie." She can practically hear the steam before Aubrey puffs like a kettle that's ready.

"Come out here and fight me! I am **not** enamored with that boyish man!" In her surprise, Beca expels a snicker that turns into a round of boisterous laughter. She lifts her visor to wipe a tear away.

"His boyish good looks work for him, though. Wouldn't you agree?" As she's caught up in her teasing, she feels it. A wet thud on her shoulder, a blooming pink flower. Then she's ducking as the rest of the paintballs come flying from a direction that is decidedly **not** Aubrey.

"Sorry! Sorry! So sorry! But yay!" Emily dashes onto the scene, looking both embarrassed and excited through her mask. Beca groans.

"Man, this is what I get for trying to help Jesse out." Aubrey walks up, her rifle resting on her shoulder and a fist on her hip. Beca grits her teeth at the smirk that's revealed as the blonde removes her helmet.

"You're out, Mitchell."

She lets out a colorful expletive, announcing that she's been shot. Beca grimaces at their celebratory cheers. As she's walking away, she hears the women scream. Turning around, she sees them covered in patches of bright red paint.

"What the hell?"

Lilly emerges from where she had been laying on the ground, her whole body the same color as the dust. Sitting up at the waist like a mummy from a sarcophagus, twin pistols crossed over her chest , Lilly opens her eyes. Her haunting whisper carries over the distance between Beca and the others.

"The deed has been done. We have taken the trash out, Captain. Glory to the victors."

And what else can anyone do but nod?

* * *

"Chlo. Chlo. Chloe. Chlllooooeeee." Beca's poking her, but she's not responding. She decides to slump on top of her instead of lying next to her on the bed.

Chloe's reading something in Russian, occasionally muttering a word or sentence out loud. It's hot, but she's already accosted her a few times. The redhead huffs.

"Yes, Beca?" She can tell Chloe's annoyed, but in an affectionate way.

"My back hurts. Heellllpp meeee." Beca pouts, feeling how tense her back is. After the paintball excursion yesterday, she's a little achy. She resettles next to Chloe. A hand skates up her back, softly stroking under her shirt. The brunette lets her face plant into the pillow, sighing in gratitude.

"Dude, that feels really good." Chloe chuckles as she moves to sit on Beca's thighs.

"Thanks, **dude**." She readies a snippy reply, but what actually comes out is a moan when Chloe begins rubbing her hands with more pressure up both sides of Beca's spine.

She means to say more, to keep the casual conversation going, but her mind feels like it's full of mud or something else similarly thick and cloying as the redhead works her thumbs into particularly resilient knots. Eventually, Chloe reaches a point where she can't go higher properly, hindered by the shirt that's bunched up under Beca's arms. She pats the brunette's back.

"Might need to take this off so that I can get the rest, Becs." Beca mumbles in reply.

"Mmkay." Chloe giggles as Beca sluggishly struggles out of her shirt. She pulls it up by the collar, leaving it there and going limp as it gets stuck.

"Do you need help, or are you just going to lie there and slowly suffocate?" Chloe's voice is filled with fond amusement. Beca shrugs.

"You can _totes_ help, or maybe y'know, if you **don't** love me, you can leave me here to die." The redhead laughs.

"You're the one that wanted a massage, sweetheart. Unless you're all good now, hmm?" And Beca's pouting, but Chloe can't see it anyways. She nods instead.

"Yes, please help. I'll be good." Chloe giggles, a little trill of humor. As the redhead pulls the shirt the rest of the way off, she gasps.

"Oh Beca, what is **this**?" She places her fingers on the back of Beca's shoulder. The brunette flinches.

"Ow! What the heck?" Chloe mumbles a soft apology, placing a kiss on the mark and commenting on its size.

"It's a really big bruise, Becs." She doesn't remember being shot with a paintball there, but it could've been from her dodging and rolling.

"It'll heal. Just like, don't punch me." The redhead swats her other shoulder. Beca puffs out a little laugh.

"So, Aubrey totally says she doesn't like Swanson, but I think she might be into him. She was all 'I am defo _not_ into your handsome best friend with the boyish good looks!' and junk." Chloe hums.

"Aubrey definitely wouldn't talk like that, but I think she likes him more than she's admitting as well. Did you see them the other night? She was laughing at his jokes." Beca snorts.

 _Jesse leans closer to Aubrey, turning his body in her direction. She's sitting next to him, drink in hand. Beca's trying to focus beyond the really distracting sensation of Chloe running her fingernails up and down the back of her neck._

 _"I'm really glad you could make it, Aubrey." Jesse smiles widely. Aubrey takes a sip of her drink._

 _"As am I, Jesse. I'm thankful that Chloe invited me. It's good that our two groups are blending." Chloe blows Aubrey a kiss. Beca pretends not to be watching, knowing he would get more nervous. The blonde seems relaxed, but Jesse's leg is jumping. He wipes his hands on his thighs._

 _Out of nowhere, he blurts out something that makes Beca internally cringe so hard that her eye twitches._

 _"So, what do you call an out-of-control, unpredictable photographer?" He doesn't even wait before he's answering himself._

 _"A loose Canon."_

 _And, to her immense disbelief, Aubrey Posen laughs._

"His jokes were dumb as fu-"

"Beca!" The brunette snickers.

"Fine. They were lame." She groans as Chloe rubs along her neck firmly.

"Not the point. What do you want to do? Should we go ahead with operation 'Get Aubs And Jessie Together Because They're Totes Cute And It'd Be The Tits If My Best Friend And Your Be-" And now Beca interrupts.

"Chloe, I love you, but we need to work on that name. That was **terrible**." Because the point of an operation name is to _not_ give away your intentions, but it seems Chloe didn't get that memo. Beca opens her mouth to say as much.

"Mmm. Baby, don't even." Her mouth snaps shut. She can feel Chloe's rumble of laughter.

"I was going to agree with you, actually. We should go get lunch or something." Chloe peppers her back with kisses before sliding off and lying on her side. Beca turns to face her, intertwining their hands.

"It would be cool if Jesse found someone who makes him happy." She sniffs. "Plus, I think Aubrey's seriousness is something that would help him. He really is a giant kid." Beca smiles fondly.

"Aubs could really use someone to help her unwind. Sometimes she's a little too..." Chloe drifts off, thinking. Beca wants to say something about sticks being in places where they shouldn't be, but she bites her tongue, winking when Chloe levels a look at her. "A little too **uptight**."

"Maybe we should put them in a bear trap together. I hear that near-death experiences are pretty bonding." Chloe yanks their linked hands back behind her, pulling her into a rough kiss. The redhead's other hand sweeps under her waist, coming around and bringing them flush against each other. She smirks into Beca's mouth, breathing out a, "don't be so dramatic, Mitchell."

"Um, excuse you, you weren't the one who almost died." The redhead's tinkling laughter makes her smile. She bites Chloe's lip in retaliation. She sees baby blue eyes darken.

"You're lucky I think you're so freaking cute." A giggle slips out, and she wrinkles her nose as she frowns.

"Ew, I am **not**."

"Hmm, I dunno, Becs. That giggle was pretty darn cute." Chloe presses a kiss to the tip of Beca's nose, smoothing out the wrinkling. "I love you."

Beca smiles widely. "I love you, too."

* * *

Chloe: _Operation Besties Love is a-go, Becs._

Beca: _**I don't think I like that name either, Chloe.**_

Chloe: _Oh my gosh, Beca. It's not that important._ Beca huffs.

Beca: _**It still sucks. We're leaving now. Meet you at the café. Love you.**_

"Jesse, let's go get lunch." She pokes him with her thigh as they sit on the sofa. He grunts.

"I dunno. Where are we going?" And Beca isn't really going to give him a choice, because she's already told Chloe they were headed out.

"Lunch. Café. You're driving, up." She tugs on his arm, attempting to drag him as he turns into dead weight. "Dude, don't make me have to threaten your movie collection." With the way he gasps, you'd think she personally insulted him.

"You wouldn't." His tone is very reminiscent of an elderly woman whose house smells like old newspapers and porcelain dolls.

"I definitely will if you say anything with **that** voice again." With an aggrieved sigh, he gets up and grabs his keys off of the coffee table. Beca exhales in relief.

* * *

"Oh, look! It's Chloe!" Beca makes a face at how fake she sounds, but thankfully Jesse is none the wiser. He does freeze when he spots Aubrey, though. Beca nudges him with her shoulder. "You okay?" That seems to unstick him.

"Yeah! Yeah, why wouldn't I be okay?" She shrugs, hiding her smirk by bringing some hair over her shoulder. The loose waves hide the wink she throws Chloe.

"Alright, dude. Let's go sit with them." Ignoring his weird sounds, she goes to join them on the deck.

"Hi Aubrey. Hi Chlo." Beca bends down to give Chloe a quick kiss, skirting her nose into Chloe's hair to briefly breathe her in. They share a smile as she sits, scooting her chair closer to her girlfriend. Jesse sits down somewhat awkwardly, greeting the two women. The redhead leans forward.

"Hey guys!" Chloe's cheery greeting helps to calm both Aubrey and Jesse. A waiter comes over to get drink orders. Both she and Chloe get water since they plan to ditch their friends. Pulling her phone out under the table, she sends a discreet message to Stacie asking for a phone call, divulging the plan. The redhead picks up her water to take a sip, hiding her amusement.

Beca: _Call me. I need an excuse to leave Jesse alone with Aubrey._

Stacie: _**And what's in it for me?**_

Beca: _The joy of seeing our friends get together?_

Stacie: _**Uh-huh.**_

Beca: _C'monnn!_

"Huh, Stacie's calling." As soon as she has the phone to her ear, Stacie's speaking.

" _You owe me, Mitchell. I'm working._ " Beca snorts.

"Hi Stacie! **Of course** I have time for you! What do you need help with?" It sounds terribly insincere. Out of the corner of her eye, she can see Chloe spit back into her glass, hiding her laughter by pretending that she inhaled water.

" _Tell me, how amazing is sex with Chloe? I'll bet she's good with her tongue, hm_ _m_ _?_ " Beca's eyes go wide as she chokes on air, but before anyone at the table can question her, she's speaking on autopilot.

"Oh wow! Yeah, I can come right now." And the response is lightning quick.

" _Is that what you t_ _ell_ _your girlfriend? Because she seems like the type of woman who could get you off pretty fast._ " Why didn't she call Lilly?

"Bye! I'll see you there." She hangs up in the middle of Stacie's cackling. She knows from the redhead's sly smirk that she heard the other side of the phone conversation. Beca grimaces, and it's really not faked.

"So, Stacie needs help. I have to go, sorry guys." Jesse's brow furrows.

"At the lab?" Beca nods.

"What would she need help with that you could do?" And okay, Stacie is a genius, but Beca is still offended.

"Flat... tire." Aubrey seems unconvinced.

" **You're** going to help her with the flat?" Seeing that she's struggling to come up with another barely passable lie, Chloe jumps in to save her.

"Do you want me to go with you? I know how to change a tire." Beca starts nodding as soon as Chloe opens her mouth. She stands up, shoving her things into her pockets, drinking some water before passing her uncontaminated glass to the redhead.

"So, we'll just head out and see what we can do to help Stacie. You two stay and enjoy lunch. C'mon, Chlo." She throws a five on the table, hurrying to leave before anyone can become more suspicious.

* * *

"Do you even know how to change a flat tire, Beca?"

"Shut up." So maybe she doesn't really.

"It's okay, I still think you're totes badass."

"Thanks for trying, Chlo." The redhead smiles brightly.

"No problem!" Beca chuckles.

"What do you want to do now? I'm actually kinda hungry." Chloe puts a finger to her chin, humming as they walk along.

"Want to grab something, and then you can give me another lesson?" She perks up at that.

"Yeah, that sounds great." Beca reaches down to lace their fingers, giving Chloe's a little squeeze.

* * *

Beca taps her foot to keep time with the song she's teaching Chloe. She nods along as the redhead strums, snapping her fingers to provide an audible beat.

"Good, good. You've improved a lot, Chlo. Shake your wrist out though, I can see you're a bit tense." Chloe passes the guitar over as she flexes her hands and takes a drink from her water bottle. She leans back against the couch.

"Play me something. It's been a while. I want to hear someone who's actually good at this." The redhead laughs at herself. Beca rolls her eyes.

"You're doing just fine, Chloe. Though yeah, I am **kind of** a prodigy." She dodges Chloe's attempted shove, snickering at her. Sitting up straighter on her stool, she plays a couple of random chords. "Any requests?"

Chloe shrugs. "Woo me, Becs." Beca smirks and bows her head.

"Your wish is my command."

She knows that this song is really cheesy and romantic, but it's right up Chloe's alley.

" _I found a love, fooor me. Darlin' just dive right in, and follow my leead."_ Looking into Chloe's eyes, the brunette knows she made the right choice.

" _Well I found a giiirl, beautiful and sweet. I never knew you were the someone, waiting for mee._ " And maybe it's a good fit for how she feels, too.

"' _Cause we were just kids when we felll in looove, not knowing whaat it was._ " Chloe bites her lip, baby blue eyes so glassy and bright.

She strums her way through Ed Sheeran's 'Perfect', winking at the redhead to keep herself from becoming too emotional and crying all over everything. The redhead looks like she might, though. As she finishes the song, she drifts off, softly singing, " _You look perfect, tonight._ "

Beca puts the guitar down next to Chloe, leaning the neck against the seat of the couch. She gets up, placing her hand on the redhead's thigh as she goes in for a kiss. Pulling back a little, she asks, "Was that acceptable?"

Chloe's studying her, head tilted and silent. Her eyes are still glassy, full of emotion. She places her hand on top of Beca's, stroking softly as she takes a stuttering breath. Closing her eyes, she exhales deeply, as if she's fighting tears.

"Yeah. That was wonderful, Beca." She moves to sit next to Chloe on the couch, using her other hand to brush a lock of fiery hair back, tracing the shell of the redhead's ear.

"You okay?" Chloe nods, biting her lip again before deciding to lean in and join their lips. The redhead brings both of her hands to cup Beca's cheeks, holding them in the kiss as a tear makes its way out. Beca looks at her. Chloe shakes her head.

"Good tears. Everything about the way you make me feel is good."


	7. 9 Months

She's trying to focus. She really is. Emily's excitedly chattering about her song, gesturing with her hands, her arms, her whole body as she tries to convey her vision. Jesse's bopping his head along to something playing over the store's speakers as he stacks some merchandise. Cynthia Rose is sitting next to Bambi on the couch, nodding at the tall brunette's words. And Beca can't bring her foggy mind into the present. She's eyeballs-deep in her daydream. Because Chloe is just a force that can't ever be ignored.

 _"C-Chloe." She grits her teeth at how breathless she sounds, but is helpless to prevent it. "Chlo." Beca tries exhaling through her nose to minimize the noise fighting to escape, like a river pushing at a dam, searching for any crack. Chloe hums, completely distracted._

 _"Yes, Beca?" And it's only two words, but it sounds loaded. Nothing about those words has anything to do with moisture, yet even in the maze that her mind has suddenly turned into she knows that the question sounds remarkably wet. The redhead licks up the column of her neck, skirting her nose along to Beca's ear, breathing hotly into it, "What do you... need?"_

 _She wanted to say that they needed to stop, that they're in the storage room at work, that Cynthia Rose walked down the hallway to go to the restroom, that there's **a ghost** in here, but the only thing that comes out is a squeak as Chloe yanks the top of her jeans by her belt loops, first down and then towards the redhead's hips. The noise seems to encourage her, because she slides her hands around and under her pants, squeezing her ass firmly. And even though Beca's got her lips pressed together, her body betrays her, letting a high whimper slip out as her head falls back against the wall. The redhead chuckles._

 _"What's wrong, darling? Cat got your tongue?" Beca scrunches her nose, wanting to protest being called something as cheesy as 'darling' but refusing to open her mouth whilst she's being assaulted. The amount of joy that the redhead's getting from basically steamrolling over her willpower is only slightly annoying, because a happy Chloe is a good thing. A fun thing. She decides to let her mind take a break from the stress of trying to function while her girlfriend is actively melting it._

 _Beca pushes Chloe off of her. Ignoring the beginnings of a question and a frown on the redhead's face, she roughly shoves her back again, directing her to a work table at the back of the room. She's not listening to anything Chloe might be saying as she presses her hands to the back of the redhead's thighs underneath her dress. Chloe gets the hint and places her palms flat on the table, lifting herself slightly to sit on it. When her hands come to rest on Beca's shoulders, the brunette leans forward, forcing hands to find the surface of the table again. As soon as Chloe opens her mouth to speak, Beca joins their lips. With a soft sigh, the redhead accepts the tongue demanding entrance._

 _She loves this, loves that Chloe can go from being the aggressor to so passionately submissive. She loves that Chloe can flirt and tease her to the point of setting the room on fire like they're lighting a freaking pyre one minute and be sweet and innocent the next. Chloe tilts her head back and her hair falls over her shoulder like a fiery cascade as they take a breath. The sight of those bright blue eyes closing in pleasure tears at something inside of Beca, a set of tightly wound strings that have been steadily fraying. Her hands feel like they're submerged in boiling water, a scalding burn so hot it feels cold. Seeking relief, she runs her palms up the redhead's torso, from hips to anchor at the back of her neck. Eyes flutter open, seeking her own midnight blues._

 _"Baby?" And it's so soft, so caring, so concerned. It sets off her heart, turning it from a stammering into a jackhammering because Chloe's always, always making sure she's okay. She's always putting Beca and her lingering emotional hangups first. Beca shakes her head, blinking away a tear as she brings their lips together._

 _Chloe lies down, taking Beca with her by the front of her shirt. She indulges the redhead for a minute, then breaks away to kiss down her body, slowly slinking down to hips, where her hands have brought the hem of the dress up. Beca gently kneads Chloe's hips, pressing an open-mouthed kiss to the ridge, gliding her tongue along it. Looking up at the redhead, she gives her a little wink, pulling on the lace of Chloe's panties with her teeth. Beca chuckles when she expels a muted gasp. At the questioning look, Beca briefly grazes her lips over the junction of Chloe's legs._

 _"You're always doing things for me. Always asking how I am, how I feel. You're always taking care of everybody else. I'm thankful for that. I'm happy. Let me take care of you." She moves her hands purposefully over hips, hooking fingers into lace as she skims her nails down._

 _The room around them seems full of noise and completely silent all at once. Beca feels the body beneath her straining to stay still as she works the underwear off. Pausing at Chloe's knee, she quickly pecks it before finishing her task and standing again. The redhead sits up, worrying her lip as she runs her foot up and down Beca's leg. Though she's taller than the brunette, even on the table, Chloe still manages to look up at her through her lashes. The coy look works really well, Beca muses. She pushes red strands back over Chloe's shoulder, sweeping her cheek with it on the backswing and bringing them together again when she steps closer. As she caresses her tongue with firm strokes, the redhead's breathing catches until it breaks. When Chloe tilts back to inhale, Beca sinks down, pulling her hips closer and pressing a solid kiss to the curls at the apex of her thighs._

 _Chloe whimpers loudly._

 _It's a broken, almost pained sound. A grunted "a-ah" that Beca feels slithering all the way down her body like a drug, burning through her veins and lighting her up. That same electric heat short circuits her brain, and she moves on animal instinct, licking hungrily. Hands that have found their way into her hair flex and clutch sporadically, lightly tugging and pushing. Sneaking a glance at Chloe, she sees her girlfriend still sitting up, head lolled to the side, eyes shut tightly and mouth barely open. A particularly fervent stroke of her tongue forces a choked exclamation, a quietly uttered "fuck" followed by a deep moan. Beca finds herself echoing the sound as the redhead leans back on a hand and her hips start bucking._

 _She glides her hand up a leg to perch Chloe's thigh on her shoulder, giving her more room. Hazily, she hears someone outside talking. The combined thrill of excitement and fear pushes her forward and she quickly thrusts two fingers into Chloe, eager to bring her girlfriend to climax before they have to stop. The redhead seems to appreciate the enthusiasm from the way she spreads her legs and rolls her hips into Beca's mouth. Her head falls back and she lets out a wet moan._

 _"Jesus, Beca. I'm so close." And it's breathy and whispered, a barely spoken utterance, but Beca hears it loudly as it reverberates inside of her chest. She twists her fingers through slick heat, curling and stroking. Beca laves her tongue over a sensitive nub, drawing it into her mouth and grazing her teeth over it. She maintains her rhythm but increases the pressure when she feels Chloe trembling. Her body, wound tight like a coil, finally snaps as it gives in to pleasure. And the sight of Chloe Beale climaxing is something to behold._

 _Eyelids fluttering closed before staying shut tightly, a brilliant blush sprawling from her cheeks to her chest. Mouth open in a silent cry before closing teeth over a bottom lip plump from ardent kisses. Both hands pressed on the table behind her because one isn't enough to prevent her from buckling. Nails digging into the wood of the table as hips push and raise._

 _Chloe in the throes of release is like a sculpture in relief. Prominent, vivid, and incomprehensibly beautiful._

 _After a minute of being completely overtaken by awe, Beca blinks what feels like maybe a hundred times. She exhales deeply and stands up, bringing Chloe's panties with her. She slowly slides them back on as the redhead recovers, kissing her way up. Beca raises her wrist to wipe her mouth, but her girlfriend pulls her down, licking along her lips, spilling her moans into the brunette. She honestly feels her knees give for a second, having to grab onto the table. They both chuckle before Chloe lets her go, opting to pass her fingers through her own hair as she expels a tired breath. Beca feels her insides twist at how dark the redhead's eyes still are._

 _"You, Beca." She quirks an eyebrow when Chloe doesn't elaborate._

 _"Me? What about me? Aside from being awesome." Beca bites the inside of her cheek when Chloe purses her lips like she's fighting a smile. The telltale tug would give her away even if she didn't just **know**._

 _"You're awesome, and talented, and sexy. God, I can't believe we waste time talking when you can do **that** with your mouth." And- even though she was expecting something like this - because she's caught off guard by Chloe's words, Beca lets loose a peal of laughter. She knows her grin matches the redhead's when she smothers Chloe in a hug that's giddily returned._

 _She's just beginning to sink back into her girlfriend when Jesse's voice rings out from the front of the store._

 _"BE-BE-BECAW! BECAW! OUR DEAR EMILY SEEKS YOU! COME FORTH! ALSO HI CHLOE!" She groans in frustration as Chloe's soft laughing shakes her head where she's resting it on the redhead's collarbone. Consoling hands run over her, still amped up but not going further._

 _"Boo. Poor baby didn't get off." She feels soft lips imprinting kisses on the top of her head and over to her temple. Chloe tilts her head to whisper in her ear._

 _"Don't worry, Becs. I'll make sure I thank you properly tonight. Come over after my last session?" And it's so full of false innocence that her hands fist involuntarily. She just nods, hiding the bit of a pout forming._

 _She straightens her posture, helping Chloe down. Her hands feel magnetically drawn to the redhead and they seek out hips, squeezing as Chloe tries to fix her clothing and hair. She giggles like a schoolgirl, swatting at Beca's hands shyly. It makes the brunette grin stupidly, filled to the brim with excitement and adoration. Wrapping Chloe in a hug, she leans up and kisses her jaw, whining out a small, "I love you" as she shakes the redhead._

 _Chloe turns her head down to capture her mouth, smiling as she says, "I- love- you- too," pecking Beca on the lips in between each word._

 _Beca takes Chloe's hand and leads her back into the main area of the store, hastened only by the rustling of boxes from the other side of storage._

She sighs loudly, remembering how adorable Chloe was as they said goodbye at the redhead's car, with a cute, little plaintive, " _I miss you already._ " Emily pauses at the sound, turning to look at Beca.

"Did you not like that idea? Was it, like, super weird and not good?" Beca jerks, finally coming back into the situation. She shakes her head.

"No uh, sorry. I was thinking about something else. It's a good idea. I think we should keep the song clean and focus on the vocals." The look that Cynthia Rose is giving her makes the entire half of her body closest to her itch. She briefly flashes back to earlier, when she heard CR's voice float down the hallway outside of storage, singing casually.

"Will the song be cleaner than my storage room, Beca?" And it's a toss-up over who makes a stranger noise, between Beca's sputtered choking and Cynthia's wild snort. Awkwardly shrugging her shoulders, she avoids making eye contact.

"The storage room has always been dusty, so, for sure."

"You and Chloe didn't seem to have a problem with it." Emily sits up.

"Why were you showing her the storage room?" Beca coughs loudly over Cynthia Rose's laughter.

"I was showing her the inventory and stuff." And the laughter just builds.

"Oh, you were showing her **something** , alright. Just make sure you don't make a mess." With an eye roll, they go back to work.

Beca's got her laptop out on a stool next to her, explaining how she plans to construct the song. She points out the line of vocals, running through her intentions. They toss thoughts back and forth. One of the perks of working at a music store is that there's a plethora of musical equipment.

As they work on the song, she ponders how weird it is that they're deferring to her. Everyone gives their input but in the end, they seem to gravitate towards whatever she thinks is the best. It's a little befuddling, honestly.

In the middle of her musing, Jesse ambles over with a bit of a cowboy swagger, hands in his front pockets. He's even got the rebel smirk that's normally on her own face.

"Let's go out tonight, guys. We haven't been to Ashley's in a while." Emily pouts.

"I'm not old enough to drink." Beca chuckles.

"We can get you a juice box, Bambi. With a bendy straw and everything." Everybody titters, and Cynthia Rose pats Emily's back comfortingly. Beca starts packing up. It's still relatively light out, but with November starting to settle in, the sun is departing faster and faster these days.

"So, meet at 7? Food and then reconvene?" She stands up and claps her hands like she's closing a staff meeting instead of settling plans. In the ambient mix of background music and people talking, Beca thinks about Chloe. She sends a quick text before heading off to get a bite with Jesse.

"You inviting Chloe?" She nods.

"Yeah, just letting her know where we'll be if she wants to join." Beca doesn't mention that the invitation extends to Aubrey as well. Jesse shrugs his jacket on as they head out.

"Are you planning on drinking tonight?" Beca shakes her head.

"Not too much. I don't really feel like getting drunk or anything."

* * *

This _so_ wasn't the plan. She's drunk. She's really, **really** drunk.

And she's drunk inside a bathroom stall. **With Chloe**.

She's sure she'll be embarrassed about this later, when she's sober. When she's not being smothered in an alcohol and lust-induced haze. She's sure that she'll think this wasn't such a great idea. When she's not being pinned against the side of this tiny metal box in the bathroom of her friend's bar with her girlfriend going to town on her neck and between her legs.

"Oh my God." Her head slams back against the wall as Chloe's thrusts hit **just** right. The redhead's drunken chuckles slide into her ear, followed by a warm breath and a hot tongue.

As she's praying to different deities - all of them, just in case - she fuzzily hears the bathroom door open. The voices sound familiar. Chloe, ever the adventerous lover, simply ignores the added head count and continues her ministrations. There are two distinct voices.

"So, you seem to really like her." There's a giggle.

"I do. Ash is amazing. She's so kind and like, really crazy, too." Another laugh, from the first voice. Wait, doesn't she have a friend with that nickname?

"I'm happy for you, Jessica." _**Wait.**_ Doesn't **Chloe** have a friend named Jessica?

"Thanks, Aubrey! We have to find you someone, too. Though, a little birdy tells me you've got someone on your mind already?" **_WAIT_.** Doesn't Chloe **also** know an Aubrey? How many Aubrey's could there possibly be? This time, when Beca calls to a deity, it's with a bit of panic. "Oh God."

The voices outside pause. She feels herself starting to sweat nervously, adding to everything else that's on her. Like Chloe's lipstick.

"Doesn't that sound like...?"

And Chloe, her dear, lovely Chloe, chooses, in the lull of speaking, to drop to her knees and show Beca just how **grateful** she is for the brunette's loving from this afternoon.

With absolutely no warning and no warm-up, her tongue is buried deep and Beca is completely defenseless against the moan. Her hands scramble uselessly against the walls of the stall, and she finds space in her mind to be thankful that she decided not to change out of her Chucks as she just barely keeps from slipping. Her reaction seems to be exactly what Chloe's looking for, because she **giggles**.

Beca's biting her lip so hard that she's sure she's going to bite through it. This is like a leveled-up version of earlier events, with higher stakes because if Aubrey catches them, Beca's probably going to be stabbed if she doesn't do something right. It seems like something that would happen. She's already been given 'the talk' from the blonde, after all. She tries to pull Chloe up, to stop her until her friends are at least out of the bathroom, but apparently yanking on her hair below her loose bun only fuels the fire.

Chloe moans loudly, reaching around to grab a handful of her backside. Beca squeaks. Someone's washing their hands, and Aubrey clears her throat.

"You know, I'd recognize my best friend's voice anywhere, right? Even if she were, say, to be vocalizing in a manner that doesn't necessarily consist of words?" And Beca isn't sure who she's talking to, but she's really turned on and absolutely terrified and horribly confused. Jessica laughs like everyone's at a picnic and Aubrey just told a joke. She tries to whisper to her girlfriend.

"Chlo, fuck. Chloe." Her call is subsequently ignored.

"And I would also recognize my best friend's girlfriend's voice, because that's pretty distinct, too." Beca screws her eyes shut as the redhead goes into overdrive, fucking her like they're **not** ten feet away from her best friend. As much as she attempts to stymie her release, it's inevitable and she's coming undone around Chloe, bucking and moaning. The redhead strokes along and inside her softly, drawing it out and slowly bringing her down. Even drunk in a bar restroom, Chloe's so caring. The juxtaposition is a little jarring.

"Judging from the sounds, it seems like a certain best friend was busy giving her girlfriend a good experience?" And why is Aubrey trying to have a conversation? Chloe drags her hand away from Beca's ass and smacks the stall door twice, loudly. She detaches her mouth to yell, "Oh my God, Aubrey. Get out of the bathroom already!"

Their laughter drifts off as they leave.

Beca's fairly certain there's no real visual difference between a flush of arousal and one of dire mortification, but she definitely feels one. Chloe seems to sense the disturbance, standing up to embrace her, cooing softly. She can tell that the redhead feels a little guilty.

"I'm okay. I just wish we were alone." She kisses up Chloe's neck, having to raise her feet a bit to match the redhead's height in heels. With a fast but firm peck on the lips, she smiles softly.

"I really don't know if I can look them in the eye, though." Chloe's bubbly laughter widens her grin.

"I guess you know how I felt when we got frisky in my car now." Beca scoffs.

"Not even **close** to the same thing, dude. My friends weren't in the same **room**."

They continue their petty argument as they rejoin the group of friends at the booths. Friends Beca tries to pretend aren't there. Aubrey's got a smirk a mile wide though, and it's like there's blood in the water with how much she reminds Beca of a shark in that moment. She sits back in her seat, eyeing the brunette.

"So. Beca. It seems there are some things I didn't know about you." Beca looks up at the dark ceiling, wishing that something would come crashing through it and distract everyone.

"Want to tell us about how sturdy you think the bathroom stalls are?" And there's a chorus of guffaws, bookended by snorts from Fat Amy. Chloe rubs her thigh underneath the table, but she's looking plenty satisfied, if not just a hair predatory.

"They're great, Aubrey. Everything is great." She's getting ready to launch into some teasing about her and Jesse, who is staring at the blonde with a faraway smile, but her torture seems to be unending tonight. Stacie leans forward, almost lunging.

"Short Stack. Becs. Beca. Come on." Beca just takes a deep breath, knowing that there's going to be something ridiculous at the end of this. "On a scale of one to ten, ten being mind-blowing orgasms and ruined panties, rate Chloe's sexual prowess."

There's more laughter, some whistles, and an insufferable smirk from one girlfriend with superb bedroom skills - that extend outside of said bedroom. Beca sips her fruity cocktail, much more sober after having the rush of the bathroom run-in burn through some of it. She's still loose enough to make some flirtatious quips, though. Plus, she can't let Aubrey have this. She'll be embarrassed privately, but for now, she's going to sack up and play it cool.

"I think Aubrey can tell you how highly I'd rate Chloe." The blonde blushes, a vibrant red that tinges even her ears. Beca smirks, finally feeling level again now that she's not the only one being thrown off-balance. She comments around the lip of her glass, "Though, if you couldn't tell from just looking at her, my girlfriend is pretty fucking amazing in bed."

She can tell how pleased Chloe is with her statement. Her eyes are brighter than bright, and she's pink in the cheeks. Everyone is cheering and toasting, celebrating like some team just won a game. The jubilance spreads to nearby tables, and strangers start cheering, too.

In the din, all the sound seems to fade the longer she stares at Chloe.

Her hair is up in a low bun, fiery tendrils curling down here and there, framing her face. She's toying with the straw of her drink, laughing at something Flo is saying as she places more drinks on the table. The dress that she wore tonight makes her eyes pop, a sparkly blue number with a modest choker neckline that cuts high but has a low back. The way the light glints off of her bare shoulders makes her want to kiss them. When Amy makes an outlandish joke about crocodiles and underwear, Chloe's whole body shakes in the uproar of her merriment.

Beca skates her hand across the flowy skirt of the redhead's dress, catching her hand and lacing their fingers. When Chloe looks her way, she leans in and kisses the redhead softly. It's happily returned, and the normally boisterous Chloe is quiet in reverent observation. She seems as content as Beca feels. The brunette turns away to watch the others.

Flo is being propositioned by yet another dashing bargoer as they laugh. She's long since stopped accepting shots from the patrons due to her popularity.

Stacie is toasting with Cynthia Rose as they heckle Flo from the booth, throwing out flirtatious line after line. A curvy brunette approaches, winking at Cynthia Rose and sliding a piece of paper over. Stacie whistles when CR pockets it.

Benji and Emily seem to only see each other as they both drink apple juice. Beca thinks it's really cute that he elected to stay away from alcohol for her.

Lilly is sitting at a different table, beatboxing with a group of guys Beca hasn't seen before. Fat Amy cheers them on from next to Chloe, deciding to get up when a loud man challenges her to a drinking contest.

Ashley is leaning against the booth, running idle fingers through Jessica's hair as they talk. Her eyes occasionally scan the bar but always return to the woman in front of her.

When she brings her gaze over to Jesse and Aubrey, she notices that they've drifted closer, sitting at a separate small table. He's waving his hands around, fingers of one hand curled around his beer. Probably telling another dumb joke that Aubrey inexplicably finds funny.

Looking at all of their friends, Beca's hit with this burst of warmth. She feels her eyes start to prickle, tingling with emotions she pretends not to have when it comes to people who aren't Chloe. She rests her temple against the redhead's shoulder, finally planting that kiss that she was thinking about on it.

* * *

As the night ends, Beca's standing outside with some of the group.

The bar hasn't closed yet, but it's late enough that people have started leaving. Benji's next to Emily, pulling thornless roses out of his hair and giving them to her until she has a dozen. Jesse and Aubrey are still inside, and Beca's decided to leave them alone all night, knowing that her teasing would put some serious dents in the timeline. Lilly is off to the side, with a couple of the beatboxing guys, impressing them with her ability to pick up the skill. The brunette turns around as Chloe's finishing with calling a cab.

So many things about this moment feel so familiar. She hasn't been forced to sing anything, but she _has_ spent a large portion of the night with a beautiful woman. The déjàvu just wouldn't be complete if she didn't sing to Chloe as they awaited the cab. She pulls the redhead to her. Chloe smiles.

"What's up, Becs?" She starts singing something she's been writing during her free time at work.

" _I met you in the dark, you lit me up. You made me feel as though I was enough._ " Chloe bites her lip as her eyes twinkle knowingly.

" _We danced the night away, we drank too much._ " A wink from the redhead. " _I held your hair back when you were throwing up._ " A laugh, because that happened once when Chloe was sick and it was Beca's turn to take care of her. The memory of heroically fighting her own nausea makes her smile.

" _Then you smiled over your shoulder. For a minute, I was stone-cold sober. I pulled you closer to my chest._ " She brings her arms around Chloe, hugging her loosely as the redhead traces her collarbone. " _And you asked me to stay over. I said, I already told ya, I think that you should get some rest._ " She tip-toes to kiss Chloe briefly. The redhead wrinkles her nose to vainly fight her grin.

" _I knew I loved you then, but you'd never know. 'Cause I played it cool when I was scared of letting go._ " A tear slips free from where it swam around icy blue eyes. " _I know I needed you, but I never showed. But I wanna stay with you until we're gray and old._ " Chloe chuckles wetly as more tears escape. Around them, the others have gone quiet. Beca hugs her tighter as she sings quietly, " _Just say you won't let go._ "

Chloe husks out another laugh, full of tears as she sniffs once. She shakes her head and wipes her eyes. Beca tracks red strands as they flow with the movement. A delicate hand pinching her chin brings her attention back.

"This is almost just like the first night we met, Becs." She winks at Chloe, and that elicits a small, fascinated giggle.

"How do you keep doing that?" Beca raises her eyebrows in question. She mumbles out a, "Do what?" The redhead draws her in by her hold for a quick kiss.

"Make me love you more." And Beca's heart zings. It flies around, lifted by the storm of butterflies, set on fire from the heat generated by the beating of a hundred thousand fluttering wings inside of her. She feels choked up, but instead of crying like she wants to, she squints her eyes and shrugs. In contrast to her unaffected reaction, her words are bursting with the emotion roaring inside of her like a whirlwind.

"I love you so much. Sometimes I feel like I don't tell you enough. So, like, I've kind of been writing a song, because you're turning me into this disgustingly cheesy, lovestruck... zombie," she barks out the last word, struggling to find a description that's apt, "And I think that I can still make it badass even though it's corny because really, writing music makes musicians hotter, if-mmph." Chloe cuts off her emotional rambling with a passionate kiss that has all of the energy of a healthy thunderstorm. It rolls around inside of her, shaking and trembling and tumultuous. It's like lightning, white-hot and immediate, shooting through her. She grasps at Chloe, palming up her back, reveling in the smooth skin she finds. They break away at the sound of clapping nearby.

Emily's bouncing up and down, incredibly excited for her friends. As the cab pulls up, she moves to leave with Benji, a cheery little, "Congrats, guys!" making its way over to them as they wave. Chloe giggles, turning to open the door of the car. She leans down to rest her head on it between her hands. The redhead watches as Beca twists to look at her from the other side, placing her palms on either side of Chloe's. She brings their fingers together, drawing both hands to her lips to pepper kisses along Beca's knuckles.

From behind their joined hands, with eyes so dazzling that the brunette actually has to blink more than once, Chloe murmurs, "Come home with me this time, Beca."

And as she slides into the cab next to the redhead, Beca can't help but think that maybe moments like this were meant to be, because everything about Chloe feels like destiny.

* * *

 **AN: Kim, you're still the tits.**

 **Song: James Arthur - Say You Won't Let Go**


	8. 10 Months

"Chloe, that makes no sense. We don't need to dress up," Beca says as she shuts the silverware drawer in Chloe's and Aubrey's apartment. Chloe straightens from where she was bent over, closing the oven and taking her oven mitts off. They were the set that Beca and Jesse got for the girls, raccoons for her and koalas for Aubrey. Chloe had cooed enthusiastically before making a remark about having her hands in Beca earlier. She had merely squinted her 'raccoon eyes' at the redhead as Aubrey blushed from head to toe.

"Beca. Where is your holiday spirit?" Beca grunts.

"It's **Thanksgiving** , Chloe. Who dresses up for this? I already did Halloween," she whined as she went into the living room.

Aside from herself and Chloe, Aubrey, Jesse, Flo, Jessica, Ashley, and Stacie would be here. Cynthia Rose, Emily, and Benji all went back to their respective parents' places. Fat Amy was spending the holiday with the obnoxious man from the bar, and Lilly mentioned something about special weapons testing that Beca decided it might be safer to stop listening to. She could hear a lid being placed back onto a pot in the kitchen.

"And wasn't Halloween fun?" Beca smirks at Chloe's question.

"Well, yeah, but not because we got dressed up." She can sense the redhead's responding smile in the other room.

"Mmm. You **did** look good in that spandex, Becs." Beca laughs.

"I think you pulled off the 'Lois Lane' look pretty well. Though that could just be because the glasses were a fantasy come true, so..." She pops her lips at the end, drifting off to the sound of Chloe's giggles.

"Are you gonna save me again, Supergirl?" Beca mutters about showy frat boys needing to keep their hands to themselves.

The redhead comes around the corner, apron still on. She pulls Beca into a hug by the waist, placing a brief kiss on her nose. Beca puffs her cheeks up like a hamster and crosses her eyes, blowing a raspberry at the tinkling laughter. She closes the gap between their lips as the doorbell rings, announcing guests.

"Yeah. I'll save you, every single time." Chloe squeezes her hips as she tilts her head down for another kiss, this one deeper than the last.

"You're the best. I love you," she husks out as she goes to get the door. Patting Beca on the backside, she asks, "Would you go check the food?"

As Beca stirs the various pots, she hears the squealing of several women from the entrance. Rolling her eyes, she covers the gravy and turns the heat down to a low simmer. Once she's a safe distance from the heat, she's engulfed in a hug and surrounded by the giggles of someone that isn't Chloe. "Hey!"

Stacie picks her up, shaking her from side to side in the embrace. "Hay is for horses!", she belts. Beca struggles.

"Put me down, you Amazonian woman!" There's more laughter. Beca looks up to see the others.

Jessica, Ashley, and Flo are congregated on the far side of the kitchen island. Aubrey is by the doorway hanging her coat up. That only left Jesse to complete their group for the night. Chloe makes her way over after giving her roommate a hug. She sucks her teeth, slowly approaching.

"Tsk. Don't break my girlfriend, Stacie. I need her for later." Their tall friend grins.

"Oh yeah? Like you needed her on Halloween? We didn't even see you guys for the rest of the night." Everyone trades sly looks, perfectly aware that Beca and Chloe snuck off halfway through the Halloween bash at the bar. The redhead shrugs.

"Probably, but I also just like her pretty face. She's fun to look at." Beca squeaks in indignation, wiggling when Stacie's arms get tighter. She huffs.

"Will you please stop manhandling me?!" The leggy brunette spins in a circle, ignoring the scream.

"Nope. Sorry, Becs. Haven't had my Short Stack in a while." In the middle of her struggling, Chloe comes up to them and dances her fingers up the backs of her jean-clad thighs. She pinches once before stealing a kiss, much to the group's amusement and Beca's consternation. Thankfully, Jesse's arrival shifts the attention, and she's released.

"Thank God. Jesse, you're here." Beca huffs. He grins as he removes his bomber jacket.

"Didja miss me?" She rolls her eyes, but smiles.

"Only if you don't smother me, dude."

"I would, but I'm starving." He's talking to Beca, but his eyes keep darting in Aubrey's direction.

Ever since the day she and Chloe ditched them at lunch, Jesse and Aubrey have been spending more and more time together, under flimsy excuses. She meets her girlfriend's gaze now, sharing a wink as they watch the two greet each other shyly. The sound of Flo opening a bottle of wine keeps any teasing from happening. Stacie starts lining up wine glasses as it breathes.

"Thank you, Florencia. You're a life saver." Flo nods at Stacie.

"This is from my parents. They wish us a good Thanksgiving feast," she says as she pours out the wine. Aubrey returns from her bedroom, dressed in more comfortable clothing. She picks up some glasses and hands them to the others before snagging one for herself. The blonde takes a sip, sighing contentedly.

"Wow. This is really good, Flo. Please thank your parents for us." Everyone murmurs their agreement. Chloe grabs Jessica and drags her over to the stove.

"Food is ready, so help me set this stuff on the island. There's not enough room on our table to put it all there." The blonde chuckles and digs out some serving spoons.

"I'm ready for some pie!" Beca snorts at Jesse.

"Dude, you're fat enough." She hears Aubrey quietly tell him that she thinks he looks great. She has to bite her cheek to keep her smirk in check.

* * *

Beca groans from her spot on the floor. She was stretched out with her head resting in Chloe's lap as the redhead reclined against the front of the couch. Her eyes fluttered closed at the feeling of gentle fingers gliding through her hair, lightly scratching at her scalp. She ate way too much.

Everyone was spread out in the living room talking quietly amongst themselves. Jessica and Ashley had the couch behind them, Flo and Stacie were sitting at the bay window, sipping more wine. Jesse and Aubrey were sitting in individual armchairs, pulled closer so they were tilted towards each other. There was a gas fireplace, but it wasn't cold enough to really need it yet. The atmosphere was very mellow. At Ashley's quiet giggle from the side of the couch opposite her head, Beca looks up at her.

The brunette has Jessica's hand in her lap, toying with her fingers. In a room full of people, they seem to only see each other. Jessica pulls her in for a quick kiss by their joined hands and they giggle again. The whole scene is painfully adorable and domestic, and it makes Beca want to coo like she's been presented with a bowl of wide-eyed kittens. When Ashley notices, she sticks her tongue out.

"Don't be a creep, Beca," she laughs, which garners an eye roll in return. Beca sniffs, rubbing her knuckle over her nose.

"Excuse me for being happy for you, dude. You just looked so cute and junk that it was making me a little nauseous. So this face is actually because I'm trying not to vomit," she jokes. The blonde smiles and leans into Ashley. Talking to the room, Jessica says, "I'm glad that we all met. Everybody murmurs their agreement.

Stacie holds up her wine glass, prompting everyone to retrieve theirs. She makes a toast. "To love and friendship. You girls have made everything better. I'm thankful that you all are part of the group."

Beca stares up at Chloe, entranced at the sight as Chloe takes a sip of her wine.

The redhead has her hair pulled back from her face in a clip, secured for dinner and never let go. In the dim lighting, Chloe looks like she's glowing, a rich and warm golden aura. It's a sunrise and sunset at the same time, two different qualities of light, both breathtaking. The scented candle has the air smelling sweet, like apple pie. Beca thinks that the cinnamon works well with Chloe's... everything. Twisting her face into the redhead's abdomen, she takes a deep breath, nuzzling into it.

Yeah, their group is missing some people, but all in all, it's a good day and Beca's truly thankful for everyone in her life. She looks up into electric blue eyes, taking a second to thank whoever or whatever is floating about in the ether and making the rules for having Chloe in her life.

* * *

It's a slower day at The Music Emporium, and technically she's not working today but she gets so bored at home that she inevitably ends up gravitating to where her friends are. Only Jesse and Emily are on the clock, Cynthia Rose having opted to spend the day with Flo. Beca stands at the counter, stacking piles of mini-post-its in a spiraling rainbow tower. At the last set of post-its, the leaning tower leans too much and collapses.

"Damn."

"Hello, I'm here to see a Rebeca Mitchell?" She looks up.

A dark-skinned man in a suit stands in front of her on the other side of the counter, sunglasses nestled in his hair. Beca surreptitiously swipes the pile of stationery to the floor and straightens up.

"That would be me. And 'Beca' is fine. What can I help you with?"

"My name is Allen Jones. I'm a representative with New Sound Records. It's recently come to our attention that a song of yours has been playing on the local radio station. My boss is interested in discussing some matters with you, if you'd like to come in."

Her eyes are kinda wide, she can feel it. Blinking a couple times and seeing that this is indeed an actual moment, she coughs and shakes herself out.

"Um! Yeah! I produced it with my friend Emily. She's the vocals and co-writer. She's here now." Beca calls out, perhaps a little shrilly but she's trying not to make her freakout too obvious and it's gotta leak somewhere. Because **wow**. Is this really real? Emily lopes over, all long legs and innocent enthusiasm.

"Hey Becs! What's up?" She turns to look at the man next to her. "Hello! Welcome to The Music Emporium!" She shakes his hand, oblivious to his quietly amused expression.

"So, Em, this is Mr. Jones. He's with a **record label** and he's here to ask about **our song**." Beca makes a mental note to thank Jesse for passing the song on to Luke.

Emily's eyes go as wide as hers did and she does a strange little full-body jiggle as she slowly squeaks. The whole act progresses in intensity until she's squealing and spazzing. "Oh em gee! Wow! Like, wow!" Mr. Jones laughs.

"You can call me AJ. I'm guessing you want to meet with the execs?" Beca nods.

"Definitely." He pulls out a card and places it on the counter.

"How does next week on Monday sound? 1 o'clock?", he asks as he types something into his phone.

"Perfect. That sounds perfect. We can do that." He smiles at them.

"Great. My number is on the card, as well as the address. And between us," he leans in, grinning conspiratorially, "they're really excited about you guys."

Emily makes a sound like air being slowly let out of a balloon, whistling it out around a nearly frozen smile, bouncing up and down. Beca has no idea what her own face is like. It feels numb.

"Well, I look forward to seeing you both there next week. If you have any questions, please give me a call." With that, he leaves.

"Ooohhhhh my god. Ooohhh wow. Dude. **Dude**. DUDE!" Beca blows out a breath, gripping the counter, before she races around to the other side and grabs Emily's hands. They both start jumping and screaming.

"I know! I know, I know! This is so awesome!" In the middle of their little dance, Jesse comes over.

"What's this celebration?" They both shriek at him in between laughter. Infected by their good mood, he starts laughing too. Beca remembers that it was his idea to take 'Flashlight' to Luke in the first place, and so she decides to tackle him as well.

"Oof! Haha Becs! I like hugs, but what's going on?" It comes out in a really high and decidedly beyond-girly pitch, but, "Oh my gosh thank you for taking the song dude! A record label wants to talk about it!" And maybe she didn't breathe in the delivery of the message, but Jesse seems to understand because he's squealing and jumping with them.

"Beca! Emily! You guys! We have to tell everyone!" And he's off like a shot, shouting through the store as he goes to get his phone from the back office where it was charging. She can hear him screeching into the phone, and she's overcome with elated laughter, trying to see the words on her phone. It rings a couple of times before the one voice she wants to hear picks up.

" _Hey baby, what's up?_ " Beca looses a string of giggles.

"Guess what?" She can hear Chloe's amusement over the line.

" _Something good, going from your totes adorable little giggle sesh there, Becs_." She can't even find it in herself to be annoyed.

"Yeah. Really good. So, remember that song that I was messing around with, the one that Emily wrote?" Chloe hums affirmatively.

"So! Jesse took it to that local radio station, the one with the guy whose abs are on point even though he eats like a teenager," and here Chloe makes a comment about Beca also eating that way, but it's ignored, "and like, he's been playing it, and GUESS WHAT? A record label heard it! **They heard it and they liked it and they want to meet us next week, Chlo**!" They both start screaming and it's a bit hilarious how they're harmonizing right now.

" _Beca! Honey, I'm so proud of you! Congratulations!_ " She wishes that Chloe was here right now, because she wants to hug the redhead. With a start, she realizes that she isn't actually working today. However, she doesn't want to leave Emily. They have some more yelling to do together.

"How many more tutoring sessions do you have?"

" _Two more, so I should be done by the time you close up. Why?_ " Beca pouts at the answer.

"Because I wanted to hug you. But it's okay, I think we're going to go out later. Come join us."

" _Of course! I'll be there as soon as I'm done! I wouldn't miss celebrating with you._ " She knows her smile is reaching stupid heights, but she's high on life.

"I love you, Chlo."

" _I love you too, Beca._ "

* * *

"I'm the king of the world!" Beca laughs at Emily's rambunctious proclamation and the ensuing whoops from the other patrons in the bar. Beside her, Chloe's all sunshine at dusk, radiating joy as she sips from her drink in the darkened bar.

The table had all been treated to a round of margaritas earlier, courtesy of Ashley. The brunette had joined them for a bit, congratulating the duo before going off to manage some things. Beca leans against Chloe, burying her nose in titian curls and inhaling her perfume. Across from her, with an arm around Jessica, Fat Amy boisterously starts to sing.

" _The winner takes all. It's the thrill of one more kill,_ eh Beca?" Jesse pops in, growling into his fist like an imaginary microphone.

" _The last one to fall, will never sacrifice their will!_ " The group picks up various parts of the song, Stacie doing a fantastic vocal imitation of an electric guitar and Jessica adding a harmonizing falsetto to the lyrics. Lilly starts beatboxing, surprising everyone with her mastery of the skill as Benji very enthusiastically starts impersonating a drum. Jesse's getting a little wild with his singing, directing his attention towards Beca and Emily, and occasionally Aubrey, who seems to never stop blushing nowadays around him.

A bit later, Ashley joins them again, and they all get caught up in another bout of buzzed antics. Flo lets out a hoot and a whistle as her boss channels Rosario Dawson and belts 'Out Tonight' from _RENT_ as she twirls around Jessica. Chloe and the blonde are in hysterics, trying to put dollar bills in Ashley's shirt and pockets. When Stacie gets up to join in the dancing, the catcalls increase and Beca has to lean on the table, she's laughing so hard.

* * *

"How much do you want to bet that Jesse is at your place right now with Aubrey?", Beca asks as she brushes fiery strands back from a pale face.

They're cuddled up in Beca's bed, all scrubbed and fresh. She's not drunk, but pleasantly tipsy. Relaxed. Chloe shrugs a shoulder, covered in a baggy, faded t-shirt. It slips down, pooling against the sheets and providing Beca with a splendid view of the smooth skin of her neck and shoulder. Chloe's collarbone stands out starkly, drawing her attention every now and then. Even in the dark, with only a sliver of moonlight, her glacial blue eyes are striking; they steal the breath from Beca's lungs. She subtly tries to calm herself as Chloe's fingers trace down the bridge of her nose.

"I don't want to bet at all, because he's definitely there. Brey has been much happier than normal." And, God, she's such an ass, but her snort escapes before she can properly stifle it. Chloe rolls her eyes in a manner that reminds her so much of herself that she ends up smiling.

She doesn't even really dislike Aubrey (barring the **bonding** experience, with the exercise that showed her how out of shape she was), but sometimes she can't help but poke fun at her. She likes how happy the blonde and Jesse make each other, though.

Scooting in closer, she threads her legs with Chloe's, running her calf up and down all of the skin not covered by what the redhead endearingly calls 'shorts.' More like, 'short of being nothing,' but Beca isn't complaining. As Chloe reaches down to pull her leg up higher, hooking it around her hip, Beca sighs out, "Yeah, on second thought, I don't want to discuss it anymore. I don't want to think about Jesse and Aubrey doing..." She trails off as she wrinkles her nose in distaste.

Chloe hums, skating her nose up the side of her neck, biting lightly on her ear. With a soft giggle like a breeze flowing over wind chimes, she asks, "What **do** you want to think about, baby doll?"

And **dammit** , Chloe makes her feel like **such** a girl. She ducks down and buries her face into the baggy shirt in front of her, grabbing handfuls and wrapping it around her face to hide the blush she can feel blooming. Chloe wraps her arms around her, hugging her tight and kissing her hair. She grumbles, but doesn't surface.

"Gosh Beca. You're just... the cutest. Did you know that?", she says breathlessly. She guides Beca's face to hers, pressing small kisses on her face, along her jaw and her nose, peppering her cheeks before connecting their lips. Beca isn't sure whose sigh that was, but she's definitely the one that whimpers when her gasp cracks at the end. Her fists, which had been using the redhead's shirt to hide herself, now yank that same fabric to bring her lover closer.

"I'm nowhere near as cute as you. **You're** so freaking cute it's ridiculous." She's caught up in a slideshow of moments where she's pretty sure her heart had stopped because of some adorable thing Chloe has done. Chloe swaddled in Beca's hoodie, cinnamon curls pouring out and framing her face as she sleepily rubs her eyes. Chloe in the bath, surrounded by mountains of bubbles because she was too heavy-handed with the liquid. Her lascivious wink as she invited Beca in with a massive pink beard of strawberry-scented bubbles. The dumb rap the redhead made up in a creative attempt to get her to eat something that had a weird name and the consoling song afterwards when it made her gassy. Her cheeks hurt from smiling. She isn't sure when it happened.

"Can you believe you used to call me gross?", Chloe muses, smirking at how blatantly not-gross Beca finds her. Beca laughs.

"You're still kinda gross. You're a freak, Beale. I mean, how can you eat so much g-" Chloe's sharp retort cuts her off.

"Do **not** say that I eat grass again, **Beca**." She sucks her lips in, because the last time she had made that comment, her playful mooing had started a storm of huffing and pouting.

"You're... so beautiful it's gross..ly unfair, and I was going to ask about how you could... eat so much... g-good stuff." She nods to herself, winking when Chloe gives her a look so dry that Beca starts imagining desert plants.

"Right. Okay, Mitchell. That wasn't even a good save, but I'll let it pass because I love you and when you love someone, you accept their worst moments." It's really snarky, but it still makes her grin. She pokes Chloe's cheek, shrieking and jerking away when the redhead dives to bite her finger. She doesn't get far, still trapped by one of Chloe's arms. Chloe uses that advantage to catch the offending digit between her teeth, flicking her tongue over the tip. Beca shuts her eyes, her breath hitching loudly. The redhead darts down and bites her lip, chasing her when she leans back.

"You're wildly dangerous," she mutters as her eyes flutter open.

"Do you think you can tame me?", Chloe purrs, running a nail down the middle of Beca's lips, hooking and pulling the bottom one before going in for a rough kiss.

As she rolls on top of Chloe, the redhead's hands sliding along her body possessively, Beca's glad Jesse had made up some terrible excuse in order to stay with Aubrey.

* * *

She wouldn't say she's nervous, sitting here with Emily outside of a conference room at New Sound Records. Sure, her leg is doing this really jittery thing and sure, she's rubbing her nose. But she wouldn't say she's nervous. Or anxious. Or worried. Just really excited, tinged with some sort of emotion that makes her feel like her heart might fall out of her butt if this goes south. She looks at the ball of energy beside her.

Emily's sitting next to her on the fancy leather couch, hands tapping out a pattern so irregular that it's the on-beat, the off-beat, and maybe like, a left-behind-beat. Her eyes are so doe-like and wide that it's really no wonder everyone liked the nickname 'Bambi'. She's humming their song under her breath, a bit too quickly and it sounds like a fast-forward version. Even with all of that, she's still beaming like a taller version of Chloe.

The blonde woman sitting behind the desk puts the phone down. As soon as she looks up at them, Beca straightens her posture and taps Emily. "Mitchell and... Junk?" Emily laughs.

"Yep! That's us!" The blonde nods.

"They're ready for you guys. Please go in." She gestures at the room next to them, with walls of glass and a large conference table in the center. Inside, two men and a woman sit at the head of the table on one side. Beca subtly wipes her hands on her black slacks and stands up. Emily follows her in.

They sit opposite the two men. The woman, a statuesque brunette, stands and leans forward with her hand extended for greetings.

"Hello Ms. Mitchell, Ms. Junk. It's a pleasure to meet with you today." Beca shakes her head.

"Just 'Beca', please." Emily makes a similar statement after mentioning the jokes she often hears. It makes the others smile.

"Very well, Beca, Emily. My name is Victoria Foster, head of Talent Acquisition at New Sound. These are my colleagues, Tony Roman and David Smith." The men nod. One gives a brief wave. Victoria steeples her hands.

"I assume AJ told you guys that we're interested in your song, right?" Beca and Emily nod.

"Good. I'll cut right to the chase. We're interested in purchasing the song, and bringing you both into NSR to write music." Emily titters. Tony, an older man with salt and pepper hair, smiles. His laugh lines crinkle. Beca clears her throat.

"Could you be a little more specific?" Victoria nods.

"You'd develop songs in their entirety, from lyrics to instrumentals. I hear you're behind the development of 'Flashlight'?" She shrugs.

"Emily and I both wrote it but she had it pretty much done, and she also had a good idea of how she wanted it to sound. I just helped bring that to life." Emily nudges her.

"Don't be so modest, Becs." She turns to address the others. "She's really good. It was pretty basic before Beca got her hands on it." David sits back and his sandy hair shifts a bit with the movement.

"So you're the magic behind the music, Ms. Mit-, Beca?" Bambi's agreeing for her.

"Yeah! Totally. She's the diggity dog." Everyone laughs at the word choice. Victoria writes something on the legal pad in front of her.

"In that case, Beca, would you like to work with our producers? Shadow them, learn from them, and when you're ready, become one?" Her eyebrows shoot into her hairline.

"I- what? Y-you... seriously?" She doesn't mention that she had only learned how to use Logic Pro software less than a year ago. David grins.

"Yep!" The way he claps his hands is like a mirror image of Emily, who sits across from him. She weirdly pictures them playing patty cake. Tony slides two stacks of paperwork towards them.

"Here. Take these, read them, have your lawyer read them. Think about it, and give us your answer. The contracts are good through this month, but," he joins his hands, "the basics of the contracts are as follows: You sign with us for three years. Any music you write in that time is the property of New Sound Records." He pulls one of the stacks closer, flipping through it to certain parts, pausing as he skims.

"You will be paid on a per song basis, with royalties. Of course, you also get a contract signing bonus," **_of course_** , "and Beca, you get producer benefits, since our intention is to make you one of our in-house producers." Beca opens her mouth. Thankfully, Emily's squeal covers the embarrassing croak that comes out.

"Wow guys! That's... that's _so_ cool!" David's laugh is booming, and he leans forward to high-five the leggy brunette. Victoria smiles as Tony passes the other contract back. While everyone chatters, she looks through it. Her eyes go wide as she looks at the numbers. **Wow** indeed. She coughs a little to clear her throat. This catches Victoria's attention.

"So, uh. So, you said you're interested in buying 'Flashlight.' Do you have anyone in mind?"

"Yes, we do. A newer artist who recently signed with us. We think the song will fit her image."

As they're wrapping up to leave, Tony motions her over. Everyone else exits the room while Beca scuffs the floor with the side of her heel, waiting. "What's up?" He buttons his suit jacket.

"Beca. Let me tell ya. I've been doing this for a while. I see a lot of people, a lot of talent, a lot of promises. So I know when somethin' has real potential, and when somethin' will be gone next week." He gives her a firm look. "You have real potential, kid."

Normally, she doesn't like when people call her 'kid' or 'kiddo,' or anything of the sort. But Tony saying it feels okay. She smiles. "Thanks, Tony, that means a lot to me. I hope to be an asset here." Tony grins.

"You're gonna be hot shit. Just wait."

And a moment like this feels like something big.

* * *

The month flies by in a whirlwind, and before anyone knows it, it's Christmas time. Well. Anyone except Chloe, who's been counting down since she decorated the day after Thanksgiving, because, "aren't you just feeling the Christmas **spirit** , Beca?" Which made her roll her eyes but smile anyway as she helped the redhead vomit tinsel and baubles all over both apartments.

Aubrey had gone over both contracts and had given them passing grades, negotiating slightly higher payments and making other minor changes. Beca had nearly had a seizure, worrying that they'd rescind the offer, but they didn't even bat an eyelash.

That was a week ago, and Beca had spent the last two weeks shadowing the producer taking over the song, a quirky white guy with a diagonal red streak in his black hair whom everybody called "Buddy." She can't help but imagine a golden retriever or a lab by that same name.

They'd re-skinned the song with finer touches, turning what Buddy called 'a fine wine' into a vintage treasure. The new voice was a teenager, the recently signed Cassie. The bubbly blonde had been able to put the perfect amount of 'young love innocence' into the song, and Beca was thoroughly amazed by what 'Flashlight' had become.

The song was in the final stages and ready to be added as one of the last songs in Cassie's album, a perfectly titled, "Love In The Dark". It would be dropping soon, and everyone was excited. It seemed, though, that nobody was more excited than her girlfriend.

Chloe had been practically climbing the walls with her joy, shooting musical notes and starfire out of her mouth and eyeballs and it had set Beca's heart to bursting at the seams, swooning at the thought that her achievements made Chloe so happy. The redhead pulls a tray of sugar cookies out of the oven, transferring the red and green ornaments and trees onto a small cooling rack. It had been decided that Christmas would be spent at her and Jesse's apartment since Thanksgiving was at the other one.

"I can't wait until the song is on the radio!" Chloe brings over a couple of cookies for them. Beca snags the red ornament, insisting that the redhead would enjoy the tree much more than she ever could. Her ribbing earns her a violent retaliation in the form of tickling that almost results in the loss of cookies.

"Geez, you're pretty vicious for a tree-hugger," Beca mumbles as she nibbles on her ornament. Chloe hums nonchalantly.

"Well, maybe you should stop being such a sassy pants, missy." Beca snorts.

"'Sassy pants'? Who says that? Huh, Chlo? Who says 'sassy pants'?"

"I do." And she says it with such finality that Beca really has no idea how to follow it up. So she doesn't. Chloe smirks but just winks with her pearly whites on the edge of her cookie. Beca snuggles into the redhead.

They didn't have a gas fireplace like Chloe does, but Jesse had been "swept up by yuletide fever" and gotten a portable electric fireplace, complete with video flames. She had just given him a look, knowing that he'd done it because Aubrey had expressed a little bit of disappointment that there wouldn't be any fire for Christmas. It's on now, blowing heated air at them as they relaxed on the couch. It had finally gotten cold enough in Los Angeles to need it, and her perennial ray of summer sun was definitely feeling it. Chloe shivers, pulling Beca closer.

"I have no idea how you survived the cold, Beca. I feel like a Popsicle." Beca grins.

"Yeah? Can I lick you?" Chloe arches an eyebrow slowly before lowering her gaze to Beca's lips.

"You're definitely good at it," she murmurs. She feels her face heat up. The redhead connects their lips briefly but firmly. "You know, I was stranded in Cuba once with my family. We almost didn't make it back." Beca's eyes widen.

"What?" Chloe nods.

"Yeah, it was when I was like five years old. My dad has a friend who lives there and we went to visit him. Because of the tension between Cuba and the United States at the time, it turned into a huge international hassle. And that's the story of how I nearly never left Havana." Beca gawks.

"So, the love of my life could have stayed trapped in Cuba. We might have never met. You could have become a Cuban citizen." Chloe bites her lip around the huge smile overtaking her face. She nods and presses her lips into Beca's neck, giggling into it. When she sits back up, Beca's momentarily struck. She blinks a few times, but it only seems to make it worse.

"Your eyes are like, the brightest thing I've ever seen, dude." She's vaguely aware of how breathy it sounds, but it's hard to really focus when Chloe's looking at her like that, with eyes so luminous and brilliant that all of the other lights in the apartment suddenly seem dark in comparison. "And they're really, **really** blue. How are they so blue?" At this point, she's just thinking out loud.

"I like the color of your eyes better. They're this dark, steely blue. When you look at me, I feel all warm," she wiggles her body, squirming closer, "and I like the way you make me feel." 'I like the way you make me feel' _._ It's such a simple way of saying it.

Such a simple way of saying that Beca takes her breath away, that Beca looks at her like she's the sun, because **she is**. It's such a simple way to say that Beca dotes on her. She's fully aware of how smitten by Chloe she is. It's such a simple way of saying that Chloe loves how much Beca loves her.

As Christmas Eve draws closer to Christmas Day, Aubrey and Jesse arrive and the four spend the evening drinking hot chocolate in the living room, chatting quietly. Beca observes the other couple quietly as Chloe talks with them.

Jesse has his arm around Aubrey, who had finally given in to his goofy boyish charm. It revealed a geeky side of the blonde that delighted Beca to no end. Aubrey had just as many bad jokes and movie references as Jesse did. The blonde was possibly more of a geek. She had laughed loudly when she caught Aubrey discussing Star Trek with Benji. Even the threat of bodily harm couldn't convince her to keep it to herself.

Aubrey's leaning against him, legs tucked underneath her on the loveseat. When she laughs, she tucks her head into his chest. The sight makes Beca smile, because she's happy that Aubrey seems to like Jesse as much as he likes her. He'd gotten over his startling inability to form a sentence around her, but he still seemed to be awkward occasionally. Some of his jokes are still terrible. Beca drinks her hot chocolate, drawing a marshmallow closer before vacuuming it into her mouth.

Eventually, the cold outside mixed with the warmth inside the apartment drives everyone to bed. Beca munches on some of the cookies that Chloe had brought with them as she spins in her computer chair. Chloe comes in and drags the chair closer to the bed before sitting on the edge. The redhead takes over the spinning, first turning her one way and then the other so that she doesn't actually get dizzy.

"Today was fun." Beca agrees.

"Yeah. It was nice to spend the day with you." She can tell that Chloe's remembering their earlier shower shenanigans from the way her eyes sparkle and the little giggle that makes its way out passed her cheeky grin. With a kiss that quickly gets out of hand, they fall on the bed. Beca sighs when Chloe brings her hand up to cup her cheek and her jaw, thumb rubbing slowly under her eye. Leaning into the touch, she brushes a strand of hair away from Chloe's face. The redhead draws her in, kissing her passionately, and the depth of emotion pouring through it takes the air out of the room.

It's kind of crazy, how intense the kiss is. They've kissed dozens - maybe hundreds - of times and yet each occasion never fails to fill her with butterflies. Every touch is like lava, a liquid fire that sears her nerves. Every whispered word, every declaration of love is like lightning, frying her brain and singing through her veins.

She whimpers as Chloe controls the kiss, twisting her tongue around hers with a calm surety that only makes her heart race faster. She kisses like she has no intention of stopping anytime soon, like she's not going anywhere. Chloe kisses like she's forever.

It sure makes her feel like this thing between them is forever.

"Merry Christmas, Beca."

* * *

 **AN: Song at the bar: Sweet Victory by David Glenn Eisley**


	9. 11 Months - 1 Year

Everything had picked up speed like it had been caught in the jet stream. In the span of around two months, her life had gone from an easy pace to busy. And it didn't seem to be slowing down.

Beca's producer shadowing had opened more doors than she could have imagined. On top of a quickly forming network of connections, spinning out around her like a web, she was also learning so much. Everyone at New Sound had gawped at her like a crowd of fish when she had regurgitated everything Buddy had shown her down to a tee.

"Wow. And when did you learn this again, Rain?" Beca scrunches her nose up. The nickname had weirdly picked up way more steam than it should have. It happened randomly one day, when one of the other producers, Chelsea, had popped her head in to listen to Buddy and Beca working. After being compared to the savant in the movie _Rain Man_ , Buddy was ecstatic at the description, and thus the name was born.

"I uh. It was like, yesterday. Remember when Buddy was making the joke about the equalizer bars?" She starts gesturing with her hands, laying them horizontally side by side, one higher than the other, mimicking it. "Well, it was kinda around then. I mean, he already told me about it, but I also just like, figured out the rest." And more gawping.

It had happened this way for a lot of things, from learning music production to writing music with Emily.

Bambi had shined brightly in the lyric-writing department. The two had bonded quite a bit, forming their own dumb jokes and greetings. Emily sits on the couch in the back of the studio room doodling on a notepad as she waits for Beca.

"That's amazing. Buddy's going to need a new job soon!" The senior staff around her laugh. Beca smiles.

"I don't think that's happening. I still have so much to learn," she says amicably.

Later, as she and Emily sit in one of the break rooms in the building, Buddy approaches. He drops a folder onto the table. Beca looks up from her snack, covering her mouth as she chews.

"Rain, new assignment for you. Time for you to learn to fly on your own. Hi Bambi!" Buddy holds his hand out for a low-five and Emily happily smacks it, mouth full of fruit salad. Beca opens the folder, to find details about an artist and a brief sentence about what type of song they wanted.

"So, you want me to write out a song, or what?" He shakes his head.

"Do the whole thing, from top to bottom. I'll check in with you, but everyone wants to see how you do without me." Her eyes expand.

"What? But, but I'm still so new to this!" He comes around to clap a hand on her back.

"Everyone has faith in you. Just gotta have faith in yourself. No help from Bambi this time, either. We're stealing her and giving her her own homework."

Beca frowns, because usually everyone had a team to fully develop a song. Whether it was just one other person or several, there was always **someone**. So this kind of test feels a bit unfair, not to mention rushed. However, she doesn't protest, acknowledging this opportunity for what it is. As Buddy leaves, Emily scoots closer to read the file.

"I wonder if the rumors are true." Beca raises her eyebrows in question. Emily drinks her water before continuing.

"I hear that they're going to make you a full producer soon. Maybe this is the big test before you graduate. Which is totally awesome. Like, really awesome. But also scary." 'Also scary' was right. She didn't think that she'd even been here long enough to wear down the carpet anywhere.

* * *

She and Emily no longer officially worked at The Music Emporium, but they hung out here often, and would help if they were free. Cynthia Rose had hired the brunette that had approached her at the bar, Denise, as well as Donald, one of the beatboxers. Beca sits in the playing alcove now as she stares intensely at her notebook. Her dark muttering draws Emily and Denise over.

"What's up, Buttercup?" Beca looks up at them with the same expression she'd been sporting for the last hour and they recoil.

"Or more like... Thunderstorm, because that's a scary look, Becs." Bambi flops down across her lap and Denise pulls a stool up. Normally, Beca enjoys the occasional reprieve from the constant flow of customers, but right now she just feels like wallowing alone.

"Oh, nothing's up. Literally nothing. I'm just here. Not writing, not doing anything," she grits out. " **Failing** ," she tacks on at the end. Denise reaches out and pats her leg.

"CR is always bragging about how amazing you are. I'm sure it'll come to you." Emily rolls over so she's able to look up at Beca.

"Yeah! You're like, super cool, Beca. You got this." She grabs both of Beca's arms, shaking her wildly. "You GOTS this!", Emily cries in a high falsetto, purposely letting her voice crack. And against her will, Beca huffs a little laugh.

"Okay, okay! You're so weird."

They volley silly jokes and insults back and forth, teasingly drawing Denise into it briefly before she has to go back to work. The lighter mood helps her write out the rest of the song, bringing it nearly to the point of completion, but something still doesn't seem right with it.

Eventually, Emily has to go, leaving Beca to wring her hair in frustration. It's supposed to be a song about love, but it sounds like a funeral dirge and she wants to climb into a casket.

"It's supposed to be ' **in love** ', not ' **in the grave** ', damn it." She's **so close** , but she's also running out of time. There was a small meeting in two days and she was expected to present what she had in front of them. She couldn't give them the song as it was. It was a little too 'The Ghost Of You' from MCR and not enough Beyoncé's 'Crazy In Love' or 'Love On Top' and it was driving her nuts. All she can hear as she goes through the song is Gerard's voice screaming " _she dies!_ " in her mind. This was definitely not what they had envisioned for this artist. She scoffs.

Okay, so maybe the lyrics are fine and it wasn't such a drastic difference, but maybe the lyrics aren't? She growls and stuffs her things into her messenger bag, unceremoniously piling it all in.

Bidding everyone farewell, she decides to just go see Chloe. Even if she's a failure, at least her girlfriend likes her.

* * *

Beca takes a deep breath as she walks up to the meeting room. **_Thank the heavens for Chloe Beale._**

Chloe had saved the day, with her musical ability and keen intuition on all things concerning Beca. Maybe it was cheating a little, hearing the redhead's input on the song, but the key change had changed it completely. It was finally a love song worthy of singing to people actually in love. She smiles now, remembering how cute Chloe had looked, pink nails tapping her chin as she thoughtfully assessed the sheet music.

As soon as she opens the door, there's a booming voice greeting her.

"Kid! There you are!" And she's smiling, because there's only one person who really calls her that.

"Tony!" He had been like a father to her, or a really cool uncle. Having children around her age, Tony had dragged both her and Emily over to his house for dinner, where they were given the pleasure of meeting his wife, Maggie. The woman constantly nagged them about meeting their significant others. It was all very warm and comforting, even with the mother hen routine.

They share a quick hug before sitting down at the table. This was a smaller room than the glass walled one, with an oval table. Around her sat Tony, Buddy, Victoria, and Chelsea. Beca tries not to sweat any harder. This particular group of people makes it clear that the only reason they were meeting was because of her. Victoria lines up some paper in front of her, taking them into her hands and tapping the butt of the stack on the table.

"So, Beca. I hear that you're doing quite well in your shadowing." Buddy grins while she nods.

"Yeah. It's going okay, I think. I'm learning a lot." He waves his hand, batting her words away.

"Okay? **Okay**? Vicky, Rain is a diamond in the making. She's learned everything I've showed her in no time at all!" He turns to her. "What are you taking, and where can I get some?" Beca chuckles, sliding her sheet music around.

"It's just something I've always been able to do. I learn really fast, especially when it comes to music." Buddy and Chelsea incline their heads at that. Chelsea clears her throat.

"I heard that Buddy gave you a little something to work on?" Beca shifts uncomfortably, nerves coming back full force as she starts to feel a pressure behind her eyes.

"Um. Yeah, he did, last week. I have a rough version. It's like, it's- we can fix it if you guys hate it." She passes the sheet music over to Chelsea and Buddy while she pulls out her laptop where the recorded version of the song is, with Chloe's soprano on vocals. Tony gestures for her to play the track. Everyone falls silent as they listen.

Listening to Chloe's voice singing a song that Beca wrote about her brings her a bit of peace. Of course, it's tweaked for mainstream listening, but it's written in a way that everyone can relate to. There are a few parts that she thinks could use some more work, but she tries not to focus on them. When the song ends, the group exchanges loaded looks.

The longer everyone is quiet, the stronger the pressing in her head becomes. It starts to make her a little dizzy and she tries to blink through the steadily building headache. Out of the corner of her eye, she spots someone else sitting at the far end of the eight-person table. Turning her head, she sees it's Fat Amy. With a little jump, her eyes go wide. Before she can ask why Amy's here, Victoria hums pensively. She tears her gaze away.

"Beca. You got this assignment last week, right?" Beca nods haltingly.

"Last Thursday, so six days ago. That's why it's so half-baked." She doesn't add that Buddy had sentenced her to work on it alone, figuring they either already knew or she wasn't supposed to say anything, from the way he was staring at her. She can feel Amy's eyes burning into the side of her head. Chelsea coughs, taking her glasses off and perching them atop her short blonde hair. The strands brush across her chin as she settles.

"Mitchell. How have you managed to stay hidden all of these years?" Chelsea is smiling at her, but the words aren't quite processing correctly. Beca shakes her head.

"Wait. What?" This seems to prompt everyone else to move as well. Tony rubs her shoulder.

"Kid. What did I tell ya when we first met, huh? Yer hot shit."

Beca mumbles, still out of her head, "I don't really want to be any kind of shit, but if I have to, might as well be hot..." The group looks surprised. Even Beca jerks when she realizes what she just said, but the boisterous laughter seems to be a good thing. Laughing with, not at, and all that. Tony continues.

"This song is gold." Victoria agrees.

"It's even more impressive considering you haven't been here with us for very long and the short deadline we gave you." Buddy leans in, tapping the table with his index finger.

"We didn't expect you to get this far into the song. I thought you'd _maybe_ have some lyrics and a tune to put it to. But you went and got it recorded. Good job, Rain. Good job."

Beca finally lets out the breath she hadn't been aware that she was holding. Victoria sits up a bit straighter, indicating she wants to discuss more business.

"Beca. In light of your achievement with this, we'd like to formally offer you a position as junior producer." Chelsea pipes up, "You will still be working with Buddy, but now your name will be on more than the lyric credits." Buddy laughs.

"Imagine that, Rain." She's nodding but **wow** what is even going on.

They go through more specifics. Over all, it's not that big of a change from what she's already doing, but there are more responsibilities and privileges, and **money**. She didn't think she'd need more, but here they are, giving her more of it.

Tony invites her and Emily ("and y'all's honies") to dinner with Maggie later in the week. She decides to stay seated as they all leave, giving her a minute to absorb her promotion. When they're gone, she turns to Fat Amy, who has remained silent and unacknowledged by anyone so far.

"Um, Amy, what are you doing here?" The blonde doesn't say anything, merely staring at Beca. The unblinking gaze sets her nerves on edge. She scratches the back of her neck.

"Uh, hello? Amy, what, are you cramping? Is it that time of the month? Wombat got your... womb?", she tries to joke, but there's still no reaction. It's starting to feel like The Shining. Beca waves her hand between them, twirling her chair a bit so she can face Amy directly.

"Ohhkaayyy. Dude, you're kinda weirding me out." Her eyebrows furrow, noticing Amy is a little pale and her eyes dull. "Dude?" She slaps the table with the flat of her hand. When she finally gets a reaction, it's not what she was hoping for.

Amy turns to mirror their positions. Continuing her unwavering stare, she opens her mouth wide. With a force that drains the life out of Beca, Amy looses a deep and piercing howl.

It's a guttural shriek, like a tornado ripping through a steel building, a dragging of metal on metal. She's never heard a sound so deep and so high at the same time but it fills the room and her head. It's just so _loud_. Beca sits back as far as she can, having pushed her chair against the one beside her.

Amy's head lolls back, no longer watching Beca but instead staring at the ceiling as her scream continues unabated. A bizarre hazy wind pours out of her mouth, blurring the air. That headache rears its ugly head again and it pounds so heavily that she moans in pain, driving her eyes shut as much as her terror wants her to keep them open. When she feels a palm on her shoulder, she jerks so violently that she almost tips the chair over. Clutching over her heart, she sees that it's just the receptionist that she met on her first day at New Sound, Violet. She looks understandably concerned.

"You okay there?" Beca nods, eyes darting around and seeing no trace of Fat Amy or the haze.

"I... I had a headache. You didn't, um, you didn't see a blonde woman in here, did you?" Violet shakes her head.

"Besides me, no," she says. Beca wipes her hand over her face, getting up.

"Alright. I'm just tired. Seeing things and whatnot." **_Quite an understatement._** Violet hums in understanding.

"I hear that a lot, actually. People in this industry don't seem to sleep all that much. Congratulations, by the way, on your promotion." Beca smiles tightly at her as the brunette moves to leave.

"Thanks, Violet." Turning to open the door, she's still kind of freaked out by what just happened.

 ** _What the fuck was that?_**

* * *

She loves to just look at Chloe.

Watching Chloe put her earrings on in the mirror in the redhead's bedroom, Beca's heart does a funny little dance inside her chest. The sunlight is softly streaming through the window, and everything around Chloe looks like it belongs in a Disney movie with her as its resident princess. She stealthily peeks about, searching for some birds and bunnies to come pouring out of a bush or a hole in a tree, all eager to help Chloe braid her hair or sweep. Her snickering draws the redhead's attention and she glances over her shoulder in the mirror.

"What's so funny, you?" Beca leans more comfortably against the doorframe, resettling to bend her leg behind her and nudge the floor with the toe of her heeled boots.

"Nothing. Just looking at a pretty lady. Wondering where the cute little animals are." She squints out the window. "Have you tried whistling to them?" Chloe laughs softly.

"You're such a dork, Becs." She just grins in response, pretending she isn't nervous in the slightest.

They're traveling to Miami to meet the artist that will be working with her and Buddy on a new song that she'd written recently. It had started out as a little joke thing, she was singing it for fun with Emily, low-key poking fun at Chloe. Buddy had happened to overhear it and insisted on turning it into something real. The artist had flown in to record the song and the single would be playing in clubs across Miami first. And now here they are, Beca getting ready to travel across the country for its maiden voyage into the public. The redhead picks up her luggage. "Let's go!"

Aside from being the representative face for NSR, she's also meeting Chloe's parents. Chloe's **parents**. It was just her luck that they happened to live in Miami. While it was an honor, it was also terrifying. So she internally panics the entire seven hours it takes to battle LA traffic and fly into MIA. She panics into their hotel room and as she sits on the bed, eyes tracking Chloe when she goes into the bathroom complaining about needing to "pee like I'm a pregnant lady, Beca."

Thankfully, Chloe seems to sense how unstable she's feeling and puts off the introduction until after her meeting. The redhead slides behind her. She stretches out and wraps an arm around Beca's torso, the other going to prop her head up. Drawing swirls under her shirt, Chloe asks, "Who's the artist? Tell me more about what's going on."

Beca has thus far been fairly secretive about the song. She knows that the redhead would be chomping at the bit to hear it and so she's played it pretty close to her chest, only supplying the barest details.

"A girl." She feels Chloe practically rumbling with energy like a rocket about to take off. She clenches her jaw to stave off her grin. Chloe's hand stumbles in its casual pace, but continues after a second. "And?"

"And what?"

"Come on, Beca. You've been avoiding telling me anything forever!" Beca hums.

"Hmm, have I really? I don't remember doing that. Sounds totally shady and not like me at all." She jerks away with a yip when the once peaceful hand pinches her. "Hey! Cut that out!" The hand smacks her belly.

" **You** cut it out! Why won't you tell me?" Beca huffs, leaning back into the warm body behind her.

"Camila Cabello." She twitches when the redhead shrieks.

" **What**?" She shrugs.

"Yeah. She's singing the song." Chloe sits up, allowing Beca to fall back onto the bed.

" **Why didn't you tell me sooner**?!" Her eyebrows raise at Chloe's pitch.

" **Why** are you yelling?" She's pelted by some really soft hands. "Violence! Dude!"

"Beca! We're going to meet **Camila Cabello** and you didn't **tell** me?!" She rolls her eyes.

"I just told you. Literally like a minute ago." Another smack.

"I didn't pack anything nice enough!" Beca snorts loudly, grimacing at how unattractive it sounds.

"We aren't meeting like, **the Queen** , or anything. Really. I mean, just another human being. She's a bit of a dork. It isn't that big of a deal." The end of her sentence is drowned out by more shrieking as Chloe bounces off of the bed to go call Aubrey.

Watching Chloe jump around the room like an excited teenaged girl fussing over her first crush, Beca feels warm and fuzzy. Everything about Chloe is a burst of sunshine and her heart actually aches because of how overwhelmed she is by her love for the redhead. Beca pulls a pillow to her chest, tucking the top under her head as she softly smiles. As if she's drawn by Beca's thoughts, Chloe catches her eyes in the window where she's been looking out at the darkened city. Even in the reflection, Beca can see the way Chloe's eyes shine brightly. And her heart still manages to catch in her throat at the wink, as powerful as the first time.

Yeah, she really just loves to look at the person she loves.

* * *

They're supposed to be meeting with Camila later today, which Beca assumes she needs energy for. However, Chloe seems determined to make sure she's dead on her feet before then.

First, the redhead had started the day with a very meticulous perusal of her body, which was fine, because nobody says "no" to a sexually aroused Chloe Beale. It was just as fine when the redheaded vixen chased her into the shower, pushing her up against the cold tiles and making sure she heated up enough to warm the whole bathroom. She shivers, remembering how detailed Chloe was with her tongue when she dropped to her knees. But it hadn't stopped there, when she was already wobbly.

Chloe had dragged her into the restroom upon seeing Beca become intensely jealous after a Miami meathead with an admittedly perfect body tried his hand with the redhead.

 _What was the big deal? It was just a sandwich._

 _Beca couldn't understand why it was so crowded in here in this dinky, 'cozy' sandwich shop in Little Havana, surrounded by a sea of Cubans. She waited by the wall as Chloe stood in line to order. Beca crossed her arms and leaned back, just looking at Chloe while the redhead chatted with an older woman. The noise level was too high to really hear the conversation but the old lady seemed jovial. Her eyes narrow when a man walks up._

 _His dark hair is perfectly cut and styled, buzzed on the sides and luxurious on the top, with lighter tips swirling like ocean waves. It's tastefully shiny with products, cradling his probably ridiculously expensive designer sunglasses. He's got the golden olive skin and the type of body that they make molds of. His broad shoulders are prominent, his chest hugged by the tight muscle shirt that he's wearing. And he doesn't skip 'leg day'. She imagines there's a bronze statue of him somewhere. The guy is basically the archetype for Cuban models. Beca grits her teeth._

 _Epitome of male hotness or not, he had no business running his giant meat mitts up her arm like he was someone special. Her stomach roils when Chloe laughs at whatever he says. He leans in even closer so that his chest touches the redhead's arm, speaking into her ear. Chloe leans back a little and Beca briefly hates how intensely her insides pull at the sight of red curls dancing with the movement, baby blue eyes so deep that she can sink in them even from here. She's debating going over there and ripping the redhead out of the shop when her quiet turmoil is finally loud enough for Chloe to turn to her._

 _Like a precious sacrifice to the gods, whatever look is on her face must be enough to summon Aphrodite to her side because Chloe is cutting through the crowd like she's parting the sea. It's a scene straight out of a movie, where the people around her blur considerably and the focus sharpens on the redhead. The recognition of her girlfriend abruptly departing from her conversation with the man like he doesn't matter alerts her to the fact that he really **doesn't** , that Chloe loves _her _, not Mister Perfect Beach Bod. She quickly blushes in shame._

 _As the redhead approaches, she straightens and uncrosses her arms, ready to apologize and explain that she doesn't doubt her or their relationship but Chloe grabs her arm and pulls her away before she's fully expelled the first syllable of her apology. They enter the restroom._

 _With absolutely no hesitation, Chloe pushes her into the handicap stall at the end of the row, locking the door and turning to stare at her. Beca sighs._

 _"I'm sorry. I just got stupidly jealous. I know you love me. I just..," she purses her lips, "I just go a little crazy when it comes to you." She weakly laughs at her words. Chloe's still quiet. Beca takes one of her hands, playing with the redhead's fingers and fixing her gaze on them._

 _"Please don't be mad. I wasn't going to do anything," she mumbles. Chloe chuckles, and the sound draws her head up._

 _"Sweetheart. That guy could probably deadlift three of you." Beca pouts pathetically because that isn't what she wants to hear. She knows that guy is ripped._

 _Chloe ducks down, biting her pouting bottom lip and sucking on it. She plants her hands on Beca's ass, digging her nails under the bottom of her shorts. She whimpers when the redhead harshly smacks her backside, gripping it and pulling up until Beca jumps enough for Chloe to pin her to the tiled wall behind her. Her legs wrap around Chloe, head falling back as the redhead drops her mouth to the swell of her chest that's exposed by her tank top. Somehow, she finds the brain cells needed to make a comment._

 _"I guess you're not upset, huh?" Chloe straight-up growls around her predatory smirk, the top of Beca's shirt in between her teeth as she winks up at her through her lashes. This is one of those times where Beca is completely laid out, undeniably slain by the sheer sexuality that Chloe exudes._

 _"I'm the luckiest woman alive," she breathes, completely stunned by the amazing creature in front of her. Her salacious sex kitten giggles, returning to the adorable love bunny. With a shake that sends fiery curls bouncing around them, Chloe disagrees._

 _"Nope! I think I'm luckier. I've got you, after all." She squeezes, her hands full of Beca, to emphasize her point._

 _Chloe has her wicked way with her, leaving her to try and muffle her cries of passion in a bite-marked neck before they fix their clothing. She's not even bothered by the hickey that the redhead made, just barely visible at the top of her shirt._

 _As Chloe fixes her hair in the mirror, she winks at Beca again, biting her tongue for a second before turning to lace their fingers._

 _"Come on. I want my sandwich."_

Her brain had practically melted upon hearing Chloe order in Spanish, which was silly, because she was **ordering a sandwich** , but feelings be feelings, and she had been taken by the tide of her schoolgirl reactions, biting her lip and grinning like an utter fool as Chloe admitted breaking her vegetarian lifestyle only for Cuban sandwiches. It was something she grew up with and could not be negotiated.

Now, she stumbles along as the redhead shows her South Beach. The art deco style of the buildings is certainly eye-catching, but nothing holds a candle to Chloe Beale excitedly rambling on about the food, the scenery, the people and their obsession with tracksuits.

"When do you have to meet Camila again?" Beca blinks.

"About an hour from now, why?" Chloe teases her teeth over her bottom lip, bringing her shoulder up in a shy shrug.

"I was just wondering." Beca arches her eyebrow.

"Huh. Right. What do you have going on in that pretty red head of yours?" Chloe giggles when Beca pokes her temple.

"I'm just really excited for you to meet my parents." She can't help it. She grimaces and shivers. Chloe's look is not amused.

"What? I'm **nervous**. They're your parents. As in, the people whose daughter I'm defiling," she lifts both her hands up in a 'I can't help it' gesture, gradually increasing the level of panic escaping, unaware of the titters coming from her girlfriend.

"What am I supposed to say to them? 'Hi, I'm Beca, I'm doing dirty, dirty things to your precious only daughter and I hope to continue my sexual activities with her for as long as I can, let's get tea'?"

She ignores the peal of laughter from the woman beside her, "Do you know what they would do to me, Chlo? Any parent would **incinerate** me." And Chloe's eyes are too striking, too vivid.

She leans in, graceful and dangerous like a big jungle cat, red mane blowing in the sea breeze and wild from the humidity. Chloe runs her nose along her cheek, licking lightly, sampling her like the animal that Beca's currently comparing her to. A quick little bite, a scraping of teeth along the apple of her cheek, and a heated whisper barely heard above the din of sports cars and open bars.

"I love it when you do **dirty** things to me, **Beca**."

Her name isn't a swear word, but **damn** does it sound like a filthy bedroom moan, all wanton and wet. Her breath gets stuck in her throat.

"Uh... um. Wow." Chloe throws her head back and laughs loudly, one hand across her stomach and the other grasping Beca's hand tightly. She feels the kiss she receives like a blooming flower, heat traveling from the point of contact out and around, spreading her blush. She's still trying to reboot after that catastrophic meltdown, but through the wreckage, one thing remains abundantly clear:

Chloe Beale is one of a kind.


	10. 1 Year cont'd

**AN: A dear reviewer made a comment about Beca's quick success. It was positive, but I want to say some things.**

 **The reason that Beca is promoted so quickly is because she's being assessed based upon her talent, potential, and proven results. Not seniority.**

 **Our main character is hot shit and New Sound knows it.**

 **Also: Care Warning: Panic attack**

* * *

"Mom, Daddy, this is Beca."

Oh God. She's gonna be sick. Her vision swims, and for a nerve-racking minute, she's sure she's going to pass out in a puddle of vomit. The comforting stroke of fingers across the inside of her elbow and down her forearm helps, but just barely.

Nancy Beale is a vision into Chloe's future, and she's going to be gorgeous in her late 40's. Her hair is a bit lighter than Chloe's, but still pretty vibrant. Nancy's eyes, though, are green. The woman reaches out and takes Beca's limply half-raised hand, pulling her into a hug.

Beca's doing a great impression of a typical movie zombie, mummy, or maybe Bride of Frankenstein, arms up and out. It's great. **Great**. She awkwardly bends her arms at the elbow and embraces Chloe's mother like she's just been hugged mid-dance move doing 'the robot'. Only, nobody seems to mind and Chloe's beaming like she's passed on her job as the sun to Beca and the redhead's a sunflower. Nancy's saying a bunch of sweet things about how happy she is and how happy Beca makes Chloe, and all Beca can feel aside from how painfully inept she is at existing is the acutely burning stare of Michael Beale.

Standing over a foot taller than her meager 5'2", Michael cuts an imposing figure. He probably used to be really muscular back in the day. She assumes that the shade of sandy blond is similar to Chloe's brother, the yet-to-be-met Robert. Beca notices that the icy blue eyes she loves are so much more intimidating on him. As soon as Nancy releases her, she turns Beca in his direction. She tries to smile or laugh, or something, but it turns into some grimacing and that noise a door makes when you need to oil it but forget for about a hundred years.

"Heheheh. Um. Ahem." His eyebrows hike up, seemingly unimpressed. She tries again.

"H-hello, sir. I'm Beca Mitchell, Chloe's girlfriend," she's starting to sweat **so much** , "and I love her very much and it's an honor to meet you both." And for some reason beyond her comprehension, she bends at the waist in a deep bow like this is Japan and she's meeting the shogun. Which, in all honesty, deserves the same amount of caution and respect because this man was more likely to stab her than Aubrey.

"How long have you known my daughter?" A lot of answers race through her mind, some of them that will probably end with her demise, but she picks the most honest one.

"Not long enough, sir." Why is she still bowing? She smooths out her shirt to make the motion of straightening up less noticeable. It doesn't work.

Everyone's kinda just staring at her and because she's on a roll with the whole 'I feel completely out of control' thing, she starts hearing The Police's 'Every Breath You Take' in the background, " _I'll be watchin' you_ " repeating as she shifts her weight from foot to foot.

This wasn't supposed to happen. They weren't supposed to meet Chloe's parents yet. She was supposed to discuss with Camila which clubs they'd be going to for the song that she'd yet to tell Chloe about specifically. They were **supposed** to have more time for her to pretend she wasn't freaking out. They **weren't** supposed to run into Chloe's parents out here on the streets of Miami. Bring back Mr. Cuban Sandwich.

"Isn't she adorable, Mom, Daddy?" And the frigid winter she's stuck in is broken, Nancy and Chloe both aww'ing over her like she's some delivery of a box of puppies. Michael is still there all arms crossed and staring at her. Nancy places her hand on his arm, pulling it over so she can hug it.

"Oh Mikey, relax, would you?"

He finally, **finally** breaks into a grin, patting her shoulder with the force of a football player. She forgot to tell him she wasn't playing defense. The air puffs out of her lungs and she coughs, which makes him laugh.

"You, you're alright. Good answer." She just laughs nervously.

"I told you guys!" Chloe hugs her from behind, pressing a kiss onto her bare shoulder.

Though it's something they've done basically since they met, for some reason it feels wildly inappropriate right now. She jumps. "Chloe!"

Her girlfriend is unbothered. "What?"

"' **What** '? Your parents are standing right here!" Her voice is a bit shrill. Michael laughs.

"It's not something you've done before, right, Beca?" She knows how horrified she looks. The sheer terror on her face makes him double over, bracing his hands on his thighs as he cries. Nancy swats his back.

"Michael! Don't laugh at the girl! Look at her, poor thing." That only makes him laugh harder, and he stumbles away a couple of feet.

"Don't mind him, dear. He's just messing with you." Beca nods mechanically. Chloe hugs her again, kissing from her shoulder up her neck. She's unsure if the shivering is from arousal or fear. Chloe chuckles against her ear.

"Relax, baby. I'm 27. It's okay. My parents know I have sex," she drops her voice down to a sultry whisper, "but they don't know how much I like sex with you." She whimpers, and Chloe laughs. Nancy smiles at them.

"What are you doing to her, Pooh Bear?" Chloe shrugs. Beca grins at the nickname, stowing it away for later.

"Just telling her I love her!" Beca rolls her eyes. The ringing of her phone distracts them. She picks it up, not recognizing the number.

"Hello?" A man responds.

" _Hello? Is this Beca Mitchell from New Sound Records?_ " Beca chokes.

"Oh shit. Sorry, I mean yeah. How may I help you?" Chloe's parents are watching her.

" _This is Kenny, Camila's manager. I'm just calling to let you know she's on her way. Twenty minutes._ " Beca's nodding even though he can't see.

"Okay, I'll see you both at the Setai then." They both hang up. She pockets her phone.

"Um, that was work calling-" Chloe's squeal cuts her off.

"Ooooohhh was that Camila?!" Now they're watching Chloe.

"Err, no, that was her manager. She's on her way to meet." Beca lowers her voice, trying to keep the information private in case there are any inquisitive ears. Chloe catches on.

"Oops, sorry." She gives Beca a quick peck. Really, her body's reaction to the redhead is something she can't control, so the massive smile and soft giggle just... happen. Chloe boops her nose.

"Oh, that was totes adorable, babe." Beca wrinkles her nose but doesn't reply to that.

"So um, I have to go to this thing for work. Chlo, do you want to hang out with your parents while I do that? It's just shop talk. You'll get to meet Camila later." Chloe pouts, bottom lip full and pink, eyes sparkling like sunlight on the water, and it's just _so_ unfair. Her eyes widen.

"Jesus Christ, Chloe. How are you **this** beautiful?" There's some bite to it, but it's mostly astonishment. Nancy smiles like she's the one that was complimented.

"Mikey! Isn't she just the sweetest little thing?" Michael's observing her stoically. Nancy plows forward.

"Beca! Sweetheart, it's fine, go do your thing." She starts to drag Chloe away as her daughter whines.

"But Mooom! I wanna go with Becaaaa!" Beca beams, both pleased and amused by the giant child her girlfriend has become. Catching Chloe's eyes, she winks and blows a kiss.

Chloe lunges for it, hand clawing at the air and clutching it to her chest like it's the last thing she'll ever get. As she's being dragged away, she belts at the top of her lungs, " _Near, far, whereEEEVVEERR you are_ ," getting impossibly louder the farther down the street they go. Michael's hanging back a bit, pretending to check his phone as he walks behind them.

Her cheeks hurt from smiling so widely and her eyes feel wetter than normal. She cups her hands around her mouth, cutting Chloe off.

" _And my heart will go oonnn and onnn!_ "

And Chloe's responding smile lights up Ocean Drive.

* * *

Her meeting with Camila goes well. It's pretty short and all business. She has a much shorter list of clubs than the artist does, for obvious reasons. Nobody knows who she is, so she's just going to make sure everything goes according to plan while getting drinks on NSR's tab. Chloe's text message tells her they're at the botanical gardens.

She walks the short distance from the Setai to the gardens entrance. Once she's there, she kinda just wanders around, letting her girlfriend know she's arrived.

Looking around, she studies the exotic plants as she roams. Coming to a small red bridge, she stands in the middle and watches the little tadpoles in the small pond. Almost-March in Miami is a sticky time, and winter is a fading thought. She flicks a dried leaf off of the railing. It spins in the air as it descends, landing on the water with few ripples. She senses Chloe before she steps onto the bridge.

"A lot of people get married here, y'know." Her eyebrow arches.

"Oh yeah?" Warm arms encircle her.

"Mhmm. There are tons of wedding photos on this bridge." She can feel Chloe nosing around in her hair, breathing deeply and nuzzling. Beca brings her hand up to hold onto the arms around her.

"Where are your parents?" She automatically tilts her head to the side to make room for Chloe to kiss down her neck when the redhead slides her hair out of the way.

"Mm. They're walking around. Mom's giving Daddy a hard time for scaring you." Beca chuckles.

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure I almost pissed myself." Chloe shakes behind her in silent laughter.

"My dad scared my first boyfriend so badly he actually did pee his pants." Beca barks a surprised laugh at that. "What? Really? How'd that go?" Chloe shrugs, biting her shoulder.

"Well. He broke up with me because I was 'too clingy'. So." The redhead hums carelessly.

"Then he definitely deserved it." She's really puzzled that anyone would think that too much Chloe is a bad thing. "Did you like, knit him a sweater with your face on it, or something?" Chloe's giggles are loud.

"That's ridiculous. No. I just called him everyday. Though I did keep a lock of his hair in my binder and a vial of his blood." Beca snorts, leaning against the railing.

"Sure. I didn't know you were into voodoo."

"So much you don't know about me, Mitchell." She closes her eyes when Chloe pushes against her, placing her hands on the railing on either side and trapping Beca.

"Then tell me," she mutters. Chloe's kissing down one of her arms and even though it's nearly 80 degrees Fahrenheit, she feels goosebumps erupting on her skin.

"Well, you already know about the time I was stuck in Cuba," Chloe mumbles, so preoccupied that she misses the snickering from Beca. "Aubrey and I were lost in the swamp in Georgia the summer of our junior year at Barden." She tightens her grip on the rail when the redhead brings an arm down to run her palm up the front of her shirt.

"How'd that happen?"

"Our Bellas captain, Alice, decided we needed to get better at 'figuring things out'," Chloe chuckles, "so she blindfolded us and left us in the swamp." Beca hums.

"So, obviously you escaped." Chloe nods, coming to rest her head on Beca's shoulder when some people walk by.

"Yeah, but I had to make a fire for us and fight off an alligator." Beca spins around, eyes large.

" **What**?" She doesn't know why she's looking Chloe over like she just got back from this fight.

"Yup," she pops her lips, all casual, "Aubrey was screeching like gator food and I guess the big guy was feeling hungry. I had to tell him 'no', though."

"You just tell an **alligator** 'no.'" A cheery head nod.

"And what, he just left? Like, 'good day to you'?" Chloe laughs.

"Well, I had to gently nudge him with a stick. Then we figured it was best to just try and find a way back."

"Oh, okay. You just 'gently nudged' an alligator." Beca shakes her head, baffled at the mystery in front of her.

Chloe's hands are on her hips now, thumbs rubbing over her hip bones, eyes electric blue and peaceful. She grabs the front of the redhead's shirt, pulling her down as Beca leans up to connect their lips. Chloe sighs contentedly.

"I love the color of your eyes, Becs," she says quietly, biting her lip. Beca's eyes are drawn to the movement.

"So. Tell me more about people getting married here," Beca mutters, heart racing.

Chloe's breath hitches and she whines as she leans back a little to study Beca better. She feels her eyes go wide when the redhead starts blushing furiously. Chloe lets go of her to cover her face with her hands. Beca's eyebrows slowly go up.

"Wuuuhhh? Chlo?" Chloe shakes her head, face still hidden. Beca grabs her hands, lacing their fingers. "What just happened?" The redhead looks at the ground.

"I um. I was, uh. Nothing," she laughs somewhat breathlessly, "I was just, imagining things." Chloe bites her lip again.

"Oh. **Oh**." And now she's blushing, too. Because yeah, she can imagine as well.

Chloe in a beautiful wedding gown, ivory instead of pure white because they'd make jokes about virginity and purity even though Beca would secretly disagree. Chloe's the purest person she's ever known. A sunset wedding, maybe on the beach here in Miami or in California. Slow dancing at dusk, soft fairy lights and candles in the trees and on the tables. White and yellow flowers because those would fit Chloe so well. Yellow was **so** Chloe. How brightly her eyes would shine, surrounded by the soft glow of the lights around them. Tears to the brim but not falling until Beca makes a joke so bad that the redhead can't help but laugh. She can picture it. Exactly how Chloe would bite her lip and exactly how astounded her voice would sound as she spoke.

Yeah. Beca can imagine it all.

"I love you, Chloe." Her eyes feel watery.

Nancy calls to them from a little ways away, waving them over. Chloe looks back to her, dropping her head for a gentle kiss, sweet and simple and oh-so deep. Standing forehead to forehead, Chloe whispers.

"I love you so much."

* * *

Dinner with Nancy and Michael had been peaceful.

She didn't sweat overly much and she didn't throw up on anyone. Chloe was more than happy to answer for the both of them as much as she was able to get away with. Throughout the meal, the redhead would throw her shy looks and rub her thigh, squeezing affectionately.

Michael was mostly quiet as well, occasionally speaking and asking questions. For the most part, he just watched everyone, especially Beca. While the looks weren't bad, they were intense. Whatever he was thinking about was generating enough heat to reach her.

Nancy had hugged her tightly when they had to leave, pulling her close.

"Take care of my Chloe, Beca. Love her." She nodded, returning the hug.

"Of course. I wouldn't dream of doing anything less."

They were back in their hotel room now, getting ready to go to the first club.

She sighed as she thought back to the botanical gardens. The whole wedding daydream thing had gotten into her head and it refused to leave. It was frustrating because even though she was ready, she wasn't **ready**.

Beca couldn't offer Chloe everything she deserved. She wasn't financially stable enough yet, and she still kind of felt like a bit of a child. Though their age difference wasn't that big, there were some moments where Chloe really felt like a **woman**.

Calm and graceful, gracious and confident. Chloe Beale could bounce in full of sunshine or she could float in like a queen, commanding an entire room with her eyes. She was smart and funny and **totes** a badass. Chloe was sweet and sexy and utterly sublime.

And Beca? Well. Beca was two frumpy sticks and a ball of scrap yarn.

Realistically, she knew she wasn't that bad, that she had some redeeming qualities. She was musically adept, good enough to somehow make it a career. She was savvy enough to flirt her way into Chloe's heart. But she still didn't feel enough, and until she did, she couldn't ask Chloe to do _forever_.

But would she ever feel good enough? She was borderline insane.

And not just in the lack of self-esteem sense.

Ever since her out-of-the-blue promotion to junior producer, she's been having these... hallucinations. She'd hear weird noises, see strange things. Sometimes she wouldn't know what it was about a room that seemed odd and other times it was glaringly obvious, like the incident she dubbed 'the Ghost of Amy.' Moments as extreme as that one were exceedingly rare. It had only happened one other time, when she was in the storage room at TME.

 _"Where is that thing?" She dug around in the back shelf, pushing and sliding cases of brass instruments. She was looking for a particular alto saxophone they'd gotten over a year ago. It had come in and been summarily forgotten. She was hoping she'd be able to find it and put it to good use. Beca coughs when she accidentally shuffles a thicker layer of dust into her face._

 _They really needed to clean in here. She spits out something gritty._

 _"Ew. That's disgusting."_

 _She hears a clicking noise. It sounds like a lock spinning into place. Beca turns around, but there's nothing here. She scratches her nose and returns to the shelf._

 _In the corner, the forgotten instrument sits, its case covered in pink and green stickers. Beca fist pumps._

 _"There you are, you little bastard."_

 _As she approaches, she starts to notice a weird smell. It's hot, like something is burning. She looks up, searching for a burnt-out bulb but they're all fine. There's nothing. Beca decides to grab the sax and hightail it. She's midway through the room when a figure walks up from behind a shelf._

 _It's a man in surgeon's gear, scalpel in hand. She jumps, dropping the case and screaming. The surgeon approaches with the scalpel raised. Beca bumps into another shelf, knocking an empty box and some sheet music down. It's only a second taken to glance and register these things, but by the time her head turns back, the man is right in front of her._

 _She tries to scream again but his hand is on her throat. She scratches at his face, loosening his mask. He opens his mouth, and the noises happen again._

 _The loud clicking, sounding now like a large spider. Click click click. Click click click._

 _His face gets closer, and she hears multiple voices. His mouth isn't moving but its coming from him._

 _"Get out! Get out, get out! MOVE!" A toneless roaring erupts, and she hears the screams of other people from the surgeon._

 _He stabs his scalpel into the boxes behind her, sawing haphazardly as his eyes roll into the back of his head._

 _She's finally able to get his hand off of her throat and she falls to the side, slamming her elbow into the shelf as she goes down. She turns to kick him, but he's gone._

 _It's quiet again._

 _Tears burst forth, flowing down her cheeks as she hyperventilates. She feels trapped in her shirt. It's too tight and she can't breathe. She wants to pull it off but can't remember how. Beca tries to get up, but she isn't sure which way is up or down. Her crying becomes vocal, breaking and gasping. She's afraid to move._

 _She's afraid that it'll come back if she does._

 _Just as she starts feeling the hair on the back of her neck rise, the sensation of noiseless sound building and getting set to explode in a violent cacophony, the storage room door opens and it all stops._

 _Beca looks up into the concerned face of the woman she loves._

Chloe had been so, **so** worried. And she'd been so, **so** gentle.

Chloe had wrapped her up in a hug, having no idea what was wrong but shielding her from everything she could. She had sat, cradling Beca in the storage room and singing to her until she stopped crying, and then until she felt okay enough to move.

Beca couldn't tell her exactly what was wrong, instead saying that she's been so tired that she's freaking out a bit. She had no idea what was wrong with her.

And Chloe just never pushed, allowing Beca the time she needed to work through it, just like always. Never rushing, never hurrying, always there.

So how? **How** could Beca ask a wonderful woman like Chloe Beale to marry someone like her, who was this broken, **crazy** person? She had to fix herself first. But how could she fix what she had no idea was the issue?

She presses her fists into her eyes, lying back against the sheets in their hotel room.

"You just did your hair, babe. Sure you want to do that?" Chloe comes out from the bathroom looking like a vision.

It's a Little Black Dress, and it's perfect on her.

Cutting mid-thigh and hugging her curves, shimmering and sleek. Accentuated with a thin necklace and dangling earrings, bangles on one arm clinking as she pulls on her strappy heels. Her breath seems to have left and never returned. Was there even any air in the room? There had to be.

You can't have fire without oxygen.

And Chloe was burning hotter than the sun. She pushes up on her arms, completely mesmerized.

"Wow, Chlo." Chloe wrinkles her nose.

"Yeah? Not too much?" Beca laughs, a limp, airy effort. She isn't sure if she shakes her head or not.

"No. Definitely not too much. It's just right. **You're** just right." Her heart hurts.

Chloe giggles and winks. Why does her heart hurt so much?

She reaches for Chloe, bringing the redhead between her legs. Chloe beams at her, charmed beyond words. She bends down, planting her hands on Beca's thighs over her dress and sliding them up as she kisses deeply.

"You look really pretty in this dress, Becs." Chloe pulls her up by a hand, twirling her around and patting her butt. She smiles at the redhead.

Chloe had picked a dress out for her, bubbling with joy at the thought. Her dress was loose, fluttery and flowy. It was a bit longer than Chloe's, just brushing the tops of her knees. "Meant for dancing and spinning," Chloe had said when she'd handed the dress to Beca.

So she'd put it on, the silvery white complementing her skin tone well. Beca picks up her clutch and checks her watch.

"We should probably leave soon," she says as she puts her arms around Chloe's neck, reaching up the short distance to kiss her. Chloe hums and nods in the kiss, smoothing her palms along Beca's arms and onto her lower back.

* * *

The first club is packed when they get there. This was one of the clubs that both she and Camila would be at tonight, and it seems word had gotten around because the line was so far down the street that the people disappeared around the block. She takes Chloe's hand as they bypass and go straight to the bouncer. He looks them up and down, tapping his clipboard.

"New Sound Records. Mitchell. She's with me," Beca says, raising their joined hands. The bouncer nods, smiling genially and letting them through.

"Everyone's going nuts about this new song. It's supposed to be amazing." Beca smirks. She can't **wait** for Chloe to hear it. She rubs her nose.

"Yeah, thanks dude. We worked really hard on it. Camila's wonderful." Chloe starts bouncing at the name.

As they enter, the redhead leans down to speak into her ear, "So, are you going to tell me about the song? Don't think I haven't noticed that, by the way." Beca shrugs indifferently.

"You're going to hear it in less than an hour. You can wait, Chlo. It's a great song though. You'll love it. I wrote it about you." She shrugs again. "Well, the original, anyway. This is a little bit different." Chloe squeals.

"Oh! You're such a romantic! Writing all of these songs about me!" Beca really wants to laugh.

"I do. I write a lot of songs about you." Emily had burst out laughing when Beca told her about the song becoming such a huge event. She still remembers Bambi's rapping. It's still crazy that Buddy had loved it so much.

"I can't wait, I can't wait! Oh gosh. Let's go get a drink." Chloe drags her to the main bar, but Beca pulls her back and points over to the stairs, indicating that they were in the VIP lounge. The redhead's eyebrows jump in surprise and acknowledgment.

"I forget you're doing big things and becoming all VIP'ish." She shrugs.

"I mean, I don't really care about it all. I like music. I wouldn't mind being a nobody. The money is nice, though." Chloe brings her mouth closer.

"You've always been somebody to me, babe." She automatically smiles.

Sitting upstairs, she pokes at the cherry in her drink, trying to spear it but it keeps falling. Chloe however, was just fine.

The redhead gets hers on the first try, holding it between her teeth and burning Beca with her eyes. She pouts.

"How did you get it? My drink is broken," she whines. Chloe hooks her by the back of her neck, yanking her closer and nearly onto her lap. Beca yelps as she holds the drink out to keep it from spilling.

"Chloe!" She's ignored as the redhead directs her face down, fruit still held captive.

With a sultry wink and a wet little questioning whimper, Chloe offers her the cherry.

Maintaining eye contact, Beca drains her cocktail, placing it on the table and sinking a hand into Chloe's hair. She hears the redhead's breath hitch when she clenches her hand, grabbing copper curls surely.

Slowly, Beca leans in, running her tongue across Chloe's lips before pressing a kiss to them. She feels more than hears the whimper from her girlfriend, whose hands have fallen limp and merely sit on her waist. With a gentle bite, she splits the cherry and sits back, chewing with a confident smirk.

Chloe's eyes slowly flutter open as she finally takes her half of the fruit into her mouth and eats it. Beca could live in Chloe's eyes. She fetches the other cherry, but Chloe snatches it from her. With a simple arcing of an eyebrow, she waits.

Chloe, with hooded eyes and a sweet kiss, drops the red fruit into her cleavage. Beca jumps at how cold it is.

"Geez dude! A little warning?" But nah.

The redhead dives right in, arms coming around her to pull Beca's torso up and against her, holding her captive as she licks into Beca's chest for the second cherry. Her head falls back as her hands seek out Chloe's hair, sinking her fingers into them.

It takes far longer than necessary, but the redhead eventually secures the cherry, coming back up with a smile and a quick kiss. Beca warily eyes her.

"You got lost in there?" A wink.

"Maybe. It's easy to lose myself in you." And **okay** , that was smooth. She blushes.

Their Valentine's Day had been spent in Chloe's apartment, with dinner and wine. The redhead had scattered rose petals and set a bath in the candlelight. It was cozy and romantic and so Chloe that Beca had cried a little.

Still, she felt like she needed to do something, too. So she was hoping that this whole trip, meeting her parents and writing this song that would be playing across the country would make up for her being busy.

Camila coming up the stairs redirects their attention, and Chloe starts slowly leaking air and rising in pitch. Beca laughs and waves Camila over as they stand.

"Hi Beca! And hi! I'm Camila." She comes over and takes Chloe's hand, shaking it before bringing her into a quick hug. Beca's snort is pretty loud, but the redhead's face is priceless.

"Sorry, don't mind her. She's a little starstruck. This is Chloe, my girlfriend." Chloe nods, but her face is still kind of frozen in a shocked smile. "Maybe a lot starstruck. You get here okay?"

As they talk business, Chloe slowly thaws, apologizing for being weird and then they quickly hit it off. They're currently trading stories about Beca.

"Oh! I know! Isn't she just the cutest!?" And damn it all, why does everyone say that?

"I'm badass, not **cute** ," she spits the word out like it's dirty. Camila laughs.

"She is! When we first met, she was all, 'Miss Cabello' and I was just like, 'ew please don't call me that, I'm younger than you'." Both of them laugh as they ignore her. The music in the club lowers for a bit.

"Heeeeyyyy sexy people!" Wild cheers erupt from the lower floor.

"We're going to play Camila Cabello's new single! It's going to be a hit, I can feel it! Are you guys ready to feel it too?!" Whistling and more cheering. Beca's trying to hide her giddy smile as she watches Chloe get excited. A club employee brings a microphone over to Camila.

"Hi everyone! I'm so excited for you guys to hear this song! I worked very hard on it with everyone at New Sound Records," she winks at Beca, who winks back, "and I hope you all love it as much as I do! Here's my new song: Havana!"

As the club goes wild, Chloe's eyes briefly flit to her for a second before passing back out over the railing. Beca takes her hand and guides her to the dance floor. Ignoring the question on her face, she pulls them close together, close enough for Chloe to hear her sing the song playing over the speakers as they start to move to the beat. She can't wait for it to click.

" _Havana, ooh na-na. Half of my heart is in Havana, ooh na-na_." And **there** it is.

Chloe's eyes are wide, surprised as she connects the dots. She nearly stops singing, she wants to laugh so badly. Instead, she merely winks as she sings, dancing around and on Chloe.

" _He said 'there's a lot of girls I can do with'_ " She rolls her eyes as she sings that part, shaking her shoulders in a shimmy and poking Chloe in the chest for " _But I can't without you."_

She twirls, pressing her back to Chloe's front, dancing her fingers down the side of the redhead's face. Beca snags the edge of Chloe's jaw, bringing it closer and biting the underside and soothing with her tongue as she sways.

" _I'm doin' forever in a minute,_ " she bites her lip, because it's every other thought these days, " _That summer night in June,_ " winking as she sees the recognition of that particular memory in Chloe's eyes.

 _They've known each other for four and a half months now, and it just seems to get wilder. They're walking down Hollywood Boulevard. The place seems more alive at night than it does during the day. There's a different magic in the evening, she thinks. Chloe's strolling along with her as they laugh about something stupid. The background noise seems to fade in and out as she looks at the redhead._

 _She's a different kind of human. One crafted from the top shelf parts, made extra carefully and painted more exquisitely. Beca's so caught up in her musings that she clips a trash can and stumbles. Before she can embarrass herself further by smacking her face into the Walk of Fame, Chloe catches her._

 _With the kind of reflexes honed through rigorous discipline, Chloe sweeps by her, catching her by the middle and swinging her around until they're standing face-to-face with her arms folded to her chest between them. She expels the last of her gasp, staring into glistening eyes, radiant and excited from movement._

 _"Hey there," Chloe chimes, voice like a perfect fifth. She feels herself settle, a calmness flowing through her like a gentle river, powerful and deep and so unhurried._

 _"Hi."_

 _How many times has she completely zoned out when staring at Chloe? A whistle from a passerby._

 _"You gonna marry her, or do I need to?" A man calls out as he walks by. Beca isn't sure who he's talking to, probably her because Chloe's Chloe, but the redhead laughs and replies._

 _"Back off, buddy. This one's mine." And her grin is huge and sincere._

Yeah, she was Chloe's alright. From the moment they met.

* * *

 **AN: Songs: Celine Dion - My Heart Will Go On**

 **Camila Cabello - Havana (I've been waiting to use this song since chapter 4 lol)**


	11. 1 Year 2 Months

Her hands are shaking as she splashes water on her face in the bathroom. In the bright artificial light, she looks tired. She probably always looks like this.

Whatever horrid thing was making her hallucinate was now invading her sleep and the nightmares were starting to become ridiculous in frequency. Whether it was a nap or going down for the night, there was always something there, chasing her until she woke.

Sometimes there were people and other times it was objects or events. Amy, Cynthia Rose, Jesse. Burning cars, buildings, a big black dog with red eyes. None of it made sense but all of it was scary. One thing was constant though; Chloe was never in any of it.

Her girlfriend was never in any of her nightmares or hallucinations, and it all seemed to stay away whenever they were together. It was something that she was supremely thankful for. It was also extra incentive for her to be around the redhead; not that she needed any more persuasion.

But Chloe isn't here right now.

Beca is in her own apartment. She's been so busy that she didn't want to come in late and wake the sleeping redhead. She regrets it every time she does this.

She decides to try and work some more, booting up her laptop. Maybe the focus and music will erase the memory of Amy's bleeding body from her mind. Beca takes a deep breath as she hears a residual scream, remembering sitting over Amy's limp form. She shakes her head. There's a light knock on the door before it opens.

Jesse stands in the opening, rubbing his eye with the heel of his hand. He looks disheveled and like he definitely just woke up.

"You okay, Becs? I heard some noises." She turns back to face her laptop, nodding and grunting.

"Yeah dude, just a nightmare. I've been really stressed lately with all of the work." And it's not quite a lie, because she truly is feeling some pressure.

Her junior producer position had ramped up the amount of opportunity, meaning she was most likely taking on more than she should. But how could she say no when everyone had such high hopes for her? She couldn't disappoint them.

Plus, with the fast track that she was on, working with Buddy and Chelsea so closely, she might be a senior producer by next year. With the kind of money that she'd be making, she would be in a good enough position to propose.

If she could just stop seeing crazy shit.

But she never sees anything when she's with Chloe, so maybe marrying her and constantly being around her was the way to make it all stop? That sounded like a good idea.

* * *

"You're gonna love this, Becs. I think I found **the one.** "

Beca scoffs because, **_not likely_**.

Chloe insists that she's selected a movie that Beca will enjoy and it's not like she really wants to make the redhead sad. So she'll just sleep with her eyes open. Or hopefully she'll be able to convince her to do... other things. She gets comfortable on Chloe's couch.

The redhead pops the movie in while popcorn is cooking. When it's ready, she brings the bowl over, plopping down and tossing her legs over Beca's lap. Her hands go to the redhead's shins, rubbing along the length. Chloe purrs happily.

"So, what movie is this?" She sounds like she's asking for a root canal.

" _Mean Girls_ ," Chloe replies, flicking a popped kernel at her and giggling when it gets caught in her loose hair. Beca tosses the remote at her.

"Let's just get this over with, lady," she rolls her eyes, hiding her smile behind a huff when the redhead digs her heels into the space between Beca's thighs. She grabs an ankle and tickles the sole of her foot, cackling when Chloe shrieks and tries to jerk away.

They get wildly distracted.

Before Chloe knows it, she's got the redhead pinned underneath her, thin sweater bunched up as she kisses down her ribs, pressing her lips to each one.

"Becs," Chloe gasps with her fingers tightly wound on Beca's upper arms, looking like she wants to both push away and pull closer, one leg bent at the knee to frame Beca in. She hums, licking along the dips and grooves of the redhead's torso.

"B-B..," she gulps, taking a breath before trying again, "Bec... Baby," Chloe whines out, whimpering and rolling when Beca cups her through her jeans. She hums again.

"Mo-movie... We... We're supposed to watch..," the redhead's words cut off into a short cry when Beca moves to bite down on the junction between shoulder and neck, plucking the button of her jeans loose and slowly pulling the zipper down.

"Somehow, I don't think you really want to watch the movie anymore, Chlo," she murmurs, teasing her fingers beneath cotton. Chloe's eyes flutter open.

"I do. I want you to wa-ah!" Beca slips lower and into wetness. She smirks. Chloe glares at her and pulls Beca's hand out before she flips them over.

"Woah! Jesus!"

Chloe straddles her, trapping her hands up against the arm of the couch, breathing hotly against her lips. Her eyes roll back, shutting as Chloe slowly rocks into her, quietly moaning into Beca.

"Mmm, y'know what, baby doll?" Beca, in her disorientation, gives her a garbled answer.

"Hmmgahwuh?" Chloe chuckles in her ear, low and sticky. With one long, slow lick up the shell, she whispers, "I really want you to," Chloe **moans** , sounding like she's about to climax, " **watch** \- **this** \- **movie**."

And then she moves away and starts the movie, eating popcorn like nothing just happened. Beca blinks confusedly, feeling like she's trying to see through sludge. She can practically hear how pleased Chloe is with herself, but Beca's still too out of it to do anything other than blink and rub her face. She turns her head to watch the movie, smiling softly when Chloe caresses her calf.

* * *

"So," Chloe winks at her. Beca pops her lips, twisting them off to the side to maintain her deadpan expression.

"So..." Chloe shuffles closer.

"Did you like the movie, Beca?" She rolls her eyes.

"I dunno. Did I?"

"I think you did." Beca sighs.

"I have a thing for redeads," is all she offers, snorting loudly when Chloe looks mildly jealous of a young Lindsay Lohan. Beca crawls over to her girlfriend, climbing on top of her and covering her with kisses, ducking between defensive hands to put her lips anywhere she can. Chloe squeals, totally won over by the affection. She simply hugs Beca when she turns to dead weight.

"Hey Becs?" Beca hums, getting comfortable. Chloe combs through her hair.

"Can we talk about something?" Beca's eyes pop open, sensing that this is a serious conversation they're about to have.

"Uh, yeah. What's up?" Chloe looks uncertain.

"Well, I um, I wanted to talk about..." And Beca's eyebrows rise, understanding.

"I'm just stressed out and tired from work, Chlo," she tries to dodge. But of course she doesn't get away with it.

"Then why aren't you trying to lighten your workload? And if it's- if it's causing these," they both sit up, "if it's causing these... **episodes** ," Chloe says, tapering off into a whisper. Beca puts her hand up, slicing the air.

"Stop. They're not ' **episodes** '," she repeats Chloe's word, tossing it out quickly, "I'm **fine**."

"Beca! You're not! Jesse told me-"

" **Jesse**?! I'm going to kill him!" Chloe sits up straighter, taking Beca's hand and looking imploringly into her eyes. She glances away.

"He's worried! **I'm** worried! Beca! Everyone is worried!" Beca stands up and Chloe follows her into the kitchen.

"Great. Now everybody's worried because I can't sleep?" She knows she's downplaying it. More than one of their friends has found her in the aftermath a hallucination, panicky and confused.

"Becs! No! It's not just sleep," Chloe comes closer, standing by her as she grabs water from the refrigerator.

"Please, baby. Maybe we should go see a doc-" Beca turns away.

"No. I don't need to." Where are her keys? Chloe's hand hitting the island counter makes her turn back around.

"Beca! I am **talking** to you!", Chloe cries, eyes glassy, "I have been **trying** to talk to you about this for **months**!" Beca shrugs. She's shutting down again. Old habits, old habits.

"It's nothing, Chloe. I'm fine." She spots her keys on the floor by the island. Beca ducks down to get them, unable to look in the redhead's direction. Her throat is starting to burn.

"Oh my god! Beca! **I'm still a person**! Stop dismissing me!" That makes her stop.

"What?" Chloe wrings her hair, pacing. Her chest is heated, burning with emotion.

"I'm not making this about me, I'm not," she pulls at her hair again, "but I thought if I didn't push, that you would eventually talk to me. But you won't. You won't talk to me about something that is hurting you and **that hurts me too**." Chloe strides over, taking both of Beca's hands in a firm and desperate grasp.

"I love you so, _so_ much and you keep shutting me out." Chloe sinks to her knees, pressing their joined hands to her forehead.

"Please don't do this. Let me help you. Let **somebody** help you."

When did her eyes get so wet?

How many times has this made Chloe cry?

Staring down at the woman before her, head bowed and crying into their hands, Beca's heart tears. This isn't what she wanted to happen. **_You're supposed to fix yourself. You're supposed to get better so that you can marry her. Instead you're breaking her because you don't want to face it._** She kneels down, pulling Chloe into her arms as they both cry.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I," she swallows so her voice doesn't crack, "I just don't want to find out that I'm crazy. You don't deserve that." Chloe's head shoots up, eyes full of tears and fire.

"Don't tell me what I deserve, and don't you **dare** imply that I don't deserve **you** , Beca Mitchell." Chloe looks ready to slap her.

"You deserve the best me, not... not a cra-" Chloe jerks her forward and into a kiss. It's rough and needy, and if they weren't already sitting, she'd be on the floor.

"I want **you**. All of you. And I want you for as long as I can have you. Forever, I don't know," Beca's breathing stops completely, feeling her heart stick in her throat, "So please. Let's go see someone. Please." Beca nods, eyes closing and forehead to Chloe's chest.

 **Us. Let us** , not **_you_** go see someone.

Chloe wouldn't leave her. Beca just had to make sure that **she** stayed.

"Okay."

* * *

Beca's lying in her own bed when Aubrey comes over. All four of them had keys to the other apartment; it just made sense.

The blonde comes into the bedroom, closing the door and sitting in the computer chair, staring. Beca waits for her to say something as she fiddles with her laptop.

She waits an entire ten minutes, in which not a single word is said. When Beca opens her mouth to question Aubrey, the woman glares at her until she shuts it. Eyebrow arched, she waits again.

It's another five minutes before Aubrey is ready to speak.

"You made Chloe cry." Beca frowns. Aubrey continues.

"You aren't going to leave her, are you? Because of some stupid idea that you're not good enough?" Beca sighs.

As opposite as she and Aubrey were, there were some things that they just understood about each other. They both grew up with a strong sense of inadequacy and unworthiness, insidious sentiments that lurked around them into adulthood. While it was nice to share the same wavelengths of mental and emotional understanding, Aubrey was older than her by about four years and so she had more experience in navigating her own emotions. This meant that she knew the blueprints intimately, having solved her own problems.

Though Beca's issues were different, they also followed a similar pattern.

"No. No, I'm not leaving her. We've already been over this, Brey. Chloe's it for me. But," she sucks her teeth, trying to word her turmoil, "she's so... I need to be right for her." The blonde crosses her arms.

"That sounds a lot like you saying you don't think you're good enough." Beca shakes her head.

"Nothing is ever going to be good enough, because Chloe is something out of this world," she ignores Aubrey's smile, "I just want to give her the best version of me. Right now, I'm barely sane enough to handle myself," she forces out around gritted teeth. Beca closes her eyes, resting her forehead against the edge of her laptop.

"Chloe told me you have a doctor's appointment on Monday." Beca nods, not looking up.

"Yeah. So they can tell me I'm crazy and give me some drugs that'll turn me into a bunch of slush. That'll fix the problem."

"Well, I think it'd be nice to at least find out what's going on. You can always decide from there," Aubrey says practically. She gets up, brushing down her skirt and tucking the chair back in.

"You and I are friends now, Beca." Beca snorts, knowing that Aubrey would glare at her but mirror the smirk. "But I still stand by what I said before: Don't hurt Chloe." Beca smiles softly.

"Or you'll have wolves rip my vocal cords out?" Aubrey scoffs as she's leaving the room.

"No, Beca. I'll rip them out myself."

* * *

"Beca, it's okay," Chloe says, kissing her knuckles. Beca fidgets.

"Yeah. I know. I'm just," she shrugs, "thinking too hard."

They're waiting at a private practice and honestly, Chloe's grip is the only thing keeping her from bolting. The longer she waits, the worse her imaginings become. By the time they're called in, she's picturing them carting her away in a straitjacket.

She really hates the crinkly paper they have on the examining table. Chair. Table. Whatever.

A tall, older man walks in, hair graying. He shakes her hand and turns to the computer, reading the information that's listed there.

"So, Miss Mitch-" Beca coughs.

"Beca. Just Beca, please." The doctor smiles.

"Beca. I'm Dr. William Anderson. Why don't you tell me why you're here today?" Beca frowns. Chloe, noticing her beginning to withdraw, simply pats her knee.

"I uh, I've been having trouble sleeping," she glances at Chloe, seeing her nod encouragingly, "and um. And I've been... been-" she shakes her head, groaning, "I've been seeing... **things** ," she spits out. Dr. Anderson nods, typing into the computer.

"Can you tell me about these things you're experiencing?" He says neutrally and softly.

"Err. Like, I've been really stressed out with work. I had a big promotion really quickly after starting and they've been giving me a lot to work on, so I think that might have something to do with it," she says, waving her hands about. The doctor nods, not turning around as he types in what she's saying. She takes a deep breath and continues.

"So, sometimes I get headaches and stuff. And I'll hear noises and smell things," and everything just starts to come out, finally given the chance to get it off of her chest.

"And like, I'm- I'm... I'm **seeing** things. Like, people and whatever. People I know, strangers, animals. Some of it is creepy. I can't sleep at all, even a nap. I have nightmares whenever I do." Chloe keeps her face carefully plain, but Beca can see the worry through her eyes, rolling and dark like a stormy ocean.

"Alright Beca. Well, before we proceed, I'd like to perform a brief examination, and then see about getting you over to our resident neurologist. I think an MRI may help us." Chloe's nodding for her, so she can just square her jaw and exhale slowly through her nose.

He pokes and prods at her, shining the damn light into her eyes. After a bit, he goes to the computer to input more information.

"So, Doc, am I crazy?" It's **kind of** a joke, kinda not. He hums.

"I wouldn't say that. In fact, everything seems perfectly fine. We'll do our best to find out what's going on." It's very little consolation.

It seems to be a slow day at the office because they're sent off down the hall for a lovely brain scan. **_No time like the present..._**

"I thought you couldn't eat for like, thirty days before this thing," she grumbles, hating the smell and cold air of the building. Chloe rubs her arm, consoling her.

"I guess it's a good thing that you don't have to abstain, because you just ate me out earlier," Chloe says as casually as if they were discussing the weather. Beca blushes, choking on nothing as the nurse jerks in surprise. She tries to pretend that she didn't hear the conversation behind her even though she was going to answer Beca's question.

" **Chloe**!" The redhead shrugs.

"Want me to tell you how much I liked it?" Beca's eyes are as big as dinner plates.

"Ga- **No**! Woman!" Chloe snickers and bites her tongue, catching Beca's hand so she can't run away.

Beca gets changed, complaining about the gown. Chloe drops another inappropriate comment, this time about her butt. Beca accidentally makes eye contact with another nurse as they both blush. Chloe laughs.

The whole process is pretty calm, but it does very little to quell the nerves.

At the end of it all, Dr. Anderson pops his head in just as she's finished dressing.

"Beca, we'll look at the results and give you a call." She grunts, nodding at him. Chloe pulls her into a hug. She just wants to get out of here.

In Chloe's car, she stares out the window, trying not to think on the only thing she can think about. Chloe slides her nails down the side of her arm, linking their pinkies.

"Sweetheart, it'll be alright. I'll be with you the whole way. Everything will be okay." She shrugs, head on her fist.

"We don't know that for sure," she replies, eyes on their linked fingers. Chloe's got red nail polish today. Beca studies the differences in their hands, admiring how the two shades of skin complement each other. She twists her wrist to clasp Chloe's hand. Beca watches as her girlfriend starts her car, checking her mirrors before reversing.

"Chloe?" The redhead hums, light and relaxed as she pulls her hand away to shift. Chloe picks her hand up again, pressing a kiss to her knuckles. Beca's heart squeezes, moved by the redhead's casual dedication.

"Thanks for being here, with me. Even through," she waves her other hand around, twirling it in a circle, "all of this crazy stuff." Chloe's humming along to a song, shaking her head briefly at Beca's comment.

"It's not crazy, and **you're** not crazy. Stuff happens. Life happens. I love you. I'll be here," Chloe flashes her a quick wink, "You're not getting rid of me, Mitchell."

* * *

Beca sits up, startled awake. Chloe's asleep beside her in her shared apartment with Aubrey.

It's been a week since her doctor's visit and they have to go back tomorrow.

She's been working tirelessly, only sleeping when she can lay down with Chloe. The one time she tried napping at work, she'd woken up to the terrible sight of Cynthia Rose crying in the studio. It took a couple of minutes for her to realize that it wasn't real. Beca looks around, searching for whatever woke her up. Chloe shuffles closer to her, still asleep and seeking warmth. She decides to go use the bathroom.

As she enters the hallway, she notices the light on in the kitchen. It turns out to be Aubrey, sleeping at home since Jesse is with Benji tonight. Beca walks over, making noise so Aubrey knows she's coming. The blonde looks up from her mug.

"Hey, Beca. What's up?" She shrugs, scratching her head.

"I woke up randomly. You just get back?"

"No, I was making some hot chocolate. Want some?" Beca leans on the counter, resting her cheek against the cool tile.

"Nah, I was gonna go to the bathroom and get back to sleep. I'm exhausted," she says right before a yawn overtakes her. Aubrey chuckles.

"Chloe said your next appointment is tomorrow. How are you feeling?", the blonde takes a slow drink, watching her from over the lip.

"Nervous. Glad to maybe get some answers, but nervous about what I'm going to find," she confesses. Aubrey nods.

"We're all here for you."

Beca grimaces, knowing that Aubrey meant it but **everybody** means that when they first say it. Most people quickly drop away when faced with the reality of a struggle. Losing weight, battling mental illness, bettering yourself, fighting the establishment, whatever. Anything that required actual effort usually scared people. Aubrey seems to know once again, narrowing her eyes.

"Well, you've got a lot of people that care about you. At the very least, have faith in Chloe," Aubrey rolls her eyes, "and me, because Chloe's my best friend and that's how this works." The blonde takes another sip, "and Jesse. Because he's your best friend, too." Beca laughs quietly.

"You don't have to pretend that you don't care about me, Brey. We've known each other long enough" Beca goes over, poking Aubrey, giggling when she dodges. The blonde puts her mug down, batting aggressively at Beca's hands.

"Don't you **dare** , Mitchell. I will write up legal documents forcing you to attend my wilderness retreat again." Beca jumps away with a scowl.

"You're evil," she mutters. Remembering the last trip, she adds, "though, I could just have Chloe drag you into the mud again..." The blonde arcs an eyebrow.

"I'll be sure to put up more 'Beca' traps. I mean, bear traps." Beca snorts.

"I knew it." They both laugh. Beca steals a sip of the blonde's drink before going to the bathroom.

She really hates cold toilet seats.

As Beca washes her hands, she hears the water in the shower running. She leans back from the sink to see beyond the shower curtain, but there's no water coming out of the taps. With lightning-fast realization, it hits her that it's another hallucination. A wave of fear rolls over her and she tries to steady her breathing.

She doesn't want to scream out for someone like a scared child, but there's no use denying her fear to herself. She slowly dries her hands.

When she turns to leave, the light above the sink flickers. Beca jumps, plastering herself to the wall by the door. She smells fire, a dirty, chemical burning rather than wood fire. The air feels thick and hot. Beca tries to open her eyes wider when the air in the bathroom begins to turn smoky and thick. A slow pulsing at the back of her head starts, sharp like a needle. She moans and bends down as the pain intensifies.

"No... no no no... This isn't supposed to happen..," she mumbles, confused. Chloe was right down the hall. Did whatever protection the redhead provided stop when she was asleep? Beca slides closer to the door, feeling for the handle when she hears scratching coming from the bathtub.

"Fuck fuck fuck no," she mutters as she feels herself panicking more. It's starting to dull her reasoning and she struggles to escape before she's pulled even further into this waking nightmare.

Just as she has her hand on the handle, the scratching stops and she hears Amy's voice, deadened and high-pitched.

"Whaaaatttt are we going to dooo, Be-ca?" She turns the handle, stumbling into the hallway just as she turns her head to catch a glimpse of the alter-Amy.

Her eyes are rolled into the back of her head, and she's bleeding down her face.

Beca falls onto the ground in the hall, scrambling away before looking at the open door of the bathroom, light still on. When she feels someone come up behind her, Beca lurches into the wall, desperate to put something at her back.

Aubrey stands there, hand outstretched and an alarmed look on her face. Beca exhales heavily, on the brink of another panic attack. She feels the edges of her vision blurring and everything feels like a threat. Distantly, she registers Aubrey kneeling down and talking to her.

It isn't until Chloe's there that everything starts to settle.

Warm arms surround her and Chloe starts singing. A gentle, quiet crooning as they rock together. Beca buries her face into Chloe's neck, breathing slowly and deeply.

"I've got you. I'm here, baby. I'm here," Chloe soothes, voice mellow. Her voice sounds like the hot chocolate from earlier. The redhead murmurs something to Aubrey, who nods and leaves.

They return to bed, where Chloe continues holding her and singing. The redhead strokes her back, occasionally alternating with petting through her hair. Beca sighs.

"I'm here if you want to talk, baby," Chloe whispers with no pressure. Beca shifts and clears her throat, curling further into her girlfriend.

 ** _Baby steps._**

"I uh. I was in the bathroom," she has to pause for a second when her voice becomes too tremulous, "and I heard- I heard water running in the shower, but nothing was there." Chloe nods, holding her tighter and encouraging her to continue.

"And I just like... I just **_knew_** that it was another one, and- and then it smelled like smoke." She takes a deep breath. "Then there was... I saw Amy in the shower." Beca can tell that the redhead is curious but unwilling to push.

"She was- was- was like, **dead** or something. I don't know, she was bleeding and her eyes were white and her **voice** ," Beca shudders. Chloe kisses her temple, rubbing up her arm with a soft but firm pressure. Beca groans.

"When did my life become like a horror movie?", she whimpers.

Chloe rolls over her, sheltering her. Surrounded by the vanilla of Chloe's scent and the cinnamon of her hair, Beca feels herself relax. Nothing ever hurt her here, with the person she loves most. Beca leans up to press their lips together, quickly losing herself in the comfort she finds there.

The more she pushes, the more Chloe gives, letting her take what she needs. Beca nudges the redhead until she lies down. Looking down at Chloe, neck bared in supplication, eyes bright and loving, chest heaving slightly, Beca is overwhelmed with a strong need to mark her. With a lunge, she bites down on the swell of Chloe's chest. The redhead gasps, wild and hot, arching up into Beca. The sound spurs her on, like a flame chasing her, dancing at her heels. She drags her hands up the sides of Chloe's body, moving her shirt with it. At a particularly hard bite to the redhead's neck, Chloe whimpers. Beca pulls back a bit, staring into lucent eyes. She imprints a soft kiss to Chloe's nose, a stark contrast to her aggressive attentions.

"Let me know if I'm hurting you," Beca whispers, tracing along Chloe's cheek. Chloe turns her face into the palm, kissing it. Her eyes are shining, an argent crystal blue.

"You won't hurt me, baby. I'm yours." Beca rests her forehead against Chloe's, taking a bit to calm down, because she wants to be _rough_ to the brink of pain in an effort to ground herself. She takes a ragged breath. Chloe pulls her head up, biting her lip, and the sting sets off something inside of her.

All of the emotions that she's been bottling up, all of the pain, the fear, the stress and anger of her ordeal come pouring out, guiding her movements in an ardent march. Chloe accepts her out-of-control ministrations, keening and sighing as Beca licks and strokes against her and inside of her with fervor. Feeling like a wild animal, she bites Chloe's inner thigh, sucking and bruising. The redhead cries and bucks against her fingers, gripping her hair tightly.

"Ah- Oh god. Becs, baby- ooh," she breathes, eyes shut and chest rising and falling like frantic waves. Beca moans as she returns to Chloe, tasting and feeling how close she is. Chloe comes undone around her, tightening and with a high moan, body rolling and jerking, heels digging into the bed.

"You're so beautiful, Chloe," Beca murmurs against the skin of her stomach, kissing up languidly. Chloe smiles dreamily, eyes still closed as she runs her fingers through Beca's hair.

"I'm sorry if I broke you," she quips once she reaches the redhead's neck. Chloe giggles, stretching and humming with a light moan.

"Mmm, I don't mind in the slightest, because wow," Chloe winks, turning over so they're lying side by side, legs intertwined. Beca curls into her, kissing along her jaw. Chloe adjusts so that Beca has more room to peruse.

"I love you. Thank you. I needed this, and I need you," she laces their hands, "forever." Chloe's eyes are shimmering.

"I love you, too. And I need you just as much," Chloe sighs, kissing the knuckles of Beca's hand in her grasp, "forever."

* * *

They're back at the doctor's office. Her foot won't stop its tapping on the floor, and bless Chloe's heart, the redhead is resolutely not commenting on it even though the unending staccato is bothering her. Beca shifts nervously in their room, staring at the poster about eyeballs and how they work. Dr. Anderson comes in, holding a clipboard with some sheets on it. He sits in the rolling chair.

"Okay, so, Beca. We've gotten the results from your MRI back, and I've consulted with the neurologist and our psychiatrist." Beca's eye twitches, but she doesn't say anything, willing herself to stay silent until he's done talking.

"We've found a little bit of bruising," he gestures to the back of his head, "not a lot, but it was noted. May I check it out?" Beca frowns but nods, turning so he can poke the back of her head.

"Does it hurt?" Beca shakes her head, but says, "Usually my headaches start from there." He hums, writing something down.

"It's possible that this is the reason for your hallucinations. Did you hit your head on anything?"

"No, I don't remember hitting my head there at all," her brow furrows.

"How long have you been having the headaches and everything else?" Beca scratches her head, thinking.

"Um, a while now. A long time. The uh, the hallu- hallucinations are recent, like a couple of months, maybe three? The headaches have been on and off for about a year, I think." The doctor rolls over to the computer to type something in. He rifles through the sheets on the clipboard.

"And nightmares?"

"Recent," she mutters. Chloe rubs her back.

"Okay, well, I'd like to get you in for another scan, say maybe a few days, but for now, I'm going to prescribe you some medication," he says as he writes the scripts on a pad. Tearing a couple of sheets off, he hands them to her and Beca tries not to reflexively toss it into the trash. She smiles tightly.

"So, is this going to cure me?" Dr. Anderson glances at her softly.

"We don't know, Beca. There's so much about the brain that we're still learning. The body expresses itself in so many different ways. All we can do is try to help, and treat the symptoms as best as we can." She knows he means well, but the thought that the drugs won't get rid of everything makes her more upset. With a quick nod, she gets up. Chloe scrambles to follow after her, thanking the doctor.

After they pick up the medication, Beca fiddles with the bag, shaking the pills and bottles as she sits at Chloe's island. The redhead comes up behind her, hugging and laying her head on Beca's shoulder.

"Are you going to take them?" Beca shrugs.

"I don't know. I don't want to, but maybe I'll see how it goes," she grimaces. Chloe brings a bottle of water over, kissing along her shoulder as she returns to her place. With a heavy sigh, Beca takes the medication. Aubrey and Jesse come in as she swallows her mouthful of water.

"Hey Becs. How did the visit go?", Jesse asks as he takes his keys and wallet out of his pocket to place them on the island. She pouts.

"I hate everything," she whines, drinking more water. Chloe coos, squeezing. Jesse comes over to kiss the top of her head, to which the redhead swats her hand at his face, putting herself between Beca and him.

"Mine!", Chloe barks, and everyone laughs. It lightens the weight in her chest a little, that they can still be silly like this.

* * *

 _"I can't stay with you, Beca," Chloe says, packing the last of her things from Beca's apartment. The redhead doesn't look at her as she goes about her business._

 _"Chloe! Please! Please don't do this to us," she grabs at Chloe's shirt, tightening her grip so that she can't move away. Chloe glares at her. "Please, let me fix this. I love you." Chloe shrugs._

 _"It's not enough, Beca. What we have isn't real," the redhead says simply as she yanks her shirt out of Beca's grasp, continuing to pack. She stuffs a shirt into a duffel bag on the bed, picking it up and walking out of the room with it. Beca follows her out, pleading._

 _"How can you say it's not real?! I **love** you! I want to be with you!", she yells, hot on Chloe's heels._

 _"I love you, too, but Jesus, Beca. Wake up already. It doesn't change **anything**!" Chloe rolls her eyes, opening the door to her apartment. "I'll come get the rest of my things later." Beca follows her to the doorway._

 _"What needs to change then? Chloe? Chloe!"_

"Beca? Beca!" She rolls off of the bed, landing hard on the floor in tears. Chloe kneels down by her, gripping her arms tightly. "Beca? What's wrong?"

Beca opens her mouth, but seeing Chloe in person again so soon after such a terrible dream, she bursts into fresh tears, sobbing loudly and clinging to Chloe. The redhead waits, answering her unspoken plea and just being there with her. Beca pulls her down into a desperate kiss, crying against her lips, whimpering and burrowing as deeply as she can into Chloe's arms. When they finally separate, Beca takes a heaving gasp, letting it rattle out wetly.

"I- I- Please don't leave me, Chloe. I know I'm going crazy," she continues speaking over Chloe's denial, "but please, I love you and I don't want to be with anyone else, in this world or the next or anything after." Chloe looks concerned, cupping her cheeks and studying her.

"Darling, I would never leave you," she wipes away the trails left by Beca's tears, soft like a brush over sand, "You wanna know why?" Chloe tilts her head, not truly waiting for a reply so much as giving Beca a second to really hear her words.

"The moment I saw you, I knew that there was something special about you. You were so nervous and awkward," Chloe smiles fondly when Beca snorts and rolls her eyes, "and God, I can't believe I'm about to admit this, but," Chloe bites her lip and looks nervous, glancing away for a second.

"I had no intention of ever learning how to play guitar," she confesses in one long, quick breath, wincing a bit. Beca's eyes widen.

"What?" Chloe nods guiltily.

"Yeah, um, it was," she laughs, embarrassed, "I was... You were so cute and I thought you were really hot and before I knew what I was doing I was trying to learn how to play the guitar." Beca laughs in surprise. Chloe shakes her head.

"But that's beside the point. You, Beca," she presses a kiss to Beca's lips, "I've known that I loved you for a long time. I'd be pretty dumb to give up something that made me feel this way."

She can feel her cheeks pulling up, knows she's grinning somewhat stupidly. But the immense amount of relief she's experiencing combined with the burst of love she feels has her face doing things. Things like crying and smiling. She leans her head back against the bed, sighing when Chloe leans in to kiss up her neck.

"Chlo?" The redhead hums, gently nipping along, grazing her pulse point. "I'm sorry we missed your birthday." Chloe takes her hand, bringing it up to kiss her fingers.

"I don't mind, the little thing we did was just fine, sweetheart." Beca pouts.

She had been so busy and exhausted from lack of sleep that Chloe, being as caring and attentive as she was, had simply opted for a small dinner and relaxing. While she knew that the redhead was happy with it, Beca herself was dissatisfied. Someone like Chloe deserved much better than some personally written songs and a paltry dinner. She just had to figure something out. Beca giggles when Chloe nips at her pouting lip.

"Don't pout so much, cutie pie." She smirks at the redhead.

"Then why don't you give me something to smile about?", she grins at Chloe when the redhead pulls her on top of her lap, gripping at Beca's waist with a challenging raise of an eyebrow. Chloe thrusts her hips up sharply, winking when Beca gasps.

"I think I can manage that."


	12. 1 Year 4 Months

**This chapter goes through Beca's experience with medication in some time jumps.**

* * *

"What?"

Beca's trying not to stare. Really.

But it's a difficult urge to control when every other thing she sees these days is illusory. And so she's kind of just... looking unblinkingly at Emily. Who may or may not be real. She's subtly freaking out.

Bambi's complexion is best described by the word 'gray'. Aren't gray people usually zombies or ghosts? But her behavior isn't very typical for Beca's usual hallucinatory visitors, so she's confused.

They're in the studio, Beca sitting at the soundboard while Emily hangs in the back like she usually does. Normally, she's verbose and cajoling Beca into participating in the trading of jokes so terrible they'd give Jesse a run for his money. Now though, she's just occupying space on the couch, taking raspy breaths and other than an acknowledgment at the very beginning, she's been silent.

So Beca hasn't said anything, hasn't paid her any real attention other than the first "Are you okay?" that had left her mouth. Experience has taught her that trying to interact with her imagined conjurings only exacerbates the situation. Just a second ago, she's sure Emily had said something - only it was more like the scraping of stone over stone as the lid of that abandoned well in the forest is opened instead of actual words. She breathes slowly as she hears the noise repeated. Emily is staring back.

"Err, Em, can you- can you like, maybe repeat that? With uh... Y'know, so I can hear you," she tries, already mentally calculating the distance between her chair and the door, how many tucks and rolls it'll take to seamlessly transition from soundboard to hallway, where there are less dead-ends and more escapes. Emily rattles again.

"Wh- what... are you-" she coughs, hacking and hawing, "...working on?" It isn't until Emily sneezes like the grayest little rabbit to ever stumble out of Snow White's woodland home that Beca relaxes. Zombie-esque pallor or not, that tiny "achoo!" with the nose twitch was too cute. Beca sighs with affection and relief before returning to the equipment.

"It's that song that Buddy wanted for my junior producer test," she says, adjusting something and then turning her head to smile at Emily. "Wanna hear it?"

Bambi smiles around a leaky nose, making a face and pouting as she cleans herself up. Listening to the song play, Beca takes the time to observe the younger brunette.

Emily was another person that never showed up in her hallucinations. Lately, however, she was beginning to doubt if there was anyone who was truly safe, because she'd begun seeing Chloe.

It wasn't anything crazy, mostly the redhead would turn up in her negative dreams on occasion, sometimes she'd see a passing glimpse of Chloe floating by. But the frequency of these things was starting to increase and that was not something she wanted happening.

"It's really good, Becs," Emily sniffles. She sounds like she's talking around a pillow. She still does her little 'happy clap' though. "Has anyone else heard it yet?" Beca bobs her head.

"Yeah, Bud heard a bit of it but he's going to do some final checks later. You're the first to hear this much of it, though." Bambi rocks back and forth like she's in a rocking chair and Beca snorts at the image of a grandmother Emily with the same smooth skin and energy, with a short mop of curly silver hair and spectacles on a beaded chain.

* * *

Beca dry swallows more medication. She hates it.

Everything has started to blur for her. Her days and nights and emotions, it's all kind of dull. She rests her head on the island in Chloe's apartment. There's a stain on the counter that's been hidden by the pattern of the granite, but she can see it from her angle. It juts out from the smooth plain around it like a little mountain.

She has no idea how long she stares at it. In the background, she registers Chloe talking, possibly speaking to her but she can't find the necessary brain cells needed to form the proper pathway for listening. So she just watches the tiny mound in front of her. Sliding her hand next to it, she pokes the spot. It's dry.

Eventually, Chloe comes up behind her, rubbing along her back and most likely repeating her question or statement or whatever it was she was saying, but Beca's just now remembering that the redhead was even there. She sighs.

"Huh?" Chloe's face appears in front of her. Was it always there?

"I was asking if you were okay, but I'm thinking the answer is probably a 'no', Becs," Chloe responds. Beca shrugs. Chloe's probably used to this version of her. She gets up.

"I'm gonna go take a nap." She shuffles by the redhead. Chloe mumbles something but she decides to just keep going. It probably wasn't important anyways. She's tired.

* * *

 _"Hey, Becs. Guess what?" Chloe laces their hands together as they drive, going down Interstate 5 headed north. The redhead's cousin was visiting Sacramento. Beca wiggles their joined hands, watching the movement ripple up Chloe's arm and they laugh at the noise their arms make as they flop back down between them._

 _"Chicken butt?" Chloe barks a laugh, cutting it short by pressing her lips together and shaking her head._

 _"You're such a dork. Why do I love you?" Beca shrugs._

 _"Because I'm 'cute'," she makes air quotations, taking Chloe's hand with her, "and romantic and who else is going to write top 40's hits about you?", Beca says. She amends by stating that anyone who had the ability to would probably write music about her. Chloe beams._

 _"You're my fav, Becs," the redhead sighs. Beca just nods, playing at serious. She's sternly listing all of the reasons why she should be the most favorite when it happens._

 _A noise like a blaring of horns rings loudly, drowning out the radio. She frowns and looks out of the windows to search for the source of the sound. Chloe turns the radio off._

 _"What's that?" Beca furrows her brow. She feels anxiety and the sensation of something building._

 _"I don't know..." As she's searching for the noise, she catches sight of the reflection in the sideview mirror._

 _It's completely black, devoid of light and existence. It seems to follow them at a steadily increasing pace, ripping up the road as it approaches and sucking in the cars behind them. Beneath the shrill cry of horns is the toneless roar of wind blowing. She turns back to tell Chloe to maybe drive faster or something, or maybe she wants to scream, but Chloe's watching her with a sad look. She looks like Beca's just disappointed her, and that makes absolutely no sense._

 _"Chloe?" The redhead parts her lips to reply with that same sad expression when the driver's side door flies open. Beca screams, grabbing at her and trying to pull her back. "Chloe!"_

 _She's yelling, pulling, but the only sounds around them are the wind and the horns. In the midst of all the chaos, the thing that sticks out most is **that look** , like Chloe's just **so** tired. _

_Wind whipping her hair around like a gorgon, Chloe squeezes her hand once, tightly. Then she lets go and leans out of the car. Before Beca can even blink, Chloe's gone. Beca doesn't finish screaming because she blacks out._

 _Lying in the wreckage, surrounded by concrete and metal, she hears an approaching ambulance. Or maybe it's already here? She doesn't know. There's a figure above her, talking, prodding her. Everything's blurry and noisy and simultaneously quiet, like hearing a storm from underwater. Beca sits up._

 _The person pulls her over to a body underneath a sheet. Beca has no idea what they're saying, but she somehow just_ knows _what she's been instructed to do._

They didn't cover the body properly _, she thinks, as she stands above it, looking down into what she knows is going to make her sick. And as the sheet is pulled back, she knows what she's seeing is correct. But it's all so wrong._

 _"Do you know this person?" Beca scoffs, because_ yes _, but why would anyone ask that? Everybody knows. Who didn't know? Where there was Chloe, there was Beca. Where there was Beca, there was Chloe._

 _Or, that was how it was supposed to go._

 _What is this? This isn't right. This wasn't Chloe._

 _This was a body, with the same beautiful red hair and the same blue eyes that stared unseeing off into the distance. This was wrong._

 _"Ma'am? Do you know this person?"_

 _Yes? No? What was the right answer? The person is talking again, asking about something, the morgue. Beca feels everything start to shift, a subtle movement as her hearing starts to come and go. She begins to sway violently as she watches them load Chloe's body into a bodybag. The sight makes her sick._ **They're so careless.** _Don't they know how important she is?_

 _She hears something snap, crunching sickeningly._

Beca jumps out of bed, running to the bathroom nearly blindly, checking the doorframe with her shoulder as she races to the toilet.

Her stomach is empty but she can't stop retching. She feels Chloe behind her, sees her sitting on the lip of the tub. The redhead rubs her back silently. Beca tries to whimper out an apology but it's lost between the heaving and the moaning.

When she's finally done, she's overtaken by shivers and the uncomfortable feeling of something sticky rolling down her arms. Chloe wets a hand towel under the tap and hands it to her. She appreciates the warmth and scoots over to the bathtub. The redhead sits down next to her, offering her comfort. Beca leans her head back onto the tub, eyes closed and exhaling. Chloe hums to her, the same song she always hums in these moments. It's a gentle little lullaby.

"I'm losing my mind." She presses the heels of her hands into her eyes, groaning. Chloe disagrees.

"You're not, baby. You're just... we're just fighting a battle right now," she says quietly, stroking along Beca's knee. Her breath hitches, despair gripping her with a blinding tightness for a second before it releases her.

"I never used to have nightmares around you, Chloe," she starts angrily, "Now? Now I can't get away from them. Now, you're **in** them." Chloe's hand stills.

"W-what do you think that means?", the redhead murmurs hesitantly. Beca shrugs, a great and grievous upheaval, dropping her shoulders back down like buildings crashing.

"I don't know. I don't know, but I **hate** it. I hate that almost every time I go to sleep, I see you dying," Beca cries, sniffling. She buries her head between her knees and arms. She grips at her hair as Chloe hugs her. "I can't take this." Chloe's arms tighten around her.

"Please don't give up." Chloe sounds as heartbroken as Beca herself feels.

She really has no idea what to do. Her hallucinations are getting darker. She's hearing whispered voices, one or two or twenty or a hundred. Talking, shouting, goading and grating.

 ** _Make it stop, Beca. Make it stop forever._** She takes a shaky gasp.

 ** _Come play, here in the dark. It won't hurt._** She shakes her head.

 ** _Everyone's tired of you, always screaming, always crying. But we like you._** She growls.

"Get out of my head!" Beca slams her hand into the floor, knocking Chloe away in her rush to cut off the speaking.

 ** _We can't. We're part of you. But she isn't._** She pulls at her shirt, absurdly trying to pull the voices out. Chloe's talking to her but she can't hear. Beca stands up and grabs her medication from the sink, quickly inhaling it like she's racing. Maybe she's running.

 _ **Take your pills. They'll calm you down. You won't feel like such a worthless burden.**_

With a strong burst of clarity, she remembers her first nightmare involving Chloe, the first time she took the antipsychotics. She's moving to get rid of them when everything changes.

In the time it takes her to move a single step, she suddenly finds herself in a dark room. It smells metallic. There's a single light above what seems to be a door. Beca spins in a circle, looking around.

There's a toilet against one wall, a bathtub against the far side. A large, metal three-compartment sink takes up the final wall, leaving the door to have its own side. Everything is metal, with the exception of the floor. It's concrete and angled to a central drain. A clanging from beyond the door attracts her attention.

It looks like the door is struggling to move, rocking and shaking. She whirls back around when the toilet flushes on its own. When that's done, she finds the door opened like it was always that way. Beyond the room, the hall rises up into the darkness, its ceiling cloaked in shadow. At the far end, there's a light, blue-green and hazy. She hears something in the room with her, but doesn't see anyone. When the bathtub begins to bubble, full of a dark and viscous liquid, she decides to move. It was better than sitting here.

Beca takes hesitant steps, ignoring the feeling of being watched as she travels down what seems to be an ever-expanding hallway. A high-pitched whine pierces her ears, like a grinding of metal gears, a very obvious breaking and bending. She puts a wall to her back and glances back the way she came. When she turns to continue her trek, she comes face-to-face with Aubrey.

Only, it isn't Aubrey. Not alive.

It's Aubrey, black and gray and purple, eyes missing and hair torn. It's Aubrey, chewed through in places like she was in the process of being eaten before she got up. Over her bitten shoulder, she sees a similarly destroyed Jesse, clawing his way out of the wall and towards her. Beca feels a surge of adrenaline, filling her to match the obscene level of panic as this deadened Aubrey reaches out for her, fingers curled like a claw. As Beca moves on instinct, she remembers Chloe, a soft voice whispering to her in this terrifying madness.

 _"You have to move more fluidly, Beca. Tai chi flows like water," Chloe intones. Beca grimaces._

 _"How? You want me to just, like," and she flops around bonelessly. "Wavy inflatable arm-waving tube man!", she hears in her head. Chloe laughs so hard she holds her sides, bending over and crying, stumbling like a drunken goat. Beca's both pleased and annoyed because while she was trying to make Chloe laugh, it was also somewhat an earnest attempt. When the redhead is done laughing at her, she comes over and squeezes her hips from behind, sliding her fingers along the lines of Beca's body until she's tracing her hands. Chloe grasps both, backs of Beca's hands to her palms as she pushes and pulls Beca with her._

 _It's like a dance. Chloe moves like a river, taking Beca along, ebbing and flowing, both gentle and firm, giving and taking. The redhead sweeps their arms in wide arcs in calm but quick motions, bringing one set close to Beca's chest before twisting and sweeping back out. Chloe steps away, continuing the movements and moving her legs, gliding around like she's a wind nymph._

 _"Flow, Beca." And she's nodding, but also wondering when the badass part comes in. She says as much. Chloe raises an eyebrow at her._

 _"Okay, I guess some self-defense can't hurt. Bajiquan is a bit different, though."_

 _She really has no idea how, but Chloe flips her in a way where Beca's pretty sure she just flipped herself. With a steely determination, she demands that the redhead teaches her every single weekend until she gets this down._

It's one of those first sets of moves Chloe taught her that she uses now, taking Aubrey's outstretched hand and pulling it down to destabilize her. Beca brings her arm up and shoots it out over Aubrey's far shoulder, catching the blonde's neck in her elbow and dragging her down to the ground to kneel above her. She's cocking her arm back when she notices it.

Aubrey's eyes are bright green and wide in fear.

Beca's swing goes wild, turning herself to avoid hitting the very real Aubrey beneath her and instead catching the air, twisting her body until the momentum sends her into the wall. She feels a sting in her fingers, but she's more horrified by her actions. She scoots as far away from Aubrey as she can in the narrow hallway. Her hands fly to her open mouth, gasping into them.

"Oh my god." She's not sure if she actually says it or if it's a bunch of shaky stutters. Her chest feels tight, but the more she tries to breathe, the harder it is for her lungs to fill with air. Jesse and Chloe stand nearby like tangible shadows, felt yet without true form. Someone's talking, but she can't stop staring at the floor long enough to focus any other senses. The knowledge that she could have seriously hurt Aubrey just now is making her nauseous. She feels arms around her but they're not Chloe's.

Aubrey's hugging her, whispering to her but Beca's crying too hard to hear the words. The blonde kisses the top of her head, petting through it. Eventually, her speaking starts to make sense. Somehow though, it still doesn't. Beca clears her throat.

"Um, what are you singing?..." Aubrey's voice is low and calming. It's quite the departure from her higher, no-nonsense, refined chiming.

"You don't know Ace of Base?" Beca stirs in the embrace.

"I... What? Um, bless you?" Aubrey lightly smacks her arm.

"Beca! They're a classic! Come on, everyone knows 'The Sign'!" And she starts singing the lyrics again, letting go of Beca to stare at her with incredulity. Only, she gets the same exact type of stare in return, because **who** would dig something out of the 90's as dusty as this song to console someone with?

She's doused in a fresh wave of self-hatred when it hits her that this same woman singing to her is the very same one she tried to hurt not fifteen minutes ago. Her sobered expression causes Aubrey to take her hand, smiling softly at her.

"It's okay, Beca. I'm not mad." Beca frowns.

"I **am**! Aubrey, I just **attacked** you! I-" The blonde rudely stuffs her palm onto Beca's mouth, shushing her when she protests.

"Beca. We're here for you, remember? You didn't hurt me," she reminds her. Beca sees Chloe and Jesse kneeling down by them. Beca wants to say more, but when she opens her mouth she ends up crying. She sniffles through her apology, surrounded by people she loves. Jesse hugs all of them, bunching them together and saying something about sardines.

* * *

"Wait wait wait," Beca holds her hand up, palm out like she's trying to stop his words. "You want to do **what** now?" Dr. Anderson scratches his chin.

"Well, we'd like to up your dosage," he says calmly. Beca's nodding but not agreeing.

"Right. That's what I thought you said," she pinches the bridge of her nose. "That is definitely not happening." She can hear him getting ready to reply, can pretty much hear the air flowing into his lungs for his rebuttal, but she cuts him off.

"Did you not hear what I **just** said? I told you that everything got **worse** when I started this medication. It didn't get **better** , so what the hell would make you think that **more** is going to help me?", she scratches a hand through her hair. "God, I thought I was fucking crazy before, but this shit makes that old crazy seem normal!" She's gearing herself up when Chloe adds her bit.

"About a third of patients who use antipsychotics don't experience any positive effects, and it's generally found that increasing the dosage does not increase the effectiveness. Perhaps there is something else we could do, doctor?", she mentions coolly. Beca gapes at her. Dr. Anderson rumbles uncomfortably.

"Uh, yes. There's therapy as well." Chloe nods.

"We're interested in hearing about that."

The doctor prescribes more medication, which Beca sneers at but doesn't do anything else. He talks them through the therapy, the why and how and who. He's mostly talking to Chloe because Beca is ready to spear him.

* * *

Beca watches the water swirl in the toilet, taking the last of the drugs with it as she feels a phantom touch, cold and slimy down her back, making her skin crawl. **_Good riddance._**

Her medication had helped in the very beginning, but it started something that hadn't happened before: Chloe was being included in her nightmares and hallucinations.

The dreams were fairly standard at first, Chloe leaving her or them fighting, starting from the first night she took the drugs. From there, it escalated to various scenes of Chloe dying. Chloe being shot, Chloe in a car accident, Chloe getting sick. And Beca always, **always** had to go through the rest of that dream burying Chloe or identifying her body. It wasn't until she had seen Chloe in a hallucination, melting into the wall as she screamed, that Beca shouted a resounding "fuck that biz" and stopped.

The added vision problems, random anxiety, and insomnia hadn't helped, either.

And so she had quit. Without the medication, at least she was safe around Chloe.

When they'd gone back to the doctor's office, the new scan showed no more bruising, no new damage or previous damage aside from a slight mark. Everyone was confused, but Beca was counting blessings. And Chloe was over the moon. Beca washes her hands and steps out of the restroom, going into the studio to put the finishing touches on the song she had written with Chloe's help all those weeks ago. Buddy looks up as she comes back in, a giant smile on his face.

She'd come to them, anxiously explaining her situation. Buddy had been horrified, immediately doing what he could to take some stress off of her. Tony, who had been walking by, insisted that he was going to force her to take a break.

Which he actually did.

He'd rallied the senior staff that worked with Beca and they'd all made it happen. Beca now had a very hastily decided five-day vacation. Tony had apologized about not being able to secure a longer sabbatical and she merely laughed in surprise.

"So, Rain, what are you going to do for your vacation?" Beca shrugs.

"I don't know. It all kind of happened so suddenly." Buddy nods, moving some nobs and pushing sliders while he held one side of his headphones to his ear.

"You taking the missus somewhere special?" Beca starts.

" **What**?" Buddy looks over.

"What? What 'What'?"

"'Missus'? Do you mean Chloe? We're," Beca sputters, "we're not married, Buddy." He laughs.

"'Yet', Rain. You're not married yet." He gives her a knowing look. She blushes.

"Okay, so like, maybe I **want** to. But I just like, I'm still dealing with a lot." He gives her a carefree shrug, a halfway jerk of his shoulders like he can barely be bothered to do even that.

"And do you think Chloe loves you any less right now, or that she'll love you more after you get better?" Beca sighs.

"Well... no, but-"

"Great! Then that's solved," he claps his hands, grinning cheerily at her. "Susie down in Accounting told me that you have more than enough to get a pretty rock for your pretty rock. 'Cause she's your rock and all," he winks, snickering at his own pun. Beca rolls her eyes.

"That was terrible."

"Terrible? No. True? Yes." She sighs again, because it was true. It didn't have to sound so corny, though. Turning back to the equipment in front of them, he presses the button to play the music.

"Tell me what you think about this little masterpiece of yours, Rain."

As the song plays, Beca's mind drifts back to working on the song with Chloe.

 _"I think it'll sound better with a brighter vibe." Beca nods, gesturing for her to continue. Instead of speaking, Chloe sings._

 _"_ Over and over, waves of running feelings, _" she croons, bouncing her hand in time to the beat in her head, pink nails catching in the light as she sails her hand through the air, "_ Floating weightless, I'm willing, _" Chloe pauses here, tilting her head. "I think it should go up a little there at the end." Beca smiles. Chloe isn't really in the present, more immersed in her musical reality, calculating and composing. Chloe continues._

 _"_ My will keeps bending and breaking, honey. _" Chloe really was too humble. She should be a star. Her voice was like wine, heady and intoxicating. It was such a vibrant soprano, but the redhead knew how to dig deep, projecting a clear lower register. She had mentioned something about nodes and bass notes and it made Beca laugh, because of course Chloe would say it like that, like it was nothing._

 _Chloe turns to her, smirking and winking as she sultrily warbles, "_ Hold me, trust me. Help me ride in your love all night, babe. _" Beca doesn't move from her spot in the kitchen, watching Chloe work her magic with a sense of wonder and gratitude._

 _When the redhead's done, she turns to Beca, a smile on her face. "So, Beca, what do you think?"_

She had thought it was perfect. They'd changed it for a lower timbre and added a male voice to balance it out, injecting a bit more romance with a duet. In her mind, Chloe's version was the best. And Beca could totally sing the other part.

She stretched, leaning back and texting Chloe with the phone held above her head. The redhead sent back a bunch of emoticons, several hearts and kissy faces, as well as a crying one. Beca wrinkles her nose at how giddy it makes her, because Chloe hadn't actually said anything.

They finish out the rest of the day with Buddy teasing her incessantly, mimicking those kissy face emoticons and winking outrageously at her, bursting into fake tears at the front desk and startling Violet. Beca hadn't known how to feel when she had gotten her vacation, but now, she couldn't wait.

* * *

"Pfft- ptooey," Beca spits out a mouthful of Chloe's curls. The redhead lets loose a gale of laughter as she rolls away, hair flowing and flying with the motion like a bullfighter's cape. Just the comparison makes Beca want to chase her. Chloe wiggles around on Beca's bed, stealing the pillow that Beca slept on, hugging it and taking a very noticeable breath. She brushes back some red hair, lightly tugging on Chloe's ear.

"Hey. So, I've been thinking," she starts, glaring at Chloe when she mutters a quiet "uh oh" and tosses out an impish wink. "We kinda missed your birthday." Chloe huffs and moves the pillow behind her. Beca plucks at the bottom of her own thin, flowy tank.

"Becs, we really don't need to do anything more. I'm just happy that we're here, together. I'm happy with what we did." Beca isn't. She'd been sick and tired and all sorts of out of her mind. It's only recently that everything has calmed down. Talking to Chloe and her therapist about her struggles and reducing her intense schedule helped greatly. It wasn't completely over, but it was much better.

"Chloooo, come on. I've been forced to take a vacation. Why don't we do something?" And she's so caught up in her pouting that it's too late by the time she sees it.

Chloe's arm shoots out from its place against her side like a coiled python, coming around to drape itself across Beca's lower back and bite down. The redhead pulls her in, bringing them flush and Beca feels the air rush out of her lungs like they've been summarily popped. The squeak that comes out of her as she braces herself against Chloe is a little embarrassing, because you'd think that after knowing each other for this long, that she'd be able to get at least a bit used to these feelings and surprises, but it's a fresh jolt every single time.

And isn't that a blessing in itself?

With her hands resting on Chloe's collarbones underneath her silky blouse, she looks up through her lashes, heart lurching uncomfortably. Her fingers twitch on soft skin involuntarily and Beca's hit by a wave of appreciation for Chloe's excellent moisturizing routine. The redhead's smirk, small and threatening, seems to magnify the effect that her eyes have. It's a constant mental reset and she can't grasp onto a thought long enough to finish it. She has to ask Chloe to repeat herself, which causes a rumble of laughter that transfers from Chloe's chest to hers, shaking her heart like a subtle earthquake.

"I **said** , we could do something, **right now**..," Chloe says lowly, squeezing her for emphasis, rolling her hips like a wave of lava and punctuating the end with a strong knee against the apex of her thighs. Beca feels the movement through her entire body, rippling like several shockwaves.

It's not quite a word, what leaves her mouth. Not quite a groan, not quite a sigh. It's a lot of noise that's pulled from deep in her throat. Ripped, really, because Chloe moves with the accuracy of a bird of prey, diving from the skies at breakneck speeds, striking with precision into her gut and spilling heat like Beca's full of dry tinder and Chloe's got a thousand sparks cupped in her hands. The redhead drops those little flecks all over her with the kind of careless abandon that only a seasoned vet could, assured that everything will find its mark.

She thinks that Chloe's pretty well-versed in all things 'Beca'. Definitely enough to make her a veteran.

Her reaction sets Chloe off in a way that would have scared a teenaged Beca, someone who was inexperienced and unsure. Chloe presses into her again, soaking up the responding sound with an eager mouth like she's the only source of air in the room. Which is a ridiculous thought to have because Beca is very obviously full of fire and anything and everything that burns hotly. The redhead licks deeply and almost languidly, drawing her out and unraveling her. She's in way too far when she realizes that she hasn't had any air in a while. Beca inhales noisily through her nose, whimpering when Chloe bites her lip, taking it with her and soothing it with her tongue. She lets it go with a 'pop' and turns her attentions down Beca's neck. Directs that line of fire across a pulse and along the column of her throat.

Her hands, which have so far been fisting uselessly between them and occasionally scratching at Chloe's collarbones when they manage to move, have finally been remembered. Beca brings them up to cup Chloe's cheek with one and sink the other into the titian hair at the base of her skull. The feeling reminds her of when she's wrapped up in her freshly washed duvet, warm and soft, so fluffy that she wants to melt into it and so comforting that it brings her a sense of peace. She accidently yanks too hard when the redhead scrapes her teeth along Beca's pulse point. Chloe tilts back to look at her.

Chloe pins her with something she can only describe as wantonly hungry. It's a predatory gaze full of fiery desire, like a lioness slinking into position. The redhead pulls Beca's thigh up, gripping tightly and rolling with purpose, picking up a rhythm. It's a gentle stoking of the flames, burning low in her belly like a handful of coals, not showy or flashy but indisputably hot. Her eyes shut of their own accord as she gasps.

Being with Chloe truly feels like a divine meeting. And while she's believed in some sort of something up there for a while now, maybe the flying spaghetti monster, she's never quite thought about it with the kind of consideration that Chloe spurs her to. The redhead is like a walking religious experience. It's terribly, horribly cheesy and even in her adulthood she wants to cringe. But there is no other moment in the entirety of her life that is as deserving of such a description because the way that Chloe moves is like everything that Beca loves about music.

There is no bad part, just a million different angles from which to appreciate something. The lows are deep and soulful, harmonic and filling and anchoring, grounding her and perfectly contrasting the beautiful highs that they reach together. The soaring melodies, the dancing and weaving runs, the dipping and caressing of bodies in a way that she's never before had the pleasure of encountering.

And Chloe Beale is an experience that's utterly incomparable.

As the redhead rolls on top of her, aggressive and so passionately **careful** , treating Beca like she's something precious enough to handle gently, Beca's overcome with awe. Looking into the face of the woman she loves, with blue eyes full of fire and the cutest little smirk she's ever seen, Beca knows there has to be _something_ out there. Because how could anyone describe Chloe as anything _other_ than divinity?

Chloe, who Beca calls 'Aphrodite' for so many reasons that are all fitting and not remotely exaggerated. Chloe, who walks so smoothly it's more of a glide, who has an innate grace that can shame professional dancers. Not that she would, because the redhead is also startlingly humble for someone as talented as she is. How can Chloe be anything other than a goddess herself, who, rather than being a gift from the gods, is the one who is gifting?

Beca definitely feels like she's been given something special.

Chloe, with her eyes like crystal, is carefully observing her, drifting her gaze over Beca like a feathery caress and she feels it across her skin just the same. They lie there, curtained on either side by copper locks, and it sucks the air out of the room and out of her lungs. It takes everything out and replaces it with a rolling wall of flame, burning like ecstasy. Her hands hurt with the weight of everything Chloe's invoking within her and she seeks to soothe the nearly literal pain by touching the redhead. She finds Chloe's skin to be pleasantly cool. Chloe sighs, stretching out and blanketing Beca, tracing fingers down an ear and across a jaw to lightly poke her nose. Beca frowns exaggeratedly.

Not because she's actually bothered, but she knows that that kind of reaction will make Chloe laugh. The ensuing tinkling huff is worth every time she becomes a caricature of herself. Chloe leaves a drop of a kiss on the ridge of her cheek and Beca feels the muscle there pulling her lips up into a curve.

"What are you pouting about there, hot stuff?", Chloe asks as she returns to her languorous admiring of Beca's neck. She hums as she skims her fingers up and down the redhead's back, picking at the hooks of Chloe's bra when she encounters the fabric. When she finally decides to answer, she also casually unhooks the garment and slides her palms to the front to push it out of the way. Chloe sighs in appreciation and nips a little harder.

"If you don't want to use my vacation days for a birthday thing, let's just go do a uh, like, a regular vacation, dude," she mumbles, directing one of her hands from front to back to swat at Chloe's backside when the redhead chuckles at her. Beca squints her eyes when Chloe's hair shakes enough from her humor to catch on her eyelashes. Chloe jerks her head to the side once to dislodge them.

"I'm getting sexy with you here, and you just called me ' **dude** ', Beca," Chloe chortles, bracing her weight on one arm so that she can pinch Beca with the other. She barks a reprimand as she flees into the other arm of her traitorous girlfriend. After a quick battle of flailing limbs and cries of 'uncle', they calm down to resume their unhurried petting, lying side by side.

"Is there anywhere you want to go?," Beca asks as she undoes the buttons on Chloe's blouse lazily, relishing each inch of exposed skin. Chloe drags her hand along the dips and peaks of her side at an insouciant pace, slowly pulling up her loose tank as she goes. She leaves it bunched up when she trails back down. Then Chloe looks at her and does the thing, and it makes Beca fall a little more in love.

" _Over the hills and far away, a million miles from L.A.,_ " Chloe sings, a single finger searing along Beca's skin from her waist up and across to the valley of her breasts, nudging the material of her shirt higher before skimming down to her navel. " _Just anywhere away with you._ " The color of Chloe's eyes reminds her of the way the air smells after a good rainstorm: clean and full of energy and refreshing. She takes a deep breath.

"What song is that?", she asks as she finishes unbuttoning the blouse, pushing it open and running her hands underneath. Chloe sits up slightly to take it off, returning with a ridiculously graceful plop after tossing the shirt off of the bed and chasing it with her bra. The redhead props her temple against her fist and yanks unsubtly on Beca's shirt. She sits up.

"I just made it up. Why?" Beca stops in the middle of removing her top, one eye peeking at Chloe in astonishment. Honestly, she's both not surprised and yet a tad shocked because in that short snippet of guilelessly earnest reply, Beca had heard the opportunity for an entire song. **_And Chloe has no idea how amazing she is._** Beca jerks and takes the shirt off the rest of the way.

"Do you even know how talented you are? Like, seriously, dude," she tosses her hand up between them, pressing down on Chloe's mouth when she readies what Beca **knows** is a tease. She can see it in the twinkling of baby blue eyes. Chloe licks her palm, winking when Beca grimaces to hide how intensely her insides seize up. She's pretty sure the clenching of her jaw gives her away, though. Still, sticking to her game, she plays at unimpressed and wipes her hand on the sheets between them.

" **So** gross, dude." Watching Chloe laugh loudly at her, bold and carefree - and totally topless, but who's focusing on that? - Beca feels a calmness settling inside of her. Chloe snaps the front clasp of her bra open, pushing it out of the way with only a minuscule amount of reverence before pulling Beca in using nothing but the sheer magnetism between them. A promising little "no cooties, remember?" bridges the last second of space before they sink into each other.

She might not know what the future holds, but as long as she has Chloe, she knows she'll be fine.

* * *

 **SONG CREDITS: DUA LIPA - LOST IN YOUR LIGHT FT. MIGUEL & RITA ORA - ANYWHERE**


	13. 1 Year 4 Months cont'd

"So where are we going?" Beca shrugs at the question, shutting the trunk of Chloe's car. She comes around to the driver's side, where the redhead is leaning against the door. Beca briefly admires her attire. It's an off-the-shoulder white tee and a red camisole whose shade matches the scribble details on the shirt. Jean shorts and ballet flats complete the casual look, accented with a leather bangle and white watch from Beca's collection.

"That's for me to know, and for you to be surprised by. Now give here," she says, holding out her hand for Chloe's car keys. Chloe sticks out her bottom lip, batting her eyelashes and sliding into Beca's space like she's always been a part of it. She squares her jaw and keeps her eyes trained on the shrubs to avoid being swayed. Her determination is a little harder to maintain, though, when the redhead starts to press herself against Beca, hands roaming and drifting under the bottom of her heather purple t-shirt. She grunts. "Stop it."

"If you would just **tell** me..." Chloe murmurs, looping her arms around Beca's neck and using her locked hands to drag her in. She knows what Chloe's doing, knows she's being played like a fiddle right now. She hates that it's kind of working. Not that she'll really tell Chloe, but she'd confess a lesser secret for sure. She sighs when her girlfriend nips across her neck.

"Well, since you didn't want to help me decide, you don't get to know. Deal with the consequences, Chlo," is slowly said as her hands slide along Chloe's waist to meet at her back, pinching. Chloe emerges from her neck with her pout at full power and Beca feels her heart jolt at the sight. Those baby-blues stick her to the side of the car and she leans her head back to rest against the roof, spreading her legs and planting her feet as her hands sink down to hips. Chloe doesn't seem to mind, only lowering her head to follow Beca and bringing her hands around to toy with the collar of Beca's shirt. A red nail catches her chin, pushing her up to receive a chaste kiss. Beca laces one of their hands, running her thumb along the back of the redhead's.

"Maybe," Chloe whispers as she inches closer, breathing her words against Beca's lips, "I want to have my cake," she dips her head and gently pulls at Beca's bottom lip, biting down, "and **eat it** , too." Beca's hand slips lower down into the back pocket of Chloe's shorts. She strokes her tongue along Chloe's confidently, inching her finger around the loop of a keyring. The redhead's getting lost in the kiss, pushing harder into Beca and if they weren't totally outside in broad daylight, she'd perhaps let this go a bit further. As it is, Beca's pretty sure one of her neighbors is watching them from a window. With great reluctance, she ends the kiss to duck away and yanks Chloe's keys out of her back pocket as she goes. Chloe opens her eyes dazedly, hands still hovering in mid-air before bracing against the car.

"You totes just manipulated me, Bec." She stifles a laugh at her girlfriend's voice, thickened and so, so out of it. Biting the inside of her cheek, she maneuvers Chloe to the passenger side, ghosting her lips over a cheek dusted with a blush as she opens the door for her.

"Sorry not sorry. We have to get moving," Beca replies as she hops into the driver's side. She's finding some suitable driving music by the time Chloe returns to her normal self. The redhead leans her head on the headrest, watching Beca.

She's never needed her own car out here since everything was either within walking distance or she'd go with Jesse. She'd occasionally get a taxi or something but that was pretty rare. She laughs when she spies Chloe trying to catch map directions on her phone. Beca had come prepared, though. The path was memorized and so there would be no spoiled surprises today.

"Y'know, what if you need to take a break? How am I supposed to drive if you don't tell me where to go?" Beca snorts at the query.

"I'll manage," is all that she supplies. They weren't going far enough for her to have to take a break, but it was best to keep Chloe guessing. The redhead's inability to withstand her own curiosity was cheap entertainment for Beca. She swats at the encroaching hand, sweeping away the nails tickling her thigh. "I'm driving," she huffs as she merges into the traffic going south on Interstate 5.

"Are you really not going to tell me for the entire trip, Beca?" Beca bobs her head, because yes. She had to ask everyone else for their thoughts, and that was a small ordeal in itself. Her eye twitches with the phantom pain of that endeavor.

 _"So," Beca says as she sits down with their group of friends in her and Jesse's apartment. Of their total group, Benji, Ashley, Cynthia Rose, Stacie, and Chloe were missing, all working. Jesse stretches out beside her, placing his arms across the back of the couch. Aubrey brings her hand up to lace her fingers through his by her shoulder. Emily's sitting against the front of her legs, swaying side to side. Lilly's perched on the arm of the couch next to her. Jessica and Flo share the loveseat and Amy is striding around with a drink, occasionally stopping next to Lilly to pet her. Jessica gets comfortable, shoulder to shoulder with Flo as she turns to look at Beca._

 _"What's up?" Beca scratches her cheek._

 _"Well, I've got this vacation," she starts, pausing as Amy hums loudly around her random concoction of alcohol. The red solo cup crinkles. "I um, I'm not sure what to do, but I want to take Chloe somewhere. And-" Amy hums again, this time high and purposely interrupting._

 _"And you want my advice on how to love a ginger, yeah? How to get down and dirty?", she asks as she scratches Lilly's head. The Asian woman purrs._

 _"Uh..," she stumbles. She can sense how awkward Aubrey feels on the other side of the couch. "N-no, not exactly, but thanks, Amy." She shifts, coughing. "I actually just wanted some ideas on where to take her." Amy nods._

 _"You sure you don't want any tips? I'm strictly about the sausage, but I know how to do some things with my tongue. The Aboriginies taught me-" Emily squeaks. Flo nods and sits forward._

 _"In my country, we would take our lovers to the base of the Mayan pyramids and dance before our ancestors." Somehow, this discussion makes sense to the two of them and they break off into their own conversation. Jessica laughs._

 _"Well, Beca," she starts, trading places with Flo as the Guatemalan adjusts to speak more easily with Amy, "I think you could take her anywhere and she'd be happy."_

 _"Yeah, but I want ideas!", she whines. Beca knows that Chloe's fairly simple in that regard. She's getting ready to complain more when Aubrey says something._

 _"How about a spa?" Beca nods, considering it._

 _"Definitely not a bad idea. She likes all of that stuff..," she drifts off, leaning forward to hug Emily. She tightens her arms when Bambi's swaying moves her as well. The younger brunette fakes choking noises._

 _"Don't hurt 'em, Bec!", she wheezes, convulsing and wildly shaking her head, whipping her hair into Beca's face. Beca sits back, nudging Emily with her knees._

 _"You gotta be gentle, Em!", Beca barks out around a laugh, nudging harder and between her sideways swaying and Beca's pushing, Emily looks like a wobbly tornado as she jerks in different directions. She sounds like she's driving on a really bumpy road. Jesse snorts._

 _"You guys sure you aren't related?" Aubrey chuckles at that._

 _"It definitely seems like you two are. You're like sisters," the blonde states. Emily nods._

 _"We talk about everything. Beca tells me about Chloe a lot. We trade notes on how to jam, and it's really helped with Benji." Beca chokes, staring at Emily's profile. That totally did not sound right. Emily was definitely talking about writing music and singing, but inserting that between mentioning their partners made it sound like-_

 _"Shawshank, I didn't know you were like that," Amy wheedles out like she's trying to laugh and hold her breath out of suprise at the same time. Beca slowly exhales._

 _"Yeah... That's not- that's... no..," she coughs. "Emily's talking about music. Right, Em?"_

 _Emily has the audacity to turn around and wink at her, tearing a page right out of Chloe's book. It makes her want to both smile and frown. Everyone hoots as she rolls her eyes._

 _"Let's get back on track. I kind of like the spa idea," she says to Aubrey. Amy adds her two cents._

 _"There's this swanky place down in Del Mar." She includes a bit about men and lewd acts that Beca filters out. "They've got rooms with fireplaces and private balconies."_

 _"That actually sounds good. Just the spa... not the... other stuff." Amy seems disappointed. "What's it called?"_

She'd booked a Del Mar Suite at L'Auberge Del Mar. It was the most luxurious of all the rooms, with a wet bar, living room, fireplace, king-sized bed, balconies, and, what was sure to be Chloe's favorite, a separate roman tub. She'd also gotten the most ridiculous spa package she could. They probably massaged your thoughts and put cucumbers on your car. Beca didn't know, but it was the most expensive so she selected it. When she called for clarification, the hotel staff were very helpful and interpreted her "I don't know, dude. Just get me the best everything, please," professionally.

* * *

She really doesn't know what to do with Chloe.

Beca suspects that Chloe's been trying to figure out where they're going by asking to go to the restroom every thirty minutes.

What should have only been an hour and a half drive turned into two and some change due to their frequent stops and the redhead's need to converse deeply with every gas station attendant. Beca fills up on the third trip, deciding in her boredom to dump some of the coins from the bits Chloe had in her center console. It comes out just over two dollars. Pennies are a necessary evil, it seems.

"Uh, yeah, just... put this on pump nine, please." She shares a look with the attendant before his attention is drawn to Chloe as she passes by to go to the restroom. Beca gives him a minute to stare, because she gets it. She does the same thing all the time. When she's pretty sure he's about to drool though, she snaps her fingers in front of him. He starts, shaking his head like a wet dog and his shaggy hair reminds Beca of one. **_Scruffy._**

He apologizes and puts the money into the register. Beca decides to hang around and wait for Chloe. As she's browsing the snacks, the redhead emerges, heading for the counter. Beca puts the off-brand chips down, something called 'Prongles', and sneaks up to watch Chloe lean against the counter, tapping her nails against the surface. The cashier doesn't seem to know what to do with his face. Or his eyeballs. They're darting everywhere.

"So, are there any fun things to do around here? Maybe romantic things?" Beca wonders if Chloe realizes how naturally flirtatious her voice sounds. _Ahah. Caught._ Beca approaches as the poor kid stutters about beaches and restaurants. With a heavy hand, she smacks Chloe's butt, turning her hand to hook her fingers into a back pocket and yank before the sound is finished moving through the air. Chloe yelps, spinning around in a hurry. She has her mouth open, probably ready to yell, but it closes upon seeing Beca. The redhead looks guilty.

"You are a spoilsport, Chlo," she chastizes, shaking her head. She has to close her eyes when her girlfriend pouts, though. They were almost there. She just had to stay strong.

"Beca!", is whined loudly. She walks away, ignoring Chloe's drawn out cries of "baby" as she follows her back out to the car. She ignores the rest of the redhead's pleading, topping off the car and getting back in the driver's seat. When Chloe tries to use her cuteness again, Beca leans over the center console to sink her hand into red hair. She fists and uses her grip to hold Chloe still as they kiss. Again and again, deeply and hotly until she feels it burn her lungs. Chloe whimpers, hanging her hand in the crook of Beca's arm and gripping the front of her t-shirt with the other. She really does taste as good as she smells and Beca can't get enough. The fire twists through her, winding and weaving, coiling in her gut and shaking her from the inside out. She breaks away, taking a second to breathe against the redhead's lips, inhaling the whispered "I love you, Becs" before dipping to press kisses to a furiously working throat. She bites and soothes, moving her hand from titian curls down to torso, fingers mapping ribs. Just when she feels like Chloe's about two seconds away from insisting Beca join her in the passenger seat, she pulls away, giving her one last, deep kiss and a peck on the cheek. Sitting back and watching Chloe regain her composure is a different kind of torture. One that's as pleasurable as it is painful.

Chloe's blush reminds her of wine. The rosé that they drink often, a soft and sweet pink. Her lips are red and swollen and a little messy, so very obviously the product of thorough kissing. Her eyes, when they are finally uncovered, are bold blue, captivating and luminescent and piercing Beca with their intensity. Her eyes are inevitably drawn downward though, called by the rise and fall of the redhead's chest. Beca brings her hand up to wipe a bit of smudged lipstick from the side of Chloe's mouth. She leaves her thumb there, idly running it back and forth. Chloe tilts her head quickly, nipping at her thumb. Beca smiles.

"I know you're dying to find out. But I promise we're almost there, and I hope that you'll like it. If you hate it we can always do something else. No pressure," she says into the space between them, quiet like a confession in church. Chloe's eyes sparkle like the sea and she takes the hand at her face in between her own, kneading along fingers and palm.

"I love that you want to use your break to spend it with me, Beca. Whatever it is, it's perfect."

Beca wants to reply with a cheesily mumbled "you're perfect," pushed out with a little half-smile and maybe a wink, but when she opens her mouth, nothing comes out. She's got something heavy stuck in her throat. Mercifully, Chloe makes no mention of Beca's wide-mouthed pause, opting to bring the hand in hers up to receive softly whispered kisses against knuckles.

Sometimes, she really doesn't know what to do with how Chloe makes her feel.

* * *

Beca watches Chloe flit about excitedly like a sparrow in the sand, fluffy and dancing up dust clouds as she converses with random strangers in the lobby of L'Auberge. She waves when the redhead once again points her out, this time to the older couple she's talking to. Laughs at the cute wink and shy over-the-shoulder smile. She walks up to the front desk, dragging the majority of their luggage. The woman looks up and smiles as she approaches.

It's hard not to notice the quick but obvious once-over she's treated to. She plasters on a bright smile.

"Welcome to L'Auberge Del Mar, destination luxury hotel. How may I serve you today?" Beca's momentarily thrown by the quality of the woman's voice, as caramel as her skin tone. With a brief nod, Beca gives the woman the details of her reservation, glancing away to keep from accidentally catching her eyes when they zip up every now and again. A scan of the lobby reveals Chloe hugging an old woman, cane between them like a shared microphone.

"Alright, here's your keycard, Miss Mitchell," Beca's eyes dart to the woman's nametag, Kelly, says as she slides the plastic over the counter. Her hand was already resting, idly tapping, and so she doesn't move it, waiting for the woman to simply leave the card there. She's not prepared for Kelly to continue sliding her hand towards and over Beca's to cover the keycard underneath both of their hands like a shady exchange of money or drugs. Her eyebrows ascend quickly and into her hair when she gets a quick squeeze of her fingertips and a subtle biting of a bottom lip from the woman across the counter. She's unprepared and so she doesn't know what to say or how to react because honestly, she's always surprised that anyone ever finds her attractive.

She's even less ready for Chloe to press up against her back like they're about to get down and dirty on the front desk.

"Come on, baby. What's taking you so long? Don't make me **beg**." And she's not sure if she's imagining things, like how overtly sexual Chloe's words sound, or how hotly her breaths are against Beca's ear. It's a small possibility, really there's a greater chance that she's been struck by lightning indoors, but Beca considers that maybe she's actually in a coma or is in the midst of a sexy hallucination. She's waiting for the spotlights and bass-heavy music to start. She laughs weakly when Chloe digs her fingers into her hips, pulling her backwards and biting the lobe of her ear. She croaks and then promptly blushes, avoiding the eyes of the woman in front of her and clenching her hand like a gnarling of roots, fingers like tendrils curling around the keycard like a venus flytrap. It feels like a boulder and so her hand drops the minute it moves passed the edge of the table, slapping against her thigh before swaying to rest at her side. There's the ambient hum of conversation in the lobby, but between the three of them, it's awkward and silent.

"Um, I think you'll like the room, Chlo," she peeps, still firmly stuck in the redhead's grasp. In her periphery, she sees Chloe staring at Kelly. Beca shimmies her body to get her girlfriend's attention. Chloe turns her head.

"Let's go. I want you to see the **room**." She pulls Chloe away, nodding and thanking Kelly.

The entire walk is laced with an underlying tension. It's not uncomfortable, but it isn't relieving in any way. She can hear the redhead's gears working. When they reach the room, Chloe gives her a soft smile but doesn't meet her eyes for very long. Beca frowns. They enter the room quietly and Chloe goes into the bathroom. She decides to sit on the bed and wait.

Lying back, she sticks her hands up in the air and splays her fingers. Beca's busy daydreaming about the future and what their hands will look like with rings on them when her girlfriend comes back. Chloe sits down next to her and runs a hand underneath her shirt to rub along her stomach. She studies Chloe's face.

"What's up?" Chloe expels an embarrassed laugh, airy and short. She shrugs, continuing to rub. Beca knows what's bothering Chloe. Can tell from the shifting of eyebrows and the way her shoulders draw closer and she seems to pull into herself a little.

"Nothing. I was just a little jealous and being silly," she mumbles. Beca skims her fingers up Chloe's arm and to cradle a cheek.

"Your feelings aren't silly, Chlo." Chloe smiles softly.

"Thanks, sweetheart." Beca mirrors the smile, pulling her down for a chaste kiss. The redhead braces her self on her elbow, sliding the hand on her torso down the side to brace on the bed yet maintain skin contact. There's a beat where they observe each other, reading emotions and thoughts in two different shades of blue. Chloe's eyes scrunch up and she dips down to rub noses. The action evokes a giggle from her and the sound lights the redhead up.

She covers Beca's face in little kisses, tiny brushes of lips like eighth notes, traveling across her cheeks and forehead, down along a jaw and the melody moves to Beca's neck. There, the notes start to get heavy, sinking into the harmony as the kisses become deeper. The open-mouthed pressing, accompanied with nips and accented with a legato tongue soothing, draws soft sighs from her. The movements fly across her body like a song and her skin feels alive, buzzing like a separate entity and dancing to the tune that Chloe's orchestrating. Her eyes flutter open when Chloe settles against her comfortably.

"No one could ever take your place," Beca professes, tracing along the ridge of her cheek with the the backs of her fingers. Her words are hushed and spoken with a reverence that almost constricts her throat. "No one has ever made me feel the way you do," a delicate kiss to a nose that wrinkles above a watery smile. "No one has ever loved me like you do." She can tell that Chloe wants to bury her face, but settles for ducking her eyes and biting her lip.

"I love you, Chloe Beale. More than anything and anyone else." The weight of her words, spoken a thousand times but getting heavier with every passing day, causes her sentence to skip in the middle. She takes a deep inhale to calm the shuddering. Chloe blinks, and a tear, fat and warm, falls onto Beca's cheek. It rides the curve and sinks out of sight. Beca reaches up to wipe it away and bring the redhead down to connect their lips. Chloe sighs into the kiss, molding her lips around Beca's, drawing her t-shirt up and only breaking apart to remove the garment. She also takes the time to remove her own top, sitting up and biting her lip at the sight of Beca beneath her. After a quiet minute, she returns, running fingers along the swells of Beca's breasts, soft like settling snow. Each added touch collects and the pile forming begins to have a very real pressure.

"I love you, Beca. So much. I don't even think I have the words," she chuckles as her fingers travel down to swirl around a belly button and farther to the edge of Beca's shorts. "We haven't known each other for that long, but," Chloe sucks in air, blowing it out to the side and shifting her curls with it, "you don't need to take forever to know what forever looks like."

It's said calmly, almost too casually, and Chloe's occupied with mapping the skin of an abdomen that she's explored hundreds of times and so she's a second late in responding when Beca pulls her up by her cheeks and into a deep kiss.

She licks into Chloe's mouth, curling her tongue around the redhead's feverishly and breathing through her nose as much as she can. Inhaling Chloe's scent at such close range only fuels the fire, chasing and burning her as she sinks her hands into titian curls with a painful desperation. Every breath just furthers the stuttering of her heart and it lurches against her rib cage with a fervor that seems intent on pushing it through her chest. Thankfully, Chloe's as wrapped up in emotions as she is, whimpering to match Beca's gasps, eyes closed and brow furrowed.

Without separating, Chloe removes both of their bras, throwing them haphazardly before driving Beca farther up the bed by pushing into the kiss. She scrambles backward on her elbows as Chloe stalks above her and matches her move for move. She stops once she reaches the pillows, but the redhead continues, nudging her until she's sitting up against it and Chloe straddles her lap. She hooks Beca's neck, using the other hand to cradle her cheek and control the kiss. Beca groans, squeezing strong thighs before they break apart to breathe fully. The heat inside of her explodes in a flash.

Chloe's eyes are twinkling knowingly, making absolutely no sound but somehow looking loudly. Her lips are red and full, bottom lip disappearing at the corner to be teased between teeth always eager to bite Beca when they get the chance. Her long neck is dotted with little marks, a gradient from rouge to purple. Red curls frame her face like a fiery glow and she has to rest her head against the headboard. She opens her mouth to tell Chloe how beautiful she is. That's not quite what comes out, though.

"We should have taken our pants off first."

Chloe's eyebrows go up, obviously surprised, and Beca feels her own face changing in a similar fashion. Before she can correct herself, the redhead tosses her head back to laugh loudly before pressing their foreheads together, surrounding Beca with light giggling.

"I feel so romanced right now, Bec." Beca wrinkles her nose.

"Yeah, um. That's not what I meant to say." Chloe just nods along like she's humoring Beca. She doesn't add anything else though, instead deciding to reach down between them to unbutton Beca's shorts, biting her lip like she's excited, occasionally huffing a disbelieving laugh and looking up through her lashes. It squeezes her chest, taking the air out of her lungs because she finds Chloe almost unbearably cute in this moment.

And there's something about the cuteness that makes this woman sexier.

Beca blinks slowly, watching with dazed eyes as Chloe shimmies her shorts down, taking them away with a smirk and pausing to raise Beca's calf to her mouth, leisurely licking and biting, winking when Beca's leg muscles tense. With a quick peck, she moves to take off her own bottoms. A gruff command keeps Beca from going to help. She rolls her eyes and smiles at Chloe.

She'd meant to welcome Chloe back with a little snark or something so very 'Beca', but everything about this woman seems to rip out the circuits inside of her brain. With no way for the signals to travel from her mind to the rest of her body, she simply stares dumbly as the redhead slinks back towards her. The way she moves reminds Beca of the way honey looks when it's drizzled, slow and smooth. Pouring and pooling, dripping off the edges. Her mouth feels sandy from gaping.

She maintains her frozen position, feeling and probably looking like a teenager that's brand new to this even as Chloe is sliding back onto her lap. Her arms are up, hovering around Chloe like they're playing basketball and she's trying to keep the redhead from passing. It isn't until her girlfriend is brushing her own hair back behind an ear tinged with pink that she snaps back to reality, because whatever is filling Beca with these overwhelming feelings is in Chloe too, and the woman honestly seems to be feeling something close to nervousness. They look at each other, Beca leaning against the headboard and Chloe down into her eyes, hands lightly scratching at the nape of Beca's neck. The way that Chloe smiles is like sunlight.

The way that Chloe loves her is like the sun.

Full and bright, always there even if she thinks that she can't see it. Burning, always burning, always hot. Chloe's love greets her like every waking sunrise, winking and filling her life and her days with warmth. On every cloudy day, on every rainy day. She's always there behind it all, a constant in a world of changing variables.

Her throat has trouble working around the lump that's settled and her eyes prickle. She can feel wetness building in them as she looks up at Chloe.

Chloe, who's comfortably sitting and in no hurry to do anything different. Who thinks that every mundane thing with Beca is special. Chloe, who's calmly running her fingers with their red nails through her hair and letting Beca go through what she's feeling with no pressure whatsoever. It isn't until she takes a breath that feels so heavy it actually hurts that Chloe does anything.

With a tenderness that only inflames the pain, she leans in to lightly touch her lips to Beca's. Cradles the back of her head with a gentle palm as she requests entrance into Beca's mouth, tongue careful yet sure. Beca feels the inverse of such softness squeezing her heart, trampling her lungs and her breath hitches violently, high and hard. When she feels the redhead beginning to pull back, to ask if she's okay, Beca shakes her head as those tears that were filling her now closed eyes spill forth. She winds her fingers into Chloe's hair to keep them connected, gasping into the redhead's mouth. Chloe nods and brings her hands down to the small of her back and the ridge of her hip, pulling and squeezing.

There's something about the careful way that Chloe's loving her right now that snaps at the guarded creature inside of her chest. Goads it into roaring, because the very real and very recent struggle with her mental condition doesn't want so much softness. She wants Chloe to attack her with the same kind of desperation that Beca herself feels tearing at her, constantly looming over her shoulder like a spectre. She wants that fervent rush of a desire that flares so hot that movements become mindless.

 _She can't stop. She's surely lost her mind and is operating solely off of physical instincts. That's the only way she can explain this. Chloe whimpers beneath her, cheek and neck flushed, hair spilling over one shoulder as she buries her face down into the pillow. Fingers bury into copper curls, trying to direct noise into the movement of hands instead. Beca groans as she watches Chloe's whole body shift with the force of the thrust._

 _She doesn't remember exactly how they got here, only that they were watching tv, discussing sexual kinks and cajoling over breakfast. She doesn't remember exactly what was said. The only thing she can recall with any clarity is how aware she was of the way Chloe's eyes changed when they were talking about strap-ons._

 _Beca can feel the bruise on her calf throbbing, gifted to her courtesy of the coffee table as they rushed from Chloe's couch into her room. It stings with every dig of her foot into the sheets, bracing her knees as she leans forward to curl her arm around the redhead's torso to anchor herself. Each pull draws a sigh and each push, a broken cry. Every frantic call of Beca's name stokes the flames inside her chest, hot and vast like the skyline of a burning city._

 _She leans down, placing a wet open-mouthed kiss on Chloe's back. The redhead moans, backing into her to follow when she recedes. They move together, crashing with perfect rhythm. Beca runs a palm over the curve of Chloe's ass, traveling from the bottom up to one of the dimples that sits at her lower back in a symmetrical pair. "You're so wet, Chlo." The redhead chuckles, a barely-managed airy affair._

 _"Well, whose fault is that?" Beca beams._

 _And really, she thinks some muscle might be getting ready to cramp because they've been doing this literally all day. The orange juice on the table was probably tepid and disgusting, but when someone as irresistible as Chloe tells you that they have sex toys, you don't just continue with your day normally._

 _No, you do what Beca has done. You hop into bed as quickly as possible. The setting sun is shooting rays directly into her eyes and she turns her face away. Chloe's thrusts are becoming erratic, her breathing inconsistent. Beca squeezes her backside and pulls out a little farther before burying deep._

 _"Oh God, Be-" Chloe's words cut off in another high cry, burying the sentence in wet pleas and Beca's mind blanks out at a pace that matches the redhead's increased whimpering. Straigtening up, she watches the phallus sliding in an out and she moans at the sight of Chloe's thighs, glistening without the help of lube. It had long since worn away, sometime during their second or third round._

 _"I'm so close," Chloe whispers quickly, pushing the words about before they're lost under another grunt. Beca nods even though the redhead can't see and sets a punishing pace, ignoring the burning in her entire lower torso. She wants to laugh, because this is legitimately painful, but she's also being driven by this other burning, an insatiable need to make Chloe come undone again. With a final thrust that pushes the headboard loudly against the wall, she feels Chloe shuddering underneath her, tensing and gasping. She watches Chloe stretch and tighten, moving back into her and burying her face as the orgasm rolls through her. Her own breath catches, sitting in her lungs, in awe. As Beca slowly slides in and out, she presses soft kisses along Chloe's back, licking and breathing her in. When the redhead finally slumps into the mattress like a solid heap with no structure, face completely covered by titian locks that subtly shift with every puffed breath, Beca removes the harness and lies down beside her. She brushes some hair away to find a brightly smiling Chloe, teeth gleaming and one clear ocean eye shining through the fire of her hair at her. Beca grins back._

 _"Wanna go again?" Chloe's tinkling laughter lights up the whole room._

That memory flashes through her mind now and with it comes the need to move over Chloe. Beca slides her own arms around Chloe's lower back, picking her up and rocking forward to lie over her. They had broken the kiss at the end of the transition, but Beca returns, hooking the redhead's thigh over her hip and shifting against Chloe. She releases Chloe's leg when it wraps around her tightly.

Chloe's hands paw at her mindlessly, sliding from sides to back, from hair to collarbones. Beca skims her fingers around to tease Chloe from behind, shifting her panties at the same time that she ducks her head to bathe a stiff peak with a warm tongue. The redhead pushes against her fingers and grabs Beca's head to keep her there, breath whistling out of her in a quick rush.

"Baby..." Beca hums when Chloe doesn't continue, but it seems like the redhead may not have been aware that she'd spoken. Still, Beca heeds the summon and brings her fingers around to the front, dipping down and spreading the wetness along a hard nub. Chloe jerks and cries out, head pushing back into the sheets. Beca switches to the other breast, leaving a small love bite on the underside before flattening her tongue against the bud. Chloe's hips shift, searching out more relief and Beca obliges, swirling around her opening before plunging in with two fingers.

The immediate stretch tears a heated moan from Chloe, back arching and eyes rolling back. Her eyelids flutter like she's having trouble figuring out whether to keep her eyes open or shut them. The beast inside of her roars louder, screams at her to take Chloe and to do it roughly. Her thrusting pulls whimpers from the redhead and Beca feels feverish with how hot the air around her seems to be. The air must actually be fire. She gasps.

She honestly thinks she might be sick, slipping into some sort of delirium as she curls her fingers inside of Chloe, twisting and sliding through slick heat as she kisses down her stomach, biting just at the edge of it being too much. Chloe moans from high in her throat, writhing beneath her ministrations like a pagan dance. Beca runs her nose through soft curls, licking first tentatively and then with an abrasive tinge. She hears the responding cry like a call to the primordial Eros. She feels like the embodiment of desire right now.

Electric, the static arcs out of her, shooting miniature lightning bolts everywhere that she's touching Chloe. It zips and crackles, biting and burning lines as they travel. Beca is out of her mind, but somehow she's able to marvel at how much she **wants** Chloe.

All of the time, appropriate place or not. Whenever the redhead smiles at her, whenever she frowns and whenever she laughs. She wants Chloe in every way.

As a friend, as a lover, as forever.

Maybe not as enemies, but the fights are fun too because they always manage to make up and it only makes the lovemaking better.

Hearing the keening cries of the gorgeous redhead climaxing beneath her, Beca is overcome with how intensely she wants to **marry** Chloe. And so, as the redhead comes down from her high, chest rising and falling deeply like rolling waves in an angry ocean, she's sure that her face reflects some of that amazement. Chloe covers her face.

"That was really quick," she mutters. It's muffled by her hands. Beca admires her nails before pulling Chloe's hands down, pressing her lips to one before tucking it underneath her chin, fingers laced. Chloe looks off to the side as her cheeks cool.

"I'm pretty sure that it's more of a compliment for me, instead of something to be embarrassed about, baby." Chloe puffs a small, breathless sound of humor, rolling her head back to look at Beca. The redhead purses her lips as she studies her.

"Yeah... You were pretty... insistent there, darling." And now Beca blushes a little. She shrugs.

"When you've got a girlfriend as sexy as mine, sometimes you get a little crazy." Chloe's lips pull up, just a small curving before emotion tilts it into a full-blown smile. She laughs, covering her eyes with her hand before splitting her fingers to peek at Beca.

"You're unbelievable sometimes, Becs." She winks at Chloe.

"Unbelievably good."

Beca feels unbelievably offended when Chloe flips their positions to tickle her until she cries.


	14. 1 Year 4 Months - 6 Months

***** AUTHOR'S NOTE *****

 **If you read the following chapters beyond this one and quit at ANY point other than the absolute end, you'll probably ruin it for yourself.**

 **Thank you for reading.**

* * *

Beca presses Chloe's back a little more into the shower wall, chuckling lowly when she squeals at the coolness of the tiles. She kisses a slow line from the redhead's shoulder up to her ear. Chloe's pulse flutters against her lips, soft and rapid like a hummingbird's wings. Her hands roam with a blind hunger, over hips and waist, over arms and chest, up and down until she turns Chloe around to put them back-to-front. She exhales as she slides a hand down the redhead's abdomen. Through the mess of tangled red in front of her, she can see Chloe's eyes are hooded. The sliver of blue watches her from the corner.

"Bec." Chloe's fist rests by her face on the tile, gripping into itself tightly as she strokes along slick heat. Beca hums, kissing her cheek. She laces their fingers together, giving Chloe something to hold on to as she enters her lover. Beca echoes the redhead's moan, running her tongue up the back of a neck wet from the shower and sweat.

Chloe murmurs, pushing her backside into Beca before moving forward into her fingers. A low moan rumbles in the redhead's chest, ending with a gasp as her body twists. She can feel Chloe tensing up. Can feel her movements and breathing getting erratic and desperate. Cheek-to-cheek, Beca studies their interwoven fingers.

Chloe's hand is slightly larger, her skin a tanner shade. Their nails are the same color. Chloe wanted to match. Beca's always liked the way the redhead looks in black.

She also wonders what Chloe's hand would look like with a ring on it.

* * *

"I mean, just imagine what it would be like if we had a baby goat, Becs."

"No. Definitely not." A hand smacks the open skin of her thigh. "Hey!"

Chloe's pout is like a ridiculous wildfire. She can feel it burning into her chest. She watches the redhead lean back against the wooden pool lounger, digging a finger into the slats of the chair. Her red hair catches the sunlight in a way that makes her want to blink. Her wide sunglasses hide bright blues.

At least she gets to stare at everything not covered by the white bikini. Chloe's body is a weaving terrain, dipping valleys and rolling peaks of smooth skin. Skin that tastes like every sweet forbidden thing Beca was ever denied. She remembers licking syrup off of Chloe's belly earlier this morning. She remembers the way it pooled in her navel, the same way the redhead's whimpering cry pooled low in Beca's gut as she cleaned it off. Snapping fingers disturb her view of Chloe's torso. She slowly brings her eyes back up to see an amused smirk. Sees all of the signs of a secret in those lips and the way they know exactly what she's thinking.

"You okay there, Mitchell? You're drooling a little." She knows she isn't drooling. But she doesn't feel okay.

Her heart feels a little too full these days. She feels like she needs to find a place to pour out her emotions, which is why she's been burying herself in Chloe. She's been putting every piece of herself into Chloe's hands, wordlessly and sometimes verbally begging. The redhead has been more than eager to accept and reciprocate.

She either needs to pour it out, or make a larger space. Something as infinite as these feelings seem to be. Beca bites the inside of her bottom lip and the fog clears just in time for her to see the tail end of the redhead's lips moving. She totally missed the question. "What did you say?"

Chloe laughs. It always sounds so much like music. She hears a tinkling of notes, dreamy and inspiring. Beca files it away for later.

"What about a dog? A little fluffy thing or maybe a big handsome boy!" The redhead's words wind up until she's almost squeaking at the end. Beca can't help the uptwist of her lips.

"We can think about it. I'm not so against..." But she stops talking, because Chloe's smile is so large, her elation so vivid, that Beca swears she can see eyes shielded by sharply glinting sunglasses. She can feel that piercing gaze on her and the burning in her chest expands before settling into a warm flame. She imagines getting a dog.

Teaching it to go outside and to do tricks. Getting it all of the ridiculous things Chloe would insist that their pet would need. She can already hear the exact tone of voice. Whining and authoritative all at once. She wonders what it would be like to grow as a couple alongside a furbaby. She wonders if they'll get another.

She wonders what Chloe's ring size is.

* * *

She can't help it, she can't help it, she can't-

Beca groans loudly at the hands rubbing down her back. She tenses as she anticipates the teasing that's coming. She's never been disappointed.

"That good, huh, Beca. Should I be concerned?" Beca growls through the rest of Chloe's teasing. Even the damn masseuse chuckles.

"Shut it, Beale. This is a professional at work," she throws out over Chloe's "maybe I should leave the room?" She can feel the redhead's hand, swinging to reach her. Beca moves her hand away.

"Booo, don't be a grumpy pants, babe. It's okay to have special feelings. This is a safe place. You can talk to us." Beca doesn't need to look to know that Chloe is smiling. She can hear it in the words, winding around like a golden thread and making them brighter.

She can feel Chloe's influence on the entirety of the room, lighting everything up, bathing it all in a warm glow. Chloe makes everyone comfortable with her open acceptance and easy-going personality. **_Sometimes_** , she jokes, thinking about the times when Chloe is a dictator. **_Too many veggies._**

"I'll give you some special feelings," she says not at all grumpily. Hands press into her lower back and Beca works through this groan with deep breathing. But Chloe probably senses it from some vague difference in air pressure. The redhead's left hand swings out again, and this time it catches her own on the table before she realizes.

She thinks once more about how this hand would feel with a couple of bands on it.

* * *

Beca digs her heels into the sheets beneath her, trying to tear a hole into the pillow above her head. Chloe sighs against her burning skin. It feels like a winter gust and she reflexively tenses. The kiss she places on her clavicle, light as a feather yet as heavy as a hammer, makes her gasp. Those lips travel slowly to the hollow of her throat before a wet tongue tracks a brazen path up to her ear.

"I really like your piercings." Chloe hasn't asked a question, but Beca's nodding anyways. Teeth catch the ring at her lobe and she whimpers at the slight tug. She's trying to push out something snarky, but it doesn't work. All that comes out is another gasp, squeezed out of a throat that is having trouble. Her heart seems to be stuck in it.

Chloe's hands skim and scrape along her skin, sending shivers down her spine like a wet electricity. They leave goosebumps in their wake and Beca isn't sure if she feels hot or cold. She arches up as the the redhead scratches up her spine at the same time that nimble fingers tease at her breast, circling a stiff peak.

"I uh, I really..." She doesn't remember what she wanted to say. Chloe's teeth catch her jaw.

"You what, baby?" She grunts when Chloe pinches.

"I-I... really - uh - Chlo..." Chloe giggles.

"You really me?" The redhead sits up, running her hands along Beca's torso like honey, slow and sweet. Chloe winks and pokes her tongue between her teeth. "I really you, too." Before she can bite out a retort, Chloe returns her attention to the brunette's body, bending down and licking a path from navel up to the underside of her breast. She leaves a quick peck before sucking and biting. Beca can hear her quietly mutter, "I really, **really** , you."

Chloe works her over like she's being graded on this performance. Beca's a mess.

One big, quivering, sweating, swearing mess, writhing around on the sheets and she isn't sure if she's shaking from exhaustion or desire. Their eyes connect over the expanse of Beca's body as Chloe licks lightly through her folds, flicking her tongue up at the end and Beca jerks at the motion. She grits her teeth and pushes her head back, shutting her eyes as the cool air of the redhead's quiet laughter hits her sensitive skin. The anticipation has her whole body tingling like it's all one live wire, thrumming with excited energy and vibrating to the tune of Chloe's ministrations. She's trying to hold onto her sanity as the redhead takes her sweet time, skirting around and over and under but never actually **getting** there.

"Are you actually going to make me ask, Chloe?" It's as annoyed as she can sound right this minute. Which isn't really all that much, considering her ability to focus isn't enough to cover a pinhead. Her voice does shake a little though, sounding more jumbled and desperate than anything. She hears a distracted hum before Chloe presses her lips on the inside of her thigh.

"You never have to ask, Becs." Beca's getting ready to **demand** that Chloe stop teasing her, because she's about to explode, probably literally, but the redhead continues speaking. "But I love to hear you beg."

The air stills in the room. It's just for a second. One infinite, scorching second, where Beca knows her gaze is as hot as Chloe's is. The redhead stares back unblinkingly, eyebrow cocked as she sits right over where Beca needs her to be.

She could take the challenge. She could fight it. She could pretend that she's not burning up under Chloe's hands like she's made of straw and Chloe's the goddess Sol, moving with a body made of fire. She could do a lot of things, just to be stubborn. But she wants Chloe closer than is possible.

She wants **everything**.

"Please, baby," she breathes, biting her lip at the way Chloe's eyes pin her down in response. "I need you."

Chloe wastes no time, and the room fills with the blended harmony of their shared pleasure.

Afterwards, as she stretches, she watches Chloe approach with two water bottles.

"We didn't leave the room today," she comments as the redhead hands her one.

"We went out on the balcony." Beca watches the way her throat works as she swallows. Her mind flashes to earlier, recounting other times that same throat moved. The way it tensed as Beca bit it and the way the redhead's pulse raced against her lips.

"That really doesn't count. It's part of the room." Chloe giggles.

"Would you really have preferred to have done something else?" Beca rolls her eyes at that.

"Definitely **not**. I was just pointing it out." She places her water bottle on the nightstand, lying back down. Chloe picks the duvet up off of the floor and shakes it out over them. It lands with a pleasant coolness. As they snuggle closer together, both still stark naked, Beca grimaces at the feeling of the bed beneath her.

"What's with that face?"

"The sheets are really moist."

Chloe's loud laugh rings clear and clean, and Beca hears that tinkling of notes again, developing a little more.

She studies Chloe as her lover's humor drifts off and is replaced with a calm joy. Lying like this, nose-to-nose, the blue of her eyes almost seems to glow. Beca giggles and wrinkles her nose when Chloe tilts her chin up and licks it. She tries to deadpan but her cheeks just won't comply. She ends up turning away, heart singing when the redhead follows the movement and slots herself in behind, arms winding around and making sure they're snug. Beca snorts at the very obvious and unnecessary pawing, turning her head and staring from the corner of her eye at the slightly blurry lecher at her back. Chloe licks her cheek this time.

"You're so weird, Chlo." The redhead visibly brightens.

"Thanks!"

As they relax, Beca thinks about how nice it'd be to fall asleep like this every night for forever.

* * *

"Is it possible to be in the sun too much?" Chloe scoffs imperiously.

"Of course not, Beca. Don't be absurd." Beca muses that Chloe is probably 70% sunlight. She's the healthiest person Beca knows. The rest of that percentage is dedicated to rainbows, healthy food, and music. The redhead stretches out on the chaise lounge, running her hand through her hair. It parts like a fiery waterfall, cascading around her hand and spilling over her shoulder. Beca watches the muscles of the redhead's arm flex with the movement of stroking through her locks. Her mouth opens of its own accord.

"You know what's absurd?" Chloe turns to look at her. "How pretty you are." She's immediately graced with a wide, white smile.

"You're so cute, Becs." She just smirks.

"I can do some uncute things," she winks, pleased when that draws a laugh out. Chloe's humming through her smile.

"Mmm, I don't know, sweetheart. Everything about you is so precious," the redhead coos around pursed lips. Beca furrows her brow and pouts and it really just makes Chloe coo harder. Before she can verbally protest, someone approaches.

"Hey there. Um, excuse me," a tall man stands next to Chloe, and she has to crane her neck up to see him properly. He shakes his head like he's flipping his brown hair out of his face, only it's too short to even brush his cheeks. Beca scowls and glares beneath her aviators. She scratches her scalp around her messy bun. "I saw you from over there." He points over his shoulder at a shaded table with a couple of other guys watching.

"Hm? Oh, okay. Hi!" Chloe greets amicably. Beca wishes she wasn't so nice. Even if it **is** something she loves about the redhead.

"Yeah, and, I couldn't help but come over and say hi. You're gorgeous and," and that's **her** line, "I was wondering, if you wanted to," **_no, she won't_** , "maybe we could do something later?" Beca's just about to spit out something about a lobotomy that he could treat himself to alone, that she'd gladly pick up the tab for, but Chloe speaks first.

"Thanks! I'm flattered, but I have to decline." Chloe's smiling that 'I'm not actually sad but I'm pretending for your benefit' smile, and it makes Beca reflexively smirk. The guy seems pretty bummed.

"Aw. Is there any way I could change your mind?" Chloe shakes her head, pouting just slightly. Beca wants to bite it.

"Nope! I have a girlfriend, and she's totes hot. The hottest. Seriously the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. We're very happy." She feels her jaw drop as a blush starts. He scuffs the concrete with his boat shoe.

"Darn. Well, it never hurts to try. Is this your girlfriend?" He tilts his head towards her and the redhead beams.

"Yep! This is that most beautiful one."

They chat for a bit before he inevitably leaves, but she isn't paying much attention. Her mind is caught up in a myriad of subjects. Possibilities and desires, the way Chloe's hair shifts just the slightest with the passing breeze and how gracefully she pushes back the strand that blows onto her face. The cost of a lobotomy and whether that happens anymore.

Beca imagines what it'd be like if her title was something different.

Something a little more permanent.

* * *

"I like bubbles." Beca snorts.

"I know, Chloe." She really knows. Beca's never had a collection of bath bubbles and bombs before. All the crunchy, expensive stuff made from real vanilla and everything good for your skin. The redhead swipes her arms over the surface of the water, raking the bubbles into a large pile in front of Beca. The arms surrounding her then bring them even closer, piling the light pink bubbles up her chest.

"What are you doing?" Chloe hums innocently, playing at a game that Beca _knows_ Chloe knows fools no one. Her hum is too casual, too high and too short. It's just trying to buy time. The mountain is getting larger, drawing closer, and Beca has to angle her head upwards to avoid it touching her face. The redhead chuckles against her ear as she continues.

"I like this tub. We should get one." Beca wants to nod, because she's already planning for it when they officially move in together, but she can't without putting her face in the suds.

"Seriously, woman," is gritted out. At this point, too much movement of her jaw is going to bring them into contact. Beca squeezes Chloe's thighs under the water. The redhead giggles.

Finally, Beca gets fed up and just wipes the bubbles away from below, like Jaws trying to capsize a boat. She ignores Chloe's protests, taking some bubbles and tossing them over her shoulder directly into the redhead's face. She laughs at the shocked sputter.

"Oh! You little brat!" She barks another laugh.

"You basically cram bubbles into my nose, and **I'm** the brat?" There's plenty of room in this tub for them to comfortably fight, but Beca's happy where she is, so she settles once more against Chloe's chest, lacing their fingers and kissing the knuckles of the redhead's hands. Chloe rocks them side to side.

"This has been an amazing week. I wish we could stay like this all of the time," Chloe murmurs into her shoulder, pressing a small kiss to the base of her neck. Beca gives her more room to work, resting her head on the redhead's opposite shoulder.

"Sure you won't get bored of me?" Chloe nods into her skin, appreciatively kissing up and inhaling along her jaw.

"Yeah. I'd never get bored of you." Her heart hurts.

It's been hurting this entire week. This entire year. Her heart has been hurting since she met Chloe. It's been beating faster and not at all, throbbing and jerking and melting. It's been fighting to escape her chest and find its home in Chloe's hands. She thought she knew who she was, but she's become so much better since she met Chloe. She's been exercising. She's been eating **vegetables** with a sense of regularity. She called her **dad** occasionally. He actually sounded like he was crying the first time he picked up the phone.

"Maybe I should schedule more of these vacations, huh." She's not really asking so much as thinking aloud. Chloe makes a noise of affirmation as her hands slip free of Beca's and start to wander. She sighs and shuts her eyes when lithe fingers dance along her thighs.

"I think that'd be a great idea, Bec."

"I think **you're** a great idea," she mutters without any real intent. Chloe shakes Beca with her amusement, kissing her shoulder again and burying her laughter in it as her hand teases through the brunette.

"You've always got something to say."

She wants to ask Chloe to marry her.

* * *

Beca almost trips on nothing. She might have dropped the bag of bagels.

She could even be standing with hot coffee dripping on her right now and she wouldn't know. Because how did she get so lucky as to end up with a woman like Chloe Beale? Beca gapes.

Chloe's lying on the floor in front of the balcony doors, naked as the day she was born, reading a book. She's stretched out comfortably, lounging like a sleepy lionness, purring contentedly and turning pages and Beca feels her heart race. She feels like she's caught in a romantic movie and this is one of those moments where the main character really _sees_ their love interest. The lines of the doors and the subtle change in lighting from a thin cloud paint Chloe's skin in stripes and shades, and Beca's eyes are drawn in the mapping of the differences.

She just stands there, staring in awe and eventually Chloe realizes that she's returned. With a casual wink, Chloe gets up and stretches. The redhead drops the book on the bed and glides over to her. She drapes her arms over Beca's shoulders and presses a big fat kiss to her cheek, ending with an audible smack. Beca blinks, two, three, maybe twelve times, all in the span of a couple of seconds.

"Hey there, beautiful. You okay?" Chloe brushes through the brunette's hair as she asks, watching her with a relaxed demeanor. Beca, on the other hand, feels throttled by the kind of unquenchable thirst that's driven her to maul Chloe as often as she can. She feels possessed or sick or like she's dying. She feels crazy, like everything is building up with no end in sight.

She really wants to marry this woman.

* * *

Chloe's singing along with everything on the radio, bouncing her head and tapping her fingers against the wheel. She's been trying to get Beca to join in by pointedly singing certain parts **at** her. Beca smiles widely and watches with her head against the window.

The opening chords of Bebe Rexha's 'Meant To Be' come on, and Chloe squeals excitedly, turning it up. She quickly raises her sunglasses, giving Beca a firm, short stare before looking back to the road. Beca really loves Chloe's country accent.

" _Baby, lay on back and relax, kick your pretty feet up on my dash,_ " Beca laughs and moves to do that when the redhead taps her knee. She can't stop giggling at the exaggerated accent. It doesn't diminish the pull in her lower belly, but she figures that not much can right now. Chloe's enthusiasm is infectious and she finds herself being compelled to pick up Bebe's part of the lyrics. Chloe's grin gets impossibly wider, and they thread their fingers together.

" _'Cause I'm tired of the fake love, show me what you're made of,_ " she hears Chloe's giggle over the music, " _Boy, make me believe,_ " and she knows the redhead's chomping at the bit to sing this next part.

" _Whoa, hold up, girl, don't you know you're beautiful?_ " Beca rolls her eyes and bats at Chloe's held up hand signalling for her to stop, like the redhead's a traffic guard, but she's still blushing. They continue bouncing the lyrics back and forth, laughing like new lovers and holding hands like they never wanted to let go.

Beca intends to make sure they never have to.

* * *

And so it went, with the train of Beca's thoughts set very firmly on finding the right ring and the right time.

It had gotten to the point that Chloe had asked Beca to pass the toothpaste and she almost responded with a, "only if you marry me." She rests her head on the soundboard. The sound of a body dropping heavily into the chair next to her brings her out of her daydreaming about Chloe. The chair rolls a bit with the movement.

Emily huffs, hands splayed on her knees as she rocks back in the rolling chair. She takes a deep breath and stares at Beca.

"Six." Her eyebrow rises.

"How did you find out?" Emily seems flustered. She waves her arms around a bit manically, like there are very tenacious gnats in the air around her.

"I held her hands." The flapping increases when the other eyebrow moves up.

"You didn't tell me how I was supposed to do it! I just, I freaked out because she was getting suspicious and-" Beca snorts.

"Chloe holds hands with everyone, Em. I wouldn't worry." Emily shakes her head.

"I had to- you don't- I was massaging her fingers and stuff and- and- **don't look at me like that** , **Beca**!" She kind of wants to laugh, because the expression on Emily's face is hilarious. She looks like she's worried Beca might punch her. "Whatever! Chloe was asking me if I was okay and she was doing that thing, where her eyes were stabbing into my soul and-" Beca claps her hand onto Emily's shoulder.

"Bambi. Breathe. It's fine. Cool. Groovy, even. Thanks for taking one for the team." The young brunette pouts.

"She wouldn't let me to that string thing, where you measure with it. She might know. I'm sorry, Becs." Beca shrugs.

"Chloe knows everything. She knows things that I plan before **I** know. It doesn't matter." Her brow furrows. "As long as she doesn't say no, I guess."

"She isn't going to say no, Beca." She swings around in the chair to argue, but Emily just gives her a dry stare. They get into a weird staring contest and Emily's eyes are extra wide, twitching at the corners. Beca's feel sandy. After a minute of that, Beca scoots away to fiddle with the guitar in the corner, Emily trailing after. She plays that tinkling little song that's been bugging her, adding to it and digging through her mind for a suitable beat. She wants to keep the dreamy vibe. Emily's swaying her head to the music.

"This is good. What is it?" Beca rubs her nose.

"Just something that's been in my head. I have no idea what it is yet, but it won't leave me alone."

They play around for a while before getting down to some serious work. She bops along to the R&B track, cleaning up and looking for the things that will make the song **just** right. She's in the process of adding that when the door to the studio opens again. Beca doesn't turn around, expecting it to be Buddy. She really should have known from the way the air leaves the room.

Arms wrap around her before she's shrouded in a lion's mane. Reflexively, she inhales the vanilla and citrus that she's come to associate with the redhead. It seems to be an inherent trait because Chloe always smells this way, even first thing in the morning. Chloe hums into her hair.

"Mmm. I missed you." The redhead drags Emily closer by hooking the toe of her boot into the wheels. The young brunette squeaks, and Chloe turns. "Are you sure you're okay, Em?" Beca hides her smirk at how concerned Chloe sounds. Emily laughs haltingly, like she isn't sure herself.

"Uh, erm, eheh, ye-yeah! Peachy keen! Fine and dandy!" Beca finally has to give in to a laugh when Emily's on her fifth rendition of "I'm okay".

"You sound the opposite of 'okay', dude. Maybe let's just relax?"

Chloe's busy feeling Emily's forehead, searching for a fever or some other sign of impending doom, and so she completely misses the way that Beca stares at her.

 ** _Six._**

* * *

"What do you have in mind, Becs?" She shrugs.

"I don't know. Something that seems right for Chloe," she supplies, which really doesn't supply much at all. "What did Aubrey say?"

"She said that Chloe would marry you if you gave her a tied cherry stem." Something in Beca's chest lifts at the thought that Chloe would be that excited. Which is a detail that she knows if she thinks logically, but her mind is a twisted mass of information highways, clogged with all of the emotions that can no longer fit in her heart.

"That is absolutely no help." The only person who would be able to tell her with certainty what Chloe likes is Chloe herself, and Beca is not about to do that. Though the redhead knows that she has no intention of going anywhere, Beca hasn't given any hints on when **exactly** she'd be dropping down on one knee. She sighs as they enter a jewelry store.

"Hello! How may I help you?" A salesman smiles at them from behind a counter. Her eyes drift as Jesse makes light conversation. "So, is this for this lovely woman here?" Beca's face twists into a grimace before she snorts loudly.

"Oh God, no," she answers, shaking her head and taking a step away from Jesse. He only looks mildly offended before they both share a laugh. "I'm uh, I'm looking for a ring. For," she blows out a breath, feeling nervous again, "my girlfriend." Her mouth curves down. That title just didn't feel like enough these days. The man nods, leading them down a couple of cabinets to look at some rings. None of them have the kind of spark that she thinks Chloe would like. She's sure that her face says as much, as they stroll along the cabinets.

"So, she's the one, huh." Beca looks up, mouth parted the slightest with surprise at Jesse's pensive tone. He's studying the rings though, and so he doesn't catch her expression. She nods, stroking across the glass surface. It's another thing that's missed.

In his soft smile, Beca sees her best friend of twenty years. She sees the awkward and earnest eight-year-old, screaming at her in his halting stutter that she was crazy for hating movies. The mop of unruly hair that his mom cut with a bowl. She sees the gangly teenager on her couch, picking up their first guitars. His hair was lengthier then, always getting in his eyes before it was long enough to tie back. She remembers the way he'd confessed to having a crush on her. His hands were so sweaty.

Being with Jesse had been fun. It was easy, but it was always just off-center, just shy of being right. Beca remembers her own confessions and the way he'd cried. At first in anger, and then in acceptance. They'd both cried. That summer without him was lonely.

They've grown so much together. She can't imagine being here with anyone else.

"You're a great guy, Jesse." His eyes hold a question in them. But he knows her from when she couldn't get her feelings out. Knows her from when she was obtuse and closed-off. He knows her from the days when she was dealing with her parents splitting up. And so she knows that her words aren't needed. A smirk is enough.

A punch to the shoulder, a rolling of eyes with the barest hint of an exasperated huff. A quick comment about Aubrey having to put up with his unhealthy obsession with movies, and he gets it. He gets it, because he's always gotten her.

She still pretends to be annoyed when he wraps her up in a bear hug, though.

* * *

"Is this the right one?" Beca nods. This just seemed right. Jesse whistles, eyebrows raised as the man behind the counter writes down her instructions. Beca hands the ring over to her best friend.

It wasn't unnecessarily detailed. The white gold band was twisted, like two vines wrapping together before merging into a solid band midway down. One of the vines was adorned with small diamonds on either side. The centerpiece was a round cut diamond in a halo setting that made it look more squarish. It all felt very 'Chloe'. Beca surveys the small shop they're in.

Sheer curtains bracket the window and odds and ends take up the shelf that spans the length. The pink-orange light that filters through paints the whole space with a hazy array of sepia tones. The shelves and cabinets have everything from a fabric toy horse, mane frizzy and eyes manic, to what seems to be a miniature gold treasure chest, authenticity to be verified. The shop smells like it looks. Kind of dusty, kind of exciting.

This little store was a random choice, a selection made in desperation at the end of the day. She'd been set on giving up for today, tired and grumpy and honestly she was kind of ready to be done looking at rings. But Jesse had encouraged her to keep searching, just another hour.

"What if this ring belonged to some duchess and her soul is still attached to it?" Apparently the long day has gotten to him, too.

"What movie is that from?" He holds his hand up, asking her to hear him out because surely this thought has some merit.

"What if, when Chloe puts it on, her body is taken over by the ghost of past royalty and you spend the rest of your life catering to a cranky old woman that demands her hair is always in an updo?" He honestly smiles, enthused and for a minute she isn't sure if he's serious or not. Beca presses her lips together, rolling them back and forth as she tries to freeze some semblance of a smile there. Her eyebrows are a lost cause, though. They've decided to join her hairline, far too convinced that Jesse has lost it.

"That's... that's a good try, Jess. Maybe let's finish today up and you can go take a nap. I don't want Aubrey to flay me for uh..." She trails off as her concern turns into an insult to her friend's sanity. He laughs along anyways, like he heard the comment and it's somehow endearing.

They walk around inside for a bit longer before going down the street to grab a bite. Her phone rings as she's cheering Jesse on. He's trying bravely to eat an entire slice of pizza in one mouthful. When she lets it go to voicemail, he makes a questioning noise.

"It's um- it's Chloe." She stares at her phone, willing it to just stay silent so that she can think up an excuse. But she knows it won't. She knows that she's given Chloe way too many evasive texts today. So when it rings again, right on the tail of the last call, she bites her teeth together and slides the phone to Jesse. Her eyes must be sufficiently panicked, because he actually answers for her.

"Mmph ermegh?" It's around two bites too many of garlic crust, but Beca has a few precious extra seconds to think of come up with an acceptable reason. She eyes Jesse as he's nodding and responding.

"Mmwah wih hrm. Mhmm!" Her brow knits as he nods again. Were they having an actual conversation? Just as she's trying to suss out his words, their eyes connect and he's handing the phone over with an apologetic shrug. She backs up, scooting her chair and throwing her hands up between herself and the table like she's trying to ward off a sneeze from him.

"Dude! No! I don't- I haven't- no- hi Chloe!" She shuts her eyes and hopes that her voice being an octave higher than normal is unnoticed.

"Beca? Are you alright?" But obviously it is.

"Uh, yeah! I'm good! How are you, bright eyes?" As nervous as she had been a second ago to talk to Chloe, she finds herself relaxing a bit when she actually hears her voice through the phone. She misses her girlfriend.

"I'm good. Just wondering what you've been up to. You've been kinda weird today, babe."

She laughs awkwardly, clearing her throat and sipping her drink before answering. "Um, no, I've just been hanging out with Jesse. Needed some best bud time." Chloe's responding grunt conveys her disbelief.

"Well, if you say so. I honestly think something's up, but I'll just let it go on the condition that you'll tell me later." Beca leans back in her chair.

"Trust me, you'll definitely know. There's no way I won't tell you." She shares a smile with Jesse as he tries to stuff another slice into his mouth.

She hangs up with the distinct feeling that Chloe wouldn't be truly calm until she knew. Beca picks some of the crust from her pizza, depositing the bits in a pile on the edge of her plate. Jesse mumbles around his food.

"So, wah ah you go do?" It's hard to understand, but she's able to piece it together.

"I'll figure something out." She doesn't have the ring just yet, but its weight is already starting to press on her.

She needs to find the perfect moment.

* * *

It seems that the 'perfect moment' is set on evading her grasp perfectly. Beca feels her face tighten, gripped by the stress of a nearly lost engagement ring. She stuffs it in her pocket and tries to ignore the moisture seeping into her pants.

Needless to say, this one had been a fail.

She'd had their waiter slip the ring onto the straw of Chloe's drink (after carefully memorizing his face and getting his full name, for security reasons). However, it went completely unnoticed, camouflaged by the tinkling sounds and sparkling flashes of the ice cubes. It sat in the lemony water the entire hour, and Beca's pretty sure she aged much quicker during the meal than the preceding two months together.

After the meal was over, she'd had to start a small spat, confusing Chloe and hurting her feelings in order for her to actually leave the brunette behind at the small table, just long enough for her to pluck the ring out from between the ice. Chloe had given her a similarly cold reception when Beca caught up to her.

And that wasn't the only fail.

Three days earlier, her attempt to serenade the redhead in public had not gone well.

Well, it had, but not the way she'd wanted it to.

Chloe had been thoroughly pleased, eyes shining and body buzzing with excitement as she joined in during the second song. Beca's plan was to get Chloe wound up by having her sing along, then finish with a personally written, yet-to-be-a-chart-topper. Then she'd start a dumb little song with a simple tune, and work into the proposal. Take advantage of sunshine eyes and flying hearts and whatnot. But they were just too good at the music thing, and they just sounded too good together.

Right at the end of said second song, people had started approaching, asking if they were celebrities or if they were on YouTube. Then came the onslaught of photo requests and, for reasons unknown to her, autographs.

Chloe had simply laughed and played along gamely, not questioning anything and the moment had been swept away.

So the score was currently set with Beca spectacularly **not** in the lead, and the stress built with every failed attempt. She watches Chloe, driving with a determined stare at the road, eyes blazing even through her sunglasses. Beca sighs.

"I really am sorry, Chloe," she says, skimming her fingers over Chloe's forearm. The redhead's lips purse and she grips the steering wheel harder.

"I just don't get it. You've been so... **off** this whole week. We're fighting over stupid things, you get moody at the most random times. I... What is going on, Beca?" Her exasperation and confusion laces her words, wringing Beca's heart out. This was not how it was supposed to go.

"I'm just... trying to deal with something, and I don't know how to do it. I didn't mean to hurt you." What a way to fail. She's driving away the woman she's trying to propose to. Beca wants to laugh at herself, but she doesn't want Chloe getting the wrong idea. She files away the dark humor for later. When it'll be appreciated by the both of them.

"What is it that you're dealing with? Why can't you tell me? We tell each other **everything** , Beca," her voice pitches up and strains, obviously bothered by the roller coaster of a week. She can tell that Chloe is remembering the confrontation that led them to going to the doctor.

"Yeah, we do..," Beca mumbles. They really did talk about everything, including who needed to use the bathroom more desperately, and whether one of them would make it to the other apartment in time. "But um, it's really- I can't actually talk to you about it yet. I will soon, though." Chloe turns her head briefly to glance at her.

"Is it about me? Am I doing something wrong?" Beca's insides seize up in panic. Chloe sounds worried. Legitimately worried, like they were possibly facing a real relationship problem. She chokes out a denial, clawing at the redhead's arm in her haste.

"No! N- no! It's not like that! I just-" She growls, rubbing vigorously over her face. "It's not you, I swear. It's actually good! I'm just, y'know. I'm bad at... everything." She has no idea how to assuage Chloe without giving everything away.

"Promise me you'll talk to me if I'm doing something wrong? If I'm doing something that's really bothering you?" Oh God. Chloe sounds so concerned. Beca nods.

"Yeah. I promise."

She needed to figure this out quickly, before her extreme ineptitude ruined the relationship she was trying to cement.

* * *

"So... you still haven't done it." Beca grits her teeth at Jesse's tone.

"Nope." Her response is pushed out through lips pressed thin, and it snips off the end, the second syllable buried under her disdain. Another voice adds itself into the fold, offering undesired opinions.

"And you want my advice on... how to **propose** to a ginger now, hmm?" Beca growls through the whole question, trying not to hear it.

"Amy, I don't think your suggestions would be any help here. I'm not using crocodiles. I'm not using leopard print underwear with shark teeth around the waist," she ticks off her fingers as she lists the ideas, egregious and what she'd call 'dangerously flamboyant'. "I am not wearing khaki nor do I own a khaki jumpsuit. I refuse to use sea snakes - or any kind of snake, for that matter - and I am **not** contacting any Aborigines!"

"Well, you're having such a swell time going at it by yourself, yeah?" Amy's airy tone, pompous and patronizing, grates at her already frayed nerves. She sees Jesse, opening his mouth to offer another option. Maybe he's going to try and diffuse the situation. She brings him into her direct line of sight, getting ready to warn him off, but then something else catches her eye.

The floor lamp in the corner looked strange.

She stares at it for a minute, forgetting her ire. **_Why does it look so weird?_** She couldn't pinpoint what exactly it was that seemed off, but it was bothering her. She speaks over Jesse, suddenly more concerned with this. "Hey, does the lamp look weird to you?" His eyebrows go up, mouth hanging open mid-sentence.

"Uh..." He stares at it, honestly inspecting. Amy goes up to it, poking and then tilting it. Beca stares as well, like maybe if they combined their scrutiny, she'd figure out what was bothering her. Jesse scratches his head. "Um, honestly, no, it doesn't. But maybe it's dusty?"

She can tell he's trying to be generous for her benefit. Even Amy, with her complete lack of social awareness, makes a comment about it being uglier than the last time she saw it. She's ready to give up on it and bury the thought at the back of her mind for later processing, when it suddenly dawns on her that the lamp was utterly nonsensical.

It physically made no sense.

The lampshade was upside down, narrow and inverted, with the metal rim on the outside of the fabric. The pole ran straight through it. There was no space for a light bulb at all. The metal disc at the base was vertical, the pole sitting on the thin edge.

It was an illusion.

Beca's eyes fly back to her friends, waiting for them to turn into specters. She especially stares at Amy, who has been the most present in her hallucinations. They both seem fine, both still occupied with examining the lamp. Amy is actually almost painfully normal, throwing out absurd observations about the rest of their furniture.

"Now that we're talking about it, has this loveseat seen any good lovin', hmm?" Beca's relieved exhale is hidden by the blonde's high and dubious hum. Jesse watches her, but she pretends not to notice. He pats her leg, smiling softly in understanding and turning back to redirect the conversation towards others things aside from roasting their living room.

If she was getting this stressed out, she needed to figure something out fast.

* * *

Beca wipes the sweat from her face with the sleeve of her blue Henley, walking the last bit over to the waterfall. Ahead of her, Chloe's bouncing around, stretching and smiling and breathing deeply. The redhead swings her arms back and forth in her neon pink long-sleeve. Her legs, clad in capri leggings, shift her from side to side. She's watching the water cascading, collecting in the shallow pool at the base of the Sturtevant Falls. The early sun is just peeking into the canyon that they're in.

She still hasn't figured out the right way to propose. No time ever felt like the right time. Emily had offered to help, jokingly insisting that she could hold Chloe's hands for her again. But Beca knows she has to, **wants** , to do this on her own. She needs to.

It would be way too ridiculous if she couldn't get her act together.

But she hasn't been able to come up with anything. And while this rock feels like a thousand sentient pounds, all whispering angrily at her every single waking moment, she's been significantly less harrowed since she's stopped trying to set up the perfect moment.

She has the ring, and neither she nor Chloe are going anywhere.

So, she'd just wait for the golden opportunity. She figures that she'll know. The redhead swings her arm out to lace their fingers as Beca approaches, humming a random song. It's light and fun. Beca mentally adds the little dreamy melody that's been following her, mixing the two songs.

There a few other people around them, all beginning to congregate around the waterfall. A younger couple stops to pose, snapping a few pictures. Chloe sighs as she observes them, clasping her hands together underneath her chin like she was seeing the cutest thing ever.

"Imagine if we'd met each other earlier, Bec." Chloe's voice is wistful, longing and a little sad. Beca wraps her arms around the redhead from behind, also studying the couple and the waterfall behind them.

"You'd have probably hated me. I was so grumpy." Chloe giggles, not bothered.

"I love you **because** you're grumpy, not despite." They both chuckle.

"Well, I was even more grumpy. Surly and angsty. It was a whole," she takes an arm away from a trim waist to wave it about carelessly, "thing. It was a thing I was doing. It peaked in my teenaged years, but I kinda took it with me into- ergh..." She transitions seamlessly into verbal static as she realizes she's about to say 'early twenties'. It was a hardly a long trip from then to now. Chloe snorts, following her train of thought. The redhead pats her arm in consolation.

"I still love you."

She watches as Chloe lopes off to mingle with the other hikers, lighting up the canyon much quicker than the sun. An old man with a disposition far cloudier than Beca's normal setting hacks out a loud and hearty laugh. He's so obviously swept away by whatever Chloe's telling him. Beca feels the redhead's smile from where she stands, winding into her chest and warming her from the inside out. As open as the redhead is, she's really quite an enigma.

Chloe is loving, to nearly a fault. She loves animals and strangers and literature that bores Beca to tears. She loves and loves and loves. Beca is the most lucky, because Chloe loves her.

Despite her many failings and bumbling struggling through what she could arguably say is 'all of life', Chloe loves her.

And Beca is so, so thankful for that.

Chloe's running around, laughing with a little boy who looks to be about eight. They're wading in the pool and he's looking for crawfish. The redhead is earnestly supporting him, also lifting rocks and pretending to be scared about what might be under them. Beca marvels, not for the first time, about how wonderful a mother she'd be. Just above the rhythmic drumming of the waterfall, she hears Chloe's surprised scream and vivacious laughter as one of the crustaceans darts out from beneath the rock she's pried from the surrounding gravel. And at first Beca thinks what she's hearing is the waterfall. But the longer it goes on, the stronger the sound gets, the more she realizes that that's not what it is.

Her hearing seems to be coming and going, replaced with a loud rushing. It makes her a little short of breath, caught in surprise over what's happening. But she can't find it in herself to be alarmed, too focused on watching the love of her life. Chloe's eyes meet her across the distance, brilliant and achingly sweet, smiling with a calmness that makes sense of the noise.

She doesn't even realize that she's moving until her ankles are submerged. Beca quickly glances down, hands flying up for a second in shock. Then she's striding forward again, pulled by an undeniable magnetism, dragged by a need within her that's making her breathing ragged. She **needs** Chloe.

Walking at the edge of panic and lead by a pressing on her chest, she stumbles over to the redhead. Chloe reads whatever emotions are on her face, handing a fistful of smooth pebbles over to the boy and saying farewell to him before moving the few steps needed to meet her. Her arms are around Beca before the brunette has finished walking. They gently collide, Chloe swaying back with the movement before stabilizing them. Beca can see the questions on the redhead's face, but she has no idea what to say. But then Chloe's smiling again, and it's all okay.

She feels the smile sifting through the spaces in between her ribs like a dense smoke, filling up her chest and curling nearly corporeal fingers around her heart. She feels it sitting in her lungs, taking up space and lounging like a heavy beast. She feels it all, inescapably present and staring her in her face, and she tries to take a deep breath. That smile softens. Turns into a gentle flicker.

And it's still just enough fire to light up the smoke inside her chest.

That little spark chases the trail of smoke, like a match to gunpowder, racing into her heart and igniting the stack of dynamite tied there.

When Beca opens her mouth, it's on the tip of a roaring flash of fire. It's explosive and it nearly cracks her gasp into a sob. She buries her face into Chloe's neck, fingers clutching at the small of the redhead's back and sunk into fiery curls. Her words, when they manage to find a way out through the fire, are wet.

"I have no idea what's wrong with me right now." The arms around her shoulders squeeze, wiggling them both side to side and twisting.

"There's nothing wrong. You're fine, Bec." And it's funny that Chloe is telling the brunette that **Beca** is okay. That she could say with certainty that a separate being is okay. Only, it turns out to be true. Chloe just seems to **know** , and somehow, it's right.

Because Beca isn't afraid right now; she isn't scared of Chloe leaving her and she's not terrified of another hallucination. She isn't anxious about the future, for them or her job. She's not angry, she's not sad. She's feeling a whole lot of **something** , but it's not bad, whatever it is.

Chloe hums her little lullaby, blending the melody perfectly with the waterfall, and the rushing in Beca's ears fades. Everything fades, and it's just them. The brunette laughs.

"It's funny how you do that," she mumbles, barely audible with the water nearby, and she continues before Chloe has a chance to ask for clarification, "just make everything alright."

The redhead pulls back, and her eyes are extremely bright this close; they burn into her as they inspect and she lets that tingling sink down her spine. They intertwine their fingers and she feels the tingle settle pleasantly.

"I make everything alright because I'll always love you, babe. Simple as that. Whatever happens, it's you and me against the world." And that's another thing that's funny.

How much this moment feels like the perfect one.

She feels awareness washing over her, covering her in goosebumps, and her eyes go wide. She can see Chloe responding, but Beca's running out of air in her lungs and so she surges forward to take some from Chloe's lips. Those long lashes sweep closed just before they make contact, and she steals a whimper along with the gasp.

Beca doesn't know what's controlling her right now. She only knows that there's something directing this instinct she's operating on. The one that's telling her to walk Chloe backwards carefully over the rocks mid-kiss until the redhead's being dunked under the icy water. The one that's spurring her to laugh at the shocked gasp and soaked hair, and dodge the affronted hands. The same instinct that tells her that her own eyes are sparkling as vividly as Chloe's, telling her to sweep in for another wet hug and a frigid kiss under the waterfall is the same one that's been telling her that this is the right time. And so it's this mysterious instinct that says it's time to speak.

"Marry me."

She can see the surprise in Chloe's face, slack and open. Eyes wide and eyebrows high. She can see the disbelief and the hope. She can see all of it. She can see herself and their future. "What?"

"Marry me, Chloe."

And she had a whole speech ready, complete with cheesy lines and an effusive amount of heartfelt declarations, but the only thing she can remember right now is how silly it feels to have ever been nervous, because everything about Chloe is saying yes even if the words haven't left her yet. She takes Chloe's hands, lips pulling up lopsidedly at how limp she is.

"I've known for a long time that I want to marry you," she puffs a laugh, eyes on their hands, "I think we've both known that we've wanted this for a while." Chloe's still quiet, just watching. "I finally got off of my ass. Which um, I had Em find out your ring size, and really it was a group effort with all of our friends, even though they had bad ideas but they were really supportive and that's all that matters so I guess we have to thank our friends, and-" she shakes her head, "point is," she takes a deep breath and drops to her knee in water that's cold enough to remind her of her hometown, wrestling out the ring that's been living in her pockets and holding it out like it's hot. It seems to be burning her fingers. She shakes her head once to the side, shifting the drops that are falling on her face and pooling in her eyes.

"My point is, I love you so much that it feels like everything in my life has been leading me to this moment; to you. And I don't want to be the kind of idiot that lets something like that go. I **can't** be the kind of idiot that doesn't show you exactly how much I love you. So," she takes Chloe's hand again, pressing the tips of the redhead's fingers against her lips, staring up into those eyes that caught her from the very first time they met, "Chloe, will you marry me?" And because she's Beca, she adds, "preferably forever?"

Chloe laughs. She smiles and laughs, and she's nodding, right hand going up to cover her mouth while the left bypasses the ring and pulls Beca up by the wrist. With a quick yelp, she's standing and being drawn into a kiss. Even though their eyes are closed, even though they're kissing and she couldn't focus this closely anyways, she knows that Chloe's eyes are glimmering, shining like a lake of stars. She can feel how difficult it is for Chloe to maintain the kiss, battling lips that are pulling up at the corners with a tenacity that eventually wins. And so Beca's pressing soft kisses, imprinting her lips against a giant, beaming grin and listening to an impromptu mix of softly elated sobs and rushing water.

She slips the ring on, staring at it before piping up with a, "wait. Is this- is this a yes?"

Chloe slaps her arm and nods her head, hugging her and drawing them completely away from the waterfall. "Of course, dummy! **Of course** it's a yes!"

And Beca blames it on her emotional high when she whoops like she won the Superbowl.

The rest of it is a bit of a blur, with strangers congratulating them and sharing stories. Beca's in a bit of a giddy daze, smiling a dopey smile and she could be agreeing to anything right now and she wouldn't know it. It isn't until they're starting to head back that she keys in. Chloe's swinging their hands like she's trying to fly away, twisting and twirling, skipping and giggling and the air around her is bathed in a soft glow. It would only make sense for Chloe to **literally** shine. The redhead's sigh brings her attention to a point of focus.

"This day turned out a lot better than I thought it would." Beca laughs at Chloe's sunny enthusiasm. She sounds like a brook, babbling and tinkling.

"Yeah. It did. So, forever, right? Or are we going to have divorce to look forward to?" She's really just being facetious, but Chloe turns to her and yanks her in by the front of her shirt, face-first into a searing kiss. The redhead bends her backwards, arm supporting her waist as she dips Beca, kissing her deeply. Beca blames it on the altitude and a little bit of Chloe when she comes away breathless, gasping against her lips and eyelids fluttering.

"Forever, Becs. You and me, forever."

It's hard to blame all of these other things for how hard her heart pounds at those words, though.

* * *

"Your unending smiling is creepy." She smiles harder, and Stacie makes a noise of disgust. It's contrasted by her smile, though. It's why she doesn't shove away the hug she receives. "Seriously. Your face is going to get stuck that way."

"You're just jealous." Ashley laughs as she slides a Cosmopolitan over, settling it in front of Beca. "Thanks, Ash." She takes a sip as Flo addresses her.

"So, Beca, have you two discussed marriage plans yet?" Her face is starting to hurt from the way her cheeks are working.

"Yeah, but nothing concrete. We're thinking we might fly the family out here; it's a lot cheaper than having everyone else fly out." Chloe's parents had been over the moon. Nancy screamed so loudly that Beca heard it from the other room. She's just glad that she'd gotten their blessings with minimal bloodshed.

 _Beca slows down, letting Chloe walk ahead with her mother. Beside her, Michael ambles along quietly. She feels like a dropped can of soda; one tab away from exploding messily. But she's here. She's decided that this was the best time, while she was feeling inspired by the garden's foliage. Maybe it was the Miami air. She clears her throat, and Michael grunts._

 _"So. Um, I know we've only just met," her eyes can't stay on him for very long. His seem to melt her in a very uncomfortable way, "and I'm not sure if I've made a good impression. But," she takes a deep breath, popping her knuckles with her thumb, "I love Chloe. I love Chloe more than I love music." Beca knows that the redhead's parents are fully aware of how important it is to her. Beyond being her livelihood, it was her life._

 _"I love her more than anything, more than I will ever love anything else. And so," she has to work out her breathing and swallowing because they get crossed and she chokes a little. But then Michael slaps her back and it quite literally slaps the moisture out of her throat. "Th-thanks." He nods and avoids her eyes. Beca continues._

 _"I don't want to be with anyone else. I want to be hers for however long eternity is. It would mean the world to me if I- we, could have your blessing, sir." She just barely avoids the urge to bow again, with the way he stares._

 _As they walk, Beca watches Chloe laughing with her mother, pointing at the exotic plants and whining like a kid. Her heart lurches at how beautiful the redhead is. Whatever it is that connects them is on point today, because Chloe turns her head and winks._

 _And that wink is echoed in the stuttering of her lungs. With a sway of hair that's straight out of a movie, she turns back to her mother and Beca's left trying to make sense of why she can't breathe. Michael coughs and rumbles beside her._

 _"You look at Chloe the way I look at my wife." Beca nods._

 _"I hope I can love Chloe half as much as you love Nancy." She secretly thinks that she loves Chloe more than anyone has ever loved anything that's ever existed, but she won't say that aloud. She's back to watching the redheads though, and doesn't add more._

 _"We're just living in their world, huh, Beca." She huffs a tiny laugh, because she agrees. She's been so perfectly content to be the side character, the Robin to Chloe's Batman. But she knows Chloe. She knows that the redhead would spit acid and vehemently disagree, because Beca's been Chloe's star._

 _As much as Beca loves the redhead, she knows that Chloe loves her just as much. She knows that she's Chloe's blue sky as much as Chloe's her sunshine. They're the last missing pieces, signature patches on the quilt, the yins and yangs._

 _She doesn't know how long it's going to take to fix herself, but she needs to figure it out. Because she's looking at the rest of her life, and she can't let that go._

 _"She's my world, Michael."_

 _His strong hand on her shoulder is the only confirmation she needs. The gentle squeeze of fingers pressing down is just extra._

"So who's your Maid of Honor?" Beca snorts, sipping her drink and studying the glass.

"Jesse." There are shrieks around her; lots of protest and offense. She knew this was coming though. "What?" Stacie is lancing her with those big green eyes of hers. "I've known him the longest!" It's true. They didn't meet Stacie until later, a few years into the Bec-and-Jess friendship, with awkward weight shifts and voice development.

"Whatever, I'd better be next to him, then." Beca agrees, and decides to let the rest of the lineup fight itself out. She taps the counter, getting everyone's attention.

"I'm headed out. Chloe and I are gonna go grab a bite." She cuts off everyone's offers to join, knowing they aren't serious. She isn't sure about Lilly's suggestion for lighters and butterfly knives as engagement presents, though. Her face betrays no emotion.

Before she can think too hard on it, she sees a face sticking out from the crowd, smiling at her and pinning her to the sidewalk.

Chloe approaches, hand already extended and their fingers automatically lace. The redhead uses that connection to pull her in for a quick kiss that quickly gets out of hand.

"Mmm, we're in public, Beca." She laughs against Chloe's lips, shaking her head and going in for more.

"Maybe, but I'm kissing my fiancée," she starts, leaving the end unfinished as it's swallowed by Chloe's giggles. She's been using the title for three weeks now, and it's yet to get old. In fact, it seems to have only grown in strength, making her grin wider with every instance. They finally break apart, and her breath is stolen again. As she stares, she remembers one of the first times she met Chloe, on the first day of her guitar lessons. It's almost the same.

The angle of the sun is similar, a bit above setting. The background is the same; it's the ocean. The breeze is blowing just right, moving Chloe's hair across her face in the same fashion. A strand catches in her eyelashes and Beca feels like she's been hit over the head with the flat of a shovel as she watches the redhead blink. When she loses herself this time though, Chloe doesn't question it, just playfully rolling her eyes and pulling Beca along.

And maybe it's because she's still seeing everything in slow motion that she catches it. Maybe it's because her eyes are attuned to catching minute details, so used to memorizing tiny freckles and a very specific shade of blue.

It's because the only sense she's using consciously is her eyes, and so she sees the car as it's approaching.

Swerving steadily out of its lane, crossing into oncoming traffic. She doesn't hear the honking or taste the static in the air. She only sees the car, and feels Chloe's hand. The redhead is still looking at her, soft smirk so casually amused as she strokes along Beca's fingers.

There's really no time, even though it feels like she's walking through an eternity in her recognition of these events. And since there's no time, there's really no other choice.

There's not enough time for them both. Not enough time to build up the needed momentum to take them both out of the way. Beca makes the only choice she ever could have made.

The last thing she sees, the last thing she recalls noticing as she uses their laced hands to pull Chloe to the side and shove her, is how strikingly blue Chloe's eyes are.

Those eyes truly are the bluest thing she's ever seen.


	15. Zero Day Start

**\- -WARNINGS- -**

 **These warnings will extend for the remainder of the story. They will NOT be the in every chapter or last the entirety, but I don't want to spoil the story by setting the mood with something that isn't actually in the writing itself. The warnings include:**

 **Depression, thoughts of suicide, self-harm including but not limited to alcohol usage. Please be advised that these are general warnings and that they may be written about in-depth, and may branch into other triggers not explicitly stated.**

 **Thank you for your continued support.**

* * *

Prelude to Destiny

Ground Zero

* * *

Beca opens her eyes to a nearly blinding whiteness and a deafening silence. She rubs at her face, feeling a tickling on her cheek. Turning her head to the side, she's met with blades of grass poking her cheek and nose. With a soft snort and a swiping of her hand, they move. She presses her hand down into the earth, nails finding dirt. Her head hurts.

"W-wh... whe..." Her words stutter and never release.

"It's quiet, huh?" Beca jerks to the side, away from the sound. Her tension immediately drains upon seeing Chloe, though. The redhead is lying beside her, spread out and staring into the whiteness above them. She scoots over and brushes back Chloe's hair from her face.

"Wh-" She clears her throat, "Where are we? Are you okay?" Chloe nods.

"Yeah. I'm fine. You had quite a bump, though." Chloe smiles softly at her, breathing with a peace that Beca always feels so acutely. The electric blue of her eyes glow and Beca sees a trail of light follow them as Chloe turns to look back at the sky, like glow sticks waving in the darkness.

"Where are we?", she repeats. Chloe shrugs. Beca hears the rustling of her long-sleeved black shirt against grass emphatically.

"Inside." Beca's brow furrows, bunched by confusion.

"Inside? Where?" Is there grass inside a building somewhere? The redhead puffs a little breath of amusement, shaking her head just a bit against the earth beneath her.

"Inside here," she murmurs, pointing to her heart. Chloe drags her finger slowly up, over her throat, across her cheek and up to her temple. "And here." She taps twice against it before dropping her hand. Beca stares as it flops to the side, rocking before settling. Her engagement ring is turned into the green beneath it; the band glints sharply.

"Wait. What?" Was Chloe just being poetic? Chloe's light humming stops the brunette from asking further. It's the melody that's been in Beca's head.

She's never shown or sung it to Chloe before.

The redhead faces her with an expression that digs into her skin. With one big, tired sigh, Chloe's pitying look ends. Her cryptic words spin Beca even deeper into confusion.

"Time to wake up, Beca."

She lunges for Chloe, fingers brushing, before being engulfed in the darkness of her mind.

* * *

There's a rushing all around her, a wild noise, the wind of a hurricane, howling. It's screaming at her in this blackness that she's trapped in. She tries to open her eyes. They feel so heavy. She hears voices, but it's like she's underwater. There's a lot of ringing. Loud, loud. So loud.

"Pa... sh... chell.." Everything sounds so muffled, all at once quiet and roaring.

And there's a voice that sounds familiar, too. Male. "Bec!"

Other people, a few of them.

"Sir, I need you to step back a little." It's a woman's voice. She sounds stern.

"That's my best friend! Let me see her!" It's Jesse.

"We will, but for right now, it's best not to swarm her. She will most likely be disoriented. Please give her some space." And it's still a struggle to open her eyes, but her eyelids don't feel like iron curtains anymore. There's so much beeping.

Everything is blurry at first. There are shapes moving around her, dark on a pale background like reflections on the shifting surface of a lake. As she wakes up more, she becomes aware that her entire body feels like it's weighted down with sludge. "W... Wh- wha-" Why is she having trouble speaking? One of the shapes approaches, slowly gaining visual clarity.

"Hello, Ms. Mitchell. I'm Dr. Gail. Do you know where you are?" It's a blonde woman in a white coat. Beca blinks slowly, still feeling like she's in quicksand. She tries to speak again, but after a few stutters, stops. Her throat is dry and nothing about her body is complying with her commands. The doctor nods.

"You're at the hospital, Beca. A week ago, you were in a car accident. You've been in a coma since." And that weird rushing is back again. She can hear the beeping get louder, more frantic. It echoes on itself, shaking around in her head like church bells in a cave, sounding on all sides.

"Wh- what?" Her voice sounds like it was scraped from the bottom of a barrel, like dregs, gritty.

Jesse comes over. He looks different, but she can't place it. Placing a hand on her arm, he says, "You and Amy were driving, and you guys were T-boned. Amy's okay now, but we've been really worried about you." And now she's a little confused. She doesn't remember going anywhere with Amy before being hit by that car. Clearing her throat, she asks a question.

"What ha-happened to-to Chloe?" Now Jesse is the one who looks confused. His eyebrows furrow, and she's not sure why, but it causes her stomach to drop harshly. He's speaking, but there's some more ringing in her ears and it's drowning everything else out. She shakes her head to clear some of it. "S-sorry, what?"

Jesse stands up straighter, exchanging a glance with the doctor. Just above the rushing, she thinks she can hear her heart stopping.

"Beca, who's Chloe?"

And Beca is conscious the whole time, but she still somehow blacks out. Everything is dark and silent and simultaneously **loud**. She feels the beeping, erratically thumping through her and shaking loose her fragile grip on her composure. Her whole body feels numb. The doctor speaks quietly to someone nearby. When she can see again, she stares at Jesse incredulously. Their expressions are the same.

"Wh-wh-what do y-you m-m-mean, ' **who's Chloe** '?", she spits out. "Dude, my **fiancée**! **Your girlfriend's** be-bestf-friend!" By the end, she's nearly yelling, nearly hysterical. It's harsh and high. Because how in the world could Jesse _not_ know who Chloe is? Without Chloe there would be no Aubrey in his life, and for that reason _alone_ he should know who the redhead is. Dr. Gail writes something down on her clipboard. Beca's hand twitches at the sight.

"When did you meet Chloe, Beca?" She doesn't like the question.

"A year and a half ago. At work." The doctor scribbles away. Beca just tries to figure out why Jesse looks strange, aside from his concerned stare.

"Where do you work?" Beca huffs. It's a little scratchy.

"I used to work at The Music Emporium. Now I produce with New Sound Records." Her eyes zero in on the way Jesse's eyebrows shoot up. The way his own eyes widen as they watch her. Something about the way his face smooths over makes her nervous. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

He moves from side to side, and the motion moves something inside of her, too. Like a boulder that gets that final push to send it careening down a mountain, an unstoppable movement that inevitably ends in a crash.

With a thunderous boom, Jesse's words strike her.

"Beca, you've never worked with New Sound Records. You still work at TME."

She feels the noise building up in her throat, ready to bite him, but Dr. Gail's piercing eyes drag her attention to them.

"Beca, what month do you think it is? What year?"

There's more scratching. Instead of it being in her voice though, it's in her ears, raking darkly eager nails across the inside of her skull. She has a feeling that her answer is going to be wrong.

"It's August 2018." The loosening of Jesse's jaw tells her everything. "What."

Dr. Gail looks somber, and Beca's starting to feel antsy. "Beca, it's February 2017." His voice makes her feel sick. She closes her eyes and tries to rub her head, but a sharp sting and a physical hindrance prevents her from lifting her arm.

"What's this?", she asks, looking at her shoulder. The doctor clears her throat.

"This is from your car accident. You were impaled. Surgery was performed to remove the embedded glass and part of the car's doorframe," she says. She also motions to Beca's head, "you also suffered an injury to the back of your head. Blunt force trauma. There was some internal bleeding, but it subsided." The doctor continues to speak, but all that Beca can hear right now is Chloe's voice.

 _"Oh Beca, what is **this**?"She places her fingers on the back of Beca's shoulder._

 _"It's a really big bruise, Becs." She doesn't remember being shot with a paintball there._

It's a really big bruise. **It's a really big bruise.** She **doesn't remember** being shot with a paintball there.

Blunt force trauma. Dr. Anderson's speaking now, examining the back of her head, parting her hair and gingerly pressing with his fingers.

 _"It's possible that this is the reason for your hallucinations. Did you hit your head on anything?"_

She hears herself responding to his question.

 _"Usually my headaches start from there."_

The headaches. The hallucinations. A car accident.

And suddenly she remembers a dream from a year and a half ago.

 _Amy's driving, following boisterously along with a throwback on the radio, rubbing down her body in time to Christina Aguilera singing about being a genie in a bottle. Beca rolls her eyes, but she's smiling. When the song ends, the blonde addresses her as she flicks the turn signal._

 _"So, Cee's birthday is next month. We have been tasked with festivities. What are we going to do, Beca?" Beca shrugs, following it up with a verbal response._

 _"I don't know. Maybe a show or something?" Cynthia Rose loves music as much as she does, so a concert of some sort would work just fine. Amy hums._

 _"Mhmm, but how about we get strippers, too?" She holds her hand out to forestall a reply that's yet to emerge. "It's a great idea, yeah? Cee's all about the melons." Beca snorts, a noisy puff that she feels pushing at the top of her nose._

 _"Yeah, but... You know what? Sure," she sighs. It just wasn't worth debating. Cynthia would probably enjoy it._

 _"Beca. You seem sad. Do you need some of my confidence? Some of my gusto?" She laughs at Amy's faux concerned tone._

 _"No, I'm good, thanks, though." But Amy's shaking her head, already reaching her right arm to rub her left armpit._

 _"I insist. You're too surly." She's leaning away, back to the passenger side door, but Amy's following her retreat, pushing her hand towards the brunette's face and shoulder, rubbing vigorously. Beca bats futilely. "Smile more, Beca!"_

 _They're laughing so hard that they don't see the truck as it runs the red light._

 _Beca wakes up abruptly, the ringing of a fading dream sounding in her ears. Whatever it was she was dreaming about, it was loud._

She takes a deep gasping breath, feeling a strong rolling of electricity run through her, stopping her heart and kicking her lungs. Her head hurts in a profound way. In a way that's hardly understandable. It hurts in a completely horrifying way.

"No." But 'hallucination Amy' is answering in her mind, trying to crawl out of Chloe's shower.

 _"Whaaaatttt are we going to dooo, Be-ca?"_

Those eyes, rolled back and veins reddened, stare at her from the memory. "No. No, no no no. This isn't right. There's something wrong." She can hear herself, talking faster and clipping the words shorter. But the boulder, the one that keeps crashing and resetting, once again tips from the top of the mountain. It rolls down with a wild starting lurch, knocking loose rocks and ripping up trees as it goes.

How could it still be last year?

She could prove that it wasn't. She'd get Chloe to testify. She'd call Buddy. Hear his eccentric laughter and he'd say something about how inspiring she looks in her hospital garb. Tony would rub her good shoulder, call her 'Kid', and invite her over to be doted upon by Maggie in their spare bedroom since the kids only visited a couple of times a year. Violet would bake her cookies. Emily would ask her if she had to poop in a pan. She just had to get them over here.

"Where's my phone?", she snaps, twitching before her body gives up and flops back. She feels sore and weak. "Where. Is. My. PHONE?!" She screams the last word out, startling everyone in the room. Jesse jerks forward, hand held out as if to help in some way but completely unsure as to how. His answer is meek.

"It- um. It was lost in the car accident." She raises her fist, pounding it down onto the bedrail. The doctor nods to a nurse and leaves the room. The nurse comes over, saying something to her, but she can't hear. The boulder is tearing through her mind, its dull scream outdoing hers.

"JUST GIVE ME **ANY** PHONE!" And instead of crashing, it rolls to the edge of a cliff. She sees through its eyes, out at an endless expanse of ocean. The ground falls away everywhere around her. She's balanced on a needle, precarious and empty-headedly ready for the fall.

Jesse digs into his back pocket, pulling out his phone and handing it to her. With a quick unlock, she's staring at the dialing screen. Those numbers stare back. Every single moment has felt like a point of no return, and yet this one feels the most impactful. She takes a deep, rattling breath, straining her lungs and fighting the tight prison of the surrounding bones, tethered by muscles that push to collapse before she's done breathing. She has the number memorized. She almost doesn't even need to look.

Her thumb hovers over the call button, innocently mocking her with its very existence. She feels like a coward, afraid to verify what she thought was a sure thing. Her hand slips, and in the tightening of her fist, the phone begins to ring.

She's not breathing anymore, but she holds the phone up to her ear.

She doesn't breathe the entire time it rings.

Just when she thinks it's going to go voicemail, a voice on the other side answers and she slips off the edge.

"Hello?" A man with a strong Indian accent answers, voice lilted up in polite questioning. She struggles to breathe around the lump in her throat.

"Um. H-hello. Is- Is Chloe there?", she barely has enough air to vocalize the question and inhales hard to continue with, "Chloe Beale." The boulder is sailing through the air, away from the cliff, off the needle and blowing through the sky on its way down to the water. The endless expanse draws ever closer, opening its blue arms wide and welcoming her into its embrace.

"No, no Chloe Beale, sorry, no." Beca nods, barely mumbling an, "okay, sorry, goodbye," as she hangs up. The impact of the boulder hitting the water shakes her, and her heartrate spikes even higher, setting off an alarm. She drops the phone. The coldness of the ocean surrounds her, muting the sounds of shouting and the sight of the medical staff and Jesse. She sinks into the darkness of a dense black liquid, the beast at the bottom of the ocean whose salinity exceeds everything around it. Instead of repelling her, it draws up to meet her, curling inky tentacles around her and welcoming the brunette into its depths.

She hears Jesse's concerned shouting as the morphine kicks in much too late.

* * *

When she wakes up this time, it's a much smoother transition between unconscious and being alert. The beeping has relaxed, a quiet rhythm that breaks the silence of her darkened room. In the glow of the one light on by the computer, she sees Jesse dozing on the hospital's two-seat couch, curled up and arms tucked tight into his chest.

His hair looks messy, pressed and it's shorter than she remembers it. He has dark circles under his eyes, and his face is a little rounder. Studying the stubble around his face, Beca suddenly realizes that he looks younger. Not simply in a 'healthy eating and exercising' way, but in a much more significant way.

In a 'year and a half' way.

The beep increases its tempo, cutting the quarter notes down into sixth notes. The rise in noise causes Jesse to rustle, but he doesn't wake. She closes her eyes and breathes until her heart evens out again. She needed to stay calm.

Beca knows that they're keeping a close watch on her. Knows that she's on some sort of list for mentally unstable patients. So she's got to play it cool. Act normal. Whatever 'normal' is these days. She needs to bide her time, so that she can get out.

Once she's released, she can find Chloe. Chloe would make everything alright. Everything would make sense once she had her fiancée back. Just functioning without her around is difficult.

She closes her eyes and pretends to be asleep when a night-shift nurse comes in.

* * *

"And are you experiencing any nightmares?" Beca scoffs. Every waking moment here felt like a nightmare. She shakes her head, ready to get a clean bill of health and escape. The nurse types into the computer. "And how are your injuries?" She rolls her eyes.

"I'm fine." The nurse nods.

"Head?"

"Great. Not at all like I've been bludgeoned with a truck." More click-clacking as she types.

"Shoulder? Any extra bleeding?"

"I can't actually _see_ back there, but it's fine. It doesn't hurt that much."

"Is it sore?" Beca sighs loudly.

"It's **fine**. **I'm** fine. Can I leave now?" The nurse's lips press thin as she types. She shifts her weight, and for some reason, the sight of the maroon scrubs irks Beca. There's a knock on the door before Dr. Gail comes striding in, white coat flowing behind her. The floral print of her blouse bothers Beca, too.

"How are you feeling today, Beca?" And if someone asks her again, she's going to throw her pillow.

"I'm ready to leave." Gail laughs, nodding.

"I'll bet you are. We just have to make sure that you're fit to go." If she had to stay any longer, she might start gnawing on the staff. Her angry jittering had been enough to drive Jesse away for a few hours and overnight as well. The three days she's been stuck here as a 'precautionary measure' have been torture. "Alright, well, let me just do some checks on you."

There's the pupil check, prodding around the back of her head, changing her bandage. Jesse comes back just in time to hear the doctor tell her about bandage care and when she'd be ready for physical therapy.

"Okay, and you'll just need to come back in two weeks to see if you're ready for physical therapy. Any questions?" She puts her jacket on.

"Yeah. Can I leave?" Nobody's surprised by her snappish tone. Beca isn't going to be looking into any faces for hurt feelings, though. She needs to go find Chloe.

She barely pays attention to the discharge information, ignoring the mention of a therapist, signing haphazardly before throwing the pen down and flying out the door. Jesse's speed-walking to catch up to her, calling her name and holding his hand out. The elevator door closes before he can make it. Once she reaches the main floor, she presses the top floor before stepping out of the elevator. Beca calls a cab from the public phone at the main desk, briskly tossing out instructions and avoiding the eyes of everyone around her. She's just about to walk out the front door by the time Jesse catches up.

"Beca! Bec, wait! Where are you going?" The cab is pulling up and she approaches it.

"I'm going to go find Chloe." And she'd also find Aubrey to skin him alive for forgetting. She opens the door, glaring at Jesse when he puts his hand on it.

"Beca. You're still on that?" She narrows her eyes, gripping the door harder before yanking it out of his grasp.

"Still on what? On the fact that you don't seem to know who my fucking **fiancée** is? Or the fact that your girlfriend doesn't seem to be in the equation either? On the idea that apparently an entire **year and a half** of my life hasn't happened? That everyone thinks I'm crazy, **again**? **On what** , exactly?" He looks taken aback, the shock shaking his face loose. Beca takes advantage of that in order to slip into the cab, shutting the door. "Drive," she tells the cabbie, ignoring his eyes in the rearview and turning away from Jesse, standing on the curb with an expression like he was just broken up with.

Beca doesn't think about it, too concerned with getting to Chloe's apartment.

* * *

There's a twisting in her guts, winding slowly. It starts the minute she gets in the cab. It ticks tighter and tighter the farther they drive. It's coiled over several times when she gets to Chloe's and Aubrey's place. The setting sun makes everything hurt more.

She can't stop seeing the look on Jesse's face, imprinted on her surroundings as they pull into the complex. Beca opens the black bi-fold wallet she had a year and a half ago - the one she used before Chloe bought her a brick red slim with stitched gold music notes on the side - and pays the cab driver, tipping him generously for quietly enduring the miserable atmosphere she's bathed them both in. He gives her a sympathetic look, nodding as she closes the door.

The stairs seem to stretch a mile wide, drawing her eyes up. It feels like an infinite amount of steps. She digs her keys out of her pocket, pulling through the loop and examining each one.

Chloe's key isn't there.

She exhales deeply, feeling that twisting just a little bit more. Tick. Tick. Tick. Like locking gears, winding and winding and leaving less room for her lungs to expand.

Step by step, up and up.

 _She knocks on the door, checking her phone again. Chloe still hasn't called back. She blows at a strand of hair sticking to her face._

 _"Great job, Beca. Just hang out here like a loser, why don't you," she mutters to herself, shuffling back and forth in front of Chloe's and Aubrey's apartment. She knocks again, a little louder this time. Just as she thinks fifteen minutes might be a bit too long, Aubrey's voice chimes from behind her._

 _"Why are you standing out here looking constipated, Beca?" She scoffs._

 _"I am **not** constipated." But Aubrey just chuckles and unlocks the door._

 _"Chloe not home?" Beca shrugs as she follows the blonde inside._

 _"She said she was, but she didn't pick up her phone when I called, and she didn't answer the door either," she replies as she moves to stand by the couch. Aubrey hums, dropping her purse into the cushions and going into the kitchen._

 _"Do you want anything to drink?" Beca shakes her head before humming negatively._

 _"Mm-mm. I'm good, thanks." She hears a door click and automatically turns to it._

 _Chloe emerges from the bathroom with a towel wrapped around her middle and a smaller towel between her hands, drying her hair. When she notices the brunette, Chloe winks and sticks Beca with a smirk. "Hey there." Beca nods._

 _"I guess I know why you didn't answer the phone or the door, now." The redhead's eyebrows jump up._

 _"I'm sorry, I didn't think you'd get here so soon. Did you wait long?" Beca shakes her head, but Aubrey pipes up from the kitchen._

 _"She was waiting outside like a novice burglar. It was pathetic." She means to snap at the blonde, but Chloe's laugh takes the fire out of her retort. Beca mumbles a quick, "shut up" that only the redhead hears._

 _The redhead rests her arms loosely around Beca's shoulders, hair towel resting lightly over her own. Beca smiles. With a soft peck on the nose, she leads the brunette into the kitchen, fingers laced. Beca totally isn't staring at anyone's butt. She looks up when Chloe opens the kitchen drawer that holds all of the random things like birthday candles and paperclips._

 _"What are you looking for?" Chloe hums, hand still combing through the contents of the catch-all space. With a victorious squeak, she pulls out a key and turns back to Beca, eyes sparkling with the joy of achievement. "What's this?", she says as the redhead places it in her open palm. Aubrey snorts from behind them._

 _"A key, Beca." Beca grunts at the blonde._

 _"Yeah, no shit. What's it for?" Chloe bites her lip, and Beca feels her attention skittering away in time to each bashful twist of the redhead's body, towel swaying against her thighs. Each roll of her bottom lip under pearly teeth._

 _"Well, you're always here. It's really just easier if you can come in whenever, ya know?" The redhead's shyness makes Beca want to squeal._

 _"Are you sure?" Aubrey snorts again._

 _"She literally just said that you're always here. The only thing this changes is that it's more convenient for everyone," the blonde smiles around her glass. But Beca's still half-gone, lost in whatever magic Chloe's exuding. Her whispered "okay" is as breathy as it can get while still being a word. She looks down at the piece of metal in her fingers._

 _For something so innocuous, it sure held so much meaning._

She stares at the outside of the door. B26. Just a solid, light gray door with a peephole and gold lettering. Nothing special. Nothing extraordinary. Beca raises her hand, resting it softly against the wood. A wordless prayer drifts passed her lips. It's a gasp, desperate in her need for reality to be as she remembers. She knocks, eyes shut tightly. The twisting inside of her is locked with hardly any room left for air.

When the door swings open, she's loathe to look. But she can't not.

And at first, she thinks she's looking at one of Chloe's students. An older one, with a latent motivation for learning Russian or singing. The more she studies, the more she knows that's not true.

The woman in front of her was probably in her sixties. An Asian woman who was probably a grandmother. Black hair up in a bun. Wearing a soft yellow shirt with pink paisley print and capri pants in a deeper shade of pink. White apron around the middle with russet marks from cooking. Faded pink fuzzy slippers and thick white socks. Dark brown eyes encompassed by wire-rimmed glasses watch her with a scrutiny that she ignores. She looks beyond the woman and into the living room.

The paint is the same color, the standard white that nobody in the complex is allowed to change. There's a threadbare red and tan rectangular rug underneath a wooden table that was probably found in the seventies and kept because first-generation immigrants never threw anything away. Beca remembers Chloe telling her about the Cuban neighbors she'd played with and grew up around. Containers were always reused. There are no armchairs, only a rocking chair and a couch that's a shade of glittery brown. It looks like felt and the back of a van that contains a shag rug and a bead curtain. There are so many plants in pots around the room. Beca only remembers that there's a person standing in front of her when the woman speaks.

"What you want?" It's not harsh, but it definitely doesn't tolerate nonsense. Beca clears her throat as an itch starts to form at the back.

"Um, is Chloe Beale here?" And she's waiting for the redhead's voice to ring out from within the depths of the apartment, but the woman's firm denial drowns out any potential call.

"No. Nobody. Only me," the woman insists, getting ready to close the door. Beca herself is getting ready to leave. But then she spies red hair from the corner of her eyes, and she's off.

Beca brushes passed the woman, ignoring the raised voice. She ignores the slipper hitting her back as she chases Chloe into the hallway, lured by her tinkling giggle. With a wink and a single finger pressed to her lips, Chloe slips into her room, shutting it behind her. Beca stumbles forward, still not paying attention to the Asian woman yelling at her. With a barely controlled jerk, she reaches the door and turns the handle, falling into the room. She nearly hits her face. Hands slam into the floor just in time.

"Jesus fucking Christ, Chloe," she starts, getting up, "everything is fuc-"

The first thing she really registers is the single bed.

Chloe slept on a queen-sized mattress.

There's a desk setup with a personal computer atop it. Chloe only had a laptop.

The curtains are dark green. Chloe's are pale yellow.

There's no paintings. Chloe loves to paint.

No pictures of Beca and Chloe. No pictures of Aubrey, of Jessica, or anyone she knew. Only pictures of other Asian people.

With an explosive return, the noise that Beca hadn't realized had faded suddenly slams into her ears and her hands fly up reflexively to cup them. The woman is still yelling in her language, still hitting Beca's shoulder with her faded fuzzy slipper. And nothing makes sense.

The coils inside of her snap.

"Wh- what? Chloe?" Where was she? "Chloe?!"

It's too loud.

Beca staggers further into the room, eyes wide and lungs working frantically to support a suddenly failing system. Driven by a quickly dissipating grasp on logic and rationality, she yanks open the closet door, searching in vain for Chloe. She rounds on the dresser, opening each one and the screeching of every twisted bit of metal that'd been wound up snapping overtakes her senses. The panda shirt she'd gotten for Chloe wasn't in the drawer.

Nothing was where it was supposed to be, including the redhead herself.

"Where's Chloe?!", she screams, pulling a drawer completely from the dresser and dumping it onto the floor. She collapses in the pile of t-shirts, no longer neatly folded. Beca bends over, hands around her torso to hold herself together, and tries to take deep breaths.

"I have to find her," she says to the woman standing in the doorway, watching with eyes that speak where words don't suffice. They make up the difference, bridge the gap in language barrier.

'There **is** no Chloe,' those eyes say.

She doesn't remember passing out.

* * *

Beca wakes up to an old TV show being played on the dated television. The old Asian woman is sitting in the rocking chair, sipping from a steaming cup. Her eyes sting, puffy and probably red. Her head is pounding so hard it's making her nauseous. Her throat is sandy and she has to cough a few times before she accumulates enough moisture to speak, shifting the blue and white striped throw blanket.

"I'm sorry. I didn't- I shouldn't have done that," she apologizes. The old woman shakes her head, responding in her language before switching to English.

"It okay. You sad," she says succinctly. Beca barks a laugh that's one step away from a sob and quickly shuts her mouth before it can transform. She tilts her head down in response. The woman grunts and gestures at a steaming cup on the table. Beca's eye twitches as she recognizes the porcelain.

It's the same cup she always drank coffee from.

Chloe bought it for her.

Beca stands up abruptly and the blanket falls to the floor. The nausea pounds at her esophagus, begging for some sort of relief, begging to be let free. She swallows heavily, mouth watering in preparation for vomiting. She stumbles away from the couch, Chloe's voice in her ear.

 _"Maybe you'll stop stealing my fav mug now, Bec."_

"I have to go. I'm sorry, I need to go," she rambles, turning blindly and feeling the beginning of a streak of panic threatening to take her consciousness once more. The woman is talking to her again but she's already halfway out the door, moving down the hall and towards steps that she just barely keeps from tripping on as she flies to the bottom.

She doesn't have the patience or mental fortitude to neither call nor withstand the enclosed space of a cab and decides to walk back to her apartment at a brisk pace, avoiding the encroaching shadows that watch her with judging eyes.

She knows Jesse wouldn't be home tonight.

* * *

She slammed the door as she walked into the apartment. Beca walked passed the couch, ignoring everything and going into the bathroom, where she turned the shower on as hot as it would go. She needs to get clean. She needs to wash everything away.

She can't look in the mirror, instead staring at the towel rack. Steam fills the room, and it's thick, almost too much. **_Good._** Nearly ripping her clothes off, she jumps under the spray, crying out at how hot it is, but refusing to move, because she needs **something**. She needs some other kind of pain aside from the searing in her chest.

She needs any distraction from the gaping hole, wide and bleeding, left behind from returning to this horrible reality. The pain from the hot water opens the dam on all of her emotions, and Beca roughly slams into the tile wall, screaming as loudly as she can.

She screams and screams and screams, because **why** won't it stop? Her chest and throat and mouth burn, filled with a viscous, vile black tar that's choking the life out of her. She claws at her hair, down her face, wrapping her fingers around her throat, trying to scream out the tar, to tear it out, to do **anything**. Because she can't **breathe**. She can't see, she can't hear.

But being able to is actually **worse**.

Because when she **can** perceive? When she can smell, when she can taste, all she finds around her is **Chloe**.

Chloe, whom she taught how to play guitar and was super proud when she finally was able to play something for Beca, and they had celebrated by pouring outrageous piles of whipped cream onto apple pie. Whipped cream that had ended up more on them than staying on the pie.

 _"Becs, you look like Santa Claus right now." She's giggling, but if there was ever a sultry giggle, Chloe's would be the definition. Beca waggles her eyebrows._

 _"Am I Sexy Santa? Or Reject Santa at the unpopular mall. Because there's a big difference." The redhead hums._

 _"Mmm, totes sexy, babe." She leans down and licks some whipped cream off of Beca's upper lip. "And sweet, too." The brunette's breath leaves her in a sharp rush. Her eyes are glued to Chloe's mouth._

 _"Sweet enough to eat?" And there's such a promising smirk on those red lips._

 _"Definitely sweet enough."_

Chloe, who was there when she didn't feel like she was good enough to live her dream. Who always anchored her when she was floating out to sea.

 _"Beca, what's wrong?" Concerned blue eyes track her as she closes the front door. She exhales as much frustration as she can._

 _"I just, I can't, I **can't do**_ _this, Chlo. I can't even write music, I can't make this work. I don't know why and I'm running out of time!" And she can feel herself starting to get worked up, but like a rolling stone, she's not slowing down, the pressure finally starting to take over. "I'm not good eno-"_

 _"Stop right there, Beca Mitchell. You are **incredibly**_ _talented. You've just hit a little road bump." Rising from the couch like a ship from the deep, Chloe smoothly glides around to where Beca has stationed herself at the kitchen island. The comfort of arms rubbing her shoulders makes her realize how tense she is. Leaning over, Chloe looks at the paper that Beca has basically strangled. "What's this?"_

 _"It's what I'm_ trying _to work on. But it just doesn't sound right, and I have no idea why," she mutters disdainfully. In the midst of her dark musings, she notices that Chloe's decided on bubblegum pink nails today._

 _The redhead hums and she picks up the sheet music to uncrinkle it. "Do you have any specific bit that's bugging you?" She straightens herself a bit, leaving an arm around Beca's waist. The brunette nods._

 _"Yeah just this dumb part, but the whole thing is weird, too. Maybe I should just throw it out and start over."_

 _Chloe doesn't respond as she looks over the music, occasionally humming to test out a sound. After what feels like forever but is probably only about five minutes, Chloe speaks again. Beca comes back with a bottled water as the redhead points to the section that had been irritating her. **The whole thing** , she snarks mentally._

 _"Okay so, this part here? Maybe add a little run, like this." Chloe does that thing, where she opens her mouth and magic happens. And even though it's not the first time she's heard the redhead sing, it has the same effect on her. And to Chloe, it's just the same as breathing. Beca reckons that the redhead's breathing hits her the same way, too._

 _"And maybe we can change the key, it might help. I think this one makes the song sound a little, mmm, too moody? How do you feel about it?" The redhead crinkles her nose. "I think it'll sound better with a brighter vibe." As Chloe runs through the song again, Beca finally realizes why the song never sounded right._

 _It wasn't the run, or the key change. It was the fact that it was supposed to be_ Chloe _singing this song, not some famous artist. "So, Beca? What do you think?" The brunette coughs._

 _"I think, I love you." And there's that smile, shining on her like a hundred thousand gentle sunbeams in an endless forest, so unbearably bright but so incredibly soft._

 _"I love you, too, baby."_

Chloe, who was the other half of Beca's heart.

Chloe, who Beca had never met.

Chloe, who **wasn't real**.

And Beca throws up.

Because **how**? How could this be? How could this world exist, how could **Beca** exist with such a huge part of herself missing? She feels numb and like she's on fire at the same time, a body full of third degree burns, flames carving away until there's nothing but bone. She sinks to the floor of the shower crying. Her sobs sound like she's trying to cough up saltwater, tearing her throat as it comes back out.

Her body shudders violently, unable to deal with the shock. Memories of Chloe run through her mind on an endless loop, reliving a life that never happened.

 _"I guess you really fell for me, huh?"_

She screams, slamming her hands into the tile, trying to claw through it.

 _"I think you're alright, too. Really, really alright."_

Another choked sob, more black fire, digging into her bones.

 _"I've never loved anyone as much as I love you. Please, don't leave me. I don't think I could take it."_

And the water isn't hot enough. Nothing burns enough to take out this pain.

 _"You've always been somebody to me."_

She stands up and rips the shower caddy from the wall, violently throwing it and sending bottles flying.

 _"I don't know how this isn't a dream, Beca. Sometimes, it feels like you're too good to be true."_

Over and over, every laugh, every sigh, every declaration of love, roaring through her mind like a trainwreck, pulling up bits and pieces of herself as it barrels through. She pounds her fist into the wall, recoiling when the tile cracks and her knuckles come away bloody. She knows she's hurt but she can barely see the red spiraling down the drain, eyes clouded with memories and tears, and haunted by the sounds of a woman she only knew and loved in a dream.

 _"Forever, Becs. You and me, forever."_

* * *

 **AN: We were always meant to come to this point, and it hurts now that we're here. I appreciate all comments. Thanks again, friends, for reading.**


	16. Aftermath

**AN: First off, thank you for the amazing reviews last chapter. They mean so much to me. I hope this clears up some of the things mentioned in the reviews (like why nobody else went to the hospital, which was something I should have touched on in the last chapter but I didn't realize how it would seem when I had it slated for this ch.)**

 **I would also like to apologize for being late with this. Real life gets busy. You know the drill. I'm both happy and sad that y'all were so affected by the last chapter. Happy because it means I wrote it well enough to evoke emotions, and sad because, well, it's sad.**

 **A notice about formatting change. It's really something that I should have considered before I got halfway into the story, especially with the large amount of memories. Previous chapters have been edited to reflect the change, and this notice is really for the folks who have been reading from when this story first came to be.**

 _Memories_ in _Italics: Flashbacks_

 **Emphasis** in **Bold** : She **loves** cheese.

 _ **Beca's Thoughts**_ in _**Bold & Italics, Emphasis**_ **_Underlined_** : _**I really love cheese, so much,**_ she says as she stuffs cheese in her mouth.

 **Also, chapters won't be following the Timeline titling, just because specificity insofar as that is not as important in this arc. I haven't decided on how I want to title them yet so they'll be plain until I figure that out.**

 **With that being said, please enjoy the next chapter.**

* * *

She thinks the shower is cold now. She really has no idea. She can't feel anything.

Vaguely, she can hear someone talking to her. It's Stacie, placing a towel on her shoulders and taking her out of the shower spray. Pulling her into a hug that's too tight and not tight enough because Beca wishes that it could squeeze the life out of her. Make real how she feels, instead of keeping her stuck as a ghost in a rotting body.

"-ca, Beca, come on. Let's get you dressed." Arms are directing her one way and the other, into clothes, into another hug.

"Let's lie down. I'll make you something hot to drink."

 _"Baby, lie down with me." A suggestive wink._

"Do you want tea? Hot chocolate?"

 _"You should really try drinking tea, it's good for you."_

"Beca?"

 _"Becs? Babe?"_

"No. No, I don't want tea. I don't want **anything** _._ " She sounds dead. Stacie nods from the doorway.

"How about you just lie down then?" Beca turns to look at her bed, gripping the towel around her shoulders like a shield.

 _A breathless Chloe, hair splayed around her, surrounding her like a halo of fire, on her back in Beca's bed. An awed smile curving her lips around every deep exhale. Eyes sparkling like diamonds in the sun. Miles of smooth skin, like a map made of silk, dotted with freckles._

There's no Chloe, but the bed is exactly the same.

 _ **There will never be a Chloe here.**_

Beca kneels down and vomits, scratching at her face, wailing between every heave of her body. There's nothing in her, but it's like her body is trying to rid itself of the memories. Thoughts that once brought her so much happiness, now pulling her down into a black abyss. She feels darkness, insidious and putrid, lingering at the edges of her vision.

Stacie shakes her, voice rattled with alarm. Her grip on Beca's shoulder hurts. Everything hurts. She doesn't want to open her eyes because she knows that what she sees won't be what she still desperately hopes for it to be.

"Beca?!" Beca cries harder.

"Please tell me that this isn't real," she mumbles frantically, searching the room with unseeing eyes, wringing her towel between her fingers. "Please tell me that this is some sort of nightmare." Stacie looks confused.

"I don't- I don't know what's wrong, Beca." She looks at Stacie.

"Jesse hasn't told you." It's not a question, she knows he didn't. He hasn't told anyone. Only told them to give her space, after the ordeal with Amy at the hospital happened. The tall brunette shrugs.

"No, he didn't really tell anyone anything. Amy said to give you some space, too." Beca sees the concern warring with the desire not to pry. She nods at Stacie. She isn't surprised. Amy had been just as confused as Jesse.

 _"I came over here as fast as I could," Amy announces as soon as she's crossed the threshold into the hospital room. The blonde makes a beeline right for Beca, grabbing her hand and bringing it to her face. She cradles Beca's smaller hand in between her own. "I'm so,_ _ **so**_ _, sorry, Beca. I shouldn't-" Beca shakes her head._

 _"I just- Did we really get into a car accident?" Amy's eyebrows go up, but she nods._

 _"Yeah, bad one at that." She'd been informed. "We were all so worried. If- If you'd nev-" Amy cuts herself off, taking a deep breath. "I'd never forgive myself." It's a testament to the magnitude of the situation, how serious Amy's being._

 _"It totally wasn't your fault," she assures. "But anyways, I have a very important question to ask you." She finds her mouth abruptly dry. "I... I um- do- do you remember Chloe?" And Beca wants to add Chloe's surname, like it'll make a difference. The blonde's questioning narrowing of her eyes feels much more painful than it should. She shuts her own eyes. "I guess that's a 'no'."_

 _"I'm sorry, Bec, who's Chloe?" She's trying not to cry, but a few tears make their way out, and her heart burns, aching from its missing piece._

 _One, big, Chloe-shaped hole in her heart. She grits her teeth._

 _"Chloe._ _ **Chloe**_ _. Ginger, smiles a lot, for some reason beyond me thinks_ _ **all**_ _of your stories are so interesting._ _ **That**_ _Chloe," she rumbles, just barely keeping from whimpering. "The one that was going to go the alligator farm with you in Florida."_

 _"I... Beca. I'm sorry, I don't know who you're talking about." Her sigh is wet, raspy and broken._

 _"Of course you don't. Nobody does._ _ **Nobody knows**_ _," she sobs, turning away from Amy and the silent Jesse sitting in the chair just behind the blonde. "Just go, please. I want to be alone." She hears the rustling as Jesse stands up. A hand lands on her good shoulder and she flinches._

 _"I_ _ **said**_ _that I want to be alone!" It's too loud. Too harsh. She knows that these are her friends. They're just concerned. But everything hurts so much and part of her feels like these are different people, because a person can grow so much in the span of a year and a half. They can grow so much with new friends. And so Beca's surrounded by several different ghosts - the ghosts of her dream reality, and the ghosts of the people she left behind to live in that world._

 _Everyone is a ghost. Including her._

 _"Beca, I'm so sorry," Amy repeats. She makes her way to the door before she decides to speak again. "We're all here for you. Friends. Always." And Beca doesn't want to hear anything about 'always', because she used to think that certain things were sure. There was someone missing who was supposed to 'always' be around. But here she is, being told by another person close to her that they don't know who Chloe is._

 _Amy leaves, and Jesse's still in the room, breathing and shifting on his feet. His jacket rustles and he clears his throat but doesn't say anything. Beca feels his presence, just as heavy as if he was pressing down on her chest._

 _"Please, Jesse. Don't-", her breath hitches. She takes a deep breath before continuing. "Please. I can't, I... I need to be alone. I need to get out of here." She doesn't add that she needs to find Chloe._

 _"Yeah. Sure. I'll, I'll be back later. I love you, Beca." Her tears feel hot on her skin. She nods, not turning around and not speaking._

 _When was the last time she told Chloe that she loves her?_

Beca clears her throat, ignoring her own loud and broken sob that follows. Stacie says nothing, simply rubbing Beca's arm and sitting next to her on the floor after she cleans up what little the shorter brunette had managed to expel from her stomach. They sit that way for nearly half an hour before she feels like she can say anything.

"You'll probably think I'm crazy, too," she starts, turning away from her bed and staring instead at the corner of the room. There's a sizeable dust bunny there. Stacie shrugs again.

"Takes a lot for me to think that something is crazy," she smiles softly. Beca's afraid to laugh for too long because laughing and crying are almost the same activity. She's afraid that she won't be able to stop if she gets started again.

"Do you know who Chloe is? Chloe Beale?" Beca doesn't even have to finish speaking to know.

"Sorry, Beca. I don't," Stacie apologizes. "But maybe I do? Have I met her somewhere?" Beca knows that she's being kind and entertaining her, because someone with a brain like Stacie's didn't forget too many things. And someone like Chloe?

Well, she was unforgettable.

"If you have to ask, then you definitely don't," Beca starts, "But she's got red hair, blue eyes, a killer smile, sings, speaks Russian?" She finds herself hoping against her better judgment. Her face drops again when her friend's face wrinkles in apology. Beca nods shortly, but before she can spiral again, the leggy brunette grabs her hand.

"How about, I help you look?"

* * *

Stacie puts the phone down. Beca doesn't need to turn around. She heard the conversation.

"Becs..." Beca shakes her head.

"Just... just don't."

She didn't think it could get much worse. But hearing that Chloe had never attended Barden University was too much.

Beca had called the Beale's number, still finding room within herself to be startled when someone other than Nancy answered the phone. She gets up and goes into the kitchen. She doesn't know what she's looking for, but she needs to move. Her muscles tingle with frantic energy, clawing at every fiber to get out. Before she even realizes it, she finds herself sorting through the cutlery drawer, rustling through the forks and spoons like there was a specific one she's intent on finding. Stacie stands a few feet away, simply watching for a moment. Beca cuts her off when she makes to speak.

"Jesse should be home soon," she lies. Stacie sees it for what it is as well. Jesse had gone to Maine to see his ailing grandfather. Beca recalls him mentioning it one of the days he was in the hospital with her.

"Beca." She closes the drawer and moves to another. This one is full of sauce packets and disposable cutlery. "Beca."

"Hmm?" They have a lot of ketchup packets. She starts to organize them by condiment type.

"What are you doing?" She shrugs and continues her work. "You know as well as I do that Jesse won't be home for another two days. Why are you lying to me?"

"I kind of just want to be alone and I didn't want you to feel bad about leaving me here," she supplies. When did they get so many grape jelly packets?

"I don't feel right leaving you alone. I also don't want to leave anyways. If you need space, I can hang out in Jesse's room or something." A hysterical peal of laughter escapes at the thought. Aubrey used to sleep in Jesse's room sometimes when he wasn't home. It felt weird for Beca to think about Stacie lying in that bed. She shakes her head when the brunette sends her a questioning look.

"That's fine. I'm just gonna-" Beca closes the drawer abruptly and the silverware crashes inside. She walks towards her room. "Do whatever you want, dude. I need to lie down. My arm's killing me." She's barely noticed it, with the way everything else was hurting.

She can barely stand to look at her bed again, instead sitting next to it and resting her head on the edge. With eyes shut, she nuzzles her nose into the duvet, searching for any lingering scent of Chloe. But there isn't any.

 _"Could I convince you to just-" Beca waves her hands at her bed, "roll around on the bed?" Chloe looks at her skeptically._

 _"You want me to do_ _ **what**_ _, now?" Beca rubs at her cheek with the side of her palm, trying to brush away the heat._

 _"Um," and Chloe's watching her with an amused expression, eyebrow arced and laughter in her eyes, "like," slowly approaching with swaying hips and quirked lips, "lie down in my bed? And move around in it." Hands encircle her waist, rubbing softly over the material of her shirt._

 _"Beca Mitchell. Are you propositioning me?" Beca rolls her eyes, trying weakly to push the redhead away at the shoulders._

 _"Normally, yes. But this time I just," she feels like she's going to sound creepy, "I just like the way you smell. It helps me sleep. And I- um, I want to be able to smell you on my sheets, even when you haven't spent the night." Chloe's eyes are bright._

 _"You're the sweetest," she pulls Beca closer, locking her arms when the brunette tries a bit harder to escape, "cutest," kissing over lips that protest the adjective, "most wonderful little creature I've ever met." Beca sputters._

 _"'Creature'? What am I, an animal?" Chloe drifts her nose along the line of Beca's shoulder, sweeping up a neck that automatically accommodates her._

 _"You're divine, whatever you are, baby."_

Tears leak out, soaking the duvet. Her throat burns with the pressure of her strangled sobs. Beca grabs the fluffy blanket, pulling it off the bed and wrapping it around her. Everything around her feels like a room of lies, doppelgangers masquerading as the world she thought she knew. Her body feels heavy with anguish, like dark chains searing into her skin and weighing her down.

"Chloe. **C-Chloe** ," she sobs out, twisting the blanket tighter around her, gripping hard enough that she can feel her fingers digging into her palms through it. She tries to swallow around the lump, but she ends up choking and sobs harder. "Why is this happening?", she rocks back and forth, crying into the duvet and trying to muffle her voice.

When Beca was five years old, she burned her fingers on the stove top trying to help her mom make breakfast. She wanted to sneak a peek at the eggs in the pan, and ended up touching the heated metal of the pan itself in her attempt to stand tall enough to see. She remembers the shock, jolting through her system in a sharp zing. She remembers gasping before crying. Three of her fingers had blistered and it ached for a solid two weeks. She couldn't touch anything.

Her bed burns her hands in a similar way now, screaming at her to let it go. The flames dance up her palms, searing her fingers and licking up her wrists. A hundred little voices in a hundred different pitches, and she feels like she's standing at the mouth of the Underworld, crying into a gaping chasm that cries back with the sounds of a thousand lost souls. Each one is a memory of her and Chloe, running up through her veins from her fingertips.

 _"I love waking up next to you," Chloe murmurs as she brushes Beca's hair back over her ear, lingering at the curve of her jaw before tracing along it. She pushes the brunette's chin up and scoots closer, sliding her head across the sheets the scant distance needed to connect their lips. "You're so beautiful," she whispers into Beca's mouth, eyes closed. Beca grasps the hand at her chin, bringing it up to pepper light kisses on the knuckles._

 _"Maybe we can wake up this way forever." Chloe's eyes shine so brightly that it makes Beca's heart hurt._

 _"Promise?"_

"Where did you go?", she whimpers, bringing the duvet up over her head and pressing her forehead into her knees. "Why am I here without you?"

 _Chloe folds the sheets of Beca's bed, huffing the entire time. Beca pretends not to notice the glares she's receiving, hiding her smirk behind her fist as she clicks on random things on her laptop._

 _"I can_ _ **see**_ _you doing nothing on your computer, Beca," she grumbles, fixing the bed with sharp movements._

 _"Hmm? Sorry, I didn't hear you."_

 _"Why is it so hard to make your bed?"_

 _"We're going to sleep in it again tonight. Why does it matter?"_

 _"Because! It's the principle of being disciplined!", Chloe retorts. As soon as the redhead is done straightening everything, Beca turns in her chair and tackles Chloe onto the bed, rumpling it and ruining her hard work. She can_ _ **feel**_ _the heat of Chloe's ire. She rolls the redhead over her, pulling her along by her grip on Chloe's shirt. Thankfully, she braces over Beca with her elbows. Beca winks as her eyes drift._

 _"Oops, I guess I wrinkled the bed, huh," she says to Chloe's lips, sliding her hand up from the middle of Chloe's shirt to fist at the collar, yanking down and biting lightly on the redhead's bottom lip. Chloe groans, and Beca feels it pouring over her. The redhead bites back, soothing with the tip of her tongue before shaking her head and laughing quietly._

 _"You're such a brat, Beca Mitchell."_

Stacie respectfully honors her wish for privacy, not once entering her room, even as she wails against her bed, bent over and slumped onto it, beating her fists into the springs and screaming. "Why am I here?!", she sobs again. " **WHY?!** " She turns and kicks her computer chair over, glaring at it as she weeps openly.

 _"This is a fun chair," Chloe says as she spins back and forth. "So many memories." She winks at the brunette._ Beca stares at the overturned chair, one wheel still spinning slowly.

 _"I guess you really fell for me, huh."_

Beca crawls onto her bed and curls up, facing the wall and trying to sleep.

She ignores Chloe's voice echoing in the dark room.

* * *

 _"Wake up, sweetheart. You're going to be late for work," she kisses Beca's shoulder, "_ _ **again**_ _," Chloe laughs into smooth skin._

Her shoulder actually throbs, hurting enough for her to acknowledge it. She knows that Stacie is still here, that she'd been in the room at least once. Beca spies her pain killers and a glass of water on her desk. Sunlight filters through the blinds. Outside of her room, she hears the tv quietly running.

 _"I love this show, Becs," Chloe comments as she puts the remote down._

She rolls over, staring at the door.

 _There's a small knock, and Beca looks up. It's Chloe, leaning against the doorframe, head rested against it. "You okay, Becs?"_

 _Beca nods, the beginnings of a smile making its way out from underneath her feelings._

 _"Yeah. I'm great. I'm just happy."_

She shuts her eyes.

 _Chloe rubs along her back, softly singing her little lullaby as Beca takes deep breaths. When she opens her eyes, the redhead smiles. "Bad dream?" Beca nods._

 _"You were shot this time," she mumbles, curling into her girlfriend. Chloe kisses her temple and starts the song again._

Beca opens her mouth, letting the words flow out as she tries to sing herself back to sleep.

" _Once, there was a way, to get back homeward_ ," her throat is raw from crying, " _Once, there was a way, to get back home._ " She takes a shaky breath, pulling the duvet closer about her and struggling to continue. Tears fall, hot and heavy, constantly and soaking the bed. " _Sleep, pretty darling, do not cry. I will sing a lullaby._ " It doesn't sound the same as when Chloe sings it." _Golden slumbers fill your eyes,_ " every word that passes her lips feel like it's been brushed with acid, worn down and discolored. Full of holes and broken into pieces. " _Smiles await you when you rise,_ " her voice breaks and she sobs quietly. " _Sleep, pretty darling, do not cry, and I will sing a lullaby._ " It sounds like a weathered house, a haunted remnant from a bygone era. Chloe's lullaby had become dissonant to her ears. She barely makes it through the song. " _Sleep, pretty darling, do not cry, and I will sing a lullaby._ "

"Who sings that song?" Stacie stands just inside the room, leaning against the wall by the door. Beca shakes her head, not moving otherwise, curled into a ball on the corner of her bed.

"Chloe." The taller brunette nods. She walks over, sitting on the edge.

"Come on. Let's get you something to eat." Stacie pats her foot, pulling on the blanket just a bit. Beca gets up and follows her, eyes puffy and lungs burning. "Anything you want?" Beca stares into the cupboard as Stacie pulls a mug and bowl out.

 _"Why are you putting so much tea into my cupboards, Beale?" Chloe scoffs._

 _"Beca, all you have is coffee. By your standard,_ _ **any**_ _tea is 'so much tea'." Beca nods in agreement._

 _"If you don't drink it, it'll just collect dust." The redhead shrugs._

 _"I plan to be here often enough to drink it all."_

Beca takes a deep breath, eyes clenched tightly as she shudders. Stacie slides a hot mug towards her. The scent of Earl Grey fills her nose. "I don't know if I can eat." Stacie places a pot on the stove and clicks on the heat. The steam from her mug clouds her eyes when she opens them.

"Well, I'll figure something out." Beca nods to Stacie's turned back.

"Okay."

She honestly doesn't know if she can swallow anything.

Beca has no idea how long she looks into her tea, but eventually her friend pushes a bowl towards her. Beca bites back a sob, taking a huge gasping breath as she picks up the spoon and stares at the contents of the porcelain in front of her. Her breath stutters out violently.

"I don't think I can eat this," she mumbles wetly. Stacie's eyebrows furrow.

"Why not? Something wrong with chicken noodle soup?" What did she say to that? " **Yes** "? She shakes her head and leans over the bowl, fighting against herself as her body betrays her, crying haltingly into it. She grips the spoon tightly, fist shaking as sobs rack her body. The more she tries to stop, the harder she cries.

 _She hates being sick. Beca whines as she sits on the couch, body aching and pouting at her phone. Chloe hasn't texted back in about an hour. Beca pouts harder, kicking her feet under her blanket and wiggling on the couch. The doorbell rings, interrupting her pity party. She grumbles moodily as she drags her aching body from the comfort of the cushions._

 _"Ugh, no, go away," she wheezes out, slowly shuffling across the room in her socked feet. Beca cracks the door open, peeking through. When she hears someone singing, she widens the gap and gapes._

 _Chloe's standing there, smiling like sunshine and singing Daniel Powter's 'Bad Day' as she holds a container of something that seems warm. Beca's eyes flit between the redhead's face and the steam collecting inside the top edges of the rectangular plastic box. Chloe's nails have little flowers painted on them._

 _"_ 'Cause you had a bady day, _" she winks at Beca, bouncing on the balls of her feet, "_ You're taking one down. You sing a sad song just to turn it around. _" Beca feels herself become increasingly aware of how frumpy she looks, with her wild hair and hoodie. She scratches her calf with the toe of her socked foot, grabbing the door jamb with one hand as she buries the other in the pocket of her sweater, fist knocking against her abdomen._

 _"_ You had a bad day. The camera don't lie, _" Chloe approaches, singing her way into the room as Beca unthinkingly leans aside to let her in. They stand in the entrance, Beca shoving the door closed with the side of her foot and Chloe holding the container against her thighs, one palm over the other and legs crossed as she twists from side to side, quietly singing._

 _"_ You had a bad day, _" she finishes, smiling softly. Beca laughs, covering her mouth with the sleeve of her hoodie when she coughs._

 _"What are you doing here?", Beca asks. Chloe shrugs._

 _"You said you're sick. I've got soup," she brings the container up, waving it around. "Chicken noodle." Beca nods._

 _"Yeah, but I mean, you didn't have to," Beca starts, quickly changing her tone when the redhead's face falls minutely. "I mean, I'd love some soup. But you didn't have to go through the trouble."_

 _"I wanted to."_

 _"But we just met."_

 _"But I wanted to."_

 _And what can she really say? Chloe smiles like she had her pick of rewarding activities and this was her top choice. What can she do but be flattered?_

 _"Don't get upset if you get sick," she warns, narrowing her eyes when Chloe smirks._

 _"Whatever would we do that would get me sick, Beca?" Beca turns away, ignoring the giggle that follows her. Chloe goes to the kitchen, grabbing a bowl and a spoon, coming over just as Beca is finished tidying her immediate vicinity._

 _Beca drops down on the couch like a sack of potatoes, tired and achy. She tries to move over when Chloe sits down practically on top of her, but has nowhere else to go when the redhead scoots again. Eyebrows rising, she says nothing. Chloe beams and pours some soup into the bowl. She's waiting for Chloe to hand her the bowl, but instead she holds it up, blowing on the spoon before hovering it in front of Beca's mouth._

 _"Uh." Chloe's not looking at her eyes, and Beca ducks a little to catch her gaze. "What are you doing?"_

 _"Feeding you." Beca rolls her eyes, an action Chloe mirrors._

 _"I realize that. You_ _ **know**_ _that I'm a big kid, right? Been using spoons my whole life," Chloe snorts, "I'm actually pretty adept at soup-eating, too." Beca holds her hands out for the bowl._

 _"You're sick. Let me coddle you."_

 _"You coddle people you just met, then?"_

 _"I'd like to coddle you," Chloe grumbles, furrowing her brow and frowning at Beca. The brunette laughs. She opens her mouth, but Chloe cuts her off with, "just let me feed you." Beca nods, leaving her mouth open._

 _"You know, you really don't have to do this," Beca says after she swallows her soup. Chloe blows on the next spoonful, and Beca gets caught up watching pink lips pursing._

 _"If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong." Beca looks up._

 _"What?" Chloe pushes the spoon into Beca's mouth, staring distractedly._

 _"Just **let** me feed you, Mitchell." Beca grumbles but acquiesces. "So, how come you don't drive?" Beca shrugs._

 _"It's not that I can't, I just have never needed my own car here." Chloe puts the bowl down on her lap as Beca picks up her water._

 _"Did you get your licensed suspended?" Beca shakes her head, arching an eyebrow in question as she sips. "Are you sure? Because you're driving me crazy." She chokes on her water._

 _"That was- what was that?" Chloe presents the brunette with another spoon._

 _"Apparently that was me nearly rendering you speechless, babe," the redhead mutters. Beca's heart shoots up into her already sore throat at the petname. She chews on her bottom lip._

 _"You're ridiculous." Chloe shoves the spoon into Beca's mouth, smirking as the brunette sputters. "And you've ruined chicken noodle soup for me."_

 _"Awes."_

She can't seem to stop crying, shaking her head harder when Stacie puts her hand on Beca's good shoulder. Beca pushes the bowl away, dropping the spoon with a clatter and getting up.

"I need to use the bathroom." Her voice sounds strung out, stretched thin like a worn thread. She stumbles along the hallway, struggling with the doorknob before making it in. Beca rubs her temples with her fingertips, taking in the shower.

Stacie's picked up the caddy and its contents. Beca turns to the sink and kneels down, opening the storage space and peering into it.

 _"Why the hell are there so many bath bombs?" Beca feels like a bath bomb dealer. Chloe laughs._

 _"Different bombs for different moods, honey," she trails her hands across the lines of Beca's shoulders, running down and gripping her forearms._

 _"How many different moods could you possibly have?", Beca questions incredulously. She's about a hundred percent sure that Chloe's smirking._

 _"I could show you some moods." The words sink into Beca's skin, digging in like Chloe's nails on the soft skin of her inner arm. Teeth find her neck, nose nudging aside brown tresses and Beca's eyes flutter shut. Her breath whistles out of her when Chloe licks up the column of her neck, laughing in her ear like a thief in the night, sneakily stealing away her self-control. She nods against the head behind her, gripping a bath bomb in her fist._

 _"Glad you see it my way, baby."_

 _All she sees is how much enjoys doing these kinds of ridiculous things with Chloe._

There's some funny comparison here, about how the space underneath the sink is as empty as Beca's heart is right now. And even though it's funny, even though it's accurate, all it makes her want to do is scream. She wants to yell into it, filling it with her wailing, unadulterated and broken-hearted. Because everywhere that she looks, she finds no trace of Chloe.

There's nothing to indicate that she was ever here, but in every missing piece sits the shadow of all those things she never thought she treasured so deeply.

In the bath bombs. On the caddy, where Chloe's floral shampoo used to sit, right next to Beca's. In her kitchen, where Chloe's Bella alumni mug slept when it wasn't in use. The various foods missing from the refrigerator. In Beca's room, where it felt the most empty.

She stares at her reflection, studying the lingering marks from the accident.

There's a cut on the apple of her cheek that's almost completely healed.

 _Chloe's fingers skim over her cheek. They pinch quickly, like a rebellious crab, before scuttling away from the punishment of Beca's own hand dashing after it. Chloe's squeal as she flees the scene of the crime makes butterflies erupt in Beca's chest, fluttering rapid and excited wings as they soar._

She's got bruises in varying shades. On her arms, on the back and sides of her neck.

 _Chloe's face looks equal parts guilty and pleased. Beca tries not to smile as she looks at herself in the mirror._

 _"It seriously looks like I've been boxing with my neck," she observes humorously. "Like you straight punched me in the throat, dude." Her eyes stick to Chloe's pout beside her own reflection._

 _"Oopsies?" She's not remotely apologetic. Her mischievous baby-blues twinkle, errant stars streaking through the sky._

 _"Damn right, 'oopsies'." Beca turns, gripping the lip of the sink and leaning back on it, "how are you going to fix this? I've got a meeting tomorrow." Her eyebrow pops, challenging. Chloe leans into her space, arms bracing on either side of the brunette's._

 _"I'll make it_ _ **all**_ _better." It's more of a threat than a reassurance, teeth already grazing the column of Beca's throat as Chloe leans in. Beca chuckles._

 _"Sure you will."_

Stacie knocks on the bathroom door. Her voice comes through muffled.

"Beca? Are you okay in there?" Beca laughs harshly.

"Yeah. I'm great." _**Just dead inside.**_ She shakes her head and stands up. The taller woman's face is a picture of skepticism and concern as Beca opens the door. She brushes passed Stacie, heading into her room.

"I'm just a little bit lost, is all."

* * *

Stacie comes by when she can, but when she's not available, Beca isn't at the apartment. It's a game of hide-and-seek, where Beca's friends have no idea where she is and she leaves no clues as to where she might be. When Jesse gets back, he's quiet and they're both struggling. They're both trying to console the other and it's a hit-and-miss dance. It's like watching plants die in a time-lapse, and she's torn between caring more and wishing she could fall back into her coma.

Flo finds her once, when Beca's wandering around an empty park in the light rain. The Latin American woman jogs up to her, interrupting her own early morning run to ask her friend how she's doing. Beca wants to hug her, but instead she says she's busy and continues walking. After a few more attempts, Flo gets the message and squeezes Beca's arm before heading the other way, a verbal reminder of her love sticking to Beca's side for the rest of the walk like a heavy burr.

Beca tries not to feel the imprint of Chloe's hand right over where Flo's was.

She pulls a pill out of her pocket. It's one of her painkillers. Beca rubs over the surface of the tablet, trying to decide how badly her shoulder hurts.

 _"I hate not being able to feel anything," hushed, confessing her thoughts into Chloe's collarbone. She traces the ridge, listening to the even breathing of her unconscious lover. I hate not being able to feel_ _ **you**_ _." Beca presses a kiss to the downward curve of the bone where it begins to dip into the hollow, tasting the soft skin there. Chloe sighs, shifting and slipping her arm under Beca's, sliding over the brunette's waist and scratching up her spine._

 _She's still not awake._

Beca's walking around at night now, along a populated street. She doesn't even break her stride as she swallows the hydrocodone. She closes her eyes.

Not feeling anything right now would be wonderful.

* * *

"Well, looks like your shoulder is healing nicely." Beca snorts, because the rest of her is a constantly bleeding wound. "It's just about completely closed up," Dr. Gail praises her healing ability, plucking her gloves off after putting a much smaller bandage on. "You've been taking good care of it." She can't look at the doctor.

Stacie's been taking care of it. Cynthia Rose had made up the difference that couldn't be covered by Jesse. Beca? She's just been trying to blank out all of the pain.

The doctor shows her some stretches she can do in a few days in order to maintain full range of mobility, and Beca nods dutifully when she remembers that there's someone talking to her.

She leaves her appointment and heads over to TME. Every mile passed in the cab builds a small amount of dread within her, drop by drop, like piles of sulfur in the pit of her stomach. The large sign out front has never looked so menacing. She doesn't even make it beyond the door.

Beca stands, frozen to the spot, shocked out of breath and the sharp realization that Chloe isn't the only person that she's lost hits her hard.

Which, she already knew. But the grief of losing Chloe overshadowed everything else. And now she's here, remembering when Emily knocked them both over and that memory knocks the air out of her lungs. It knocks the tears out of her eyes and the strength out of her legs. She crumples to the floor, gripping the welcome mat like she was trying to hold onto Emily herself.

But just like everything that she treasured with Chloe, all traces of Emily slip through her grasp, like water through a sieve, sinking out of sight and reminding Beca that she's out of her mind.

She's sitting here, grieving the loss of people she's never met.

Cynthia Rose comes over, kneeling next to her and humming lowly, rubbing up and down the length of Beca's back after pulling her over to the side. Eventually, she convinces Beca to stand up and head to the back office, where she closes the door and leans against the edge of the desk. Beca sits in one of the chairs, staring at her hands and watching them collect her tears. Her crying is silent, and in the absence of her sound, Cynthia Rose fills it with singing.

It's something Beca's always appreciated about the woman. She was always making up songs, jotting things down in the notebook she kept behind the counter.

It really only makes Beca's silent tears fall faster, because there are so many memories of the two of them sitting with Emily and writing music.

 _"Emily," Cynthia Rose says kindly, like she's speaking to her child, "girl, no." Emily nods but her brow wrinkles._

 _"No like...?" Beca rolls her lips together, opening her water bottle to take a swig._

 _"Please. Don't release this song. Don't tell_ _ **anyone**_ _about this." Cee sounds grave. Beca wants to burst out laughing._

 _"I thought it could be a good song..." Bless Emily's heart._

 _"Your 'Flashlight' song was amazing," Cynthia Rose prefaces, "but this ain't close." She continues by explaining that a toothbrush just wasn't the same._

Beca laughs at the memory, resting her forehead on the edge of the desk. She drops her head to the side, gazing at Cynthia Rose's thighs.

 _Emily's sitting on Cee's lap, arms around her neck and they're singing Sia songs together on the couch. Beca quickly snaps a picture and saves it, grinning at Jesse when he does the same from a different angle. Bambi swings her legs up and down, like a little kid on a bench, giggling when she hits a note a bit flat. Cynthia Rose hums but doesn't bring more attention to the flub. Beca sighs happily._

"What's going on in your head, Beca?" Beca contemplates her answer.

"I honestly have no idea how to answer that," she says after a minute. And then, over the store's speakers, she hears the opening notes of David Guetta's 'Titanium' and it's too much.

 _"_ You shout it out, but I can't hear a word you say, _" Beca taps the floor with her foot, plucking the strings as she sings. "_ I'm talking loud, not saying much. _" Chloe's eyes watch her intently. "_ I'm criticized, but all your bullets ricochet. You shoot me down, but I get up. _" She nods for Chloe to join in._

 _It's a little embarrassing, how she misses a note, skipping over a string, but the redhead doesn't seem to care. And Beca's blown away by the clear voice in front of her, a soprano that sweeps her up in awe. She's not sure how she doesn't just drop the guitar._

"Beca?" Cynthia Rose places her hand on the back of Beca's head, softly stroking and Beca reaches up and grips her friend's wrist, crying through the song.

 _Beca flops down against the bed. She breathes heavily, resting her head in the crook of her arm. Chloe's got eyes like the galaxy, shining with a hundred million facets and their fingers try to bridge the space between them. Chloe's poking at her fingers, evading and teasing as Beca's follow, trying to link together and it reminds Beca of one of the paintings on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel. The Creation of Adam, where Beca's reaching out, trying to follow and Chloe's fingertips linger just out of reach, relaxed. When their fingers finally meet, Beca feels like she's surrounded by Glory, whatever that may be. It's light and warm, and maybe it's just another term for being next to Chloe. In the background, the last fading notes of 'Titanium' drift off before melding with the beginnings of another song._

 _"You're right, Chlo." The redhead's eyes sweep over her like a tickling caress and Beca feels her cheeks pull up in response. "That song really_ _ **does**_ _build." And it's a different song, with Chloe's influence on the atmosphere. Just like the whole world is different with her around._

 _Chloe's smile and laughter are the same shade of bright. They're both golden._

Cynthia Rose's nails scratch through her hair, combing gently. The song isn't playing that loudly, but Beca hears it like it's blaring. It's echoing in her head, building and building and images of every time she's heard this song flash at the same tempo. It's a deafening soundtrack to the real-life reel of her tortured crying. Her friend kneels in front of her, pulling Beca into her arms and rocking them until Beca's tears have calmed.

"I can't even explain it to you, Cee," she whimpers. "There's so much that's wrong, and I feel like I'm the only one that sees it." Cynthia Rose smells like bergamot and roses and Beca takes a deep breath, lungs stammering pitifully. Her head pounds from all the crying that never seems to stop.

"You don't have to explain it, Bec. You don't have to explain anything to me, or anyone else." Her voice is deep, calming and solid like a lone island in the midst of a foggy sea. Beca feels like she's flailing in the stormy ocean, lost and drowning and Cynthia Rose soothes the hurricane and calls Beca in with her words. She pulls Beca in, guiding the ship to dock and breathing is a little easier.

It's not much, but it's so much more than she can manage alone.

"Whatever you're feeling, you put it into music," she intones, patting down Beca's hair slowly, "you take all of your pain, and you explain it only to yourself." Everything hurts so much. "We're all here for you, but **you** have to find your reason. The only thing we can do is be the harmony to your melody, Beca." She kisses the top of Beca's head, resting her cheek there.

"Put it into music, and let it heal you."

* * *

 **AN: Thanks for reading, and thanks for sticking with this story. Thoughts?**


	17. Darkside

**AN: Lost part of this ch. in a computer crash, found myself saying "I literally can't even" aloud. Decided I needed to stop and re-evaluate what life choices led me to that moment. Came back, tried to salvage it. Still not completely satisfied, but who ever really is. Such is the life of anyone who creates anything, ever. All that being said, you guys have my gratitude.**

 **This chapter spans about 4 months after waking.**

 **Love,**

 **S.**

* * *

Beca sits in the storage room, organizing boxes at a sluggish pace. She's been spending more than half of her work hours in here cleaning, and Cynthia Rose had no qualms about it. Her intention was to hide from the memories as well as the customers. But there was nowhere that she could go that she would be safe.

 _"Shh, not too loud," Chloe warns, pressing tighter, and Beca whimpers._

 _"I'm trying." Lips curve against a shoulder, biting gently._

 _"Try harder." The encouragement comes with more aggressive hands, and laughter when weak knees tremble._

She shoves the small box farther into the shelf to make room for a few others, stacking them with very little focus aside from verifying the contents. Lilly's next to her, folded into one of the shelves. The contortionist watches her with no attempts at conversation. Beca's grateful for the silence, preferring to just wallow instead of talking about her feelings. Lilly asks no questions and it's exactly what Beca needs.

When she does say something though, Lilly also knows how to respond.

"Hey, Lills." The Asian woman blinks slowly, unmoving as she rests inside the shelf.

"I'm completely in love with someone who doesn't even fucking exist. Isn't that something?" Silence.

"The best part is that there are at least a thousand Chloe Beale's in the world, according to Stacie's name search. I can't afford a private investigator to find them all," she rubs her nose with the heel of her hand. "What if Chloe exists, but her name isn't Chloe?", Beca muses as she pushes boxes of sheet music with her foot. "How would I know? How would I even find someone that, more than likely, isn't real?" Tears sting at her eyes again, and she feels her breathing becoming wetter.

"Do you think I'm crazy?" Lilly meows. Beca laughs, wiping away stray tears.

"Is that a 'yes'? Because I feel like it is. I **feel** crazy these days." When she turns back to get more boxes from beside Lilly, the woman has unfolded herself and is standing next to Beca. She jumps back in surprise, but is engulfed in a hug before she gets too far.

"No," Lilly whispers against Beca's hair. "Not crazy. Not at all." She squeezes Beca more tightly when her friend begins to breathe harder. "Just in pain."

 _Chloe's fiddling with a butterfly knife, opening and closing it and trying to go through the motions with just a flick of her wrist._

 _"Where'd you get that?"_

 _"Lilly gave it to me yesterday. Something about being inducted?" The redhead snaps her wrist a bit too quickly and drops it. "I'm not really sure, honestly."_

There are only a handful of times that Lilly's ever spoken at a volume that anyone hears, and these words are barely audible. They only make it to Beca's ears because of their proximity. Beca raises her arms, hugging back and hiding her face.

"Thanks," she murmurs into black hair. Lilly nods.

 _"How'd you get in? I thought you locked yourself out?" Chloe's currently sitting in the car that she left her keys in, scrolling through her phone for music._

 _"Lilly." Beca gets into the passenger side._

 _"While that is all the explanation needed, I'm curious about how it happened." Chloe shrugs._

 _"She stared at the lock really hard and whispered something in Latin."_

 _Beca sits up a little straighter, suddenly concerned about the car becoming possessed._

The Asian woman departs when Beca asks for a few minutes alone, leaving the brunette in the storage room with her thoughts.

 _"You know, I think I actually miss this dusty room." Beca brushes her hand down the metal frame of the shelf. She can feel Chloe's smile on the other side, hidden by boxes as she rifles through the sheet music._

 _"Do you miss the room, or the memories?" The question is dripping with humor and Beca doesn't miss the suggestion in it. She moves to her lover._

 _"They're maybe one and the same," she responds as brushes up against Chloe from behind, palms sliding heavily down her back and curving over hips to wrap her up in a hug. The redhead sighs, head falling back to rest on Beca's shoulder and fingers gripping the box in front of her._

 _"Care to relive some of these memories?" It's just shy of a whine. " Maybe I can help?"_

 _Beca laughs quietly into Chloe's neck._

 _"I'm a stickler for detail," she warns. Chloe's hand sinks into Beca's hair, twisting and scratching._

 _"I'm sure you'll correct me if I get it wrong." She lives for moments like this._

 _"You haven't been wrong yet."_

From the far corner of the room, boxes begin to rattle slightly of their own accord. She's the only living person in the room, so Beca figures it's more than likely the ghost. The rustling gets louder, but she's just so tired. She's tired and in pain and not in the mood for any bullshit. When a box falls off of the shelf, Beca spins around and yells at the corner.

"Would you just **leave** me **alone**?!" The boxes stop rattling, leaving only silence ringing in her ears.

* * *

"This is a good movie," Jesse comments as he puts something on. Beca's eyes are on the TV, but they're unfocused. She feels like a mannequin laid against the couch, with no muscle control and no solid spine. He pushes the bowl of popcorn closer to her and sits down.

It's quiet and awkward, and between the sounds of an action movie, Beca's sniffles mix into the ambient noise. She can tell he's trying to find something to say. She is, too. She's not so far gone that she doesn't realize that his grandpa is dying. But "I'm sorry" is such small consolation. Beca puts the bowl on the table, burrowing under his arm and letting her tears soak into his shirt. He holds onto her, not saying anything as neither of them really watch the movie.

 _"What are you guys doing?"_

 _Jesse has Chloe thrown over his shoulder, loping around the living room as she beats her fists against his lower back. And it looks a bit like fighting, but they're both laughing loudly. Aubrey comes up beside her and hands her the second mug of coffee._

 _"We're fighting!", they both yell between giggles. "Winner gets the girls!" Beca cocks an eyebrow._

 _"I didn't realize we were prizes," she says to Aubrey._

 _"It's not like that!", Jesse assures them as he takes a knee to the stomach and drops Chloe, who quickly rolls away and snatches a pillow from the armchair to crack Jesse square in the face with. "Oomph!" He staggers to the side._

 _"Yeah! He just doesn't want to accept that_ _ **I**_ _love you both more!" Jesse's got Chloe backed towards the couch now, closing in on her with hands up like he's going to catch the redhead in a hug. When he lunges, she retreats, flipping sideways over the back of the couch, bracing with her shoulder as she rolls. Jesse collides with the cushions, grunting._

 _"That is a_ _ **lie**_ _!" It's muffled because his face is still in the couch._

 _Beca turns to Aubrey and they both roll their eyes._

 _"You two are ridiculous."_

"I wish everything wasn't so messed up, Jess." He nods above her, clearing his throat quietly and shifting his arm to squeeze.

She doesn't say anything either when she feels a tear dropping onto her cheek.

* * *

 _Chloe's laughing at a joke that Beca still doesn't get._

 _"That makes no sense," she points out. Amy snorts._

 _"Lack of required intellect, maybe," the blonde comments from the corner of her mouth. Beca glares at her._

 _"No. No, that's not it. You guys just have some whacked out sense of humor," Beca observes, nodding firmly. "I don't get how-" Amy interrupts her with another joke._

 _"Who gives alligators presents on Christmas?" Beca sighs._

 _"Santa Jaws!"_

 _Chloe's genuine laughter is louder than Beca's grunt._

"It's deceptively sunny today," Amy observes as she walks across the sand. Beca drags her feet behind her friend, sandals hooked on her fingers as she follows. "But there are plenty of choice cuts out." The blonde whistles when a shirtless guy walks by.

"I think it's always sunny in L.A., Amy." Amy hums dubiously.

"Suspicious, that." They settle under an umbrella that Amy convinces yet another shirtless man to set up. She stretches out on the blanket that Beca's spread, wiggling her fingers at some handsome men.

The blonde makes some casual comments about the beach crowd, ranking their hotness using a food scale that Beca doesn't understand. She's not sure if a steak is higher than pizza, and what's in the quesadilla? Were there any sides included in these meals, because she feels like that should affect where the meals ranked.

"Mmm, that's a cheesecake, right there," Amy bites her knuckle, raising her sunglasses to wink. Beca's sitting up, knees bent and building a sand pile because the sand here is too dry for any other structure.

"Yeah, that's great, Amy." They go through that routine a few more times before Amy touches Beca's knee. She turns to meet the blonde's eyes.

"Beca. I know I've already said that I'm sorry, but-" Beca waves it away.

"No. Don't apologize again, please."

Amy directs her gaze towards the ocean, allowing Beca the reprieve from eye contact that she wants but didn't ask for. "You're one of my best friends, yeah? And that means something. If I hadn't made you come with me-" Beca cuts her off again.

"You could have died alone, and that would have been worse." Amy shakes her head.

"No. I wouldn't have gone at all. I would have waited. I **should** have." Beca wipes her hands off.

"Amy. It was literally not your fault. You didn't make some asshole run a red light." The blonde fiddles with the wrinkles in the beach towel, pulling up individual loops of fiber.

"Ever since I first moved here, you've always been there for me." They both laugh. "Got a mean left hook. You're a right terror." Beca snorts.

"Half an hour after meeting and I got to jail because of you. You make an impression, that's for sure." She closes her eyes as Chloe whispers in her ear.

 _"You sure make quite the impression on a girl," the redhead breathes out as she leans against the wall of her bedroom. Beca smirks, nervous and excited, even after the moment._

 _"Gotta make sure you won't forget about me, Beale." Chloe's tinkling giggles reel Beca in like the world's most gullible fish. A finger curled into the collar of her shirt digs the hook further._

 _"How could I forget about someone like you?"_

Amy's looking away, not addressing Beca's crying. She puts her arm around the brunette, letting Beca get as much as she needs to out.

"I don't get it. I don't know if I can. But I'm here if you want to just forget about it all." Beca nods as she cries.

She can't decide if she wants to forget or not. She also can't decide if she wants to forget this world, or her coma.

* * *

"Alright, just stretch. That's right, arm up a little higher." Beca grunts. "How does that feel?" Her eyes narrow at the encouraging expression on the physical therapist's face. The man's brown eyes twinkle in a way that reminds her of Chloe, and it bugs her.

"Like shit. It hurts." She grunts again, trying to stretch more. She can barely raise her arm above shoulder height. "I hate this." The brunet nods.

"It'll get better. Just have to keep at it!" Ashton pumps a fist, smiling hugely and she's not in the mood for this enthusiasm.

 _"You just have to keep going, babe!" Chloe's jogging beside her, all sunshine smiles and heartthrob eyes as she sweats in a way that only beautiful people can. Beca knows that the redhead is running slowly for her, and it emphasizes how sloth-like she's being, when Chloe runs ahead and then back several times to keep her heart rate where it needs to be. Beca groans._

 _"Why do you do this to yourself? This is torture," she wheezes out. Chloe gives her a quick peck on the cheek, winking when Beca pulls her face away with a grimace. "Ew, Chloe! I'm sweating!"_

 _"What's wrong with that?" Beca's about to respond with a reason, but Chloe leans in again, licking up her neck and catching the brunette when she trips. "I love the way you taste," she murmurs salaciously, fingers skimming tightening biceps._

Beca shakes her head, dislodging the memory and pushing the muscles in her shoulder a bit more.

"You're doing really well. It's impressive how much you've progressed from the last time we met." She purses her lips as he stands a bit closer than he needs to, assisting her stretch by holding her hand.

"Yeah. Totes," she snarks. Beca seizes up, hand fisting and breath stopping. Tears spring forth, unbidden, and she pulls away from Ashton to move towards her things.

 _"Isn't this fun?" Beca huffs, sneakers hitting the pavement at the most even rate she can manage._

 _"Yeah._ _ **Totes**_ _fun." Her grumpiness only seems to make Chloe happier, and the redhead giggles. Beca rolls her eyes, a smile tugging her lips up even as she tries to frown._

"I think I've got the rest. I'll finish the stretches later." He follows her to her bag.

"I'm sorry, did I do something wrong?" His concern is genuine. He's lingering a yard away, hands out like he's waiting for her to fall. Beca sighs.

"No. I'm just- it's my own personal problems," she explains vaguely. "Thanks for today, Ashton. I'll see you next week." She tilts her head at him and leaves.

 _The rain is starting to fall a little harder now. It's dampening her shoulders and hair. Chloe jogs next to her, wholly unconcerned with the impending downpour. Beca squints her eyes up at the murky sky, dark and heavy with rain._

 _"We should probably head back soon," Beca advises. Chloe shrugs, smiling calmly._

 _"We'll be okay."_

 _Not even ten minutes after those words, the clouds open up and Beca finds herself drenched. She feels like she looks like a drowned rat. She feels like she_ _ **feels**_ _like a drowned rat. However they feel. Soggy. Waterlogged. More than_ _ **moist**_ _. Chloe laughs at her grimace._

 _"It's just a little rain," she yells above the downpour. And Beca wants to point out that it's a bit more than 'a little' if you have to raise your voice that much in order to be heard by someone right next to you, but she doesn't. She doesn't, because Chloe's eyes are bright. They're sparking like stray lightning and Beca's struck dumb. Her mouth opens but no words come out, and she runs that way for a few yards before it snaps shut and she shakes her head._

 _"You're crazy!", she yells back, heart booming in time to the peals of thunder as Chloe's giggles crack through her ribs. She's breathless and lightheaded, excited and just as nuts as she's accusing Chloe of being._

 _"Crazy about_ _ **you**_ _, babe!"_

 _Beca scoffs and wonders if her blush is visible in the storm._

* * *

"I just closed a huge deal this week. Think I'll treat myself to a holiday." Beca grunts in what she feels like is a very obvious display of disinterest, but the suited gorilla in front of her doesn't seem to clue in. Instead, he makes a show of checking his Rolex before laughing loudly and clinking his beer against hers on the table. It almost tips over, and she has to lunge to stabilize it.

"That's fan-freaking-tastic, dude," she snipes. "I'm totally impressed. Way swayed, weak in the knees and honestly swooning." When he winks at her, she drains her beer and starts on the new one next to her.

"Maybe I'll take a lucky lady with me?" He's trying to wink again, and if she was being honest, she'd say that he's not half-bad at it. But she's so incredibly biased and completely unflattered, so she just snorts as unattractively as possible. She rolls her eyes for good measure.

"Good luck, pal." He leans over the table.

"Want to be that girl?" Flo walks by, draping her arm over Beca's shoulder.

"She's not interested, thank you." Beca drinks the rest of her bottle as Flo stares the man down, smiling and narrowing her eyes. When he leaves, she shakes Beca's shoulders lightly. "You okay?" Beca sighs.

"I'm only refraining from pouring drinks because this is Ashley's bar." Flo laughs, dropping a kiss on Beca's cheek.

"I'll try to steer people away from you." Beca nods her appreciation and smiles when she gets another beer. "And maybe try not to drink so much," Flo adds. Beca just takes a swig.

She's been spending a lot of time here when she's not at work. The apartment is nearly inhospitable.

Not in terms of its actual physical state, but the sheer amount of memories are suffocating her. It feels like she's sinking into a nightmare every time she remembers something, and it's not unlike her hallucinations. Just like those, nobody else can see them. Nobody else remembers what goes on in them.

Beca empties her bottle in record time.

* * *

"I really don't want to do this," Beca grumbles. Stacie pushes on her lower back, herding the shorter brunette towards the front door of the building.

"You need to talk to **someone** , Becs. Sometimes it helps to talk to a person you don't know." Beca sighs heavily.

"I don't want to talk to a shrink." Stacie hums, opening the door and shoving Beca inside before following. Beca drags her feet to the front desk.

"Hello, my friend here has an appointment." Stacie leans over the desk, perching herself and her assets within optimal ogling view of the secretary. The man's jaw drops, eyes very obviously stuck in cleavage. Beca groans.

"Stace. Why." She isn't even asking, because there are no answers aside from "He's a hunter, Beca" and she is too far along in their friendship to question it anymore.

Stacie waits with her, even following Beca to the restroom to ensure she doesn't escape. Beca complains loudly. When it's finally her turn to go in, Stacie departs with a big hug and some well-wishes.

"Come on in. Just sit down, I'll be with you in a minute." Beca plops herself down on the corner seat of the couch. Her pain medication is just barely starting to kick in, and it's making the edges of her vision a little fuzzy. She takes a deep breath, letting it drift out slowly as she hears the creaking of a leather chair. Eyes shut, she just listens as the therapist settles herself. "So," there's a pause, where the woman is probably scanning over the basic file, "Beca. Why are you here today?" Beca slouches against the couch.

"Why is anyone ever here?" She's being rhetorical. "Why is anyone ever anywhere at all?" The woman doesn't say anything, and that makes Beca open her eyes. They widen at the sight.

Sitting in front of her is the same therapist from her coma.

"Very deep questions. I'm Dr. DeBolt," she smiles genially, placidly, like a smooth lake on a windless day. Her wavy brown hair falls off of her shoulder as she nods her head. "But you may call me Barbara." Beca wants to ask if she's allowed to call the woman 'Barb' again. "I heard from the front desk that some concerned friends of yours suggested you come here today?"

"You heard correctly," she mumbles, still staring at Dr. DeBolt and considering what this might mean. She even had the same name.

"Why do your friends think you should be here?" Beca's eyes glaze over as she stares out the window.

"Because I fell in love, and then I woke up."

* * *

She stares at the little glasses in front of her. The clear liquid inside ripples as she taps the table.

Six.

 _Chloe's still fiddling with the ring, giggling over it before flicking potent eyes back to Beca. The brunette continues trying to work as her heart stammers._

 _"Bec." Click, open program._

 _"Beca." Click, open music file for Cassie's new single._

 _"Baby." Click, move the layers around. The screen of her laptop is pushed down partially. Fingers catch on the line of her jaw and angle her head upward. She smiles at the teeth nipping her throat. Can feel the elation in the action and how the redhead's just barely holding herself back. "I'm talking to you, y'know." Beca chuckles._

 _"Sorry, not listening." Her breath stutters as Chloe bites a littler harder._

 _"I guess I can work with this, too..."_

 _Beca closes the screen all the way._

Beca picks up the first shot glass, barely reacting as it burns her esophagus.

Five.

 _"Can we really get a dog?" Beca stretches on the couch, watching Chloe making snacks with Aubrey in their kitchen._

 _"What kind of dog do you want?" She bends her legs at the knee to make space for the redhead and her bowl of fruit._

 _"The kind that will love you as much as I do." Her mouth's already open, so Chloe just puts a piece of strawberry between her teeth._

 _And it's cheesy, but she can't help but think that nothing's as sweet as Chloe._

She's not sure if it burns more or less than the first.

Four.

 _"What do you mean?" Dr. DeBolt fiddles with her pen._

 _"We develop many different kinds of coping mechanisms. To deal with both life and death." She watches Barbara twirling the silver pen in her hands expertly. "It's entirely possible that your mind created this alternate universe because it thought that you were going to die. Just like to how the body floods itself with chemicals to reduce the pain." Beca sits up._

 _"What?"_

Someone approaches her with more. Beca isn't looking, so she doesn't know who.

She takes the next two with no hesitation in between.

 _"Similarly to how people describe seeing visions of Heaven before passing." She understands, but she doesn't._

 _"I heard you." Dr. DeBolt's trying to salvage the wreck, but all Beca sees around her are the specters of a life unlived. "I just don't know how to accept that."_

 _"Well, that's what we're here to work on," Barbara says encouragingly, smiling softly. "All we have to do is take it one day at a time."_

"Hey there, want some company?" Beca looks up, sipping slowly on the last shot and letting it burn.

He's got a nice smile and eyes like a clear sky. Dark brown hair and broad shoulders. She shrugs. "Not really."

"What's your name?" She ignores his question as he pushes a shot glass towards her. This is stronger, and her breath hisses out of her in her exhale.

"Does it matter?" He seems surprised, but just smirks.

"Guess not." He sits down on the stool next to her.

 _"For_ _ **all**_ _of the times you call_ _ **me**_ _a brat, you are_ _ **no**_ _better," Beca mutters frostily, wiping her face off. Chloe looks apologetic, but the impish glint shines brighter in her reflection. "Don't even try to hide how funny you think this is."_

 _Chloe's there, warm palm on the center of Beca's back as the brunette slips her shirt off. She's going to have to wash her hair._

 _"I didn't think it would explode so... messily," Chloe twists her lips to the side._

 _"No more soda, I get it." The redhead wilts a little, and Beca sighs. The things she does for love. "If you wanted to get me wet, there are other ways, Chlo." She turns around to a beaming smile and Chloe fiddling with the top button of her own shirt._

 _Beca hides her grin as she watches her girlfriend turn the shower on._

"Damn, girl. You sure can drink." She swallows the next one, feeling on the verge of tears and she's hoping that maybe if she replaces the water in her body with alcohol she won't actually be able to cry. "Want to slow down?" She shakes her head.

"Want to head out, then?" Beca laughs at him, eyeing him warily.

"I'm not someone you want to sleep with," she states, throwing another one back. He leans forward, crossing his arms on the table.

"Hey, I'm not looking for permanence. No names, no baggage. Nothing to complicate what could be just a fun night." Beca chokes on her shot.

"I am the absolute opposite of everything you're looking for, dude."

 _"I think you got soda on your pants, too." Beca's breath bursts from her in a laugh._

 _"Yeah?" Chloe's biting her lip, barely pinning her smile down._

 _"Yep." The redhead's slowly unfastening Beca's jeans, eyes racing between the brunette's and what she's doing. "Better get out of these, too." Beca shakes her head, chuckling._

 _"You're about as subtle as a sledgehammer, Baby." Chloe doesn't care._

 _"Is it working against me?" Beca puts her hands on Chloe's shoulders to step out of her jeans._

 _"Why don't you see for yourself?"_

Ashley's standing next to her, saying something to the man, but she doesn't hear any of it. There's a woman across the bar with red hair, back to her, and Beca's out of her seat before her friend is finished scooting the man away.

 _Chloe pulls her closer by the waistband of her underwear, fingers sliding along the lace._

 _"You're so bad."_

Red hair sways with the shifting of shoulders. Beca thinks she's laughing. The brunette stumbles a little against an empty chair.

 _"Is it working against me?" Chloe laughs into her neck, gripping her hips and shaking her head. She goes tit for tat._

 _"Why don't you see for yourself?"_

The woman's wearing a single-shoulder cream-colored dress that looks a bit too nice for just a night at the bar. She laughs again, and Beca's just out of earshot.

 _Beca's plucking the buttons of the redhead's blouse from the top down, maintaining eye contact, and they giggle like teenagers._

She's holding a drink, standing with a group of friends. Beca doesn't recognize any of them.

 _Chloe's shirt falls to the floor with a rustle that isn't heard over the running shower. Beca traces above the cutoff of the bra, pad of her index finger just barely grazing skin. She's not touching the fabric of the garment, but everything under her finger feels like silk. The redhead's watching her with a hooded gaze, eyes a darker blue._

Beca's about ten feet away now.

 _"I love you." She kisses the swell of a breast, lingering over Chloe's heart. Hands brush up her back, pulling her in at the blades of her shoulders._

 _"I love you, Beca."_

The woman turns at the touch of Beca's hand on her upper arm.

 _"I could kiss you forever," she whispers against Chloe's lips._

Her eyes are brown.

"I'm sorry, do I know you?" She's not being rude, just confused.

Probably as confused as Beca.

"No, sorry. I just thought you were someone else."

 _"Only me?"_

The woman nods and smiles, looking at Beca a bit more substantially. She turns fully around.

"Want to get to know each other?"

 _"Always you."_

She shakes her head, laughing bitterly. Her tone sets the woman on edge, and the redhead's face closes slightly.

"I don't even know who **I** am, anymore."

* * *

Beca knocks on the door, head rested on the wall beside it. She's not sure if she'll be allowed in. She doesn't even live here. The door cracks open, and she enters.

"Thank you, for letting me in," she bows her head, wringing her hands together as she walks farther into the living room. "You're so kind." She sits down on the brown couch.

"You hungry?" Beca puts her head in her hands.

"No, thank you." A hand lands heavily on her shoulder. She looks up into the face of the old woman who lives in Chloe's apartment. "Thank you, Grandma." The woman nods, before pointing to Chloe's room. Beca swallows painfully.

"No, I can't. Not again," she pats the couch beneath her, "I'll just sleep here tonight." The words are barely out of her mouth before the old woman is reprimanding her in her language. She switches to her broken English.

"You guest. This, my home. You, go." She points again at the closed door, to a room that Beca knows is occupied. "I tell my granddaughter sleep here." And she's pushing and pulling Beca in a way that she can't actually stop without potentially hurting the old woman. The door is opened from the outside after two quick knocks. She's yanked in and stands awkwardly in the center of the room. The woman looks at the occupant of the desk chair.

"Kimmy," Grandmother switches to Korean, probably ordering her granddaughter to the couch, judging from the tone and responding sulk. The old woman leaves, patting Beca on the back. She rubs over the back of her neck.

"I'm sor-" Kimmy Jin cuts her off, standing up abruptly and sighing harshly. She rifles through her dresser before tossing clothing at Beca and leaving with a slam. Beca frowns as she hears Kimmy Jin's grandmother yelling at her.

Getting dressed slowly, she can't help the couple of tears that escape. She could barely stand to be in her apartment during the day, but the nights were worse.

She just couldn't seem to get Chloe out of her mind and her heart. Every week that passed felt worse, like an iron statue, rusting slowly in the rain and flaking away. Every memory that brushed over her removed details on the sculpture like a broom over sand. She feels like it's all scratching at her, wearing her down to an unrecognizable mass. Beca sits down on the bed, pulling at her hair and trying her hardest to sob quietly.

She hates that she's disturbing other people's lives.

But every moment affects multiple people. Every ripple moves over an entire lake.

She hates that she's dragging everyone else down.

* * *

 _"Kiss me harder," Chloe begs against her mouth, breathing hotly as she writhes underneath her lover. Beca's eyes flutter, rolling a little as the redhead's tone sinks into her gut. "Please, baby." It's like burning coals, melting in where they land, singeing and scarring._

 _And if her voice is like coals, then her body is like lava._

 _It's all hot, searing as Beca slips her hands over and into Chloe. She breaks out of the kiss, whining into Chloe's neck as she feels slick heat. It's almost too much._

 _Too much, and not enough._

 _Chloe's whimpering, nearly crying, bucking against a woman who can hardly keep herself together because the air is so stifling that she can barely breathe. But it's stifling in a good way. It's thick with the weight of their emotions, full of 'I love you's and 'forever's and 'always's, floating in the atmosphere like fireflies on a summer night. Chloe's almost crying, and Beca's tears are leaking onto the redhead's neck as she feels Chloe coming undone beneath her. Feels her tensing. Hears her gasping. It sounds like the roaring of flames eating up all of the oxygen in the room. It sounds like Sol, flaring brightly and intensely under Beca's hands._

 _And yeah, Beca's never actually been on fire before. But being with Chloe?_

 _It sure feels like she's burning up in the sky, trying to touch the Sun._

Beca sits up under the blanket, wiping the tears from her face as she tries not too see how this room looked when Chloe lived in it.

* * *

 _Chloe's a natural dancer._

 _There are some people who need to learn. They have to learn through persistence. That's Beca. She's about as flexible as a steel beam. Set in concrete. And frozen. So her skills have all been acquired through trial and error and trial by friendly fire._

 _Chloe's water._

 _Chloe flows with the energy of the room. She's the embodiment of freedom. Chloe makes a twist of the head or the angling of a wrist look artful and majestic and beautiful in a manner that is truthfully unfair to everyone else. Hips slant and slide and arms move in graceful curves as the redhead follows Flo's lead._

 _Beca's watching the Latina teach Chloe how to samba. Flo's talking about the time that she was accidentally sent to the Amazon and how the Brazilians in a jungle village taught her the dance, as well as how to extract snake venom. It's all wild and completely like her, and Beca smiles softly at Flo's in-depth description of coating poison arrows with the excretions of tiny red frogs so small you'd mistake them for jelly beans. They move around the empty bar, dancing as the early afternoon sun filters in through the slats in the wooden blinds on the far side of the room._

 _Flo's head drops back as she laughs at something Chloe said, and they stumble over a step in the dance. Beca sips her drink, cutting limes and lemons slowly on a cutting board behind the bar._

 _"They're both such amazing dancers," Ashley sighs, "it's mesmerizing."_

 _Beca hums, putting the fruits into their rectangular metal containers for tonight._

Beca gasps, stumbling along after Flo. Her friend looks back from her spot a few yards ahead. Beca shakes her head and waves her on. Her sneakers hit the pavement erratically.

 _Chloe slowly steps forward, knees bent and steps light, sweeping up a corresponding bent arm, hand fisted. Beca watches her going through the motions before she repeats the maneuver quickly. The redhead sidesteps her imaginary adversary, locking the invisible joints of her opponent and striking with her elbow at what should be someone's chin. Beca leans forward on the grass, grabbing her foot and pulling her back into a stretch._

Beca coughs. She sounds like a smoker.

Is this how she was before she met Chloe? Beca turns her face and spits into the grass. Her throat is clogged with excess phlegm, dredged up from the exertions of an unhealthy body.

"Are you okay?" Flo's walking backwards, two fingers pressed to her pulse. Beca nods, jogging to catch up to the Latina.

"Yeah. I'm just," _**heartbroken**_ , "out of shape." Flo bobs her head.

"When I first started, I was pretty bad. It gets better." Beca whimpers out a tiny laugh, pressing her eyelids together and cursing the single tear that makes its way out of the inner corner of her eye.

"Does it?"

 _"You're a champ!" Emily's enthusiasm soaks the air around them. She's cheering like a bubbly Sun, Jr., still learning how to moderate her sunbeams as they blast in Beca's haggard face at full force. "Just keep truckin'!"_

 _"I feel like my feet are going to fall off," she complains, "and my lungs are going to explode." Emily encouragingly slaps Beca's back with a sharp smack, tittering like a child and racing off when the shorter brunette tries to catch her. "Get back here!" A quiet, breathy laugh sounds from beside her._

 _Chloe's jogging with them, observing with fond eyes._

 _"You guys are so cute," she reaches over and tries to pinch Beca's cheek, but the brunette lurches away, glowering._

 _"That's blasphemous," she reprimands. Chloe's eyes skitter quickly to the side before coming back. When Beca turns, she's greeted with a faceful of water, courtesy of Emily's water bottle. "Emily!" Emily squirts her again._

 _Bambi's full-on cackling, barely breathing, gasping as she runs just out of Beca's reach._

"It does," Flo promises, "It feels like it's impossible in the beginning, like no matter how much you run, it'll never get easier. But one day, you'll look back and think, 'wow, at one point, I couldn't even run a mile'."

 _"You're_ _ **dead**_ _!", she swears, sprinting after the tall brunette. But all of the youthful energy that powers Emily makes her unable to be caught, and she's_ _ **skipping**_ _as she evades Beca and her clawed fingers. Beca's face is dripping with a mix of sweat and water and probably the fury leaking from her eyes. She makes a jump that she really doesn't judge the details of, things like trajectory or required input, and she gets just far enough to grab onto the end of Bambi's shirt with her off-kilter leap. Emily stumbles from the unexpected anchor, and they go off the asphalt and into the grass. Beca braces her hands on either side of Emily's head, breathingly heavily from the exertion. "Say your prayers."_

 _But Emily's face is full of sunshine, innocently pure yet mischievous and nervously open to a punishment she knows she deserves. And Beca claims that she's gone soft in her old age, or maybe Emily's eyes are too doe-like when she simply messes up her ponytail and pushes the younger brunette's cheek into the grass._

 _Emily just kisses her cheek and springs back up like a wind-up toy, bouncing away with a happy little "love ya, Bec!" and a mane full of grass._

Beca wonders how far she'll have to run in order to escape her thoughts.

* * *

 _"You've never played patty cake with three people before?"_

 _Really, she's never played this game with the minimum of required people. But Jessica and Chloe are playing, and Beca had to ask. So here she is. She's pulled down into a sitting position, completing a triangle between the three women, and they're running through the hand movements._

 _"You're terrible at this," Chloe states unforgivingly._

 _"We can get it. We just need to practice a bit more." Jessica's much kinder. Beca blows out a puff of air, shifting her locks._

 _"This is dumb. Can't I just go back to watching?"_

 _She can't._

 _"Ow! Chloe!" Beca rubs at her wrist._

 _"You keep missing!"_

 _"I am not! You're just too aggressive!" It's really just her displacing the blame, because she's honestly bad and she's missing the slaps on both sides. It's messy and she keeps getting hit on the wrists and forearms. Chloe smacks her knee._

 _"I'll show_ _ **you**_ _aggressive," the redhead threatens with a serious face. But Beca's mind is occasionally a trashcan, and she ends up cocking an eyebrow. The smirk that sneaks its way onto her face is completely out of her control. "Not like_ _ **that**_ _." Though, Chloe ends up fighting her own smile. Jessica laughs, rolling a bit to stretch her legs and get up._

 _"That is definitely my cue to be anywhere else," the blonde comments with a chuckle. "Somewhere far away." Chloe grabs Jessica's hand._

 _"No, don't leave," she whines. The blonde shakes her head._

 _"I love you guys, but I'd rather not be here when you two start looking at each other like that." Beca grins._

 _"Gonna go stare at Ash?" They all laugh as Jessica blushes._

 _"Maybe."_

Beca opens the door to her apartment, stumbling in and wiping the sweat from her face with her shirt. Everywhere she goes, memories slink behind, lurking in every corner and scraping dead fingers over her back. Her steps fall like lead weights, taking her closer to the bathroom she's come to hate. She hates everything about this apartment.

The kitchen that Chloe and Aubrey would commandeer to make breakfast or lunch or dinner, or whatever they felt like they wanted to do, poking fun at Beca's general laziness concerning cooking.

The living room, where Chloe would coerce her into watching movies with everyone, dragging heavy hands over the brunette's neck and shoulders and whispering sweet nothings into her ear.

She hates the walls of the hallway that they'd both been pinned up against.

She hates her bedroom. Every inch. The sheets, the mattress, her desk chair. She hates the closet and the door.

The bathroom, with all of its good and bad memories, all of its missing bath bombs and shampoos and all of the echoing sighs. Beca's headed to it now, pausing in the doorway of her bedroom when Jesse steps out of his. They stare at each other for a few seconds, and the weight of the silence makes her brain hurt. She tilts her head.

"Hey, Jess." She tries to move passed him when he moves into the hallway but his hand comes up to grasp her shoulder. "What's up?"

He looks at her for a moment, quiet and somber. "Bec."

"Yeah?" She tosses her towel over her other shoulder.

"Why won't you talk to me?" She shrugs.

"Not much to say." She shifts, "I mean, I'm sorry about Papa Swanson." She doesn't say anything else, anything crass. Jesse sighs, scratching the crown of his head.

"No, that's not what I mean. What's going on with you? Come on, talk to me," he tries to reach for her hand, but she evades him, moving into the wall and turning her head away.

"I really don't want to talk about it." Because everything she's upset about is a figment of her imagination, and that thought makes her want to jump off of a cliff.

"Can you just try, please?", he pleads frustratedly. "Anything at all. What's going on in your head?"

"Nothing!" _**Everything.**_ "I'm fine." She tries again to move passed him, but he presses a hand into the wall, leaning down and using the other hand to grip his hair.

"You're not okay!" She rolls her eyes.

"I'm seeing a **shrink** , so obviously I'm not completely fine. But don't worry about it," she ducks under his outstretched arm, "besides, Chloe's not real, remember?", she snarks. She's not sure who she's telling. Jesse turns to follow.

"Beca! We're not kids anymore. Talk to me."

 _"You won't talk to me about something that is hurting you and_ _ **that hurts me too**_ _."_

Jesse's eyes are wet, rimmed red and his face is marred with stress lines. As her eyes trace over his features, she can see the ghost of Chloe in the background, kneeling and crying, begging for Beca to come back, to just **talk**.

 _"You haven't been sleeping well," Chloe notes, studying the forming dark circles. Beca shrugs._

 _"Just too busy too sleep," she jokes. "Gotta make that cash money." She immediately cringes._

She goes back into her room, grabbing her backpack and shoving things into it.

"Where are you going?"

 _"Do you actually sleep?" Beca's eyes drift closed as Chloe skims her finger along the bridge of the brunette's nose._

 _"Yeah, I do. Always best when I'm with you." She distracts Chloe, climbing on top of her girlfriend and kissing her soundly._

"Out. I just need to clear my head." Jesse sighs heavily.

"You're just avoiding talking to me." Beca zips up the backpack.

"Kinda. It's hard to talk to someone who doesn't believe what I'm going through." Jesse wrings his hair.

"Beca! I didn't know! I don't **understand**! I need you to **talk** to me!" He's following her, trying to reason, reminding her that they've grown up together. That they're 'Bec and Jess', wild rebels that trekked across the country with absolutely no ideas in their heads but hearts full of dreams. But she's not looking for reason.

She just wants to escape.

Because Chloe's voice is ringing in her ears, echoing Jesse's sentiments and all that Beca can see is the way the redhead's eyes would dim every time that she deflected Chloe's questions about why she wasn't sleeping.

* * *

When she steps out of the bathroom, she's met with the scowling face of Kimmy Jin. The woman's leaning against the opposite wall, arms crossed. Beca bows her head lightly as the steam drifts from behind her.

"H-" The Korean woman scoffs.

"Don't you have an actual home or anything?" Beca's neutral face slips into a frown.

"Sorry." She heads back to Kimmy Jin's room and puts her things into her backpack.

"Sorry? For what," she's leaning by the door now, watching Beca pack. "Sorry for kicking me out of my own room? Which I pay rent for, by the way. For coming and going as you please into a stranger's home? Sorry for fooling my grandma into doting over you? For mooching off of us?" Kimmy Jin straightens up. "What exactly are you sorry for?" Beca's head dips lower and tears drip onto the backs of her hands.

"I'm sorry for everything," she says as she zips up her pack, jerking it when it gets caught midway through. Kimmy Jin's eyes narrow as Beca stands up to leave.

"Doesn't anybody want you?" She walks a little faster.

 _Her heart hurts._

 _Chloe's walking something that looks like a dapper mop (it's wearing a bow tie collar) across the grassy fenced area outside of the rescue. Beca's only acknowledging it as a dog because it has a wagging tail. But the woman she's in love with seems to have found a new love._

 _Really, Chloe's in love with all of the animals._ _ **All**_ _of them._

 _"Bec! Bec! Beca! Baby!" The call is rapid-fire. It's almost painfully cute, how excited Chloe is. Beca laughs from her corner of the grass._

 _"Hey." And instead of answering, Chloe's eyes shine like focused beams of light. "Wow." She blinks a few times before sniffing. "So? Anyone you want?"_

 _She watches Chloe's smile grow tenfold, eyes crinkling at the corners and the redhead tries pointlessly to bite her bottom lip. But it's far out of reach, and she ends up giggling before shaking her head._

 _"Beca." Chloe and the mop approach, and fiery red hair bounces like a shampoo commercial. It's just unfair, the way her hair is so_ _ **perfect**_ _. Chloe stands in front of her, looking the brunette up and down with a kind of slow weightiness that Beca feels inside. A tug on the waist of her skinny jeans also tugs her back into the moment. "Sweetheart."_

 _"Yeah?" The mop is sniffing her feet, licking at her shoes and panting._

 _"There_ _ **is**_ _someone I want," Chloe starts, bringing her entire body closer to press into Beca, and she purrs a sultry "it's_ _ **you**_ _." Beca opens her mouth, but Chloe continues. "I will_ _ **always**_ _want you."_

 _Beca barely registers the mop pawing at her thigh._

Her tears are blurring her vision, and she almost walks into Kimmy Jin's grandmother. Beca bows again, hiding her tears behind a curtain of hair.

"Thank you for letting me take a shower here. I'll be going now." Grandmother's stern face softens as she spots the tears, and she grabs Beca's bag.

"No. You stay. Sleep," she lightly commands, but Beca shakes her head. Before she can say anything, Grandmother notices Kimmy Jin over her shoulder. She side skirts Beca to confront her granddaughter. As they argue in their language, Beca decides to just leave her bag.

She slips out unnoticed. Loud arguing follows her down the hallway.

* * *

She walks the familiar bike path in the dark. It's just outside of the 'tent city' where the homeless have their shelters set up.

It's not that late, but the mid-Spring Sun has almost finished setting. She can hear the conversations from the people in the tent city. They're muted at this distance, as is the light from their fires. Beca scuffs her shoes as she aimlessly treads the path.

"Why am I even still alive?" She's not sure who she's asking. "Why didn't I just stay in the coma?" Her tears drop a little faster.

"I don't understand why. Why?" She rakes her hand through her hair, scratching and fisting in frustration and confusion. A body presses into her back, and she gasps into a memory.

 _"Don't move." Chloe's body is plastered to her back, trapping the brunette between her body and the counter. Beca smiles when she feels hands roaming up and down her sides, mapping indolently._

 _"Hey, Cutie, I'm trying to clean here." The admonition has no heat behind it. Contrary to everything about Chloe._

 _"I wanna get dirty." Her girlfriend presses her into the counter and snakes reckless hands up her shirt and into her shorts. Beca's breath leaves her in a rush when Chloe squeezes her breast none too gently._

 _"Babe, what are you doing?" There's an airy quality to her voice, tinted with quickly waking arousal. Chloe hums quietly into the side of Beca's head, nuzzling into hair secured in a ponytail._

 _"I thought that it was pretty obvious, Becs." She laughs, because she wasn't question what Chloe's literally doing. And Chloe knows that._

 _"Aubrey is right over there," she warns. The blonde is tidying up the bathroom, singing with the door open. Chloe nods, nose still buried in hair and hands still working. When the redhead's right hand moves out of her shorts only to slide back down under the barrier of her underwear, she jerks and grips the rag in her hand tightly. "Chloe." It's a barely-there groan._

 _"Shh. Aubrey's right there," Chloe mocks with a smile, biting Beca's ear when she tries to turn her head. The hand below rubs harder, sinking lower, and Beca braces on the counter with her forearm._

 _"If she catches us-" She's completely breathless, and so the words are rather wispy. The lack of conviction only fuels Chloe, and Beca whimpers against her will._

 _"She won't," Chloe reassures, "or she will. Either way, I don't care." Chloe's almost bent over the counter with her in a way that makes Beca sure that the redhead's going to have a pretty solid indent on her arm. "I don't care. I love you. I want you," she whispers furiously._

"Don't move."

The voice is low, male. Hands grab her upper arms. Beca struggles against the the restraint, heart pounding loudly.

"What the-" The person shakes her roughly. His hands are so much bigger than hers and they wrap over themselves on her arms.

"I said **don't move**!", the man orders.

"What do you want?" She tries to pull her left arm out but his hold is tight.

"Give me everything you've got." She laughs derisively.

"I don't **have** anything." She means money, but finds herself wondering if she's not also talking about her sanity.

"Yeah, right. Empty your pockets," he releases one of her arms before waving his knife within her eyesight.

 _"Oh God. I love you, too," she moans quietly, breathing as evenly as possible. She feels herself winding up, getting closer and closer._

"See? Nothing." Her pockets are inverted, but the man is patting her down, still searching for something. "Can I go now?" The man is growling now.

"No! I need money!" He pushes her shoulder to turn her around, looking in vain. She can't make out what he looks like in the dark. "Give it to me!" Beca takes a few quick steps back, spinning to run. "Get back here!" His steps pound behind her. She stumbles before regaining her footing and sprinting. Loose pieces of the path roll under her feet, flying behind her as she runs. The man growls, feet falling heavily as he chases. "Come **here**!"

 _"Come, Baby. Come for me," Chloe urges, panting in her ear and whimpering along with Beca's hitched cries. "I love you. I love you so much."_

Her throat is clogging up again and she's still sore from trying to run earlier with Flo. Her breaths come in heavy gasps. The man's getting closer, footfalls loud and menacing. She screams when his fingers grip her wrist. He yanks her back and to the ground.

At the violent jerk, Beca's head hits the pavement with a slam and her vision swims. He's shaking her, yelling, and she's having trouble making out his words. He's sitting above her, covered in shadow.

"Why did you run?!", he yells. His breathing is erratic. His weight bears down on her, making her body dig into the ground uncomfortably. "You made me catch you!"

 _Beca comes with a breath that's broken over Chloe's name, shuddering through the waves as Chloe braces her on the counter. Soft kisses are dripped up and down the column of her neck._

 _"That's it, Baby. Let go." Beca drops the rag she'd forgotten she was holding. "I'll always catch you."_

 _"Are you guys cleaning the kitchen?" Aubrey's voice cuts into the moment like a hot knife._

 _She laughs breathily._

Beca's crying harder now, sobbing openly. The man gets off of her, presumably to leave or grab the knife he'd lost when he'd taken her to the ground. Something inside of her snaps at the careless way he's moving. Like he really doesn't give a shit.

"Whatever. You're worthless." The words tear at her.

 _"Doesn't anybody want you?"_

Beca screams.

She rolls to her feet, tackling the man before he can grab his knife. Taken off guard, he scrapes his arm along the pavement and Beca wraps her hands around his throat. He claws at her arms and face, pushes at her shoulders and tries to buck her off. But she tightens her grip, pressing her fingers deeper until she can't depress the muscles in his neck any farther. The only sounds in the quiet night are her cries and the man's choking. She can't even see anymore, she's crying so hard.

Tears drip down her cheeks, off of the tip of her nose, falling down and splashing him.

"Why?!", she screams at him. "Why am I alive?!" She picks him up by his throat and slams him back down. He really isn't as big as she initially thought.

"Why didn't I just **die**?!" He slaps at her weakly, feeling around with his other hand for a knife that isn't anywhere close. Beca shakes him against the ground, growling into a wordless yell. She squeezes harder.

 _"So, who's that lady that you call and talk to in Spanish?" Beca's focus is on Chloe's nails, running the brush with careful precision over the redhead's index finger. Chloe's color of choice is a kind of neon orange that would look terrible on anyone else._

 _"The woman that helped raise me. She was my neighbor and occasionally my nanny," Chloe informs her, eyes also on Beca's work. Her hand is resting on her upper calf as she lounges on the bed, back rested against the wall. "She always gave me these candies that look like strawberries." She wrinkles her nose, "well, the wrapper looked like a strawberry. The inside was just a red oval." Beca's head pops up._

 _"My grandma had those, too!", she exclaims, to Chloe's delight. The redhead sits up a bit._

 _"No way?!" Beca nods, moving the brush away to avoid collateral damage._

 _"Yeah! I can never find them anywhere, but she always had a bowl of them!" Chloe laughs a little, shaking her head._

 _"Old people and their mysteries. I hope we're that cool when we're old, Becs." Beca resumes her work, cradling Chloe's hand gently._

 _"You're the kind of woman that only gets better with age," she comments blithely. Above her, the redhead stills. Beca glances up._

 _Chloe's biting her lip, looking shy and jubilant all at once. It's like the first melting of snow, with the Sun high in the sky and twinkling off every ice crystal. And the sunshine in the look melts something inside of Beca. She holds the brush out to the side, sitting forward to press a soft kiss on Chloe's lips. It's gentle and unhurried. Treasuring the small moments._

 _Chloe pulls out a photo album to show Beca a picture of herself as a child, next to a short Cuban woman with dark skin and laughing eyes._

The hand at her face falls away to lie on the pavement, twitching. Beca abruptly releases him, getting up and breathing heavily. She can finally see the body beneath her.

His skin is the same shade as the woman from the photo.

 _"You call her Abuela?" Chloe nods._

 _"We aren't actually related, but we might as well be." Chloe traces over the picture with the pad of her finger. "She's family to me."_

Beca braces her arms on her thighs, bending over and puking, just on the edge of hyperventilating. Beside her, the man starts coughing, but doesn't get up. She watches him rub over his throat and roll to the side.

 _"You need to meet her sometime," Chloe rests her arms over Beca's shoulders from behind, letting her nails dry as she nibbles at the brunette's ear. "I'm sad that we didn't get to visit her last time we were there." Beca snorts._

 _"Meeting your parents was scary enough." She rolls her eyes. "I somehow feel like meeting this woman," she waves the photo in her hand, "will be worse." Chloe nips a little harder. "I feel like she's actually a gangster?" The redhead chuckles._

 _"What makes you think that?" Beca puts the photograph off to the side before running her palms over Chloe's legs._

 _"She's got that look that all old people have, you know?" She tilts her head to the side as she thinks. "That look in their eyes that says, 'I've done things, Sonny,' and so I think it might be dangerous for me," she exaggerates her description when Chloe starts laughing, "plus, you said she's a millionaire. She's probably an actual mob boss or something." She mutters about Cuban mafiosos pretending to be sweet old ladies with candy. "Didn't that old lady in the story of Hansel and Gretel have candy?" Chloe slaps her thigh._

 _"You are beyond ridiculous. Remind me why I love you, again?"_

 _As soon as Chloe's ridiculously orange nails dry, Beca pulls her down into the sheets._

Beca spots the knife hiding in the grass. She picks it up and wonders if the man was really going to kill her over money. He's still on the ground, trying to regain his bearings. She taps the flat of the knife against her open palm.

"I could kill you right now, you know." He groans, and the noise sounds painful, like he ate live coals. "I kind of want to." Beca thinks about how easy it would be, with him disoriented. The knife wouldn't have any trouble, being as sharp as it is. She wipes at the stream of wetness on her cheek, sniffing loudly. "But I won't." She throws the knife as far as she can into the trees. Chloe's hands skim over her back, soft like a gentle breeze. "Because we're both worthless enough." She hears Cynthia Rose in the corner of her mind.

 _Find the music, Beca._ She shakes her head.

She hasn't heard any music inside of her since she woke up.

* * *

Beca polishes off her third beer, setting it neatly beside the other two in a triangle. There's a man across the bar who raises a glass towards her before he tips it back. She smirks at him, cocking an eyebrow.

She'd gone back to her apartment to clean up. Finding it to be empty, she decided that she didn't want to be alone in it. The encounter had shaken something loose in her and it sits, sticky and dark like tar at the bottom of her heart, biting at her soul and staining it. She can hear it laughing, voice a toneless groaning inside her head, and Beca doesn't want to entertain it. The man sits next to her and slides a beer over. She studies the label.

"Sure you want to waste the expensive crap on me?" He shrugs, smiling at her. His hair is well-trimmed, styled in an undercut, and the curls flop in a way that reminds Beca of how Chloe's hair would bounce when she laughed. He's got hazel eyes that look like a lake seen through the forest and a great smile that feels like it should glimmer. And if she's being honest, he looks like he could be Flo's brother. The man clinks his own beer against hers.

"Never a waste to give a woman the things she deserves." Beca shrugs. She's not paying for these microbrews, so what does she care.

"Whatever. Your loss, dude." He chuckles.

They talk for a while about random things. Admittedly, Beca's already forgotten his name, forgot it within two minutes of him telling her. But she avoids it by calling him 'dude' and 'bud', ignoring the way her heart cracks at every memory of Buddy that pops into her mind.

"So, come on," he starts, pushing his glass to the side. "Dance with me."

Beca's a few more drinks drunker than when he sat down and so she sways a bit into the table, shaking her head. "No, no Mi- no, Aaron- no - shit, sorry, Brian?" He laughs good-naturedly.

"Adonis," he clarifies. Beca rolls her eyes extra hard.

"Of course you'd have a name like that with," she gestures up his body with her finger, "a body like **that**." He laughs again, reaching for her hand.

"It's still funny the second time. Just one dance?" Beca quietly mutters an, "oops" before humoring him.

"Fine. But only because I forgot your name and apparently part of our conversation," she grouses.

Beca stumbles a bit before grabbing his arm and leading him to the dance floor. She spies Ashley's surprised expression from the corner of her eye, but Adam's being a gentleman, cracking jokes and making her laugh. Some song she doesn't really hear but feels comes on and she starts to dance, pulling him against her and moving.

His hands roam in a less-than-friendly manner, in all the right ways. And really, it doesn't matter that she's drunk. So what?

So what if between every lyric she hears Chloe's voice.

So what if every joke he makes is uttered with a backing track of Emily's boisterous laughter.

So what? It doesn't matter.

It doesn't matter that when he nudges her chin up for a kiss, that Beca tastes Chloe accompanying the lingering microbrew on her lips.

She repeats it over and over, _**so what? It doesn't matter**_ , as she gets a little deeper. His arms wrap around the middle of her waist, sliding up her back with the fingers of one hand spread. When his tongue pushes against her, the sound of Chloe pleading comes crashing through like the siren of a tornado alert, loud and jarring.

 _"You're mine," Chloe cries, "say you're mine." Beca throws her head back, gasping wild and hot as Chloe spreads the wetness between her legs with an urgency that's echoed in her voice. The brunette nods to acknowledge the words and buy herself some time._

 _"Yours," she barely manages to say before it's cut off with her own cry of "ah!" The redhead pushes two fingers in, groaning at the heat. "I'm, I'm-" Chloe kisses her soundly, licking deeply into her mouth and Beca feels a poignant aching in it._

Beca breaks the kiss, shaking her head when he looks at her questioningly.

"Sorry, I can't." He nods, scratching at his stubble.

"Okay, that's fine." He clears his throat and runs his hands over his chest. "That's- that's alright. Um, you okay?" And she nods, too, but more frantically, glancing around for a way out of a room with no walls. She feels trapped by the bodies dancing around them that are oblivious to her mental breakdown. Beca turns back to him, eyes flitting around wildly.

"I'm really sorry-" He puts his hand on her shoulder.

"Hey, it's really okay. No worries." Adonis leans down to speak into her ear. "If you need me, I'm here. Cool?" His hazel eyes shine with sincerity but it's just shy of Chloe and it makes her want to cry.

"Yeah. Um, thanks." She wrings her hands, pulling and twisting her fingers. "I'll - maybe - see you around?" He smiles.

"Sure thing, hot stuff." He winks and laughs, and Beca tries to respond with a smile that doesn't feel like it's going to crack her soul in half like a deep fissure. They part amicably and Beca returns to her post. Ashley perches on the other side, behind the bar.

"I'm worried, Beca." Beca dips her head.

"I'm fine. I just need another drink." Ashley tries to inquire about her dance partner, but Beca doesn't really answer.

"I'm cutting you off soon, Becs."

"Okay." She decides to get something with a higher percentage of alcohol. When her drink comes, it's something that's deceptively sweet and it hides the poison well. She sips at it gently until Ashley has to go tend to the patrons.

It isn't that long before someone else finds her. A woman sits down this time, two shots in one hand and a couple of beers in the other. Her mane is lustrous, bright like the mid-day Sun and eyes like new grass. She's wearing a deep red, backless dress. The blonde deposits her offerings on the bar top before turning to softly shake her hand. She smiles with her whole face and opens her introduction with a clear laugh that Beca hears over the music thumping through the bar before falling into a more demure state, batting long lashes as she looks through them at Beca.

"Elle. Elle Bernier. I hope I'm not interrupting anything?" She has the faintest hint of a French accent, and the way that she's still holding onto Beca's hand speaks of easy and effortless sensuality. And this woman has it in spades. Elle strokes along her hand, matching Beca's left-handedness with her own. Beca shakes her head a bit slowly.

"No, you're not. I'm just brooding," she says candidly. The blonde shrugs with one shoulder and leans closer.

"Why is such a beautiful soul so sad?" The words strike her so keenly that the fissure inside of her opens a little wider, and she feels that inky blackness laugh again, drifting tendrils of pitch-colored smoke through the gap.

"Incomprehensibly crushing problems that I'm trying my hardest to resolve, and resolutely not think about tonight." Green eyes scan her, probing, before acquiescing. She picks up a shot and pushes the other one towards Beca.

"As you wish, dear." The clink is sharp, the sound disappearing in less than a second, but it echoes in her ears, reverberating and replaying on a channel separate from the noise of the bar.

She hears it in the same place that she hears that horrible laughing.

* * *

The brick on the side of Ashley's building digs into her shoulders. Elle's kissing down her neck, muttering things in French and testing her fingers under Beca's shirt. She groans at a particularly ardent bite.

 _"Te amo," Beca repeats, wondering how she can possibly make the words sound any less attractive with her butchering of the accent. It's such a short phrase, but somehow it sounds less magical when she says it. But the way that Chloe looks at her, you'd never guess. The redhead nods, eyes like a shot of something potent and pure._

 _"Yeah. That's good, Becs. Te amo." It's funny, because the way that Chloe utters it, it sounds sublime._

"You're beautiful, Beca." Beca whimpers, pressing her head hard into the brick behind her and scratching over Elle's exposed back.

 _"You're so beautiful," Chloe whispers, fingers dancing over the planes of Beca's belly. Her blue eyes trace as well, like she's trying every way she can to memorize her body._

Elle pants against her neck, hot and heavy as she pleads.

"Come home with me." Beca feels tears prickling at her eyes and they burn when she opens them.

 _"Come home with me this time, Beca."_

"I can't." She shakes her head, groaning when the blonde drops her hands to the swell of Beca's backside, squeezing with purpose.

"You must. I cannot love you the right way here, up against this wall." Her voice is like velvet against Beca's skin, and it comes with a breathless laugh at the end.

 _"Te amo. I love you." Chloe bops her nose, giggling when Beca growls. "Forever and ever." She pushes Beca over to lie flat, sliding to perch above her. Chloe looks up from between the valley of her breasts, with a kind of expression that makes Beca feel like the redhead's undressing her with her eyes even though she's already naked. Chloe slowly kisses her way towards Beca's mouth, leisurely like a meandering river. But each press of lips, each scrape of teeth or brush of her tongue fuels an untamed fire. She's so consumed by the flames that she doesn't realize that Chloe's breath ghosting over her skin is her speaking._

 _"What?" The redhead laughs into the skin of her collarbone, teasing her teeth against it in admonishment._

 _"I'm just professing my love, no biggie," she comments with amusement, licking her way across the bone, working inwards to kiss the hollow. "I love you, and I want to do itthe right way." Beca groans._

 _"Nothing about this feels wrong," Beca tries to focus, "so what's the 'right way' feel like?" She's trying to be sassy, but she misses the tone completely, instead having the words come out slightly desperate-sounding._

 _Chloe just laughs her way into a kiss that wrecks Beca from the inside out._

"Beca." Beca shakes her head.

"No." She grabs Elle by the waist, tugging the fabric of the blonde's dress to draw her closer. Beca kisses her vehemently, trying to push away the voices building in clarity and quantity. She strokes her tongue over Elle's, withdrawing to bite a plump lower lip before delving in again. The moan exhaled into her mouth comes with the whispering of the dark thing crawling from the depths, snickering in the shadows at the edge of her sanity.

 _"Baby..." Chloe arches into her, bowing her back and pushing her breast more fully into Beca's mouth. She moans deep in her throat, and the sound is so full of carnal relief that it twists Beca's guts until she feels like she's going to snap._

Beca sucks on the blonde's tongue, high grunt being drawn out when Elle forces her way under her bra. The blonde kisses her a couple more times before pulling away.

"Please. Come with me." The way that Elle's eyes shine, they catch the light just right and it takes the breath from her lungs. It's a moment that feels like it should be good, but it transitions so quickly into another crack that the hitching of her breath is closer to a sob than anything awed.

"I need to go. I'm sorry." She detaches herself completely from the blonde, hurriedly fixing her clothing. Elle tugs on the sleeve of her shirt, gripping it between her index finger and thumb.

"Beca? What is wrong?" Beca's head twists, locks flying chaotically. She backs away, apologizing in a stream of incessant and nonsensical mutterings.

"I- I- I- think I uh- drank too - maybe - too much. Err- I just need to - um - go- go home." She apologizes again, passing her hands over her ears as the voice in her head laughs loudly and mockingly repeats her words. She starts to walk towards Kimmy Jin's apartment but the woman's face pops into her head, glowering at her and so she turns to head back to her own place.

* * *

She isn't sure if she's ever heard the front door close more loudly than it does on this night.

Beca stumbles through the living room, crying at the amount of voices. Memories, ghosts, her threadbare sanity and this **thing** that's been hiding, waiting for this moment to beat slimy tentacles against the walls of her mind. Her soul and her heart feel heavy and her brain hurts from trying to process everything.

 _ **Nothing's real**_ , it says, picking at her with its hooked appendage, suction cups biting into the flesh of her body and latching on. _**Chloe's not real.**_ She trips over nothing and bangs her elbow into the wall of the hallway. The bathroom door gives her a bit of trouble before she manages to open it, fumbling around in the dark and missing the handle on the first swipe of her hand. _**Emily's not real.**_ Beca acccidentally pushes the door too hard and it follows the path of its hinges until it meets opposition, smacking loudly and she thinks she hears the drywall crack. She considers taking a shower before going to sleep but knows she's too drunk to withstand the ordeal. _**Buddy's not real.**_ She uses the toilet with the barest control over her motor skills, closing her eyes and resting her elbows on her thighs. _**Tony's not real.**_ Beca decides to leave her pants off and knocks a couple of things off the counter before she manages to get the sink running. _**Maggie's not real. Nobody is real.**_ "Shut up," she mutters as she tries to wash her hands. It splashes messily and she feels a few drops soak her shirt.

 _ **All of your memories aren't real.**_ Her arms up to her elbows are wet. Beca sluggishly wipes them on the towel hanging by the sink, missing her attempt to hang it up. She fails and drops it into the toilet instead. _**What's real?**_ The crack splits wide open and the smoke slides out like a cauldron bubbling over, drifting over the surface of her soul. She grips the sides of the counter, shaking her head and crying. _**Chloe's not real. Your**_ _ **heart**_ _ **isn't real.**_ Beca gasps, picking up the soap dispenser and flinging it at the mirror. It doesn't hit hard enough to crack it, but the bottle itself opens and splatters across the mirror and sink. She staggers away and forgets to turn the light off.

Beca makes it into her room by dragging herself along the wall, shoulder bearing her weight. Her bedroom door is already open and so she simply falls into it, crawling on her hands and knees towards her bed. _**Chloe's not real, Beca.**_ She's so intoxicated that her eyes can hardly focus. As she stands up on shaky legs, she steps on a bottle and almost falls again. But her foot slips forward and she's able to catch herself before picking up the object. It rattles. The dull clinking of things inside the hollow plastic signals that it's her hydrocodone. _**Your love isn't real.**_ Beca drops heavily onto her bed.

 _"You're mine, Beca," Chloe kisses over her jaw with a kind of muted reverence that lets Beca know that she's thinking and feeling deeply. She cups the redhead's cheek, bringing her up to meet her gaze. Everything about Chloe moves her intensely, like she's standing on top of a mountain in the middle of an electric storm. Every breath is a boom of thunder, crashing in her ears. Every imprint of fingers is a lightning strike, leaving a threading scar that spreads over her skin. Her kiss is like a lightning rod to channel pure plasma directly down her spine, shaking it profoundly. And her eyes. They're like a hurricane, swirling and tempestuous, full of raw energy. Chloe's eyes have, from the beginning, always made her heart leap the most acutely and yet brought her the greatest peace. They're simultaneously passionate but calm in the center of it all. Chloe's eyes are always the brightest. "You're mine." The redhead turns her face into Beca's palm, kissing softly before resting her cheek in it again._

 _"And I know that we can't ever own people, truly. We're souls," she says, blinking slowly, "so we go where bodies can't follow." Chloe shifts to press her hand to Beca's heart. "But you and I are meant to be. We're twin flames." Her fingers stroke over Beca's skin. "No matter where we are,_ _ **what**_ _we are. No matter what life or how many lives, we will_ _ **always**_ _find each other." Chloe laughs at herself a bit, "gosh, I know it sounds cheesy. But," she leans down to press her lips directly over Beca's heart, "I think I could just_ _ **feel**_ _it when I saw you. So, you're mine, because you will_ _ **always**_ _be mine."_

 _She feels her heart swelling uncomfortably, pushing at her chest and up into her throat. Her laugh comes out wet. Chloe doesn't mind the absence of words, continuing her train of thought with a gentle smile._

Beca empties the bottle into her hand. A couple fall off of her palm and get lost in the floor. She tries to count how many she has, but it's hard to see with the tears and haze of alcohol. _**Chloe isn't real. Your love isn't real.**_ _ **You**_ _ **aren't real.**_ She brings her cupped hand to her mouth, swallowing them three at a time until they're gone. _**You**_ _ **aren't real.**_ She slumps back on the bed, feeling the tablets in her throat. Beca closes her eyes, feeling that calamitous laughter building, its words repeating louder and louder. _**Nothing is real.**_

 _"You'll always be mine, just like I'll always be yours."_


End file.
